pray for me i was being ugly in church

[PretteePlease]

and i have been highly irritated/ on the verge of an attitude
i will try to keep it short but found a seat in church where
there was plenty of room on either side. then 3 people sat
down and i was happy cause our row was full. then this man
and his woman came in while i was standing and clapping to a song
with my daughter so when i sit i am super cramped. now her man
was big not obese but too big to try to squeeze in. so new song
her and her man are standing clapping. so she ****s down on me
LITERALLY SITS ON ME. I KNOW I'M WIDE BUT (TRYING NOT TO CUSS)
ok so she is sitting on me like its just ok and i know i'm not the only one
uncomfortable. but i am like hey its great that church is packed. but if i come
to church and see only room for my daughter i will sit her down and take a seat near by. how come these grown folks couldnt do the same. so i see
her visitor packet and feel really bad because if i have an attitude she may
never come back. so i see an empty seat at the end of the row in front of us
but i'm not close enough to take it. so a few songs later. thats another thing i come to church for the word not a concert and praise dance performance that lasts longer than the teaching/preaching. ok so a few songs later another woman in the row that was being squeezed by the man that squished his way in moved to the empty seat. then she looked at me and i smiled because at one time i had to put my 9yr old on my lap and i was still being sat on like it was just ok. so i try to be nice but then dude has the nerve to sit sideways after the lady got up to make space so everyone was sitting on top of each other again. literally sitting on eachother. now i was trying to be cool but how inconsiderate. this did not keep me from enjoying service
but i was really in a mood after that. then i was wrestling with myself when the
invitation to join the church was given. i like the church and have been visiting on a regular basis since last july. but there are things i dont like but
that would be anywhere. but the main reason i havent joined is that i am trying to make sure that i join because i feel led to join I DONT WANT TO JOIN
SO THAT I CAN SEE THE MAN WHO INITIALLY INVITED ME. I FIND MYSELF TRYING TO AVOID MAKING EYE CONTACT WITH HIM DURING SERVICE.
I really feel like the devil is after me everytime i start feeling good and motivated something happens. is it because i really feel at home there now. i even went to tuesday night service and it was great but i still have this chip
on my shoulder. and i was upset that he wasnt in church.
long story short i have been easily irritated since sunday. oh i am on birthcontrol for the first time. its not because i am having sex its because i have endometriosis and my dr does not want me to have a monthly except 2xs per year. i have been in alot of pain and have joked that my ovary is trying to escape
this was my first time skipping the 4th week and starting a new pack
do you think thats the reason i am in a moody or am i under attack because i am seriously considering joining that church or both. either way pray for my health and my attitude. i am in tears as i type this message.

 

[toinette]

and i have been highly irritated/ on the verge of an attitude
i will try to keep it short but found a seat in church where
there was plenty of room on either side. then 3 people sat
down and i was happy cause our row was full. then this man
and his woman came in while i was standing and clapping to a song
with my daughter so when i sit i am super cramped. now her man
was big not obese but too big to try to squeeze in. so new song
her and her man are standing clapping. so she ****s down on me
LITERALLY SITS ON ME. I KNOW I'M WIDE BUT (TRYING NOT TO CUSS)
ok so she is sitting on me like its just ok and i know i'm not the only one
uncomfortable. but i am like hey its great that church is packed. but if i come
to church and see only room for my daughter i will sit her down and take a seat near by. how come these grown folks couldnt do the same. so i see
her visitor packet and feel really bad because if i have an attitude she may
never come back. so i see an empty seat at the end of the row in front of us
but i'm not close enough to take it. so a few songs later. thats another thing i come to church for the word not a concert and praise dance performance that lasts longer than the teaching/preaching. ok so a few songs later another woman in the row that was being squeezed by the man that squished his way in moved to the empty seat. then she looked at me and i smiled because at one time i had to put my 9yr old on my lap and i was still being sat on like it was just ok. so i try to be nice but then dude has the nerve to sit sideways after the lady got up to make space so everyone was sitting on top of each other again. literally sitting on eachother. now i was trying to be cool but how inconsiderate. this did not keep me from enjoying service
but i was really in a mood after that. then i was wrestling with myself when the
invitation to join the church was given. i like the church and have been visiting on a regular basis since last july. but there are things i dont like but
that would be anywhere. but the main reason i havent joined is that i am trying to make sure that i join because i feel led to join I DONT WANT TO JOIN
SO THAT I CAN SEE THE MAN WHO INITIALLY INVITED ME. I FIND MYSELF TRYING TO AVOID MAKING EYE CONTACT WITH HIM DURING SERVICE.
I really feel like the devil is after me everytime i start feeling good and motivated something happens. is it because i really feel at home there now. i even went to tuesday night service and it was great but i still have this chip
on my shoulder. and i was upset that he wasnt in church.
long story short i have been easily irritated since sunday. oh i am on birthcontrol for the first time. its not because i am having sex its because i have endometriosis and my dr does not want me to have a monthly except 2xs per year. i have been in alot of pain and have joked that my ovary is trying to escape
this was my first time skipping the 4th week and starting a new pack
do you think thats the reason i am in a moody or am i under attack because i am seriously considering joining that church or both. either way pray for my health and my attitude. i am in tears as i type this message.

hey ms. p. i just wanted to say i'm real sorry for what you're going thru and i can understand your annoyance at the man. but whats' uo about the man you dont want to or do want to see? do you think this may be the real root of your problem and issue abotu joining the church? i hope you feel better

 

[PretteePlease]

well basically i was getting to know the guy we went out on a few dates but we havent talked in a few weeks
which isn't out of the ordinary i try not to see him because he sits in the front behind one of the deacons in the musicians pit
being that he is in the front i try to focus on the pastor or whoever has the attention of the church at the time
basically i have a crush on him and i know he likes me but i'm not sure how much but i have been conscious of
this fact since b4 i first visited because it can get wierd if you join for the wrong reason
so on purpose the first time i visited i did it when he was out of town and the
first time i went to weekday service he wasnt there either and i rarely talk to him after church
so it isnt that we see each other and speak and sit together or things like that
i think the real root of my problem might be my health. i have been battling with it since 98
its woman stuff makes me hormonal and causes pain etc. i just realized that i have been
extremely nauseous since sunday which is something that i have battled since about 2000
usually when i feel bad my attitude follows

btw thanks for your response, it was late and i was sick tired and a bit crazy

 

[Divastate]

Hey HB-
I'd definitely consider switching birth control pills if you keep feeling like that. When I was first on the pill the pharmacist gave me the generic version and I had a very bad reaction (felt nervous/uneasy, jittery and upset all the time) - if you've had this sort of discomfort lately that just might be it and you need to find another pill to try.

 

[PretteePlease]

thanks hair buddy glad to see you back posting
i think i was emotional guys probably was them darn pills
but i do still genuinely want to make sure i am not joining church to
be near that certian someone so i will probably wait b4 i join

 

[TrustMeLove]

I would definetely check with my doctor about the birth control pills. Could you also be a little emotional/moody from your health problem? Could this be a new stage of your health problem?

Oh and the issue with the man, you not making eye contact not wanting to go on the days that hes there is normal. It could happen in any situation. IE. say you love this sandwhich shop, but your ex works there..your going to the sandwhich shop for the sandwhiches, not for him, regardless of what he may think. So you try to get there before he does or after he gets off work, just because you don't want him thinking you always up there for him. Because you know your really up there because they sale good sandwhiches for cheap! and to let him know your still look good with or without his butt. Thats basically the situation your in.

Stop worrying about when he go be at church, when he not..if he see you.. Im sure you wouldn't keep going to a church if your spirit wasn't being fed.

Oh and sidenote..lay off the LONG praise and worship bashing ahaha lol :-D..thats my favorite part of service. I just feel I can connect with God at that time and that hes really with us while we give him praise and glory and honor. I would love your church.

HEHEHE.

Well, ill pray for you tonight too. I pray everything works out.

-Trust

 

[cybra]

Hey MP!

You know as I read you post I told the Lord, "Satan won't leave your children alone, will he?" You mentioned many things that say to me Satan or one of his workers (Satan's not omnipresent) was pushing your buttons. This person was new to your church, as you mentioned. Often we we see people we don't know what they have been through or are going through that brings them to church, but Satan may know. Maybe this woman has just started straightening up her act with the Lord, and the irritation of you was to deter HER. Many times we may thing something is about us when it's not about us at all. However, I'm sure you've heard of "killing two birds with one stone," and if Satan could keep you from praising God AND get you to say something to this couple that might make them leave the church, he would have done just that.

The bible tells us we are to be "...slow to anger" but it seems Christians get mad at things faster than those in the world. What I do when I encounter something that I feel is trying to inhibit my relationship with God, keep me from giving him the full praise he deserves, or tries to make me not be in order with what God has for my life, I stop IMMEDIATELY and I begin to pray. Satan is NOT stronger than the Spirit of God in us...let's not make him think he is. But Satan uses everything at his disposal to influence, manipulate, and/or turn us from what God would have us do. Likewise, we have to use everything God has given us (his Holy Spirit, His Word, and the name of Jesus) to counter Satan's attack. We cannot do it on our own, that why prayer to the Father is a must.

Yes, I would check the meds you are on to see if they may be affecting you in some negative way. But, keep in mind, God is stronger than meds too. You see what I mean? God has no limits and he can overcome whatever we are going through. All he ask is that we call upon his name. There isn't anything I won't call him for...nothings too small or too big to call on God. We have to keep God in the small stuff as much as we keep him in the big stuff. IMO, it's not the big stuff that usually gets us off track, it's the small stuff...that ends up big.

Our church gets packed too at times so I do feel your situation. But, this is a sign that God is blessing your church (You can tell the tree by the fruit it bears), so be thankful that he has not left you out of his rain of blessings. You could have been home, but no, YOU WERE IN CHURCH AND WITH YOUR BABY...praise God! Your steps are being ordered by the Lord, and God is getting your little girl ready for service. She will watch you, mommy, for ways to act when she's in situations. This is something I have always thought with my daughters when they were small, they will watch me to see how I handle "bad" situations. And if I go to the Lord, when they are in similar situations, so will they. I'm a "Live Christ don't talk Christ" kind ofa person. By the best example of your relationship with him is when you are going through something, not when nothing is going on.

I thank God you did not say anything so Satan did not get the victory. As for the guy, be watchful that the advisary does not take your focus off God when you are at his [God's] house visiting. You have come to be in the presence of the Lord, you are not there for anyone else. Just try and keep that in mind. Psalm 139 starts, "O Lord, you have searached me and known me. Thou knowest my downsitting and mine uprising, thou understandeth my thoughts afar off...," meaning God is searching our hearts all the time everyday to such a degree that he knows things we have not even thought yet but will think. Don't let him find you in his house full of "junk." Sweetie, always be watchful because the bible says that evil is present with us ALWAYS!

God bless you and I pray that you feel better

 

[AnnDriena_]

I'm soooo sorry you went through this. I know how little annoyances can take your mind off the big picture.

I'm also glad my church has seats and not pews

I'll pray for you. I also know how you feel I have had bad crushes on men at my church. And one of the pastors didn't help too much when he read a question (we get to write down questions and turn them in at the end of the service and the pastor picks one to read) someone asked how to get to know someone they like and the pastor said try and get into the same things as them in a social settings and the sly dog cracked a big smile and segued into our cell groups (our church is huge so cell groups are groups of people that get together on a regular basis and do social things and/or have bible study together) he said you should try and get into the same circles they're in and he smiled real big and said we call them cell groups. And I thought great, now the pastor is giving ideas on how to stalk people

But I did find myself trying really hard to concentrate on the word and not on mr. cutie face in the row ahead of me. I feel your pain.

 

[Kalani]

I have struggled with situations like these. I love going to my church and never miss a Sunday if I can help it. When I am there I am very serious about absorbing the word and allowing God to speak to me about certain areas of my life that could be improved. So needless to say I tend to get quite annoyed by distractions like fidgeting(learned to never sit behind a certain woman whos body swayed back and forth continuously while seated), making a lot of noise while opening gum or candy wrappers, whispering and talking during service, etc...

I attempt to block it out but it distracts me and the distraction turns to annoyance and I feel bad for feeling that way. Well, I was humbled in these feelings not too long ago. During a service an older lady sitting behind me had brought in a plastic bag.
Well toward the end of the service when the pastor was giving an alter call I could hear the woman opening and closing the bag, crinkling it around, and basically just messing with it. It was making a considerable amount of noise and seemed to go on forever! I was thinking "can you just leave that darn bag alone for now!" It was really getting to me!

Well, when the service ended the lady went into her bag and pulled out colorful, hand made towel/washcloths that she had knit/crotched(not sure which term) for everyone. We have a small church but it was still very thoughtful of her to put the time and effort into making them for everyone!

I felt really bad for being so annoyed with her earlier. From now on when I hear noise I try to give the person the benefit of the doubt and realize they probably aren't aware that they're movements/actions are a distraction to others. I still don't like it but I try to watch my attitude about it!

 

[PretteePlease]

ok i feel a lil better knowing that 1) i kept my cool and 2) i am not alone in trying to stay focused

keep the testamonies commin!!!!

trustmelove i'm not a praise and worship basher but at song #35 i get a lil testy LOL

 

[cybra]

ok i feel a lil better knowing that 1) i kept my cool and 2) i am not alone in trying to stay focused

keep the testamonies commin!!!!

trustmelove i'm not a praise and worship basher but at song #35 i get a lil testy LOL

35 songs! Unless that was a musical I probably would have found that a bit too much too

 

[lonesomedove]

35 songs! Unless that was a musical I probably would have found that a bit too much too

 

[PretteePlease]

ok maybe i exaggerated the number of songs but
just for fun one sunday i'm gonna keep count LOL

 

[oglorious1]

ok maybe i exaggerated the number of songs but
just for fun one sunday i'm gonna keep count LOL

That's the exact reason why I like 7:30 A.M. service at my church, I'm like let's just get down to business...I get irritated when they have a gazillion announcements, and we gotta know that pookey's grandma from Mississippi is here and all that other stuff(enough already), I just wanna get my Praise and Worship on and hear a Word from the Lord...

 

[14got]

Hey MP!

You know as I read you post I told the Lord, "Satan won't leave your children alone, will he?" You mentioned many things that say to me Satan or one of his workers (Satan's not omnipresent) was pushing your buttons. This person was new to your church, as you mentioned. Often we we see people we don't know what they have been through or are going through that brings them to church, but Satan may know. Maybe this woman has just started straightening up her act with the Lord, and the irritation of you was to deter HER. Many times we may thing something is about us when it's not about us at all. However, I'm sure you've heard of "killing two birds with one stone," and if Satan could keep you from praising God AND get you to say something to this couple that might make them leave the church, he would have done just that.

The bible tells us we are to be "...slow to anger" but it seems Christians get mad at things faster than those in the world. What I do when I encounter something that I feel is trying to inhibit my relationship with God, keep me from giving him the full praise he deserves, or tries to make me not be in order with what God has for my life, I stop IMMEDIATELY and I begin to pray. Satan is NOT stronger than the Spirit of God in us...let's not make him think he is. But Satan uses everything at his disposal to influence, manipulate, and/or turn us from what God would have us do. Likewise, we have to use everything God has given us (his Holy Spirit, His Word, and the name of Jesus) to counter Satan's attack. We cannot do it on our own, that why prayer to the Father is a must.

Yes, I would check the meds you are on to see if they may be affecting you in some negative way. But, keep in mind, God is stronger than meds too. You see what I mean? God has no limits and he can overcome whatever we are going through. All he ask is that we call upon his name. There isn't anything I won't call him for...nothings too small or too big to call on God. We have to keep God in the small stuff as much as we keep him in the big stuff. IMO, it's not the big stuff that usually gets us off track, it's the small stuff...that ends up big.

Our church gets packed too at times so I do feel your situation. But, this is a sign that God is blessing your church (You can tell the tree by the fruit it bears), so be thankful that he has not left you out of his rain of blessings. You could have been home, but no, YOU WERE IN CHURCH AND WITH YOUR BABY...praise God! Your steps are being ordered by the Lord, and God is getting your little girl ready for service. She will watch you, mommy, for ways to act when she's in situations. This is something I have always thought with my daughters when they were small, they will watch me to see how I handle "bad" situations. And if I go to the Lord, when they are in similar situations, so will they. I'm a "Live Christ don't talk Christ" kind ofa person. By the best example of your relationship with him is when you are going through something, not when nothing is going on.

I thank God you did not say anything so Satan did not get the victory. As for the guy, be watchful that the advisary does not take your focus off God when you are at his [God's] house visiting. You have come to be in the presence of the Lord, you are not there for anyone else. Just try and keep that in mind. Psalm 139 starts, "O Lord, you have searached me and known me. Thou knowest my downsitting and mine uprising, thou understandeth my thoughts afar off...," meaning God is searching our hearts all the time everyday to such a degree that he knows things we have not even thought yet but will think. Don't let him find you in his house full of "junk." Sweetie, always be watchful because the bible says that evil is present with us ALWAYS!

God bless you and I pray that you feel better

Beautiful!!

Satan is a Killer. He wants to stop all growth, your's and their's.

 

[star]

I think its all of the above. I hope the drugs they you are using is helping your condition if not stop using them. I really believe if something can stop your body from ovalating it is strong. Be careful and try to seek natural methods for the body like black cohosh and dong quai. If you can go to nutrionist or natural path doctor. I know it is hard to be a Christian but God is able to keep you so you can grow into the beautiful woman He wants you to be. Ask God to give you the stength and recite power scriptures out loud in your car until you get to the Church. Rise above this situation and be Christ like because God will see your attitude of humilaity and bless you. A blessing is always on the other side of trouble. Obtain your blessing don't lose to something that is not worth it.

and i have been highly irritated/ on the verge of an attitude
i will try to keep it short but found a seat in church where
there was plenty of room on either side. then 3 people sat
down and i was happy cause our row was full. then this man
and his woman came in while i was standing and clapping to a song
with my daughter so when i sit i am super cramped. now her man
was big not obese but too big to try to squeeze in. so new song
her and her man are standing clapping. so she ****s down on me
LITERALLY SITS ON ME. I KNOW I'M WIDE BUT (TRYING NOT TO CUSS)
ok so she is sitting on me like its just ok and i know i'm not the only one
uncomfortable. but i am like hey its great that church is packed. but if i come
to church and see only room for my daughter i will sit her down and take a seat near by. how come these grown folks couldnt do the same. so i see
her visitor packet and feel really bad because if i have an attitude she may
never come back. so i see an empty seat at the end of the row in front of us
but i'm not close enough to take it. so a few songs later. thats another thing i come to church for the word not a concert and praise dance performance that lasts longer than the teaching/preaching. ok so a few songs later another woman in the row that was being squeezed by the man that squished his way in moved to the empty seat. then she looked at me and i smiled because at one time i had to put my 9yr old on my lap and i was still being sat on like it was just ok. so i try to be nice but then dude has the nerve to sit sideways after the lady got up to make space so everyone was sitting on top of each other again. literally sitting on eachother. now i was trying to be cool but how inconsiderate. this did not keep me from enjoying service
but i was really in a mood after that. then i was wrestling with myself when the
invitation to join the church was given. i like the church and have been visiting on a regular basis since last july. but there are things i dont like but
that would be anywhere. but the main reason i havent joined is that i am trying to make sure that i join because i feel led to join I DONT WANT TO JOIN
SO THAT I CAN SEE THE MAN WHO INITIALLY INVITED ME. I FIND MYSELF TRYING TO AVOID MAKING EYE CONTACT WITH HIM DURING SERVICE.
I really feel like the devil is after me everytime i start feeling good and motivated something happens. is it because i really feel at home there now. i even went to tuesday night service and it was great but i still have this chip
on my shoulder. and i was upset that he wasnt in church.
long story short i have been easily irritated since sunday. oh i am on birthcontrol for the first time. its not because i am having sex its because i have endometriosis and my dr does not want me to have a monthly except 2xs per year. i have been in alot of pain and have joked that my ovary is trying to escape
this was my first time skipping the 4th week and starting a new pack
do you think thats the reason i am in a moody or am i under attack because i am seriously considering joining that church or both. either way pray for my health and my attitude. i am in tears as i type this message.