Surprised about what my stylist (brother) had to say about stretching/relaxing

[blackbarbie]

I just saw my brother for the first time in a long time (probably only twice since I got my last t/u on Dec. 7). I am at almost 20 weeks post and decided I was going to stretch it out another 4 weeks. I have been just wearing my hair pinned up, but not necessarily a bun though. He asked what I was doing, if I was transitioning (guess b/c I had asked him a lot of questions about it before).....Told him I would be to see him in 4 weeks. His response was: It looks fine; a little wavy on the sides, but it looks fine to me. If you can go without getting a perm this long, why put one in there right now, especially with the summer weather and you may end up wearing it up most times anyway? I tell women all the time, don't just get a perm at 8 weeks just b/c that's what you're used to, but if you have gone this long, your hair isn't shedding, it's still manageable, if I were you, I would stretch it out over the summer since you were going to be wearing it up anyway and if you want it straightened out for a special occasion, just come in and I can straighten your roots out for you."

It will be 6 months once I get my t/u if I make it to June 7th and we talked about me going natural again and he said a lot of his clients are opting to go natural and he advises it if that's what they want to do and tells them that it could be an easy transition if they can manage the two textures and keep the hair moisturized very well. (which is something he DIDN"T have to tell me; learned that from you ladies!)

I guess the point I was trying to make was that I would have suspected a stylist to have a totally different point of view on stretching and it was refreshing to hear him take this approach to it. (although he did say that stretching this long may not be for everyone, to listen to your hair.....which we all already know that too!!!)

 

[balisi]

I'm a stylist who shares your brother's sentiments on this subject and have advised some of my clients accordingly.

 

[blackbarbie]

I'm a stylist who shares your brother's sentiments on this subject and have advised some of my clients accordingly.

Do you find that a lot of your clients still come to you during their transition or do you just give them a lot of information to do a successful transition on their own (advising them on products, tips, techniques, etc. for a successful and healthy transition)?

 

[TropicalRose]

i wish i had a stylist in the family! haha

ive never met a stylist that would give such advice. i remember one time before i went natural, some ladies at a beauty school told me that i "needed" a relaxer after 1 month! i barely had any new growth, so it didnt make any sense to me. thats how relaxed hair gets ruined! constant straightening will just dissolve away the hair

i say if you arent having any problems with the 2 textures and you dont want to go natural, then just stretch longer...

 

[wadadligyal]

It's good to know that not all stylists recommend a touch up every 4-6 weeks

 

[Lynnerie]

It's good to know that not all stylists recommend a touch up every 4-6 weeks

I second that emotion! And its cool that your bro is a stylist cause you know he'll want the best for youBlackbarbie. I agree, you have to listen to your hair. Its been 16 weeks of stretching for me so far and I bought the generic chi last night from Sally's. Its definitely a keeper!

 

[Tene]

I wish I had a stylist in my family and it would be nice if all stylists were like that.

 

[blackbarbie]

Him embracing natural hair may have something to do with the fact that he had natural twists for about 2 or 3 years and then just woke up one morning and cut them off! They were about shoulder length and he kept them really nice and neat, and then one day, just - POOF! They were gone!

 

[~*~ShopAholic~*~]

Good news from a stylist , that was very well put. That's what I tell my clients that are relaxed all the time, especially the younger ladies.

 

[madamdot]

I wonder if its natural hair stylist thing being in touch with and respecting thier hair. One of my stylist is like this too. She does not want to see anyone for a touch-up before 6 weeks and she often refuses to do one if she thinks you dont need it. On the other hand if someone had substantial growth, no color and using a "gentler" relaxer she will.

She is very, very gentle. No overlapping, no tugging, doesnt get mad at you if you stretch for long period of time, and dusts (yes, that right - dust). She never double books, so no waiting, she does one person at a time and she even listens to my suggestions about her own hair or to tell to other clients . . . . I mentioned the S-curl thing for those who might like it.

In general, just a fabulous stylist. BUT, like most people like that it is virtually impossible to get an appointment. I hate her other clients for doing this to me . . . OK maybe not.

But I wanted to chime in here because we read so much about the bad stylists that we should definitely "big up" the good ones.


I am gonna call to make an appointment right now!

 

[mzcaramelicious07]

Wow...my stylist is completely different! I waited 12 wks one time, and she told me we (black women) don't need to wait longer than 6-8 wks. She said there is no reason to wait longer than that. If you see a wave, then its time to relax! I used to do my own touchups, but recently decided to start going to one. I've been to one probably the last 4 times. Well the first time I went, I asked her how long she was going to leave it in and she said for me to tell her when I starts to burn! And I didn't ask her that question until about 15 minutes of it being on my head. I told her that I only like to leave it on there for 10 minutes and she told me, "No....you don't take it out until it burns. I like strraaaaaaaiiiiggggggggggggggggghhhhhhhttttt hair." So the next time, I asked her to take it out after 10 minutes and she said no because it won't get straight. Why do I have to just moniter the time myself and just tell her it is burning when I see the 10 minute mark come?????????????

 

[NeeSee]

I remeber the beautician I went to all through out junior high and high school used to strecth my relaxer all the time. Alot of times I got my hair relaxed 3x a year, 4 at the most. I stretch without any problems, like I do now.

 

[NeeSee]

Wow...my stylist is completely different! I waited 12 wks one time, and she told me we (black women) don't need to wait longer than 6-8 wks. She said there is no reason to wait longer than that. If you see a wave, then its time to relax! I used to do my own touchups, but recently decided to start going to one. I've been to one probably the last 4 times. Well the first time I went, I asked her how long she was going to leave it in and she said for me to tell her when I starts to burn! And I didn't ask her that question until about 15 minutes of it being on my head. I told her that I only like to leave it on there for 10 minutes and she told me, "No....you don't take it out until it burns. I like strraaaaaaaiiiiggggggggggggggggghhhhhhhttttt hair." So the next time, I asked her to take it out after 10 minutes and she said no because it won't get straight. Why do I have to just moniter the time myself and just tell her it is burning when I see the 10 minute mark come?????????????

If I were you, and this is just me, but if I were you I would be finding myself another beautician. It seems TO ME that she may not be to educated when it come to hair health. Chemicals are a serious thing which I know you know. Over time I am willing to bet all your hard work put in will be a waste of time because she will be doing more damage on her own. But then again this is JMHO.

 

[atlien11]

I'm a stylist who shares your brother's sentiments on this subject and have advised some of my clients accordingly.

Balisi is a great stylists for those of you that live in atlanta!!

 

[kitchen_tician]

Yes, Balisi is! I'm currently transitioning and I'm 11 months post relaxer and she did a great job flat ironing my hair. Sorry to hijack, but I had to give props to Balisi too.

BlackBarbie, it's good to hear stylists embrace natural hair. I'm so used to hearing negative feedback from stylists and non stylist, so sad. I feel the same way as your brother, as far as if I can stretch to a certain amount of time, then why relax. 6 months was my timeframe to decide if I was going to transition.

Balisi is a great stylists for those of you that live in atlanta!!

I'm a stylist who shares your brother's sentiments on this subject and have advised some of my clients accordingly.

 

[sky_blu]

Well I have a stylist in the family and she does better than my old stylist but sometimes her advice can be wrong and sometimes I find that she withholding some advice I wish she would tell me instead of just waiting for me to ask her. I burn easily because I have very dry scalp and she keeps it on too long unless I say Im burning. Im burnt everytime but she's the best I can find in my area. Most stylist here like to fry your hair, put a gang of products in it, or weave it up.

 

[balisi]

Do you find that a lot of your clients still come to you during their transition or do you just give them a lot of information to do a successful transition on their own (advising them on products, tips, techniques, etc. for a successful and healthy transition)?

Both. When they come in for services, I "prescribe" products, styling options, etc. for them to use and do in between visits, based on their needs. But sometimes I learn from them too.

 

[balisi]

I wonder if its natural hair stylist thing being in touch with and respecting thier hair. One of my stylist is like this too. She does not want to see anyone for a touch-up before 6 weeks and she often refuses to do one if she thinks you dont need it. On the other hand if someone had substantial growth, no color and using a "gentler" relaxer she will.

She is very, very gentle. No overlapping, no tugging, doesnt get mad at you if you stretch for long period of time, and dusts (yes, that right - dust). She never double books, so no waiting, she does one person at a time and she even listens to my suggestions about her own hair or to tell to other clients . . . . I mentioned the S-curl thing for those who might like it.

In general, just a fabulous stylist. BUT, like most people like that it is virtually impossible to get an appointment. I hate her other clients for doing this to me . . . OK maybe not.

But I wanted to chime in here because we read so much about the bad stylists that we should definitely "big up" the good ones.

I am gonna call to make an appointment right now!

I definitely agree with your first sentence.

I'm your stylist's clone! I follow these same practices! It is so important to listen, and to respect your client's time as well as her hair.

I agree with your final point as well. It is always wonderful to hear about good stylists, because we do exist!

 

[divinefavor]

Balisi is a great stylists for those of you that live in atlanta!!

In total agreeance!!!! Balisi is awesome!