New *2009* Transitioners Support Thread!

[songbyrd517]

Welcome! Your hair is lovely. I'm like you, in that I get bored easily and don't give things a chance to work with the PJism and all lol.

Thank you! Now if I can just resist the urge to try Wen.... I need to stop reading people's product posts

 

[Whimsy]

Hi Transitioners....glad to see you still going strong!!!

CONGRATS to all the BCers!!!

 

[gradygirl]

I'm in. I have been natural before for a year but I texturized to take some of the bulk out of my hair. It still looks like it did when it was natural and is still very thick like my natural hair was so after my last touchup I was like okay what's the point so I made myself choose to either go back natural or relax bone straight. One mistake I made last time is that I BC'ed too early (At 5 months) and got frustrated because I could not do anything with my hair. I am not sure how long I will transition but 18 months is my minimum.
Good luck ladies and Congrats to all of the recent BC'ers

 

[Eisani]

All of you who have been BCing, you're so brave! I'm a big chicken :superbanana:

Good luck if you do

You say you're a chicken; my head is just too darn big

Congrats to all the BC'ers and best wishes to those still transitioning .

 

[songbyrd517]

I'm in. I have been natural before for a year but I texturized to take some of the bulk out of my hair. It still looks like it did when it was natural and is still very thick like my natural hair was so after my last touchup I was like okay what's the point so I made myself choose to either go back natural or relax bone straight. One mistake I made last time is that I BC'ed too early (At 5 months) and got frustrated because I could not do anything with my hair. I am not sure how long I will transition but 18 months is my minimum.
Good luck ladies and Congrats to all of the recent BC'ers

WELCOME BACK You sound like me!!!

 

[Lyoness]

For those deep in transition[1yr plus] have you found any areas where you have no relaxed ends? Have you changed your regime in anyway to help combat this? or is that pointless and time to snip?

 

[BotanyGrl]

My update:

I'm about to braid my hair in some box braids. I can't keep my hands out of it with my normal styles. Also, I'm still using the same products I used before beginning the transition. Hopefully that lasts because I put myself on a budget and can't buy new products right now.

My family has been really supportive and SO has surprised me too. I know he has a preference for straight hair but when I shared my decision with him... he was very supportive and we had a very open conversation about European beauty standards, hair history, relaxer effects, etc. I need to stop underestimating him.

I'm past the what to do about my hair knotting, matting, and tangling. Finger combing has been a real life saver for me in handling the above. I'm noticing a huge decrease in split ends, breakage, and previous loss of hair that I inaccurately labeled as shed hair. Seriously, combs are the debil.

Last, I've decided I'm in for a long transition. The target is at least 18 months because my shrinkage is ridiculous! It feels like it's such a LONG time away...

 

[Morenita]

Thank you! Now if I can just resist the urge to try Wen.... I need to stop reading people's product posts

My gosh, Wen! I had been co-washing w/it for months and finally tried it as a leave-in the other day. It left my hair ridiculously soft.

You say you're a chicken; my head is just too darn big

Congrats to all the BC'ers and best wishes to those still transitioning .

Lol!

For those deep in transition[1yr plus] have you found any areas where you have no relaxed ends? Have you changed your regime in anyway to help combat this? or is that pointless and time to snip?

I will make one year in a couple of weeks, but no, I still have plenty of relaxed ends. I was APL when I joined last year and decided to transition. Go figure that I had just slapped a relaxer in there after an 8 month stretch I am debating doing a little experiment in my crown or nape area though and snipping them off just to get a taste Oh wait, that may be too tempting though...

Edit: You know...I am almost POSITIVE that if I do decide to transition for longer than 2 years, once I do get to the point where I only have like 4 inches of relaxed ends left, I would just go ahead and snip them. I mean really, wouldn't it just be easier to deal with one texture by that point? It doesn't seem like length would be the issue by that time. I mean for me, (and I'm assuming most other long-term transitioners) the reason for this long haul is b/c I don't want short natural hair.

 

[songbyrd517]

My gosh, Wen! I had been co-washing w/it for months and finally tried it as a leave-in the other day. It left my hair ridiculously soft.

Don't say that Morenita!!!! I'm getting PJ crack attack just hearing those words!



When my husband puts me out for buying another hair product, me and my Wen are
coming to live with you!
I hope you have potato chips there...

BTW, your hair looks SOOOO pretty in your avatar I need to try that...

 

[countrychickd]

Wow, so I've elected to start using Megatek in the hopes that I can speed this transition along, and ladies within two weeks my new growth had grown by leaps and bounds...lol. I just want enough new growth to not look a hot mess, then off with the relaxed.

 

[Lyoness]

I will make one year in a couple of weeks, but no, I still have plenty of relaxed ends. I was APL when I joined last year and decided to transition. Go figure that I had just slapped a relaxer in there after an 8 month stretch I am debating doing a little experiment in my crown or nape area though and snipping them off just to get a taste Oh wait, that may be too tempting though...

Edit: You know...I am almost POSITIVE that if I do decide to transition for longer than 2 years, once I do get to the point where I only have like 4 inches of relaxed ends left, I would just go ahead and snip them. I mean really, wouldn't it just be easier to deal with one texture by that point? It doesn't seem like length would be the issue by that time. I mean for me, (and I'm assuming most other long-term transitioners) the reason for this long haul is b/c I don't want short natural hair.

tbh I've never had a problem with dealing with two textures.. which is cool.. The one year point was fine.. I still have the majority left it was just this one spot! I was hoping to reach apl before I snipped I'm like 1" away.. well I wont make full apl now with my ends dropping off..
Yea your right about wanting length! Which I'm not far off.. I'm definitely doing the preparation shopping.. hair accessories etc so it's definitely approaching!

hehe I guess thats why I snipped too!!

 

[Eisani]

I will make one year in a couple of weeks, but no, I still have plenty of relaxed ends. I was APL when I joined last year and decided to transition. Go figure that I had just slapped a relaxer in there after an 8 month stretch I am debating doing a little experiment in my crown or nape area though and snipping them off just to get a taste Oh wait, that may be too tempting though...

Edit: You know...I am almost POSITIVE that if I do decide to transition for longer than 2 years, once I do get to the point where I only have like 4 inches of relaxed ends left, I would just go ahead and snip them. I mean really, wouldn't it just be easier to deal with one texture by that point? It doesn't seem like length would be the issue by that time. I mean for me, (and I'm assuming most other long-term transitioners) the reason for this long haul is b/c I don't want short natural hair.

You are absolutely right about the bolded. With my hair having been texlaxed and the length it was when I started transitioning (BSL, I believe) I already knew I was in for the long haul but being texlaxed can be deceiving because when I thought I only had a few inches of chemical to cut off, I'm now realizing it's quite a bit more and I can only tell the difference when my hair is slightly damp, not when soaking wet and not when completely dry-weird. Sad part is I didn't really realize this until after I got super scissor happy and maintained MBL for months. Some days I wonder if I just want to go ahead and texlax again to keep my length or just keep on trucking on this transition. I'll see in April how I feel, and again some time in the summer. I haven't had this much natural hair in the summer since I was a little girl and i'm nervous as heck. We'll see .

 

[afrikeys]

I can't access the old 1 so I'm not complaining!! Thanks!! I'm at week 49 .. I'm not finding it too hard, in fact its getting easier..

hi lyoness what regimen are you using to transition? i'm at around 24 weeks (not sure) but I have no idea what to do... i HAVE BEEN USING HEAT LATELY... BUT i HAVE A LOT OF BREAKEAGE.... i DO NOT KNOW WHAT TO DO.. OR HOW TO STYLE MY HAIR,,,
PLEASE HELP

 

[Morenita]

Don't say that Morenita!!!! I'm getting PJ crack attack just hearing those words!



When my husband puts me out for buying another hair product, me and my Wen are
coming to live with you!
I hope you have potato chips there...

BTW, your hair looks SOOOO pretty in your avatar I need to try that...

You're funny lol. Come on over so we can drive my hubby twice as nuts lol. And thanks!

You are absolutely right about the bolded. With my hair having been texlaxed and the length it was when I started transitioning (BSL, I believe) I already knew I was in for the long haul but being texlaxed can be deceiving because when I thought I only had a few inches of chemical to cut off, I'm now realizing it's quite a bit more and I can only tell the difference when my hair is slightly damp, not when soaking wet and not when completely dry-weird. Sad part is I didn't really realize this until after I got super scissor happy and maintained MBL for months. Some days I wonder if I just want to go ahead and texlax again to keep my length or just keep on trucking on this transition. I'll see in April how I feel, and again some time in the summer. I haven't had this much natural hair in the summer since I was a little girl and i'm nervous as heck. We'll see .

I hope you stick with it. I know that you've been going back and forth for a while now. I remember reading some of your posts. I love your hair and want to see you try it natural. You've come so far, may as well keep on going oke:

 

[Morenita]

tbh I've never had a problem with dealing with two textures.. which is cool.. The one year point was fine.. I still have the majority left it was just this one spot! I was hoping to reach apl before I snipped I'm like 1" away.. well I wont make full apl now with my ends dropping off..
Yea your right about wanting length! Which I'm not far off.. I'm definitely doing the preparation shopping.. hair accessories etc so it's definitely approaching!

hehe I guess thats why I snipped too!!

Ah, I see what you mean now about the cutting. I just visited your Fotki. Going to add you as a friend b/c I think you are my HAIR TWIN!!!! I don't have too many pics to compare with in my Fotki, but your hair looks identical to mine from what I saw in that last album. It's funny though because a couple hours after I read your other post I was inspired (or did I conspire with you lol?) to do some snip snipping of my own. It was probably a bad idea b/c now I have a bunch of little hairs sticking up when I put my hair in a pony which is 99.9% of my transition style I am having trouble getting them to lay down and slightly worried about breakage once they grow to the length where they meet my pony band. Anyway, here's what I did. Can't turn back the clock now.

I only cut into about a half inch worth of hairline but still, WTF was I thinking? Love the curlies and it gives me a glimpse of what's to come but... ahhh!

Well if anything, at least I'm cured of the B/C bug for now. Or wait, maybe all I did was make it worse...?

FM is my transitioning buddy, where is she!? Come save me from myself!!

 

[Lyoness]

hi lyoness what regimen are you using to transition? i'm at around 24 weeks (not sure) but I have no idea what to do... i HAVE BEEN USING HEAT LATELY... BUT i HAVE A LOT OF BREAKEAGE.... i DO NOT KNOW WHAT TO DO.. OR HOW TO STYLE MY HAIR,,,
PLEASE HELP

Hiya
I guessed I've been doing the same thing the whole way through with no problems...
I wash once a week over the sink with a jug[sounds so old school].. DC w/o heat [I'm lazy so I'll watch tv and let time pass so could e on for an hr?].. then I shampoo with a shampoo bar.. then I DC again.. I alternate with moisture and protein.. I always wash my hair in sections and detangle with conditioner in my hair , just the once does me.. then I squeeze as much water out as possible and moisturise when wet and seal.. then I do two buns wrapping my hair around itself.. and throw on a microfiber turban..

I moisturise daily [butters/creams/spray depending on season], I comb daily or I get dreadlocks [ yes i do!! lol].. I generally bun daily or use various hair accessories to jazz it up a lil.. I tend not to use heat as I'm worried about damaging my hair.. I have a patch that the texture isn't coming through yet and I've rarely used heat!! so just a warning for ya! I used to do it for length checks and then I realised its the ng I'm interested in so I started comparing that now..

I think thats all.. to smooth my edges I'll use a butter and seal with castor oil as its heaviest of the oils I own and whip on my scarf and bobs your uncle!
I've used alot of random products throughout the journey so don't get too hung up over them as they might not have the same effect on your hair type..[they're all my my fotki] Oh I do add honey and silk amino acid powder to my dc's and I've done 3/4 henna treatments for strength but the washing out did my head in and gave me rasin fingers *sigh*

That was my regime.. with your breakage it could be down to various factors eg the heat or moisture/protein balance..the way you detangle etc.. I'm sure others will hopefully give you more advice!!

 

[Lyoness]

@ Morenita
I'm sorry for laughing but you are brave!! I snipped in the back but at least you can wear head bands and/or use gel to hold them down..and eventually when theyre long enough you could use hair grips...

I must say though your curlies are really cute! Wern't you tempted to carry on? Don't worry I have hair at the side of my hairline that is curly when its wet but once its dry looks like a braid out [similar to your hair does in your albums]..so you'll have a better judge of what it will do then I guess? Experiment!

oh p.s I added ya hair twin

 

[Morenita]

@ Morenita
I'm sorry for laughing but you are brave!! I snipped in the back but at least you can wear head bands and/or use gel to hold them down..and eventually when theyre long enough you could use hair grips...

I must say though your curlies are really cute! Wern't you tempted to carry on? Don't worry I have hair at the side of my hairline that is curly when its wet but once its dry looks like a braid out [similar to your hair does in your albums]..so you'll have a better judge of what it will do then I guess? Experiment!

oh p.s I added ya hair twin

Lol it's ok, I'm laughing right along with you. I do dumb ish like this all the time, ever since I was a little girl. I am sofa king we todd did some times :buttkick:. I keep looking at the picture and going . It's probably not as bad as I am making it out to be but it's driving me nuts. I would have chopped in the back, but that hair is so much longer, It would have been like 8 inches, yikes! erplexed

I'm about to order like 4 different types of gel to see which one works best without so much stiffness, so yeah, that just served to feed my PJism even more. I have Fantasia IC right now, but I foresee myself going through that a lot faster these days haha! It's fine with gel and a scarf, thankfully, but just not quite as slick as I was able to get it before. Maybe I'll try headbands for a bit if gel is going to break the ends off though. I tell you what, I am stepping back up the OCT to grow it faster now My husband saw me in the mirror and you should have seen his face. He thought I was about to B/C lol. He's extremely supportive though. He does not voice his preference one way or the other because he wants me to be comfortable how I see fit.

Edit: P.S. YES! It was tempting to keep going, but it also made me realize I'm not ready to face short hair just yet! I kept thinking to myself, well if this doesn't work out, I can just lop the rest of it off.....






Um, NO! How about I will just deal with it haha...

 

[Eisani]

For those deep in transition[1yr plus] have you found any areas where you have no relaxed ends? Have you changed your regime in anyway to help combat this? or is that pointless and time to snip?

I have areas where I have no relaxed ends. I don't combat it because I want those gone anyway, but I am careful about snipping in other areas so I don't end up super uneven. I've worn a WnG two days in a row and these scraggly ends in certain spots are driving me NUTS. Obviously I don't see them when I'm bunning all the time but this here is a preview of what it's gonna be like in summer which means it's time for a cut, perhaps a good 3-4". I'll get over it.

 

[Lyoness]

@Morenita
The short area will help you decide when your happy to clip the rest off so it, well that's my theory anyway!!
I remember when I was a kid I'd just decide I wanted a fringe and snip snip snip I had a tuft... Loads of crazy moments.. Fingers crossed for the gel [are you planning on using 4 types all at once? lol].. or you could part your hair on the opposite side? you can work with it!

 

[Lyoness]

I have areas where I have no relaxed ends. I don't combat it because I want those gone anyway, but I am careful about snipping in other areas so I don't end up super uneven. I've worn a WnG two days in a row and these scraggly ends in certain spots are driving me NUTS. Obviously I don't see them when I'm bunning all the time but this here is a preview of what it's gonna be like in summer which means it's time for a cut, perhaps a good 3-4". I'll get over it.

ohhh yeh.. I kinda forgot about hair being uneven! I just snipped randomly.... Like you though I bun loads so its no big deal.. Thanks for you expo!

 

[shetara20]

Hello Ladies!!!!!I will be 12 weeks post my last relaxer on tues!!! Im glad I havent managed to put heat in my hair for 5 weeks and my NG is crazy think and im concerned about my curl pattern!!!! I dont know if deal with the thickness ima try to get some cornrows ASAP!!! I feel thats its the only way I can deal just pray for me!!! My roomie is greasing my scalp and she is wooooooooooooooo ooooooooo!!!

 

[Eisani]

I hope you stick with it. I know that you've been going back and forth for a while now. I remember reading some of your posts. I love your hair and want to see you try it natural. You've come so far, may as well keep on going oke:

Aww, gracias mami! I really need encouraging sometimes, we all do

 

[Lyoness]

Aww, gracias mami! I really need encouraging sometimes, we all do

Wow 15months!! You gotta keep going thats amazing.. I know I'm not far off that but I'm not there yet and you are.. your like a rock in this thread!!

 

[CarLiTa]

HELP!!

I am at almost 7.5 months post.
I'm NOT feeling my hair right now. My whole head is super dry

Last time I transitioned, I relaxed after a 7.5 month stretch too, so maybe this is a particularly rough time.

I'm realizing that some sections in the front aren't growing at the same rate as the other parts and that just frustrates me

The first .5" from the crown of my head is like an entirely different texture than the rest of my hair. Last time I transitioned, I assumed it was scab hair, but erplexed it's rough. It looks like a 4a texture (which i have in other parts) but the issue is HOW IT FEELS. it feels so rough! AND it's SHORT. When I pull it down it only reaches a little past my eyebrows. At almost 8 months post, it should be longer, no???

I have a lot of different textures. I have stirrup-size coils at the temples, a size in between stirrup- and pencil in most other sections, and pencil-sized in the back.

I also realize that the back of my hair is growing faster. The other night in the shower, a hair strand came from there and I I realize that it was like 5" long!

I sweat in that area overnight though, so that could contribute to that.

it's great it's growing quickly, but that doesn't match with the front of my hair that's just barely 3" long

anyway, could someone recommend how I can deal with the dryness?

I know I haven't done a deep-conditioning treatment in a long time. I just condition in the shower... but I'm just not sure what products to use with this hair!

I really want to get over this hump!

 

[songbyrd517]

:

I sweat in that area overnight though, so that could contribute to that.

it's great it's growing quickly, but that doesn't match with the front of my hair that's just barely 3" long

anyway, could someone recommend how I can deal with the dryness?

I know I haven't done a deep-conditioning treatment in a long time. I just condition in the shower... but I'm just not sure what products to use with this hair!

I really want to get over this hump!

Hi CarLiTa!!! I am going to answer your question the best I can, but I wanted to tell you this first. Don't be discouraged dear! Though you have not said you are thinking of relaxing, I want to make sure that thought does not cross your mind. My mother always said that anything worth having is worth fighting for, so don't give up, ok!!!
I speak from personal experience. I transitioned and was completely natural for almost 3 years, and then, ever so smartly texlaxed (as I explained in an earlier post). I certainly regret it, and now I have to start over to get what I already had. I don't want you to go through that regret again.

Think of it this way, this is your 2nd time at it. That shows that you truly do desire natural hair. If you turn back now, you may be putting yourself months or even years away from you goals. NOW... let's talk about that dryness.

1. DEEP CONDITION: You said you have not done it in a while. Tsk tsk Your hair needs to absorb the moisture, and the most effective way to accomplish that is with heat. I recommend good old fashioned LeKair Cholesterol - in the JAR not the bottle. If you can find it, just use the normal Cholesterol, not Cholesterol Plus. I don't like that one. The original is more moisturizing, but it is becoming harder to find . If you have a clothes dryer, put a towel in there to warm. If you don't, don't worry about it. Then, mix a little honey and olive oil with the Cholesterol, apply it to your hair paying extra attention to the problem areas and the ends, put on a plastic cap, and sit under a hooded dryer on a medium setting for 20 minutes. Then wrap your head with the warm towel (or, just a towel) and let it sit at least another 10 minutes. If you do not have a hooded dryer, you can put on your plastic cap, and use your hand held dryer to warm your head. Move the dryer in a circular motion around your head swiftly for about 20 minutes. Don't put the dryer too close! Then, wrap in a towel ant let sit at least another 10 minutes. Rinse out with lukewarm water in the shower.

2. PRESERVE MOISTURE: Squeeze excess water out of your hair in the shower with your hands. Then, gently towel dry your hair. Don't rub it, just press the towel into your hair and squeeze the water out. Get your hair to the point where it is just damp - not soaking wet at all. Then apply a moisturizer. I recommend Carol's Daughter Hair Milk, and Carol's Daughter Mimosa Hair Honey. First rub on the hair milk. Gently massage and comb it through. Make sure you get the problem areas and your ends well. Then smooth on some Hair Honey. Put a little on your ends too to seal them. Your hair will smell delicious at this point.

3. GENTLY STYLE: You can style as usual, but to whip your hair into shape, I do not recommend using heat at this time. Try a no heat style, like a braid or twist out. Use a little of a soft hold gel while twisting or braiding, like Fantasia IC Olive Oil Shine Gel. Part your hair (don't worry, the part do not need to be perfect), and put between 6 and 10 (depending on the thickness of your hair) french braids or flat twist in you hair, and set the ends on perm rods. Or, if you can't french braid of flat twit, just do individuals and set on perm rods. You can sit under a warm (not hot) hooded dryer to dry, or tie on a thin silk or satin scarf and let air dry. Take it out, fluff it, and rock it! If you need something to smooth your edges, try Carol's Daughter Kizzi "Stay Put" Hair Pomade. It smells great


Continue these steps for a few weeks, and your hair should soften quite a bit. I hope this helps girlie :blowkiss:

~ Songbyrd

 

[SouthernDimps]

Hello Ladies!

Just wanted to let everyone know that I will be 6 months post this week! I haven't had the itch to relax or BC any time soon

 

[songbyrd517]

Hello Ladies!

Just wanted to let everyone know that I will be 6 months post this week! I haven't had the itch to relax or BC any time soon

Congrats Girlie!!! Keep it up!!!

 

[Carolie]

I'll jump in here with everyone!

I think I'm about 15/16 weeks post.... I forgot exactly when I last got my relaxer ha ha. I decided last month to stick it out & transition without cutting off all my relaxed hair. My head is too big to be going around with hair that short

So far, it has been a challenge but I'm slowly figuring out a routine that works. Rollersetting has so far been my savior but I'm shedding (no breakage, thankfully) a lot right now & I'm at a loss as for what to do to tackle that problem. My hair is everywhere!

 

[princesszmunda]

Wow you ladies have just encouraged me so much!

I have not relaxed since September 2007 but have been wearing sew ins on and off the entire time. At first I wasn't intentionally transitioning, just tired of relaxing and moved to a new place and couldn't find a stylist I liked.

I was still relaxing part of my crown that was outside of the sew in I know, I know, so that part of my hair is now 7 months post so I feel like I have started again.

I had a set back when I left a sew in too long and let a stylist with no knowledge of proper hair care take it out...I could hair my hair ripping....

But now I am on my way...I was having dreams of the creamy crack, but you all have encouraged me to keep it going....fingers, and toes crossed...I am trying to make it to two years b/f deciding if I should stay natural, relax...chop...I don't know.

But knowing I'm not alone is encouraging!