Response From A Dominicana to thread about our culturee

[BeetleBug]

didnt slide pictures of essence in there.Im new to this bare with me.

All of your children are so cute!

 

[Nice & Wavy]

Welcome, Cubanit!!! You are very pretty and so are your children!

 

[rabs77]

Thanks Cubanit. Your thread really goes to show that there are several sides to every story. Since I do not know any Dominicans..my opinion of them was being made up solely by what I read in that thread. Thanks for paying that 5 bucks and joining in .

 

[Ms Lala]

Thanks so much for post this. As with anything else the media will take one side of something and generalize it to everyone. If you look at the stories published about black Americans you'd think we were all uneducated, smoke weed, eat chicken, on welfare, and commit crime. We should be informed enough to know that just because some hold that point of view it doesn't apply to everyone. The good hair bad hair idea is in many cultures but it's definitely not the only mindset that people of that culture have.

 

[Bint Yusef]

Thank you for posting. It was too many pots calling the kettle Black over there. Also knowing full well that you cant rely on the media to present an accurate representation of an entire nation of people in one article.

 

[tatje]

I just wanted to say hello and welcome cubanit.

I agree with you. I was hurt reading the article as I am Haitian and it just made it seem like to be haitian is ugly and I know that is not the case.

But I feel what your saying.

 

[ChocalateDiva]

Welcome!!! Do ya thang girl- represent yo set!! LOL

 

[spiceykitten]

Welcome chica, I try to stay out of such threads because I am often misunderstood but I completely understand what you wrote and know there is another side of the story. If people understood there is different perspectives than perhaps there would not such long threads.

 

[BrooklynSouth]

Cubanit has a point. I read the article and could not believe that mess. I guess same as in NYC when something big goes down some reporters choose the lamest character to be the witness on camera. I always wonder where were the sober, intelligent people with teeth and a decent vocabulary when the reporter was seeking a witness?!?

 

[Supergirl]

Welcome Cubanit

So, that's what we had to do to get you to join, huh? Just kidding

Thanks for sharing your POV

 

[favorc]

Welcome aboard!!!

 

[Ms Red]

NuMe2004, very well-written post

And welcome Cubanit.

First, I'd like to say, "Welcome Cubanit!"

Secondly, I want to say that I agree with you in that the views expressed in the article should not be considered a representation of an entire group of people. However, I do believe that every culture has their hangups in terms of skin color and hair, so you shouldn't take too strong offense to that.

I have had friends of every race, and each of them expressed to me at one point or another, their warped view of beauty. Let's face it, we live in a society that celebrates European-esque looks over ethnic looks. In the grand scheme of things, our standard of beauty has been largely shaped by a predominantly white Hollywood and images of Barbie.

My Indian, Latino, and even Asian friends have talked about their skin color issues. In addition, the term "nappy" is used even by White Americans to describe difficult to manage hair, which many consider to be the antithesis to beauty. These standards go beyond hair and skin, as one of my Asian friends has even talked about getting surgery done on her eyelids in order to give them a hooded look, which is representative of Western roots.

I can go on and on, but the point I'm trying to make is that although you and your family may not have issues with skin, hair, heritage, etc. other people do. I'm not saying everyone does, so maybe the article was throwing around generalizations. Yet, there are still a lot of folks out there who unfortunately do struggle with such issues.

 

[chayil0427]

Thanks for sharing this side of the story. It is definately easy to read something in the news about another culture and just accept it as the truth.

So welcome to the board! I hope you'll stick around for the hair journey!!!

Chayil

 

[naijamerican]

I appreciate your post and your desire to show that not everyone thinks the way that article would have us believe. So welcome aboard and I hope to hear from you some more!

 

[WomanlyCharm]

Thank you for your views Cubanit, I'm so glad you posted. That article upset me quite a bit, because it was so one sided.

Welcome to the board!

 

[shocol]

Welcome! Thanks for posting. It was shocking because that article made it seem like there was a mass denial of African ancestry in the Dominican Republic.

 

[StrawberryQueen]

Looking back. I didnt mean to come of hard.But ther were so many nasty things said in that thread I felt backed into a corner Thanks for understanding.

You needed to come off hard, because folks were being ignorant and foolish. I'm glad you were able to explain yourself.

I don't understand why folks want to fault ALL Dominicans for thinking the way that a lot of AAs already do?

 

[YUMMY28]

welcome cubanit!!!!!!

 

[sareca]

I've said it once I'll say it again, you can't believe everything you read.

Welcome cubanit!

 

[Lady Esquire]

Cubanit, first off WELCOME to LHCF!!

Second, thanks for signing up to view your opinion. I was born and raised in NY and Miami...two highly-mixed cultural cities. My mom is Haitian (and her mother was half Haitian/half Dominican). She used to go across all the time for shopping and visiting relatives. In fact, she used to share stories of the Duvalier days, where her family, who were in Haitian politics, would flee to DR for refuge. Most Dominicans were kind and some weren't...but that is the story with any nation. Anyway, I am very familiar with Dominicanos and their history. I love DRs culture and I am planning to purchase a condo or a vacay spot soon, since Haiti is so volatile right now.

Lastly, I am glad to hear you express your Dominican pride and acknowledge your roots. It makes this discussion much more balanced. Many people are raised to beleive black is black, spanish is spanish, white is white, and so on. But once there are cultural infusions, that is when people try to divide others into small compartimentalized segments. Even the Spanish cultures themselves have not fully understood how to approach this subject properly -- and that was a great point you made!

I have met many in my own culture who make anti-black or dark-skinned comments. I have also met Latinos who make negative comments. So I fully understand that, just because a few small-minded people make some ignorant comments, it does not reflect on an entire nation. Thanks for pointing it out and dropping some knowledge. Like I said in the last thread, your problems are our probems...its all relative.

Welcome and have fun here!

 

[ChasingBliss]

Hey Cubanit,

I'm glad I had the opportunity to read your point of view as well. I have come across many Dominicans with a harsh light/dark mentality. But I understand that doesnt mean the majority is like that.

 

[Healthb4Length]

Welcome Cubanita! Your kids are so cute! Thanks for sharing you view point. Being a Jamaican girl myself I can understand you defending your culture. There are rotten apples in every culture, and as many have stated before I've heard both positive and negative views regarding being of African descent within my own culture, with AA and Hispanics. Many people of the Diaspora will have some sort negative view on there Blackness, but all the Dominicanos/Columbianos/Hondurenos and other BLatinos I've met always have alot of "orgullo." This article is extremely myopic and I am so happy that you put the truth out there. So many AA will flat out deny their Blackness and say they are "Indian" or "mixed" (if your Indian or Mixed don't take offense!), so many Jamaicans will say the same etc...you know how it goes!

 

[lsubabiedee]

You needed to come off hard, because folks were being ignorant and foolish. I'm glad you were able to explain yourself.

I don't understand why folks want to fault ALL Dominicans for thinking the way that a lot of AAs already do?

good question

 

[dona_flor]

You needed to come off hard, because folks were being ignorant and foolish. I'm glad you were able to explain yourself.

I don't understand why folks want to fault ALL Dominicans for thinking the way that a lot of AAs already do?

I'm glad that I read the article. I thought it was quite interesting,more so because I recognized many of the opinions that were expressed. I've heard many Black Americans saying the same things, or WORSE about our hair & skin color. "N***a hair", "cuca-bug hair", "blue gums", "you got a lotta nerve, with your ugly black a$$", "good grade of hair", "I got some Indian in my family, so I got that good hair"....etc. You've heard it, I've heard it, and I still hear these things to this day. We all know perfectly well, if someone calls you BLACK (like it's a accusation or something ), they're trying go for your jugular vein. It's not meant as a compliment.

But of course, not all Black Americans feel this way, so it's reasonable to assume that not all Latinos (Dominican or otherwise) feel this way.

Welcome Cubanit , and thank you for sharing your point of view.

-Dona Flor

 

[Lovelylocs]

Sorry to bring up old stuff. I was searching for a thread on the DR b/c I miss the island and I came across this thread.

Question for cubanit: Have you ever lived in the Dominican Republic? If so, then where and how long?

I think that for Dominican Americans things may be slightly different. The fact that u are half Cuban may play a role too. When I lived in Santo Domingo, I did notice a certain negacion de si mismo sentiment. I think that the problems w/the articles and threads on Dominican identity on this board is that they tend to leave some important aspects of the issue out. Things are slowly changing in the DR, but they still have a long way to go.

Both the AA and the Dominicans (who actually grew up and live in the DR) have issues, but they are very different IMHO.

 

[DayStar]

I'm glad that I read the article. I thought it was quite interesting,more so because I recognized many of the opinions that were expressed. I've heard many Black Americans saying the same things, or WORSE about our hair & skin color. "N***a hair", "cuca-bug hair", "blue gums", "you got a lotta nerve, with your ugly black a$$", "good grade of hair", "I got some Indian in my family, so I got that good hair"....etc. You've heard it, I've heard it, and I still hear these things to this day. We all know perfectly well, if someone calls you BLACK (like it's a accusation or something ), they're trying go for your jugular vein. It's not meant as a compliment.

But of course, not all Black Americans feel this way, so it's reasonable to assume that not all Latinos (Dominican or otherwise) feel this way.

Welcome Cubanit , and thank you for sharing your point of view.

-Dona Flor

thank you!

 

[princessnad]

I am not Dominican, so all I can do is share what I experienced when I was there (visiting) and what family members experienced when visiting.

When I was there in Santo Domingo, there was a higher rate for internet cafes and other businesses if you were Hatian. So maybe there is more hatred for Hatians specifically instead of simply for everyone dark-skinned.

My family who I lived with was white and because I had some hang-ups speaking Spanish, they thought I couldn't understand. They made constant reference to my roomate (a sweet blonde girl) getting her food first, her choice in rooms etc. They also made fun of my hair. (I wore it big and wavy at the time)

When my cousin was there (she is very fair skinned), she was in good graces with the people she was staying with. When her fiance came to visit (a dark man), she was asked why she would lower herself to date someone who looks so 'Hatian' and that she deserves better.

When they taught Dominican history in the classroom, they claim none of the black blood that is currently in any Dominican is really Dominican. Meaning, they accept the white (Spanish) blood as well as the native blood, but claims that all black blood is from "cocolo's" who invade their country. A "cocolo" is the name they give for black caribbeans who reside in the small eastern islands or the Hatian invasion. Keep in mind most of the people there who would be considered black in the US with NO question would claim that they have no black blood. I don't know why someone would deny their blood if they have no problem with it.

I say these things while still keeping in mind that everyone isn't the same. I understand most western countries still have issues with race and that DR is not a huge anomoly. But there are some issues there. I don't think every single Dominican thinks this way, but in my experience (like I explain above) some DO.

 

[Blessed_Angel]

Welcome to the board. Much respect to you for clearing the "air" and EDUCATING others. Just like you stated, some Dominicans think that way; and some do not. I once dated a Dominican who denied any African ancestry; eventhough his complexion and hair couldn't be denied. And my Dominican hair stylist brags that she's Black! So, yes, you'll get different views.

I cannot stand stereotypes. I don't think I can ever get used to them. I was born in this country (my mother is from Belize, though), and my husband is Haitian; so he used to tell me that his friends and family was surprised to see that I had a job and education (and was not living on welfare with a lot of kids). And that I even knew how to cook! It wasn't new to me cause my mother used to say the same things to me while growing up about Americans (and still does!). Some Black Americans do well in life; and some don't. You just have to take the time to get to know people and accept them for who they are before an assumption is made about them.

Thank you for putting the truth out there: Dispelling the stereotypes and opening minds for other cultures as well. We ALL deal with being put into one basket. It's helpful to open minds so that we can learn to love one another with some knowledge and understanding; and bring something more to the table than just assumptions. One person doesn't speak and shouldn't be allowed to speak for one culture.

God bless

 

[sharifeh]

Welcome Cubanit! I'm sure your money won't go to waste here.

I don't think anyone was generalizing the whole nation. Or single DR out. It's just that the article was about DR, so I see how it could have seemed that way.
But I see how it could be misleading for those people who have never been around many Dominicans.
But as someone who has been around lots Dominicans, white, black and in between...it pretty much matches up with what I've seen and what I've been told.

 

[kandake]

Welcome Cubanit! I'm sure your money won't go to waste here.

I don't think anyone was generalizing the whole nation. Or single DR out. It's just that the article was about DR, so I see how it could have seemed that way.
But I see how it could be misleading for those people who have never been around many Dominicans.
But as someone who has been around lots Dominicans, white, black and in between...it pretty much matches up with what I've seen and what I've been told.

Uhm Sharifeh,

This thread is two years old.