Meet the ParentS!

[afrofaithful]

So...me and my boyfriend have been dating for a little over a year now. He wants me to go meet his parents in Louisiana! I'm really nervous and don't know what to do! I've met other boyfriends paretns but this is more serious and he pretty much told me this is the deciding factor (in a nutshell you could say). So for those of you with older boys, or those of you who have been in this situation, what advice do you have? What happened, stories, anecdotes, anything will help!!!

Thanks!

 

[Do_Si_Dos]

No advice but good luck!

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[bunnie82]

they say "be yourself"....but then again who are "they" and what does that even mean.....

 

[Iluvsmuhgrass]

I met my SO and inside of a week or so (after we became an official couple.... which was like two months of knowing each other lol) he introduced me to his grandma. I was soooo nervous but I was myself (polite, respectful, etc. which I am naturally so I didn't deter from who I truly am ya know?) Within a few days after that, I met his parents. I was a little nervous but I didn't let it show.

My advice? Be yourself. Understand that you want them to like you but if they don't, it's ok. Keep your eyes open and watch the interaction between him and his parents, between his parents, and other familial relationships. Don't stress and enjoy the trip.

 

[Mai Tai]

Just remain polite, be yourself, and do not weigh an opinion on major family issues (to them, you're still the new girl on the block)

It's hot in Louisiana so wear a cute dress with sandals in the daytime, natural makeup and you should be good. Good luck & keep us posted.

 

[MissYocairis]

If you are going to be staying at the parents' home or even just having a meal there, make sure you offer to pitch in and help his mother bring the food out and afterwards offer your assistance with the cleanup.

If you have dietary limitations (like, you don't eat pork or you are allergic to nuts) PLEASE, you gotta MAKE SURE your SO tells his mom that if she's planning to cook BEFORE y'all pull up. Otherwise, it can be uncomfortable for everyone. Give her time to prepare.

If you are going to be a houseguest overnight, be sure not to sleep late. Get up early and get dressed. Keep your sleeping quarters clean and all of your belongings orderly and put up.

Don't get drunk. Even if they offer you alcohol and even if THEY get drunk.

Don't have sex under their roof. Even if your SO begs til he is purple in the face and comes up with all sorts of excuses as to why "they won't hear us". Don't do it.

Don't follow your SO around. Spend some time with the parents on your own and be relaxed getting to know them. Genuinely try to enjoy their company.

Tell them about your family and upbringing. Be prepared to share your professional and educational goals as well.

 

[hzlcreativity]

Iluvsmuhgrass said it best. Just be yourself, keep your eyes open for how the family interacts with one another, how you feel around them and how they respond to you.

LOL -- I had one aunt tell me: "Junior is a VERY special boy.. are you?!" (She was the 1 crazy aunt...)

Give his family a little grace, because you never know who's who in the family. (I.e. one person being the one who will try and make you lose your cool b/c they're just that way...or the mother being extremely formal b/c she doesn't know you yet -- but she's not that formal/uptight in normal day-to-day life)

Best wishes, and remember, if he's a reflection of his family and he chose you...then they should love you as well!

 

[diadall]

I like C York's advice.

Also, take a nice gift. It does not have to be expensive.

Send a note when you get home.

If you go out make sure you return at respectable hour even if SO says its okay to club it till 3am.

If you go to a store, ask if they need anthything. Hopefully they wont ask for 25 year old scotch. LOL.


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[MissYocairis]

I like C York's advice.

Also, take a nice gift. It does not have to be expensive.

Send a note when you get home.

If you go out make sure you return at respectable hour even if SO says its okay to club it till 3am.

If you go to a store, ask if they need anthything. Hopefully they wont ask for 25 year old scotch. LOL.


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ALL of these are excellent! Esp the bolded. Pure class!

 

[darlingdiva]

I met my SO and inside of a week or so (after we became an official couple.... which was like two months of knowing each other lol) he introduced me to his grandma. I was soooo nervous but I was myself (polite, respectful, etc. which I am naturally so I didn't deter from who I truly am ya know?) Within a few days after that, I met his parents. I was a little nervous but I didn't let it show.

My advice? Be yourself. Understand that you want them to like you but if they don't, it's ok. Keep your eyes open and watch the interaction between him and his parents, between his parents, and other familial relationships. Don't stress and enjoy the trip.

Iluvsmuhgrass and ~Charlotte*York~ gave excellent advice already, so I will simply emphasize the bolded--particularly the latter portion of it. Be polite, friendly, and respectful, but don't try to force them to like you. It would be ideal if everyone gets along because that makes for more pleasant interactions. If they don't like you, though, that is absolutely okay.

 

[ThatJerseyGirl]

@Iluvsmuhgrass said it best. Just be yourself, keep your eyes open for how the family interacts with one another, how you feel around them and how they respond to you.

LOL -- I had one aunt tell me: "Junior is a VERY special boy.. are you?!" (She was the 1 crazy aunt...)

Give his family a little grace, because you never know who's who in the family. (I.e. one person being the one who will try and make you lose your cool b/c they're just that way...or the mother being extremely formal b/c she doesn't know you yet -- but she's not that formal/uptight in normal day-to-day life)

Best wishes, and remember, if he's a reflection of his family and he chose you...then they should love you as well!

hzlcreativity - no his name was not "Junior" lololol..that tickled me.