Set back input

[2buttonsnow3]

Hey,

I have a natural hair question. Back in 09/10 I started growing my relaxer out. Well a few months after I had Isaiah I decided. I don't know what to do with natural hair, I don't have time for it, don't know how to style it, I'll just stick with what I know, etc. etc. well I decided to put a relaxer in, in the heat if emotion. bad idea. I regretted it. The relaxer didn't take well you know because I didn't leave it in long enough and now I'm stuck with 3 diffrent textures in my hair. Relaxed, natural, and texlax. My goal is to be natural 100%. I've made that decision and I'm ready to embrace. My question is should I continue to grow out an cut the relaxer out gradually or should I just cut it all off and start from the beginning. typing that makes me so am with myself. I know I have to make the decision myself but I just need some input from someone who understands. What do you suggest? What is your experience with maybe talking to others or even yourself.

 

[StarScream35]

Grrrrl, I did the same exact thing. I actually became natural by accident. What happened with me was that I swore off AA hair stylists and salons so I started doing the relaxers myself. I used Mizani Butter Blends which texlaxed me even though I left it on long enough. Come to find out, Mizani BB does this to lots of women. I used it only about 3 times before throwing in the towel and deciding to go full on natural. I let the relaxer grow out without big chopping because I don't have the right head shape for a big chop. I gradually cut my hair here and there cause I was definitely experiencing breakage at the demarcation line and breakage from experimenting with products. It was a battle but I got there. It was the best decision ever and if I had to do it over, I would do it the same way!

 

[MsDee14]

I think you should gradually trim and grow out your relaxed/texlaxed/natural hair.
While growing it out, you can learn how to style it, figure out which products work best and enjoy "longer" hair until you're ready to BC again.

 

[lana]

I was relaxed, then natural, then texlaxed, now transitioning...back to natural...so!

What I did the entire time was keep trimming off the hair I didn't want. I look like I've been either APL and then BSL over and over again for the last 5 years. (lol). It's okay, it's thick and healthy and long, so I'm happy with it.

My original goal when joining LHCF was collarbone length!

So do what makes you feel happy. I can get really cute twist outs with all this hair, so I'm keeping it. It's hard to tell the difference now between natural roots and texlaxed hair.

If you want short hair, now is the time, but I personally like the way I look with longer lengths no matter what state (texlaxed, relaxed or natural). I wish you the best on your healthy hair journey!

 

[faithVA]

I think you should let it grow out and trim over time. If you big chop and don't have a plan you may get frustrated with your hair. You can always decide to big chop later. But if you big chop you can't go back.

 

[2buttonsnow3]

Thanks ladies! Awesome input.

 

[HoneyA]

I've been natural 3 times and each time I just grew it out until I was satisfied with the amount of hair on my head before I cut off the processed ends. The fact that you asked for advice suggests that you do not want to do a BC or are hesitant. That's fine. There's a lot of info here to help you. Just grow it out and trim bit by bit like others have said. Check the Transitioning without the BC thread for ideas. Good luck! HHG!

 

[koolkittychick]

You got a lot of great responses, so I'll make mine short and sweet. I did the big chop twice before (cut 5 months post relaxer down to TWA), and while I enjoyed the ease of styling and the "getting acquainted" phase with my TWA, the "in between" phase I went through before I hit APL was not so much fun for me.

Knowing what I know now about how to care for my hair with two different textures on my head (I stretch my relaxers to 12 weeks minimum), if I went natural again I would long-term transition rather than BC. In fact, once I get to WL (I'm past APL now), I may just transition if I can't get the thickness and density I want for my fine hair to look its best at this length.

Good luck with whatever you decide! (So much for making this short!)

 

[Theresamonet]

IMO, If the reason that you relaxed, was because you're pressed for time as a new mom, then you might want to just big chop.

I've BC'd before and I've also transitioned for 2+ years. Transitioning, especially initially, can require a lot more special attention, than being fully relaxed or fully natural. And you having 3 textures to maintain may just not be worth the hassle at the moment.

A twa is very low maintenance and will probably work best with your current lifestyle.

 

[2buttonsnow3]

Thank You ladies for the input. The reason I haven't cut it is because of my husband. He doesn't like short hair. Me going natrual is a adjustment for him but I think he's gotten used to it. I think I'm past the point of caring about what others say including him. Out of respect of course but I really feel like I have a goal and I need to do this for me.
I'm not sure 100% what I will do but I'm thinking about just cutting the rest off. I'm the type of person who likes to check things off my list and move on. Lol. U ladies are really the best. I think I will cut it off and then weave it up with some bobraz until it grows out.

 

[Seamonster]

whether you enjoy a short natural style or fight with four different textures is your choice, but I would urge you to get to know your natural hair while it is short. Many individuals that have never been natural have an easier time learning short natural hair than a huge mound of it. Try wigs for length while you learn your hair.