My ex didn't like my "ugly ass" natural hair

[NYAmicas]

That's a shame, I saw so many natural wash and gos when I was in Brazil, they had me doing it.
His loss.

 

[cclark1]

ITA! Natural hair isn't every man's thang! My own man, included! And that's cool. To each his own. But your ex was just so rude. And he acted so ignorant! I don't think that this had anything to do with your hair. That fool is just a fool!

I agree because if he saw you for you the hair wouldnt be such an issue

But I do understand if he comes from that standpoint, and so many do on natural hair, he is just ignorant and just wanted you to keep what in his mind is the 'fly look', or the look he is attracted to

but if its more important for you to be natural you gotta do you and leave anyone else by the wayside. Thats with anything and everything, you gotta do what is at the core of you, he will feel stupid if he ever sees you when you have made more progress.....trust that!

 

[AsTheCurlzTurns]

WTH?!?!?! I'mma have to agree with everyone else's posts here. You honestly don't need someone of that caliber in your life, and I'm glad you had the guts to give him his walking papers. I would of told him to not let the door hit him where the sun don't shine! UGH!!!

 

[zzirvingj]

Don't be surprised when you roll up on him in the not-too-distant future and he's all over you and your gorgeous hair THEN

You made the right decision...he is wrong to be so disrespectful, rude and unsupportive.

 

[Firstborn2]

Good for you, I'm glad you had the courage to stand up for yourself and do what is right. Peace and blessing to you.

 

[LadyEuphoria007]

Sorry you had to go through this. Those were some hurtful thinks that he said to you and breakups are tough.

I hope you are healing. {{{Hugs}}}

Non of what he said was true. You did the right thing.

 

[BrooklynSouth]

Good for you..there is nothing ugly about natural, African hair..what an ass"wole"...........

 

[2Cute!]

Pluck him and his mami

No you didn't...

 

[LadyKaypnyc]

I want to his ig'nant behind. I'm glad you that fool to the curb.

You did the right thing by dumping him.

 

[nurseN98]

Wow....ok then. Aren't you glad that part of your life is over with? Now you can find someone who appreciates you as much as you appreciate yourself

 

[Supergirl]

LB,

He's quite a buster, isn't he? I'm glad you BC'ed his dumb butt.

 

[PuffyBrown]

iM sorry. What an A.H! What is the big dang deal about black women cutting their hair short and growing it in naturally. These fake funny bunny people get on my nerves. Like they say if ur light aright if you black than..... I admire you for the way you handled that situation because I really dont know what I would have done. I would have definately called him out on his imperfections and lost all my ladyness....you go girl...

I'm furious. This guy never supported me from the moment I stepped out of my comfort zone to do the big chop, to today when I had my hair out in a messy fro. Instead of commending the progress I've made, the only comments he ever gave were "don't ever cut your hair again," "I liked your hair straight in that weave," "you should wear [extension] braids," to finally "you should straighten your hair. How are you going to wear it the rest of your life? It's not professional. I like it better straight." Oh yeah, he left a voicemail saying he didn't know who would accept me or my "ugly ass hair." I'm pretty sure it doesn't matter how my hair is styled, he won't accept me natural.
FYI, he's a "moreno" Brazilian raised in the U.S.

I finally broke down and told him to get out of my life once and for all. I'm tired of his ignorance. I never meant to stay with him for the rest of my life, but I should at least find a guy who appreciates me for what I am. This incident isn't the only reason, but it definitely upset me a lot. My only regret is that I forgot one of my nice earrings in his car.

 

[Rae1234]

you should read Nappily ever after. for some reason your story reminds me of the book

 

[Candycane044]

You and your hair will do so much better with him out of your life!!! erplexed Guess it proves that the good hair/bad hair meme is still alive and well!

Damn shame.

Cosigning. This is so sad.. I'm glad you got him out of your life. Trust me there are men out there who will love you for you.

 

[QT]

Screw him and the horse he rode in on...... good for you

 

[LilBrownied]

Thanks some more ladies!! That guy truly never did actually want to know or love me for who I am on the inside!

And I will pick up Nappily Ever After. I looked it up-- it seems Halle Berry's going to be in the movie version!

 

[Lucky's Mom]

What a loser.... Luckily you dumped him.

 

[Everything Zen]

Damn was he dating you or your hair?! erplexed

 

[d-rock]

I get especially annoyed to hear black men say things like that. I'm like my hair is YOUR hair fool, just longer. Brainwashed dummy, how is naturally curly hair "unprofessional?" People can't punish you for non-conformity or force your subject yourself to dangerous chemicals to fit one standard of what's acceptable. Let me go now before I get on my soapbox.

 

[Ediese]

So sorry to hear that. I was just chatting with a guy that I dated a couple years ago. I mentioned that I was finally growing my hair, and decided to transition to natural. He said that he's happy because he always told me that I didn't need to wear weaves. Then, he makes this comment verbatim, "I'm not sure about the natural thing. To me, the perm was a great invention. But You grow it and we'll love it." lol I thought that was hilarious.

 

[blazingthru]

The truth is some guys can't handle the natural look. My ex hates my hair and everytime i am around him he makes all kinds of faces as he looks at my hair but makes sure I never ever see him doing it. I hate that --I think that is so disrespectful but its the comments other people make to him about it. you better take your nappy head wife and sit down somewhere or jigga boo or whatever its horrible the names our own people throw at us that the white people said years back-- out in the open sure they still say it but not out in the opening, as far as I know. My brothers thought it was hideous and ugly - they are use to it now but their friends commented all the time about it. Said she looks a hot mess and need to get a perm of course you know they were gay. I can understand him not liking it at first but his first thought should have been, I am going to learn to love it for you, I love you and everything that comes with you. that sounds so easy but sometimes it just ain't. He was wrong to say all he said. he really was --- there is no doubt about it.

 

[MissRissa]

My only regret is that I forgot one of my nice earrings in his car.

Isn't that the worst? my ex has my Boondocks dvds.

lol but yeah, being with someone who constantly degrades you is not the business. good decision making.

 

[Blkprincess]

that's why he is your "ex", don't down yourself, bust open some bubbly and celebrate getting rid of that boy...a real man will love you from the crown of your head to the tips of your toenails. (go post his fickle behind on Dontdatehimgirl.com)

 

[shocol]

The truth is some guys can't handle the natural look. My ex hates my hair and everytime i am around him he makes all kinds of faces as he looks at my hair but makes sure I never ever see him doing it. I hate that --I think that is so disrespectful but its the comments other people make to him about it. you better take your nappy head wife and sit down somewhere or jigga boo or whatever its horrible the names our own people throw at us that the white people said years back-- out in the open sure they still say it but not out in the opening, as far as I know. My brothers thought it was hideous and ugly - they are use to it now but their friends commented all the time about it. Said she looks a hot mess and need to get a perm of course you know they were gay. I can understand him not liking it at first but his first thought should have been, I am going to learn to love it for you, I love you and everything that comes with you. that sounds so easy but sometimes it just ain't. He was wrong to say all he said. he really was --- there is no doubt about it.

I think they can't handle it on a woman. Put that same head of hair on a man wearing a wifebeater, with his drawers showing and pants halfway to his ankles and it's all good.