NY NJ CT single ladies...

keelioness

keelioness

New Member
Especially over 30 ..can you all please share where you have met or a good place to meet a mate.. not a jump off, a friend with perks etc.. but a mate.. seems like guys in our neck of the woods who are over 30 and single probably wanna stay that way..please share your thoughts/ experiences..
 
I'm not in your area but I wanted to add something about meeting men.

If you really think about it, most men work at night or on the odd shifts. So while those of us who work 9 to 5's are at work they are probably out and about running their errands and stuff. By the time we get off to run our errands and stuff they are either sleeping or at work. So it makes it a little difficult to meet one (with a job LOL).

Go to your supermarket VERY EARLY in the mornings, especially Sundays or very late at night and you will find the majority of people there are men shopping.
 
I'm over 30 and I've been living in NYC for 13 years. I've learned a few things.... People here are concerned about making money and getting ahead, and then they leave. They're not always looking for love. Is not impossible, but it's rare to find. There are more women than men here so the men can afford to be complete jerks. They will always look for the next best girl. There is always going to be another girl who will take their crap, take less than you will, will allow themselves to be taken advantage of. Men stay single here because they can afford to. There are tons of guys in their 40s who are successful and single and chasing 22 year old tail.

My advice? Keep your options wide open. Don't get sucked into the city vibe. Majority of people in the tri state are rude, self absorbed, fast, competitive. I've never experienced rudeness of this magnitude in any other state, especially from men.

Get online. Go out and do group activities and hopefully you will meet people who share your mindset. Um, keep your options open geographically.... I travel a lot and I've met really nice men in other states. Men don't even buy women drinks in NYC anymore. In any other part of the country, women have the upper hand in dating.

If you can make it here, it's true, you can make it anywhere. And that is a good thing to realize!
 
I got a couple of years before 30 but I don't think there's a special spot. You can meet a mate anywhere. I can suggest a million places but jerks are everywhere. I met my boyfriend in Miami at a water party. The boyfriend before him used to message me on myspace and come to find out we went to the same school and I had never laid eyes on him till myspace.

I'm not heavy into the night life but I've hit up First Saturdays at the BK museum and I've seen some nice looking men. I've gone to a few lounges and they are there. I know there's a speed dating/ date and game thing in Manhattan this Friday. I think a lot of people will be in their late 20's to early 30's. Also, go to weddings if you get invited. People tend to try and invite available people. At least that's how it has been for the last few weddings I've been to.

I know people say you can't meet men at clubs or parties but eh; I say let him take you on a date and see what happens. Good luck.
 
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Stills trying to figure this out myself. I'm meeting men at my dealership when I go for service lol.


Time wise, after 6 I have luck, most men by me long island NY work 9-5. Or go out for lunch.
 
Men don't even buy women drinks in NYC anymore
Click to expand...

this guy asked my friend if she wanted A SIP of his drink....and this was just last week folks. During HAPPY HOUR!!!!! 1/2 off....and u can't buy her a drank?
 
Welp i figured I'd add a guys insight. If you're looking for a relationship, spots where guys pick up girls are the wrong ones. They're aiming flocks. IMO you're better off picking a guy up from his job, in a department store. You know where all my friends are that want a relationship? Work, or in their house or occasionally out with friends or class.
 
LivingDol1 said:
I'm over 30 and I've been living in NYC for 13 years. I've learned a few things.... People here are concerned about making money and getting ahead, and then they leave. They're not always looking for love. Is not impossible, but it's rare to find. There are more women than men here so the men can afford to be complete jerks. They will always look for the next best girl. There is always going to be another girl who will take their crap, take less than you will, will allow themselves to be taken advantage of. Men stay single here because they can afford to. There are tons of guys in their 40s who are successful and single and chasing 22 year old tail.

My advice? Keep your options wide open. Don't get sucked into the city vibe. Majority of people in the tri state are rude, self absorbed, fast, competitive. I've never experienced rudeness of this magnitude in any other state, especially from men.

Get online. Go out and do group activities and hopefully you will meet people who share your mindset. Um, keep your options open geographically.... I travel a lot and I've met really nice men in other states. Men don't even buy women drinks in NYC anymore. In any other part of the country, women have the upper hand in dating.

If you can make it here, it's true, you can make it anywhere. And that is a good thing to realize!
Click to expand...

lol doesn't seem like you like it here much :nono:...I've lived here my whole life with the exception of my first 2 yrs of college..problem is I usually had an S/O seems harder to find one at this age..
 
Hairsnob said:
I'm not in your area but I wanted to add something about meeting men.

If you really think about it, most men work at night or on the odd shifts. So while those of us who work 9 to 5's are at work they are probably out and about running their errands and stuff. By the time we get off to run our errands and stuff they are either sleeping or at work. So it makes it a little difficult to meet one (with a job LOL).

Go to your supermarket VERY EARLY in the mornings, especially Sundays or very late at night and you will find the majority of people there are men shopping.
Click to expand...

This is an interesting take on this whole thing...its funny because most of the men on my job work evenings or midnight shifts...early morn supermarket eh? I'm gonna try this..
 
Work, church-community service activities, town/city-community service activities, gallery openings, sporting events, while tending to your hobbies you'll meet "the right men for you" most likely along the same path.

Just walk up to the single ones you like, smile and say hi. See where it goes from there.
 
LivingDol1 said:
I'm over 30 and I've been living in NYC for 13 years. I've learned a few things.... People here are concerned about making money and getting ahead, and then they leave. They're not always looking for love. Is not impossible, but it's rare to find. There are more women than men here so the men can afford to be complete jerks. They will always look for the next best girl. There is always going to be another girl who will take their crap, take less than you will, will allow themselves to be taken advantage of. Men stay single here because they can afford to. There are tons of guys in their 40s who are successful and single and chasing 22 year old tail.

My advice? Keep your options wide open. Don't get sucked into the city vibe. Majority of people in the tri state are rude, self absorbed, fast, competitive. I've never experienced rudeness of this magnitude in any other state, especially from men.

Get online. Go out and do group activities and hopefully you will meet people who share your mindset. Um, keep your options open geographically.... I travel a lot and I've met really nice men in other states. Men don't even buy women drinks in NYC anymore. In any other part of the country, women have the upper hand in dating.

If you can make it here, it's true, you can make it anywhere. And that is a good thing to realize!
Click to expand...

Girl you said it perfectly! Took the words right out of my mouth. That right there describes the men of NYC to T.

I just turned 30 and have been living here since I was 13. Most of my family lives down south. All my cousins that are around my age are all married with children and they look at me and say all the time "I don't understand what the problem is" My response: I live in NYC thats the problem.

You're right people here are so selfish and too much into their careers and making money. And the men here do know that women out number them and they have plenty of options. Do you know how many times I've heard a man say "The woman I'm looking for will take me the way I am with all my flaws" Really? So basically we are supposed to take you with your mess and live with it!

I'm venting here so yall bear with me :spinning:

When I go down south to visit my fam the men are totally different gentlemen sweet southern hospitality.

OP- Honestly I dont know where to find a good man in NYC or the tristate area cause I'm still looking my darn self. I'll be checking this thread to see if anyone else has some great ideas other than moving somewhere else.

I'm at the point now that if things don't change within 2 years I have no choice but to move if I want to get married and have a family.
 
OT but ladies in CT my Best guy friend is Single... and looking. No kids, owns property and has a great job. and is looking for a serious relationship. Very nice but a little social awkward.
 
Hairsnob said:
I'm not in your area but I wanted to add something about meeting men.

If you really think about it, most men work at night or on the odd shifts. So while those of us who work 9 to 5's are at work they are probably out and about running their errands and stuff. By the time we get off to run our errands and stuff they are either sleeping or at work. So it makes it a little difficult to meet one (with a job LOL).

Go to your supermarket VERY EARLY in the mornings, especially Sundays or very late at night and you will find the majority of people there are men shopping.[/QUOTE]

I have to strongly agree with this, I'm not even actively looking but last few trips where I've gone grocery shopping (meat section in particular lol) I've been approached by some cuties, and I was looking average to torn down; something about knowing a woman showing her domestic side must be an aphrodisiac...
Click to expand...
 
poochie167 said:
this guy asked my friend if she wanted A SIP of his drink....and this was just last week folks. During HAPPY HOUR!!!!! 1/2 off....and u can't buy her a drank?
Click to expand...


:rofl: a sip? Im dead :lol:

a drink has become the new lobster meal. No drink til you drop them draws :lol:
 
tigereyes83 said:
OT but ladies in CT my Best guy friend is Single... and looking. No kids, owns property and has a great job. and is looking for a serious relationship. Very nice but a little social awkward.
Click to expand...

tigereyes83- whats the status update on your friend? I wonder if we should start a sticky for ppl that have friends who are single:spinning:
 
stephluv said:
@tigereyes83- whats the status update on your friend? I wonder if we should start a sticky for ppl that have friends who are single:spinning:
Click to expand...

stephluz.. He is still single. He is just having the hardest time. I know the social part plays a role in this but he is honestly trying. He went on a singles cruise a few weeks back and exchanged phone numbers and nothing ever happened. I feel really bad for him and wish I had more advice for him.
 
tigereyes83 said:
@stephluz.. He is still single. He is just having the hardest time. I know the social part plays a role in this but he is honestly trying. He went on a singles cruise a few weeks back and exchanged phone numbers and nothing ever happened. I feel really bad for him and wish I had more advice for him.
Click to expand...

tigereyes83- awwww maybe i should be his wingwoman since i'm in CT too lol Well i'm single myself :lachen:but i have hooked up others lol
 
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