OTHER PEOPLE PLAYING IN YOUR HAIR AT WORK?

[LdyKamz]

Does this really happen? I sit next to this girl (a white girl if it matters) and when I first started working here she had a chin length bob and 3 years later with no salon visits other than the coloring she's reaching mid back length. Not optimal growth but anyway...a woman comes over by where we sit and she says "my, your hair has grown, it's pretty" and proceeds to play in it running her fingers through it and everything. We're pretty close and I know how she is so we both kinda gave each other the eye like erplexed what the heck is she doing?! This lady tried to do this to me once before when I started wearing a weave as a protective style. "ohhh your hair is getting so long, what are you doing to it" Lucky my sewing skills are nice because the way she was in my head a track or two was bound to fall out! Can't have that at the work place.

Where is this lady from that she thinks it's ok to do this? She's white too if that matters. Maybe it does. Because there's another one here doing the same thing. I just don't get it. I know how people on here are always ready to beat somebody down for touching their hair Does this happen to any of you at work?

 

[LdyKamz]

Only at my job I guess.

 

[MamaBear2012]

It actually happened to me today. I am transitioning and I have my hair in a bun. One of the nurses where I work (mind you, I don't know her) came up to me and said, "Hey, you're a social worker right? Ummm...your hair is thick. What are you going to do to it?" BLINK...BLINK. So she says, "It's beautiful, but you should press it." BLINK....BLINK. Then she runs her hands along the side of my hair talking about, "Whew...girl, your hair is THICK!" Yep, this is a black woman. I couldn't believe it.

But when I was in high school, I hung out with a pretty diverse crowd. The white girls were forever like, "Can you put my hair in a ponytail?," "Can you smooth the bubbles in my ponytail?" They didn't mind people being in their hair.

 

[LongLeggedLife]

I dont have a "work", but yes people touch my hair...grab my braids, Ive never thought of it as a serious matter and dont understand people who do.
Like are you also as bothered by handshakes...someone touching your back or shoulder, someone reaching in for a hug?

 

[TootiePie]

The lady that sits across from me does it once a week, and she is so rough! I try my hardest to be nice b/c she is old but...i really wanna hem her up sometimes.

 

[diadall]

I have one coworker who is and older black lady who likes to touch my hair but when she does its rough. I have resorted to grabbing my hair first when I know she is about to reach. I hate it because I know when she lets go she takes about 6 of my good strands with her.

 

[diadall]

The lady that sits across from me does it once a week, and she is so rough! I try my hardest to be nice b/c she is old but...i really wanna hem her up sometimes.

Is her name Brenda? That is my culprit.

 

[nappystorm]

I had a transitioner turned natural that would touch everytime she see me I usually don't mind hair touching but she annoyed me for some reason.

 

[againstallodds]

It happens. I had a coworker who, without fail, whenever I wore my hair in a ponytail would come over and try to run my ponytail through her hands over and over - she had enough sense to only do this during our lunch break.

I was very comfortable with her and actually didn't mind because she was always gentle with my hair... aside from my BF, she's the only person I've let get away with this lol.

 

[LdyKamz]

I dont have a "work", but yes people touch my hair...grab my braids, Ive never thought of it as a serious matter and dont understand people who do.
Like are you also as bothered by handshakes...someone touching your back or shoulder, someone reaching in for a hug?

lol I don't mind the handshake but are you good with a stranger or someone you work with but don't really talk to reaching in for a hug? That's kinda weird isn't it? Maybe it's just me but I feel like it's the same with the hair. We aren't that friendly no matter how long I work anywhere so why are you touching me at all? Again, maybe it's just me.

 

[Your Cheeziness]

I hit that Neo on them when they go reaching for mine. I don't mind someone touching my hair occasionally - if I know you like that. But, just random folks...pass. I also wonder what else they just randomly touch if you think it's sanitary to be digging all up in folks' scalp.

 

[Damaged but not out]

After school, I have never been in any social situations where, an acquaintance(far less a complete stranger)would think its ok to touch my hair(invade my personal space).

 

[kittenz]

Maybe it is a race thing. I know my peers and I were taught to not let people play in our hair at school. For other races I don't think it was such big deal since they wash/style everyday anyway. My mom would kill me if I came home having let so and so mess up my style for the week. Maybe it's ingrained.

ETA: I had to tell one co-worker earlier this week to stop touching me PERIOD. She straight assaulted me because I wore a dress (I guess she hits when she's surprised) and then she wanted to twirl my 8 month post hair around her finger. Nah boo.

 

[Charla]

People ask permission to touch my hair. I guess it's the look on my face.

 

[naturalTAN]

I hit that Neo on them when they go reaching for mine. I don't mind someone touching my hair occasionally - if I know you like that. But, just random folks...pass. I also wonder what else they just randomly touch if you think it's sanitary to be digging all up in folks' scalp.

 

[Almaz]

I would do a quick reflex and snap her damn finger off she is meaning to pull out your hair and you need to put a stop to it. I am real funny about people touching my hair

Is her name Brenda? That is my culprit.

 

[PinkGirlFluff]

HR Situation. LMBO

 

[yaya24]

Only at my job I guess.

Nope.
I have an Indian coworker that has to "pet" my hair.

She means no harm but I do tell her to give me 50 feet.

 

[MissRissa]

Maybe it is a race thing. I know my peers and I were taught to not let people play in our hair at school. For other races I don't think it was such big deal since they wash/style everyday anyway. My mom would kill me if I came home having let so and so mess up my style for the week. Maybe it's ingrained.

ETA: I had to tell one co-worker earlier this week to stop touching me PERIOD. She straight assaulted me because I wore a dress (I guess she hits when she's surprised) and then she wanted to twirl my 8 month post hair around her finger. Nah boo.

LOL same with me, if i came home and my hair was any different, my moma was on it. i heard on a regular basis, "you bet not let folks play in your hair" but honestly i've had people play in my hair since i can remember. my old manager (a middle aged white man) used to squeeze my buns on a regular basis and says it's so soft and of course i'd always respond with "is it supposed to be hard?". i only mind if someone touches my hair (i wet bun on a regular basis) then proceed to say ugh, and then wipe their hand on something of mine (this also happened at work), or if i oiled my scalp that morning or the night before and it twas a bit greasy, the proceed to ugh and wipe. ummm i dont recall asking you to touch my hair.

 

[PennyK]

I hit that Neo on them when they go reaching for mine. I don't mind someone touching my hair occasionally - if I know you like that. But, just random folks...pass. I also wonder what else they just randomly touch if you think it's sanitary to be digging all up in folks' scalp.

I can actually see time slowing down and someone dodging reaching hands like this. Thank you for this lmao.

On topic though, I believe where you work and what you do kind of come into play too. I worked in fast food during high school and I wouldn't let people touch my hair because we handled food. But at my call center job, I didn't mind if people were being nice and polite with me and gentle with my hair

 

[SouthernStunner]

I dont have a "work", but yes people touch my hair...grab my braids, Ive never thought of it as a serious matter and dont understand people who do.
Like are you also as bothered by handshakes...someone touching your back or shoulder, someone reaching in for a hug?

I dont think its the same....at least not for me. If I shake your hand I can go right to the bathroom and wash it. If you play in my hair I dont know where your hands have been and I cant go right to the bathroom and wash it, meanwhile the thought of where your hands might have been before they touched my hair lingers in my head.

 

[Curlykutie]

I work with a majority of black folks and the woman there wouldn't dare we know better. But I do kept a sock o batteries with me for the fools who think walking up to someone you don't know and sticking you nasty hands in my hair is okay. And I will use it!!!!!!

 

[ladysaraii]

I dont have a "work", but yes people touch my hair...grab my braids, Ive never thought of it as a serious matter and dont understand people who do.
Like are you also as bothered by handshakes...someone touching your back or shoulder, someone reaching in for a hug?

it's an issue of personal space. handshakes and hair are completely different, not to mention, one is socially acceptable and hte hair patting is invasive. And yes, I have issues with people I dont know trying to hug me

LOL same with me, if i came home and my hair was any different, my moma was on it. i heard on a regular basis, "you bet not let folks play in your hair" but honestly i've had people play in my hair since i can remember. my old manager (a middle aged white man) used to squeeze my buns on a regular basis and says it's so soft and of course i'd always respond with "is it supposed to be hard?". i only mind if someone touches my hair (i wet bun on a regular basis) then proceed to say ugh, and then wipe their hand on something of mine (this also happened at work), or if i oiled my scalp that morning or the night before and it twas a bit greasy, the proceed to ugh and wipe. ummm i dont recall asking you to touch my hair.

For a second I thought you were talking about your other buns and I was like

 

[SuchaLady]

People have touched my hair since I was a little girl. It never bothered me and still doesn't.

Sent from my DROID2 using DROID2

 

[MsLi@512]

I have never had this issue with people touching my hair. Maybe I'm not worthy..........YET!(come on BSL)

 

[MsChelle]

I used to wear my hair down all the time but rarely have in the past two years. I mostly wet bun when the weather permits and people constantly poke my bun. I think they thought my hair fell out when I stopped wearing it down and was trying to cover the fact up by not wearing it down. They think my bun is stuffed with fake hair. On the rare occasion I let it down now there are a few that feel the need to touch it.

 

[Miss*Tress]

Like another poster mentioned, I was raised not to let people play in my hair. They used to love tugging my ponytails and when I'd get home my hair would be a fuzzy tangled mess.

This was an issue growing up in the US and the UK but never in Jamaica, so there is definitely a cultural aspect at play with the hair touching.

 

[LongLeggedLife]

lol I don't mind the handshake but are you good with a stranger or someone you work with but don't really talk to reaching in for a hug? That's kinda weird isn't it? Maybe it's just me but I feel like it's the same with the hair. We aren't that friendly no matter how long I work anywhere so why are you touching me at all? Again, maybe it's just me.

As stated, I dont have a workplace (where other people are) so my only frame of reference for this is being in any social situation with people I am only loosely acquainted with. But yeah, I am friendly generally, and find that many people want to be friendly towards me, so I dont mind anyone reaching for a hug or casually touching me if its not done in a perverse/off-putting manner. I dont see it as weird since it happens all the time, plus I'm used to my hair drawing attention.
In fact, thats probably a better reason not to waste energy getting bent out of shape, because people reach for my head or reach in to touch me so often I would be one tense angry **** if this was my pet peeve.

 

[seventiesbaby]

I haven't had anyone play in my hair since I was in grade school. A whoopin took care of all that.

 

[OndoGirl]

Weird, but this happens to me a lot on the job now that I am natural. I guess I don't mind (women only) if we are on the topic of hair or something.