My hair is crunchy and dry as fall leaves *long*

[OnlyErin]

I live in Miami and don't drive. For anyone who knows the area, you know that it puts me at a severe disadvantage as far as hair options. I live in South Beach where the majority of stylists service white and latina clientele or blacks with loose curls - not 4A/B on other words.

So I find a salon that's not TOO far away and that does a good job, and the woman up and moves to Atlanta on me!

I found this out when I booked an appointment for HER (she was gone, and those @&#^ never said a word) showed up, and was told, "So and so will do your hair." So I let so and so do my hair. She burned the heck out of me. I'm serious - I never had scabs so bad. I resolve never to go there again.

Fast-forward to three months later. I have crazy new growth and no stylist. I get a suggestion for a salon. I check it out, all seems well, and I make an appointment. I go, and the woman who is there to do my hair speaks no English. I mean, none. She had to go to the store next door to get someone to translate was I was saying to her. All right, I KNOW I should've turned and left at that point, but I was assured that she did wonderful hair, and I know that many Dominican stylists even in New York have language barrier issues sometimes, so I stayed, vowing that if she made one wrong move, I was out of there.

She parts my hair, spends 30 minutes basing it (which I thought was neat), mixes the relaxer, and begins back to front just the way it should be applied. To make a long story short, she applied the relaxer the best I've ever seen it done by any stylist I ever had.

So why the HECK was my hair still tangled and nappy two days after the service? Better question - why was it tangled, nappy and BREAKING in itty bitty pieces?

I just could not understand it! My hair was dry, brittle and dull, and the roots were like nothing had been put on them! I'm already underprocessed near my ends as it is, and now I have underprocessed hair sandwiching straight hair. Lovely.

I was in a beauty supply/salon looking for a moisturizer or SOMETHING to help the problem, and a nice man helped me find products and mentioned he did black hair and would flat iron mine for free after I told him what happened. He did, and then sort of gasped when he got to the back.

"This woman did not rinse all the product out of your hair. There's still flakes and caked-in parts of it back here BREAKING OFF YOUR HAIR."

So, we got it out as best we could, he had to blowdry and re-iron some parts, and there was so much breakage I nearly fainted. He forbids me to use any protein on my hair because "that will only make it worse." He said I should wrap my hair tonight and tomorrow, wash it Monday and do an ACV to close the cuticle. He said that the breakage isn't as bad as it looked to me, but that he can't tell the extent of the damage until the ACV rinse is done and everything is neutralized. He also said he won't trim it because the roots are so puffy that he might misjudge how much he's taking off. He says a touchup in the a few weeks at the roots only probably won't hurt, but that he'd wait until normal touch-up time to try to re-relax. He was very nice and knowledgeable overall. I wish I'd gone to him first!

I am just so frustrated. I cut out heat, took my Flinstones and Viviscal, did the bun challenge, started Surge-ing, and this is the thanks I get. I really and truly hate stylists right now and I will never touch an Arosci product as long as I live. The relaxer is garbage.

Whew. Ok. I feel better now that I can vent to people who can understand. I tried telling my bf, and he was all

"Your hair looks fine to me."

Darnit. I wish I could've gotten out of work to go to the Miami meetup. I know I could've gotten some immediate help there.

OE

 

[Spagirl]

It's a shame that there are people out there, board certified, that can mess up a head full of hair. You have really gone through more than anyone I know of.

On the bright side, you came across a new stylist that helped you out a little.

 

[aqualung]

Not good.

Well, at least to the casual observer (like your bf) there's no change in your hair. You saved the day by identifying the problem early!

Are there no Miami recommendations near you mentioned on the LHCF salon board? Will the male sylist touch you up at his salon from now on? What relaxer does he recommend for you? Have you a favorite relaxer that you could take to him and ask him to apply next touchup?

Would you consider relaxing at home? This might be the next step in your journey to take responsibility for your own hair. You're a trooper to handle 3 months' of new growth.

I don't like the sound of all this blowdrying and hot ironing you're having to do even though you've got a relaxer. Might rollersetting or wearing wavy airdried styles suite you better? It might be a good preventative measure to keep a bottle of neutralizing shampoo handy at home so that you could jump in the shower right after a touchup and neutralize again. You loose your straight style, but you get peace of mind.

 

[cutebajangirl]

thank goodness you found someone that can help you. I stillthink though that the next time you wash you should use a neautralizing shampoo and an acv rinse. I personally don;t do them but other ladies here can help you as to what point to use the ACV rinse. Then I would do a protein treatment to strengthen up your hair and also to protect it for the future relaxer where he is gonna half to do a pull through because of the underprocessed ends. In the meantime is it possible for you to do wet bun to "hide" the different textures so you can go back to your no heat regime ?

 

[DatJerseyDyme]

Here's a ((hug)).

 

[perfectpeace]

I really don't understand why certain stylists don't take the time to wash the darn relaxer out of the hair. What's so difficult about that? They know good and well that that is what causes thinning hair at the nape. When I went to salons, I used to have to fake it and say my scalp was burning in the back just so they could spend more time rinsing. Well, Im sorry this happened to you. It sounds like this gentleman is very knowledgable and caring, though. I am hoping that he will work out as a good stylist for you.

 

[jetcitygirl]

I'm so sorry this happened to you. I've been there to in my relaxer days. I had a great stylist who just up & dissapeared one day. He had my relaxed hair almost to my shoulder blades which is no mean feat for my fine hair which breaks easily when chemically straightened. Afer he left I went thru a few different stylists and long story short, my hair was back at neck length within a year & half. That's one reason I gave up on relaxed hair. For me it was like playing russian roulette, you never know which one is gonna ruin your hair. Hang in there, if your BF didn't notice anything amiss maybe your hair isn't as bad as is seems to you. Does this new stylist you found do relaxers? Maybe you could try him next time or even learn to do your own touchups as some ladies do successfully here. Go pamper yourself in the meantime!

 

[inthepink]

I'm sorry this happened to you and I hope the advice the other ladies have given to you will help.
jetcitygirl - after my relaxer incident, i too, have realized that for me, relaxing is like playing russian roulette and I don't ever want to have to sit in that chair wondering if I'm going to go home with the hair I walked in with. Just no fun...

 

[MissM]

This is just so, so sad to keep reading about these hair stylists that are screwing up our heads. There is at least what, two posts a week about someone having a bad experience? I feel so bad for anyone who has to go thru this type of crap! What is it gonna take for them to do our hair right? The only thing that I can think of is to watch them like a hawk in the mirror while they are doing your hair. Sometimes I wonder if they are trained to turn the client away from the mirror until their hair is done.

 

[lunalight7]

OE, Im so sorry that this happened...everything happens for a reason though, so maybe this new guy was the one you were meant to go to ....hang in there...your hair WILL bounce back!

 

[aqualung]

[ QUOTE ]
MissM said:
The only thing that I can think of is to watch them like a hawk in the mirror while they are doing your hair. Sometimes I wonder if they are trained to turn the client away from the mirror until their hair is done.

[/ QUOTE ]

I suspect so!

My friend who got a 4-6 inch "trim" last week was turned away from the mirror. I guess it was the stylist's executive decision.

My stylists asks how much I want trimmed off. I look at the shed hairs on the plastic cape to see what he's cutting. (I'm nearsighted, and my glasses are off when he's doing my hair.)

 

[ms_kenesha]

I'm sooo sorry this happened to you, this is the same reason why the hair at my nape had been chewed up for so long, where my head was in the bowl they wouldn't lift it up properly to rinse and neutralize there, in fact there is a term for this type of breakage because it's such a common occurance for stylists to do that!

 

[OnlyErin]

Thanks, everyone. I'm a lot less heated today. Also, my hair feels a LOT better from my treatment with the new stylist yesterday. It's not as straw-feeling or brittle as it was a few days ago, so that's something.

For all who asked, yes, the stylist I spoke to does do relaxers. The thing is, he will only work with the Phytospecific relaxer. He said that he has tried Affirm and Mizani and has not liked the way it breaks down. I asked him about Fiberguard and he says he'll look into it, but that Phyto is a superior relaxer. I'm gonna do some research on the Phyto (starting with this board) and we'll see. He gave me some recs for reputable hairstylists he knows personally if I want to get Affirm put in. That was another thing I really liked about him - he listened and offered options that were good for ME, not his wallet.

I'm now treating my hair with kid gloves, and I'm back in my beloved bun challenge. So far, everything's OK. I'm wavering about whether to get some DRC or go to tried and true Emergencee down the road. I think was ticked me off most, like hairlove and others mentioned, was the feeling of having been played because of one mistake. Haircare is not like dieting where you can pig out one day and probably not gain back the weight you'd lost before. In hair, one slip-up can destroy months or years of work, and it is horrible that it is that way.

OE

 

[Spagirl]

If it's any help my sister and niece love that relaxer but it's expensive. It sounds more and more like he knows what he's talking about. He seems to be the silver lining to your cloud.

 

[pookeylou]

I am sending out my best hair wishes for you...I might even light some candles...

Hang in there...be extra careful with it..If you can stay away from the perms...by all means do so...My sister perms...and she is just now believing me when I say conditioner washes have kept her new growth straighter and flatter than a perm ever could and she is able to go some 14 weeks between retouches...and counting... she was dealing with the breakage too and it has ceased with conditioner washes 3 days a week and deep conditioner once a week.

I am natural...so this next product may or may not help you...but I use Shea butter now on my twist...and my hair is as soft as my baby neices hair...truly soft...

It will get better...hang in there.

 

[Teva]

[ QUOTE ]
jetcitygirl said:
For me it was like playing russian roulette, you never know which one is gonna ruin your hair.

[/ QUOTE ]

Yup that is exactly how I felt when going to get my hair touched up. I kept my fingers crossed and my mind on the good Lord cause I always came out crying and wanting to rip some stylist hands out.

so long for those day...Do your own hair or go natural, that's my advice to you.