honeycomB: we have a very similiar head of hair, i would describe myself as 4aFi also, complete with the whole thick feeling when hair is not relaxed.
Because my strands are super fine, i've always opted for a milder strength. My hair also appears thick in some areas when relaxed because of its density, but overall that is not the case.
I think MY hair breaks down pretty quickly using mild, so that's the strength i will continue to stick with. but Motions oil brand relaexr produced results like no other. Weirdly enough i was tempted to use it for my next relaxer application /images/graemlins/blush.gif, without the additonal olive oil mixed in and starting with he most resistent areas first. , it did take to some areas before, i think i just screwed up on the timing.