Love, Honor and ________?

[neenzmj]

Hello ladies:

I posted this under the Relationship forum, but I wanted to ask you all to weigh in, too. My husband and I have begun speaking on the topic of marriage. Our next session is called “Love, Honor and _________? How do you fill in the blank? As a Christian wife, I desire to follow God’s word in all areas of my life. In preparing for our subject (submission)
I still found my feathers getting a little ruffled, even though I receive God’s command to wives. I am thankful that He’s still perfecting me.

 

[neenzmj]

No thoughts from anyone?

 

[Renovating]

Love, Honor, and Obey

 

[dicapr]

Cherish. I heard one someone say that we can't even obey God, why would you promise to obey your spouse. It makes since to me.

 

[chrstndiva]

We discussed it and my husband and I chose to keep Love, honor and obey in our wedding vows.

 

[Sashaa08]

I am not married but my church teaches that in the bible it says for wives to SUBMIT to their husbands and it tells CHILDREN to obey. Most weddings I attend say "love, honor, and submit" or "love, honor, and cherish" but I have been to a few that say "love, honor, and obey."

 

[neenzmj]

I said the word "obey" in my wedding vows and to be honest, I didn't give it much thought at the time. As a Christian, I've always accepted the fact that God commanded wives to be in submission to their husbands, but as we began preparing for this topic, I found my feathers getting a little ruffled. I found out that I wasn’t really feeling this whole notion that someone could just rule over me. I began to do some more research on the husband's role. What I've learned is this: more often than not, the majority of men and women do not understand how marriage was set up to operate in this first place. Though women were commanded to submit, men were commanded to love us with a sacrificial love. Someone wrote a great explanation of how a husband should love his wife. It said, “…you are willing to live for her—to sacrifice your desires for her desires; to constantly serve her and put her needs before your own; to set aside your own preferences, comfort, and welfare to please her and meet her needs.” Who wouldn’t have a problem submitting to a man who loved them like this? Here’s this thing: a man who honors and loves their wife with a sacrificial love can’t possibly control and dominate her at the same time. Unfortunately, there are a lot of men who aren’t ready for this type of love or to be fair, some who are simply ignorant to what a sacrificial love really means.

 

[Shimmie]

Hello ladies:

I posted this under the Relationship forum, but I wanted to ask you all to weigh in, too. My husband and I have begun speaking on the topic of marriage. Our next session is called “Love, Honor and _________? How do you fill in the blank? As a Christian wife, I desire to follow God’s word in all areas of my life. In preparing for our subject (submission)
I still found my feathers getting a little ruffled, even though I receive God’s command to wives. I am thankful that He’s still perfecting me.

To Love , Honor and "Yield", Cleave unto one another; allowing no other to separate us as One.

For to 'yield' is to love, to love is to honor and be it of my will, it is my total submission in obedience to you and our Heavenly Father.

Submission is two-fold: Husbands 'know' how far not to go with his wife.

Is not the husband commanded to 'love' his wife; (Ephesians 5). Is he not warned in I Peter 3:7, that he is to live with his wife according to knowledge, or his prayers would be hindered.

In addition, Precious neenzmj, this (below) I hope will 'unruffle' your feathers.... God always has a 'way' of escape for us'. This will take the 'sting' out of the words, obey, submit.... for it applies to both the husband and the wife.

Marriage is my Ministry and this is in all of my 'Marriage Prayers".... I love it.

Philipians 2:

1 If there be therefore ANY CONSOLATION in Christ, if any comfort of love, if any fellowship of the Spirit, if any bowels and mercies,
2 Fulfil ye my joy, that ye be likeminded, having the same love, being of one accord, of one mind.
3 Let nothing be done through strife or vainglory; but in lowliness of mind let each esteem other better than themselves.
4 Look not every man on his own things, but every man also on the things of others.
5 Let this mind be in you, which was also in Christ Jesus:
6 Who, being in the form of God, thought it not robbery to be equal with God:
7 But made himself of no reputation, and took upon him the form of a servant, and was made in the likeness of men:
8 And being found in fashion as a man, he humbled himself, and became obedient unto death, even the death of the cross.
9 Wherefore God also hath highly exalted him, and given him a name which is above every name:
10 That at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, of things in heaven, and things in earth, and things under the earth;
11 And that every tongue should confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.
12 Wherefore, my beloved, as ye have always obeyed, not as in my presence only, but now much more in my absence, work out your own salvation with fear and trembling.
13 For it is God which worketh in you both to will and to do of his good pleasure.
14 Do all things without murmurings and disputings:
15 That ye may be blameless and harmless, the sons of God, without rebuke, in the midst of a crooked and perverse nation, among whom ye shine as lights in the world;

God bless you and your 'obedient' husband. (Just Kidding)

Blessings upon your Marriage, and your Ministry.

With all my heart,

Shimmie

 

[neenzmj]

Thank you, Shimmie.

After learning more about the husband's role, it become more apparent to me that in God's awesome, wisdom, he set up this tremendous relationship of marriage where both partners end up submitting (yielding), respecting, honoring and loving one another. I thank God that my husband is a man of God who daily strives to live his life as the Word commands. It makes it much more apparent why it is vitally important to be equally yoked. This process of study has helped me learn not to get stuck on the words and the way that we typically think of them, but rather to focus on God's intent in giving us those commands.

 

[Shimmie]

Thank you, Shimmie.

After learning more about the husband's role, it become more apparent to me that in God's awesome, wisdom, he set up this tremendous relationship of marriage where both partners end up submitting (yielding), respecting, honoring and loving one another. I thank God that my husband is a man of God who daily strives to live his life as the Word commands. It makes it much more apparent why it is vitally important to be equally yoked. This process of study has helped me learn not to get stuck on the words and the way that we typically think of them, but rather to focus on God's intent in giving us those commands.

God has chosen a wonderful 'team', you and your 'King', to teach others the true meaning of marriage. It's so needed both in and out of the Church.

Don't be surprised if God uses your Ministry to those of the 'world'. Marriage is still Marriage in and out of Christ and the world needs those such as you and your husband to 'heal' the brokenhearted and set the captives free.

"Dr. Phil doesn't have all the answers, nor does Oprah". God is raising up and sending out those such as you, to shine His light upon the real love between a man and a woman. Be Ready, for 'yielded' you both already are. You're going forth and don't ever be afraid to say it's Jesus. when you speak before millions.

 

[nik4jesus]

All I can say is Yay and Amen..I am learning to RESPECTFULLY SUBMIT and have noticed that my husband GLADLY LOVES when i do. I have also learned not to give to get but to give to the glory of God...not that this is ez but it keeps bitterness @ bay and keep my priority on God not my husband. Thank God for His Word which is always true...even when me in all my wisdom think I have a better way-LOL