Connie
Well-Known Member
And go back "home" to the hair I had before my walk on the chemical side began.
Lately, I've been at a real fork in the road with my hair, and a discussion with my stylist this past weekend pretty much sealed the fact that I will continue letting her relax my hair, or I got what would be my last touchup.
I got my first professional perm when I was 22, after a botched-up attempt at self-relaxing for the first time. My first stylist was a scissors-happy, heavy-handed, loud-mouthed chick whose own hair was never longer than 2 inches and who would get snippy whenever I protested getting my hair chopped. It was when I switched stylists that I found out that I had excessive breakage, leaving my hair so uneven that my new stylist refused to work with it unless I got much of it cut. It took some persuading on her part, but I relented and ended up with short hair for the first and only time in my life. A year later I had my shoulder-length hair again. That stylist then got pregnant and ended up quitting, and after a year-long stint with a fellow male stylist at the same salon (that ended when he went in rehab) I ended up with my current stylist. In addition to being a great lady, she has always been supportive of my desire to grow my hair as long as I can and has always given me good advice (that I admit I seldom followed) and I would hate to lose her.
However, after being relaxed for 20+ years and considering the rate at which my hair grows, even with a couple of bob cuts over the years, my hair should be dragging the floor. But I'm forever shoulder length, and it's been really nagging at me and I'm wondering why I'm going through it all. I've never had really thick hair, but it was thicker than it is now. And having grown up on the hot comb and learning how to detangle my natural hair, it wouldn't be that difficult of an adjustment for me. I don't know what 'type' my hair falls under (growing up you either had "good" hair or nappy hair), but I know how to comb it and detangle it. It's just a matter of deciding whether I'm ready to take a little more time with it.
I had a dream a couple nights ago, where I was combing my hair. It was natural, and it was halfway down my back. I woke up and was disappointed when I realized it was a dream.
I think that being over 40 has a lot to do with my feelings about my hair. On one hand, I'm tired of the constant focus on length, almost to the point where cutting it ultra short is sounding better and better. On the other hand, I'd love to be able to say I achieved BSL without having to relax it. Relaxing is getting old and hell, it's just time for something DIFFERENT, kwim?. I want to do something else with that money and I'm tired of spending half of a weekend in the salon.
Needless to say, I've been reading a lot of the naturals/transitioning threads to help me decide. I attempted to transition years ago without the BC and couldn't do it. The timing wasn't right. This time feels different. I've even lurked on the Nappturality boards but those ladies are too militant for me. Natural hair ain't that deep to me; it's just my hair.
Thanks for letting a sister vent.
Lately, I've been at a real fork in the road with my hair, and a discussion with my stylist this past weekend pretty much sealed the fact that I will continue letting her relax my hair, or I got what would be my last touchup.
I got my first professional perm when I was 22, after a botched-up attempt at self-relaxing for the first time. My first stylist was a scissors-happy, heavy-handed, loud-mouthed chick whose own hair was never longer than 2 inches and who would get snippy whenever I protested getting my hair chopped. It was when I switched stylists that I found out that I had excessive breakage, leaving my hair so uneven that my new stylist refused to work with it unless I got much of it cut. It took some persuading on her part, but I relented and ended up with short hair for the first and only time in my life. A year later I had my shoulder-length hair again. That stylist then got pregnant and ended up quitting, and after a year-long stint with a fellow male stylist at the same salon (that ended when he went in rehab) I ended up with my current stylist. In addition to being a great lady, she has always been supportive of my desire to grow my hair as long as I can and has always given me good advice (that I admit I seldom followed) and I would hate to lose her.
However, after being relaxed for 20+ years and considering the rate at which my hair grows, even with a couple of bob cuts over the years, my hair should be dragging the floor. But I'm forever shoulder length, and it's been really nagging at me and I'm wondering why I'm going through it all. I've never had really thick hair, but it was thicker than it is now. And having grown up on the hot comb and learning how to detangle my natural hair, it wouldn't be that difficult of an adjustment for me. I don't know what 'type' my hair falls under (growing up you either had "good" hair or nappy hair), but I know how to comb it and detangle it. It's just a matter of deciding whether I'm ready to take a little more time with it.
I had a dream a couple nights ago, where I was combing my hair. It was natural, and it was halfway down my back. I woke up and was disappointed when I realized it was a dream.
I think that being over 40 has a lot to do with my feelings about my hair. On one hand, I'm tired of the constant focus on length, almost to the point where cutting it ultra short is sounding better and better. On the other hand, I'd love to be able to say I achieved BSL without having to relax it. Relaxing is getting old and hell, it's just time for something DIFFERENT, kwim?. I want to do something else with that money and I'm tired of spending half of a weekend in the salon.
Needless to say, I've been reading a lot of the naturals/transitioning threads to help me decide. I attempted to transition years ago without the BC and couldn't do it. The timing wasn't right. This time feels different. I've even lurked on the Nappturality boards but those ladies are too militant for me. Natural hair ain't that deep to me; it's just my hair.
Thanks for letting a sister vent.
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i just mean it is warm and inviting. 
I was thinking about relaxing my hair again and I was like what am I going to do when I hit 40, no way would I be at that age still getting relaxers and I figured then I would not even want the hassle. I cant imagine being 50, 60 years old STILL on that grind. I dont blame you at all.
