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Renewed1

Renewed1

Well-Known Member
Hi ladies,

Could you please recommend an IR relationship forum? Not really dating sites, but forums where people who are interested in dating outside of their culture can talk and discuss things.


ETA: No offense to anyone, I'm not looking for your personal opinion on IR dating. Just forums. But if you feel the need to add your opinion, because it's your right....at least add a nice comment! :)
 
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What exactly do you need, though? I mean, it's like any other man except for the fact that you won't share the same culture. If you can get over the cultural difference and the random Black man that will have something to say about it, then you'll be OK. Honestly the culture is the biggest thing that takes getting used to. I've dated Black men from other cultures (Caribbean and Middle Eastern) and it took way more effort than dating a White guy from America or Europe. I often forget my last love interests were White. I only think about it when someone asks about dating IR or someone points it out to me.
 
I'm sorry, I'll edit my original post in a few minutes. (It's late, I'm half awake).

But I'm just looking for forums where people who are interested in IR dating can talk and discuss things relating to that subject.



Enyo said:
What exactly do you need, though? I mean, it's like any other man except for the fact that you won't share the same culture. If you can get over the cultural difference and the random Black man that will have something to say about it, then you'll be OK. Honestly the culture is the biggest thing that takes getting used to. I've dated Black men from other cultures (Caribbean and Middle Eastern) and it took way more effort than dating a White guy from America or Europe. I often forget my last love interests were White. I only think about it when someone asks about dating IR or someone points it out to me.
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My advice is don't get caught up in this "dating White" culture some people have created. When I first got asked out by a White guy I went to one of these forums (can't remember the name, it was years ago) and they acted like I was getting ready to go to the moon. It was crazy and none of the advice was useful. Just be open and be yourself. Take each issue as it comes and don't try and predict what will or will not happen. Think of him as a man first and everything else will fall into place.

Good luck.
 
Yea, I'm with Enyo and don't quite understand what information you're looking for. Are you looking for info on how and where to meet white men? Or how to make yourself more approachable to white men? Because beyond that...it's a date.

They're not space monkeys. They're men who you'll find are more alike then they are different (assuming similar socioeconomic backgrounds).
 
:lachen: @ yall not answering the woman's question. OP there is a poster here with a blog about IR dating. Her name is Christyln, you should look her up and PM her. She seems to be the expert in these matters.
 
Syrah said:
Yea, I'm with Enyo and don't quite understand what information you're looking for. Are you looking for info on how and where to meet white men? Or how to make yourself more approachable to white men? Because beyond that...it's a date.

They're not space monkeys. They're men who you'll find are more alike then they are different (assuming similar socioeconomic backgrounds).
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Just forums, like the first post stated. I guess you don't have any suggestions for forums.
 
Changed said:
Just forums, like the first post stated. I guess you don't have any suggestions for forums.
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I'm just warning you that they are a total waste of time. You can take that or leave it, but judging by this thread and all of the questions I've seen you posting, you are really over-thinking this. I've been in the spot where you are and just want to help you. You can take it or leave it.

I know a few sights for meeting people who are open to other races (I met some goodies on Afro-Romance.com), but when you say you want to "discuss the issues" it concerns me because it's a huge sign that you're over-thinking which will make you quick to jump on things that aren't that serious or take everything as a "sign" that your man is doing something. That is a great way to loose a good guy. Talking about history, statistics, and implications for the future are one thing. But being overly concerned about topics that are not that serious is just...a bit much.

Once again, I am only trying to help you. Good luck! :yep:
 
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I wasn't referring to you Enyo. Our conversation started off weird with my original post. I understood you were trying to help. Thank you for your advice.

I just had to edit myself again, so the conversation won't go further than what I wanted to discuss.

:grin: We're cool.

Enyo said:
I'm just warning you that they are a total waste of time. You can take that or leave it, but judging by this thread and all of the questions I've seen you posting, you are really over-thinking this. I've been in the spot where you are and just want to help you. You can take it or leave it.

I know a few sights for meeting people who are open to other races (I met some goodies on Afro-Romance.com), but when you say you want to "discuss the issues" it concerns me because it's a huge sign that you're over-thinking which will make you quick to jump on things that aren't that serious or take everything as a "sign" that your man is doing something. That is a great way to loose a good guy. Talking about history, statistics, and implications for the future are one thing. But being overly concerned about topics that are not that serious is just...a bit much.

Once again, I am only trying to help you. Good luck! :yep:
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Hi Changed! I would say to go here...
http://interracialdatingcoach.blogspot.com/

and any of the blogs listed on the roll on the side should be good.

All that being said, I have to agree with Enyo as well. I didn't post immediately on this thread despite my interest in IR relationships only because I do worry (based on some of the questions I see on this board and others) that too many black women are overthinking the IR dating thing... and by overthinking, they indirectly might be sabotaging some of their efforts to date IR.

Also, on the boards, some of the women have been discussing things for YEARS and still aren't in relationships... even some of the board operators have told folks to get off the site sometimes and get out there and do something! :lol:

Not saying Changed that this will be you at all, and I understand the desire to interact with like-minded people. That's why I visit the boards.

Just don't fall into the trap that Enyo mentioned... honestly, that was my first thought as well when I read the question!

Good luck!
 
Oh I understood what Enyo (and you) are saying. I'm not overthinking the whole IR thing. I just want to visit and talk with others that are like minded (like you mentioned). Read and have intellectual (or not) discussions on dating and marriage from a IR perspective.

Bunny77 said:
Hi Changed! I would say to go here...
http://interracialdatingcoach.blogspot.com/

and any of the blogs listed on the roll on the side should be good.

All that being said, I have to agree with Enyo as well. I didn't post immediately on this thread despite my interest in IR relationships only because I do worry (based on some of the questions I see on this board and others) that too many black women are overthinking the IR dating thing... and by overthinking, they indirectly might be sabotaging some of their efforts to date IR.

Also, on the boards, some of the women have been discussing things for YEARS and still aren't in relationships... even some of the board operators have told folks to get off the site sometimes and get out there and do something! :lol:

Not saying Changed that this will be you at all, and I understand the desire to interact with like-minded people. That's why I visit the boards.

Just don't fall into the trap that Enyo mentioned... honestly, that was my first thought as well when I read the question!

Good luck!
Click to expand...
 
Bunny77 said:
Also, on the boards, some of the women have been discussing things for YEARS and still aren't in relationships... even some of the board operators have told folks to get off the site sometimes and get out there and do something! :lol:
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Oh my, Sr. Bunny. LOL! That's sad and funny at the same time.
 
Enyo said:
Oh my, Sr. Bunny. LOL! That's sad and funny at the same time.
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I know, right?

I was on one black women's IR listserv for a minute just as a lurker. One woman who was supposedly the leader of the group claimed like, three different boyfriends and two fiances in a three-year period. She would be engaged to a new guy every year, and within days of posting an engagement e-mail, she'd ask under a different e-mail why men she would meet online only wanted sex.

Folks were like, "Aren't you engaged?" Silence.


Others were in and out of abusive relationships and the women in general either were NOT dating or dating the most whack white and Asian men ever known to womankind.

I had to leave. It was just dysfunction central.
 
Yes, you really have to watch relationship boards in general. They can be really messed up regardless of their "theme".

I asked my friend about any IR issues he wished to address and he was confused. He said "I mean, some people didn't like the fact that I was married to a Black woman, but I expected that. What issues did you mean?" I had to laugh. I may look at some of those blogs tonight. I'm interested in seeing what the big to do is aside from new couple being spotted and facts/figures being released regarding IR marriages. I heard Asian/Asian marriages are on the rise, which I'm glad about. Poor Asian men. They have been marginalized for a while.
 
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