Ignoring the Shoulder Rub: Why I Don’t Do Pity Coloring
We’ve all been there. It’s 5am in the morning; your partner comes out of a coloring dream, and slowly
slides their hands to your shoulder to gently wake you from your deep slumber. As you’re pulled from your beautiful dream vacation in Tahiti, you realize that no, you’re not being woken up for an emergency, instead your partner is slowly beginning to kiss your neck in hopes of making you aroused. You glance over at the alarm clock. It’s hours before you have to be at work.
Really? Did you REALLY just pull me out of my sleeping glory just so you can get some?
At least, that’s what crosses your mind. You have a choice to make. You either decide to conjure up your hormones to enjoy this awakening or you choose to put sleep first.
I choose the latter. I almost always ignore the shoulder rub or tell my partner to chill out.
I’m not the best morning person. It typically takes me a minute to get my mind right when I wake up and if you say anything to me in the first 20 minutes after waking, I likely won’t remember. When it comes to coloring, I’m all or nothing. Either I’m fully present and ready to make your toes curl or I’m asking you to get off me because I’m not in the mood. I love coloring as much as the next person, but I truly believe in honoring my body’s needs and not forcing my cookie jar to do anything it doesn’t want to.
But there are those that beg to differ, those who grant their partner that early morning quickie while silently hoping that they’d finish as soon as possible. I get it. In particular, when dealing with a male partner, most wake up with you know. But there’s no point in entering a coloring session tired and irritated just because your partner would prefer to stroke instead of releasing on his own.
I’ve had this conversation with my girlfriends, and most are tired of getting that early morning shoulder rub.
“Without fail, it always happens. We colored the evening before, go to sleep exhausted and peaceful. And then he wakes me up at 5am,” said one of my home girls. She wasn’t even talking about the same dude either. It seems to be a recurring pattern with most of her male partners.
So I asked her if she gave him some after he woke her up. She replied yeah with a bit of agitation in her voice. I told her that the opposite of that word would save her a lot of grief and sleep. What’s so hard about telling your partner no when you’re not in the mood?
I recognize that there are two (or more) people to please in a physical relationship, but with the right communication and conversations, I’m sure that the parties involved can express what times are not best for coloring. After all, it’s important that coloring partners be on the same page when it comes to pleasure. Coloring is supposed to reduce stress and cater to our desires, not become aggravating.
Do you grant your partner pity coloring session? Or are you always in the mood? Speak on it!
(Yes I changed some words of the article)
i happen to love middle of the night sex, myself. my bf can make a production out of sex sometimes, and i find things more efficient when we've both randomly woken up to do it 
erplexed
"Coloring" is more fun when BOTH people think so and I wish more women lived their lives with this in mind. 
