Separation/Divorce

[MzRhonda]

How was that first call to the attorney?

I finally got enough nerve to call one but went on and on about how I wanted to save my marriage ie marriage counseling. LOL.

Now I need to actually call and perhaps start the legal separation process and I just can't do it...plus I need an attorney who will rip him to shreds.

I can not afford to move out nor can I afford the bills by myself - we have 2 kids. Married 15 years.

 

[Sparker65]

Girl the first time I called and the attorney started telling me about the process, I changed my mind. I thought to myself, my marriage ain't that bad to go thru all of this. The financial part and trauma for the kids is what made me reconsider. I have been married for 17 years and have 2 kids. Well one is now 21, so I just have one at home. I don't know how bad your situation is, but if you think you need to go ahead with the divorce, make sure you get someone who is passionate about divorces.

My attorney loves what she does and she is good. I was hotheaded and mad when I called her but after I calmed down, I changed my mind. My husband is not having an affair or beating me up, he just gets on my nerves quite a bit. I figure I can just tune him out or not speak to him for a week and all will be well. Good Luck. HTH.

 

[jrae]

My first call was fine. I was very ready and didn't call for a separation/divorce until I was absolutely positive it was over. If you're not ready or have doubts, slow down. Commit to marriage counseling, personal counseling, marriage retreat, prayer, study, etc.

 

[ThatJerseyGirl]

How was that first call to the attorney?

I finally got enough nerve to call one but went on and on about how I wanted to save my marriage ie marriage counseling. LOL.

Now I need to actually call and perhaps start the legal separation process and I just can't do it...plus I need an attorney who will rip him to shreds.

I can not afford to move out nor can I afford the bills by myself - we have 2 kids. Married 15 years.

To the bolded - perhaps you should be communicating this to your husband.

There are a lot of things to consider. First, it's hard out here in terms of dating (i.e., HIV, STD's, etc). Second, think this through. He may want joint custody where you will have to share custody of the children, which will mean no child support, in some cases. Of course, they take into consideration both incomes of the parent.

If you have a valid reason for a separation such as abuse, adultery, drugs (things that may impact the children), then maybe you should seek separaton/divorce options. But I will say this first. TALK to your husband and let him know how you feel. Be careful in your choice of words. Do not bring up separation or divorce per se, but let him know why you are unhappy, and maybe he feels the same way and would want counseling. Having said that, let consulting an attorney be your very last option. Exhaut all efforts first. This way, at the end of the day, you can say that you tried.

Last but not least, PRAY on it. No lawyer will ever tell you that.