kinky twists, braids, <compliments..

[femmemuscle]

Okay, to help my hair get back on track, i wore kinky twists and braids for about 1 year. i have 4b hair, thus, i figured, i might as well stick to my "natural" hair texture.

I didn't receive as many compliments on the job, or by patients, or in the streets/gym until i opted for a afro kinky curly weave.

it has more of a 3b hair texture.

All of a sudden, people are walking up, and saying how "pretty your curls" are. or "I like this style much better on you"..My supervisor: "this style is so much more professional looking" (she's from Africa).

even at work, patients seem last apt to file a complaint about my appearance as they have in the past.

Is 3b/a a more acceptable than 4b hair?

 

[Charz]

even at work, patients seem last apt to file a complaint about my appearance as they have in the past.

Are you serious? A complaint about how your hair looked, a written one? erplexed

 

[Ramya]

To many people yes it is.

 

[Nonie]

Okay, to help my hair get back on track, i wore kinky twists and braids for about 1 year. i have 4b hair, thus, i figured, i might as well stick to my "natural" hair texture.

I didn't receive as many compliments on the job, or by patients, or in the streets/gym until i opted for a afro kinky curly weave.

it has more of a 3b hair texture.

All of a sudden, people are walking up, and saying how "pretty your curls" are. or "I like this style much better on you"..My supervisor: "this style is so much more professional looking" (she's from Africa).

even at work, patients seem last apt to file a complaint about my appearance as they have in the past.

Is 3b/a a more acceptable than 4b hair?

I am not sure that liking your hair worn out had anything to do with its texture at all. (I'll explain in a bit.)

Indeed a lot of black ladies love type 3 hair because of the ease of caring for it and it just seems easier to style "wet, shake and go" while 4B takes a little more work and knots/tangles easily if worn out much.

But I think majority of other people don't care so much about texture as they care about style. I know when I wore my hair in a puff, I got more kudos than when I wore it in twist styles that I thought were so cute. Only a few people complimented my twists, but when my 4B hair is worn out, everyone begs me to wear it more like that. And I'm not talking about the one time I wore it a bit stretched so had a nice sized puff. I'm talking about the time I wore it in a shrunken puff that I wasn't too crazy about. Even my boss walked up to admire it and said it's the cutest do he's ever seen me wear.

When hair is braided or twisted, unless you're really into hair, it's hard to see the texture anyway.

 

[LaBelleLL]

Yeah I think twists are received differently. I don't get nearly as much attention as when my hair is straight, tied up to a high bun or ponytail.

 

[LoveisYou]

How were you styling your natural hair?

This statement is not aimed at you OP

I've noticed that SOME people think that because they have natural hair, they do not have to do anything to their hair. I'm sometimes appalled at people who basically wake up with a ball of knot on their head and leave the house like it's all good. I can't help but think, "Are they for real?"

Seriously, even with relaxed hair, no sane person wakes up with their hair standing up all over their head and walks out the house like that.

Most people, imo, appreciate well kept hair - relaxed or natural.

If you're hair looks unkempt (relaxed or natural) ppl. will talk.

At the same time I do understand that some backwards folks have a negative perception of natural hair. To that I say take care of yours and don't seek their validation.

 

[Lucky's Mom]

Complaints??????????????? oh boy.........

 

[Nonie]

even at work, patients seem last apt to file a complaint about my appearance as they have in the past.

I misread this part the first time and thought you meant complaint about work issues. Wait....they filed a complaint about your hair? Oh for heaven's sake! Saying what, pray do tell!?

 

[femmemuscle]

I misread this part the first time and thought you meant complaint about work issues. Wait....they filed a complaint about your hair? Oh for heaven's sake! Saying what, pray do tell!?

WELL girl.. I'm just kidding!!


i have to agree with you ladies on the kinky twist thing. for some strange reason, people relate to "braids" ("like Bo Derrick"), or cornrows. I'd hate to see what would have happened if i had worn dreads.



i wore the kinky twists for about 6 months. The problem with the braids and twists is this. I never wore gel to keep my nappy edges down.

Thus when my new growth came in, i wore it like a "Badge of Honor". Those naps stood at attention. and was usually the first thing most folks noticed.

thus the formal - yes formal complaints were:

AA patient: "She looked like she just came off the streets."

(no one wears lab coat/scrubs stethoscopes on the streets).

"Her hair looked "scary" to my little girl" NOW, when the kids show up, they want to play in it.

When i was addressed jokingly as "girl, blah blah" by an AA patient, and responded in kind, she was fine - until the results came back. Then i had a formal complaint:

"She addressed me as one of her street friends."

"Her hair does not look professional."

When i casually talked to one of my white radiologist co-horts? his response was: "Well, your haird DOES look scary to some people.

I'm a big fan of Eco styler or IC fantasia gel, today. I'm not sure if the patients didn't like my 4b new growth edges or just naps in general.

But i will say this. Since may/ 09..No complaints.

Same demeanor, same behavior, same clothes, and no complaints.

 

[Nonie]

^^ Those comments! You sho do come across some forward and rude people!

Do you have pictures of the look you were sporting? I'm getting all sorts of mental images approaching that of the homeless man's matted hair we've all seen before.

 

[brucebettye]

How long did you keep your twist or braids in? Because my sister in law would leave her braids in for so long that they would look really bad. She would leave them in for like three months without rebraiding the front or sides. Did you do that? Just asking.

 

[naturalmanenyc]

Did you speak with anyone is HR about the complaints? I'd call that a hostile work environment.

WELL girl.. I'm just kidding!!


i have to agree with you ladies on the kinky twist thing. for some strange reason, people relate to "braids" ("like Bo Derrick"), or cornrows. I'd hate to see what would have happened if i had worn dreads.



i wore the kinky twists for about 6 months. The problem with the braids and twists is this. I never wore gel to keep my nappy edges down.

Thus when my new growth came in, i wore it like a "Badge of Honor". Those naps stood at attention. and was usually the first thing most folks noticed.

thus the formal - yes formal complaints were:

AA patient: "She looked like she just came off the streets."

(no one wears lab coat/scrubs stethoscopes on the streets).

"Her hair looked "scary" to my little girl" NOW, when the kids show up, they want to play in it.

When i was addressed jokingly as "girl, blah blah" by an AA patient, and responded in kind, she was fine - until the results came back. Then i had a formal complaint:

"She addressed me as one of her street friends."

"Her hair does not look professional."

When i casually talked to one of my white radiologist co-horts? his response was: "Well, your haird DOES look scary to some people.

I'm a big fan of Eco styler or IC fantasia gel, today. I'm not sure if the patients didn't like my 4b new growth edges or just naps in general.

But i will say this. Since may/ 09..No complaints.

Same demeanor, same behavior, same clothes, and no complaints.

 

[femmemuscle]

^^ Those comments! You sho do come across some forward and rude people!

Do you have pictures of the look you were sporting? I'm getting all sorts of mental images approaching that of the homeless man's matted hair we've all seen before.

nope, i only kept the kinky twists in for 6 weeks at a time. To others, as well as my boyfriend, i was told, "the longer they stay in, the better they look." but i really pride myself on looking professional, so i always stayed on time with my appts.

With the cornrows, i kept them in for 1 month. When i first went natural, i was very self conscious of my new growth. and i hated seeing cornrows on top hair. it looks tacky.

I work in a very "white" environment. And many patients haven't been around "naturals" very much. Most AA's in this area are relaxed.

One in particular who works in one of our other clinics, has WL hair (relaxed, of course), said if she saw one nap on her head, she's running to the beauty parlor quick-fast-and in a hurry for a retouch.

Wow...

 

[femmemuscle]

Did you speak with anyone is HR about the complaints? I'd call that a hostile work environment.

These patients are rich, and well cared for. They would never tell ME how they felt.. these complaints are written and sent in to our Customer Quality Assurance department.

And when it comes to the patient's opinion. the customer's always right.

It is something that is written by the patient, not the co-workers. The company won't touch this with a ten foot pole. All they want is the patients' money.

I bet when i wore this weave, Customer Quality Assurance must have breathed a sigh of relief.

 

[MizzBrit]

wow that crazy..guess it depends on your environment..
cuz white girls always pattin my puff

 

[UGQueen]

wow, thats crazy.. im very shocked i mean i grew up in europe but ive never heard of anything like this.

 

[femmemuscle]

wow that crazy..guess it depends on your environment..
cuz white girls always pattin my puff

oh, i'm sure they are MizzBrit!

One day, when i get my shoulder length hair back, i'll be sporting a puff, too. But until then, i'll have to wait and weave. Right now, i have enough to pull back into a small puff, but i would have to pull tight to keep hair from sticking out. (not good for the edges). i'll give it a few more years.

Afro puffs are beautiful!

 

[femmemuscle]

wow, thats crazy.. im very shocked i mean i grew up in europe but ive never heard of anything like this.

Wow! Europe! sounds like a wonderful experience. i'm here in CA. They can be racist, but they are just more subtle about it.

Working in Northern CA, or aka the Bay area, has been an eye opener. You have quite a few prestigious universities and places of higher education here. Many rich people from India, and asia flock here to live in the area, and send their children to what they consider the best. (Stanford, UCSF, UC Davis, etc.)

what they don't even consider is this: There are races that live here that aren't white, asian and indian. What's worse, most people from their countries who are less fortunate, are treated like servants or worse. They take on this same attitude when they come through our doors.

What's worse, the AA's that are patients here - are worse than any of these cultures.

 

[lilsparkle825]

I have never heard of any type of formal complaints addressing hair texture, of all things, and I am sorry you had to experience such foolishness.

For whatever reason, I am sure many people associate 3b with being more presentable than 4b. It more than likely goes back to that good hair/bad hair thing many of us are unfortunately taught (and fight like hell to overcome as adults). Heck, my twistouts get way more compliments than my WNGs, so I can definitely see a sew-in being more "acceptable" than twists. Knowing myself and my propensity to "get even", I'd file a lawsuit, but I know not all people are as bold as I am. I just hope that things get better as your patients develop a closer relationship with you.

 

[anon123]

They filed complaints that your braids and kinky twists were unprofessional or scary? Even the manager from Africa (which country is she from?) said the braids were not professional? I am really surprised. Braids and now their close cousins kinky twists are really standard among black people. In the few African countries I've been to, I'd say they are more popular there than here. What a shame.

 

[femmemuscle]

I have never heard of any type of formal complaints addressing hair texture, of all things, and I am sorry you had to experience such foolishness.

For whatever reason, I am sure many people associate 3b with being more presentable than 4b. It more than likely goes back to that good hair/bad hair thing many of us are unfortunately taught (and fight like hell to overcome as adults). Heck, my twistouts get way more compliments than my WNGs, so I can definitely see a sew-in being more "acceptable" than twists. Knowing myself and my propensity to "get even", I'd file a lawsuit, but I know not all people are as bold as I am. I just hope that things get better as your patients develop a closer relationship with you.

thank you! that would be a pretty cool lawsuit. unfortunately, these "monied" people, can complain about the most silliest things.

One of them filed a complaint that one of the mammographers "wasn't compressing hard enough". I was shocked that the poor mammographer "was counseled" about this. the customer's always right.

as for the patient relationship. Since working in this type of environment. I don't think i'd want to get close to at least 80% of these people. One minute they're nice, and out of nowhere - there's a complaint.

My main objective is to get in there, make a difference - cover my butt and go home.erplexed

 

[femmemuscle]

They filed complaints that your braids and kinky twists were unprofessional or scary? Even the manager from Africa (which country is she from?) said the braids were not professional? I am really surprised. Braids and now their close cousins kinky twists are really standard among black people. In the few African countries I've been to, I'd say they are more popular there than here. What a shame.

We have two supervisors from Africa. i know one is from Ethopia. She has a 3a hair type. The other one has naturally long, fine, straight hair.

The one with the 3a hair, is constantly flat ironing it. thus, i can understand their aversion to naps.

When i started wearing the curly weave -they BOTH came into the room and started the compliments. They still do it, from time to time, even touching the hair to see how soft it is.erplexed

i agree, it is a shame.

 

[Meli-Melo]

That's a real shame. I've had a few job interviews lately and I always wear a straight wig because I'm scared of the reaction they might have to natural hair. I wish I didn't feel that way but reading stories like these doesn't help.