Take your paws of my mane.......%@#!!

[MochaSilk]

I would put alittle bass in y our voice, get that look that you mama used to et when she was done playing, and let them know. Also I know it sounds awful, but sometimes when I don't want people to touch my hair I'll be like I don't know where your hands have been, really stank like and an insult to them. They may be alittle perturbed at the implication, and will think you're a little b*****y, but at least they'll stop.

That's fantastic advice! It sounds like no matter what you do to your hair - worn down, updo, wigs, etc - people are gonna be up in it. Nice doesn't work with some people.

Plus, something else to think about... it's better for people to be annoyed with you for 15 minutes than wondering all week why you're so withdrawn and distant. If you do the distant thing, people will come up to you to see what's wrong and like you said, put their hands in your hair.

Getting a little short & aggressive will be like a pop on the forehead and they'll remember that. BUT they'll notice that you're being friendlier and more involved. You won't have to have your guard up all the time (which gets exhausting) because you established your boundaries.

A drawback with keeping in inside or being nice is that you run the risk of unloading on the 50-11th person to put their hands in your hair. What if it's a little girl at work for Take Your Daughters to Work Day?

Think about the "mama's done playing" look and the bass in your voice. Oh, and finish it with an eyebrow raise.

 

[Nature'sWay]

This is my # 1 pet peeve. I think it's disgusting for people to put their hands in my hair because I don't have a clue where their hands have been and what they've been touching. I think you should tell them to stop harassing you and they're not being paid to touch your hair. Or you can say ' I've told you once and I'm not telling you again. Keep your germ-infected hands to yourself.'

Touching my hair is a pet peeve of mine too. One time my hair was out and I went to lunch with a few of my family members and my aunt grabbed a fist full of my hair and started pulling it. I wanted so badly to slap the s*$t out of her but with her being 50 something years old I may have caused her to have a heart attack. I was mad about it the whole day I couldn't take it and I called her and told her that it pissed me off the next morning on my way to work. She apoligized but I felt like why would you put your hands in somebody's hair when you are about to eat or otherwise period.

 

[Tenejita10473]

Yea I don't like that. Especially when people don't ask. I mean it could mess up your style I wear a puff alot and it cant still get messed up despite what people think.

If I were you and they simply wouldnt get the point after you telling them, then I would begin playing with their hair, I don't htink they would like it so much. Or maybe they are just that oblivious.

 

[hottopic]

Well noone touched my hair today. Yeah. I am very happy about that. I am going to wear my hair out for the summer. I am going to be strong this summer. Thanks everyone

 

[hottopic]

I HAD TO GET RUDE TODAY...... The girl that I told I don't like people touching my hair did it again today. I said it rude today, " I don't like people touching my hair" and moved away. She did not say anything to me after that. I felt kinda bad, but I had to do it. lol Thanks ladies.

 

[kandi1280]

I HAD TO GET RUDE TODAY...... The girl that I told I don't like people touching my hair did it again today. I said it rude today, " I don't like people touching my hair" and moved away. She did not say anything to me after that. I felt kinda bad, but I had to do it. lol Thanks ladies.

Girl you did what you had to do. I'm very particular of non-family/friends touching me. My personal space is MY personal space and that's it. Plus Thanks to the Russ Parr morning show I swear everyone is tainted lol.

I'm glad that you got your message across girl. Rock your hair that you worked so hard for!

 

[MochaSilk]

I HAD TO GET RUDE TODAY...... The girl that I told I don't like people touching my hair did it again today. I said it rude today, " I don't like people touching my hair" and moved away. She did not say anything to me after that. I felt kinda bad, but I had to do it. lol Thanks ladies.

Sista, you have me up here in my home office all alone, cheering and applauding my monitor!!!

WAY TO GO!!!!!!!!

 

[Nefertiti0906]

Yes I feel your pain
This always happens when I wear my hair down, which is also why I rarely wear it out. And another thing is that it's so unexpected, I'll be in a middle of a conversation and they'll catch me off guard by pulling my hair. Or when my back is to them, they'll run their fingers through, maybe searching for tracks

In my experience it has usually been black females, and a few black males.

 

[glamazon386]

Tell them to stop. AGGRESSIVELY. I don't see why it's rocket science to them. Didn't they learn to keep their hands to themselves in kindergarten?

 

[gloomgeisha]

I'm only slightly annoyed by people touching my hair. I tend to have oil in it and when they draw back a nice Vatika scented hand they tend to learn to stop touching my tresses. I had a co-worker who would insist on touching my hair at least 2 or 3 times a day, he was a white male- so I said in front of everyone

"This isn't 1854. You're not allowed to just touch and molest me whenever you feel like it."

I was joking, but the implications were enough to get him to never touch my fro again.I find you can get people to stop by making them slightly uncomfortable. But you can still say it in a way that they chuckle at their own behavior and realize where you stand.

 

[Zawaj]

LOL @ this whole post ! I wear my hair covered except for at home but I have had people molest my hair THROUGH my scarf ! I'm like whoa!

 

[caribeandiva]

Stand up, look them dead in the eye, and with a straight face and terse voice say: "Please do not touch my hair; it makes me very uncomfortable". then get back to whatever it is you were doing. don't apologize or crack a smile either.

 

[Ladylyn]

You are not alone..I get that all the time and I hate it . When nice doesn't work sometimes you just have to take it to nice nasty. No one has the right to invade your personal space. I believe it is because they are caught up in the myth that black woman can't have long hair so regardless of what you say they want to touch it to prove its not your hair. Be firm be strong no means no in any circumstance. Girl don't let those people dictact how you should wear your hair. You worked hard to get where you are flaunt it.

Once someone put gum in my BF's hair (BSL 3c natural). Not saying they would do that but its reality. Go get em' girl!

 

[SvelteVelvet]

My sister did this to me today at a gathering we had. She's behind me and says "It's growing!" rake rake rake. And rigourously too, at the very ends of my hair and I felt a little break. Yeah, it's just a hair, but what the heck? Why do you have to touch it? And her hair is longer than mine, she's full APL and it looks longer than that sometimes. I don't get it.

 

[Mz.Shug]

LOL @ this whole post ! I wear my hair covered except for at home but I have had people molest my hair THROUGH my scarf ! I'm like whoa!

Hair molestation

 

[danigurl18]

One of my coworkers touched my hair today without even asking... ugh!!!

 

[misschee]

i feel y'alls pain...i was out to dinner in Greece with some fellow school mates just sitting around talkin and this Greek man who was playin the guitar and singing came up behind me and touched my hair (it was in braids but so what). first off i cant stand for people i dont know or like to touch me and i hate to be petted i am not an animal. so when i snatched my head away my fellow school mates laughed at me when i told them my mother always told me not to let people touch my hair (i was the only black female, 1 black male and 5 white people) and for the rest of the trip they would bring it up and laugh....that got on my last nerves.

i had a class with this one girl i didnt particularly care for and one day i decided that i wanted to straighten my hair. i sat right next to the door so when class was over she had to walk by me to leave. she had the audacity to reach up and touch my hair like we were best friends. and on top of that she is natural too and wears her hair pressed so i dont see why she was so damn facinated. and for the final clencher she is a lil fast ass girl so i really really really didnt know where her hands had been

 

[Cassandra1975]

Hmmm, I haven't had this problem. Not even when I had my Angela Davis/Pam Grier going. People would get closer to look at it, but they didn't actually touch it.

At my current job, they definitely don't. I don't think they are used to having so many black people in the office, anyway. Also, could be that I have been known to say loudly, "you know some people in here don't wash their hands!" as I break out my sanitizer. You may very well wash your hands, but what if the person leaving the bathroom before you didn't...you've touched the door handle where they touched, inadvertently picking up their germs. When I say, "don't touch me", I mean it.

In the end, it doesn't matter WHY the person asked you not to touch their hair. Just be respectfly and act accordingly. Think of randomly touchging their hair as someone walking up to you and randomly grabbing your tay-tas...

 

[Eisani]

Like it says under my name, pa manyen which means don't touch! Can't stand it, especially when it's curly when people wanna pat it to flatten it and don't even get me started on trying to run fingers thru it...are you kidding?! Some people I don't really mind touching my hair but then I get to thinking, I HATE oily hair and I don't know where these people's hands have been and they're just depositing their Filthy McNasties all up in mi pelo. I don't even like dd petting me like a Yorkshire Terrier. I just pull my head away and say, "Unh, unh. I don't like that" or, depending on who it is, "Beat it." Then again, my nickname @ work is Sunshine, meant in an oxymoronic way so they don't expect much more from me anyway

 

[Queen V]

I have this same problem. As the one person of color around, whenever I wear my hair down it's a fascinating novelty to everyone around.

 

[SmilingElephant]

I know how ya feel!!

And wearing a wig in Florida in June is like climbing Mt. Everest!!
You shouldn't have to do that. But if i were you...i'd wear my hair in a cute bun or something only at work or wearing a Banana Clip so that when you leave...you can take it down and wear it.

Otherwise...smack there hands really hard....that'll get the job done!

 

[*Luscious*Locked*Doc]

You are a grown woman and so are these other people. You have already stated that you don't like people touching your hair to these individuals, but you should also be allowed to do with your hair what you please. You need to tell your boss and co-workers in a professional manner that you find their behavior inappropriate and unprofessional. In some ways its a form of harassment and it is making you uncomfortable in your work place. If you say this firmly and in a no-nonsense manner I know that the inappropriate behavior will stop.

 

[SmilingElephant]

I just got an idea!!

How about...after you've asked them numerous times to stop touching your hair...walk in the bathroom, flush the toilet and come back and say...when you touch my hair...this is what it feels like...

then sneeze in your hand and grab their face and pinch their cheeks and walk off shouting "how do ya like them apples!?"....thats sure to work!! LOL!!!

 

[naturalgurl]

People are putting their hand in my hair at work…I HATE IT. I don’t want to be rude, but people (black girls, white girls and one gay man) keep touching my hair. I am like what the hell. I told them I don’t like people touching my hair. This one girl begged me even said “pretty please.” Next week I am going back to my wigs, because I can’t stand it any more. I wore wigs for the past 3 months, but now it’s getting hot (I am in FL). I can’t survive in a wig during the summer time in FL. What should I do ? I already told these people to I don’t like their hand in my hair. But for someone odd reason they go deaf. AHHHH….

CONGRATS on your weight loss. People want to touch my mane when I wear puffs or wear it down. I just think people are attracted to it because it looks like cotton candy!LOL!

 

[Barbara]

It's rare that someone touches my hair, but then I only wear it down once every now and then.

 

[SvelteVelvet]

That happened to me this weekend with a couple of friends I went out with, I wore it straight (went to the dominicans) and both of them simultaneously just kept touching and touching until I finally walked away from them. It is aggravating and the longer it gets (touching BS now) I can only see it getting worse, especially with family.

 

[tasty0619]

this happened to me a couple of weeks ago...i thought i was the only one, well heres my story:

i came in one monday with a big curly half wig on(looked like mine) and all the *ahem* caucasian ppl were fascinated for some odd reason, so my boss is standing next to me talking bout something unimportant then she starts petting my hair, i look at her like WTF?!?!?! and she stops then she's like can i pull it, i really wanted to say " can i pull yours??" but i didn't i said "NO!" and walked away...THEN my supervisor came over to by me later, and my back was to her, and she like ran her fingers through my hair, i gave her behind the look of , and she looked kinda scared , than she tries to save face and says "its so soft, what do you do??" OOOO i was sooo irked...all this in one whole day