hunnychile
Well-Known Member
What are some things that you respect about your partner?
Furthermore, how do you show this respect in your relationships?
Furthermore, how do you show this respect in your relationships?
Showing respect
- Thread starter hunnychile
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Mai Tai
Miss Nigeria-America
My husband is a manly man and I am a very girly girl. I love and respect the fact that we approach situations in different ways. He is very protective of me and is a caring person all around.
I respect that while he is not perfect, he is always striving to do and be better. From the beginning of our relationship (and we've been together for a loooooong time) he's always had the desire to be a better friend/boyfriend/fiance/husband to me, make me smile more, to be more affectionate, more romantic, a better son/sibling, make more money etc.
I show respect to him by:
- Listening to and using his ideas (even if I'm not 100% convinced)
- Not taking over and letting him succeed or fail without my input. For example...we were on our way to a party one time and he was driving. He stated that he knew how to get to our destination, but 15 minutes into the drive, we ended up lost. Now, I could have pulled out my phone's GPS and given him directions, and yes, he was causing us to be late, but you know what? I kept my mouth shut and kept jamming to my music, kept laughing and talking as we wandered around the city. We eventually made it and even though I was pissed at him for causing us to be late, I kept it moving. Later that night he actually thanked me for not getting on his case about getting lost.
- Believing the best in him (even if I'm angry with him or skeptical)
- In times of anger choosing not to yell or cuss at him
- Even though a man is SUPPOSED to provide for his family I make a point to show that I appreciate him paying bills, staying employed, doing small side hustles to make money because it could be different. He could be a sit-around-all-day-and-run-up-the-light-bill-because-he's-home-playing-video-games-all-day type of dude.
I respect that while he is not perfect, he is always striving to do and be better. From the beginning of our relationship (and we've been together for a loooooong time) he's always had the desire to be a better friend/boyfriend/fiance/husband to me, make me smile more, to be more affectionate, more romantic, a better son/sibling, make more money etc.
I show respect to him by:
- Listening to and using his ideas (even if I'm not 100% convinced)
- Not taking over and letting him succeed or fail without my input. For example...we were on our way to a party one time and he was driving. He stated that he knew how to get to our destination, but 15 minutes into the drive, we ended up lost. Now, I could have pulled out my phone's GPS and given him directions, and yes, he was causing us to be late, but you know what? I kept my mouth shut and kept jamming to my music, kept laughing and talking as we wandered around the city. We eventually made it and even though I was pissed at him for causing us to be late, I kept it moving. Later that night he actually thanked me for not getting on his case about getting lost.
- Believing the best in him (even if I'm angry with him or skeptical)
- In times of anger choosing not to yell or cuss at him
- Even though a man is SUPPOSED to provide for his family I make a point to show that I appreciate him paying bills, staying employed, doing small side hustles to make money because it could be different. He could be a sit-around-all-day-and-run-up-the-light-bill-because-he's-home-playing-video-games-all-day type of dude.
Crystalicequeen123
Well-Known Member
^^Great points!!! 
This is something I have to work on...especially the part about allowing a man to succeed or FAIL w/out my input. I didn't realize this was such a huge deal to men until I read John Gray's "Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus" book. Men actually take it as a sign of disrespect if you try to tell them where to go, or even take out your GPS w/out their asking. But w/women, if I were to take out my GPS, other women in the car would consider it being "Helpful", not disrespectful.
Ahhh...just another way men and women are different. It's hard, but I"m working on this!
This is something I have to work on...especially the part about allowing a man to succeed or FAIL w/out my input.
I didn't realize this was such a huge deal to men until I read John Gray's "Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus" book. Men actually take it as a sign of disrespect if you try to tell them where to go, or even take out your GPS w/out their asking. But w/women, if I were to take out my GPS, other women in the car would consider it being "Helpful", not disrespectful. Ahhh...just another way men and women are different. It's hard, but I"m working on this!
ladysaraii
Well-Known Member
I'll admit that car thing would have me struggling. If we're going to his event, whatever. But if it's somewhere I need or really want to be, I don't see myself being so silent. He might just need to be mad for a bit.
Yeah, I got work to do.
Yeah, I got work to do.
biznesswmn
Well-Known Member
^^Great points!!!
Me too. I am learning that there are lots of thgs men find disrespectful that we do 'trying to help'.
Might have to dust 'mars/venus' off and give it another read
Mai Tai
Miss Nigeria-America
I know!
The longer I'm with my dude, the more I realize that men really are wired differently and approach life in a different manner. Sometimes I seriously don't understand why my husband gets offended over things that I find harmless, and he's expressed confusion over things that I've found hurtful that he considers harmless.
I think it is essential that us women learn to truly respect and come to appreciate the way men operate, just like it is essential for men to love and embrace our more nurturing helpful nature.
Kimbosheart
Well-Known Member
Threads like this are why I renew my membership. I love the practical advice. I'm definitely learning that we are wired differently. My example is interruptions in a conversation. For instance, if I'm talking and I mention X as a part of my story, he starts talking about X. I get upset because I feel disrespected. Well the other night I inadvertently did that to him and it was no big deal to him at all. He joined me on the tangent and when I pointed out my mistake, he wasn't worried at all about it and said if he thinks of what he was talking about he will bring it up then.
One thing, I really need to work on is assuming the best in him, even when I'm skeptical. I do trust him, but I'm also just a skeptical person and my day job is based on me being a skeptic. It's hard to put that away sometimes.
One thing, I really need to work on is assuming the best in him, even when I'm skeptical. I do trust him, but I'm also just a skeptical person and my day job is based on me being a skeptic. It's hard to put that away sometimes.