Is this appropriate behavior?

Ladies,

You're dating someone you really like (nothing serious, just a kiss here and there.) The second time seeing this person, you introduce him to a girlfriend. He extends his hand to greet your friend and exclaims 'wow, she's cute!' about your friend as you're standing by.

How do you feel about that compliment/comment to your friend?

I'd agree! All my friends are beautiful :yep:

And to be honest, since it's early in the game, I'd ditch him quick if I felt that he wanted one of them. I have plenty of beautiful friends and all the dudes who have stepped to me still get with me anyway :lol:. None of my close friends would go for it anyway. We have a "you like him, you got him" type of thing.
 
Let's back up though...
It's not about him trying to get with the friends at all it's more about demonstrating that you are noticing another woman other than her! They met virtually btw.

I'd say he could have:
1) Tell her in private or
2) Keep it to himself
 
Let's back up though...
It's not about him trying to get with the friends at all it's more about demonstrating that you are noticing another woman other than her! They met virtually btw.

I'd say he could have:
1) Tell her in private or
2) Keep it to himself


I'm confused...:perplexed.

Who met virtually?

And if he noticed another woman so what? He didn't lose his sight when he met her.

Did she feel disrespected or is she jealous?
 
I'm confused...:perplexed.

Who met virtually?

And if he noticed another woman so what? He didn't lose his sight when he met her.

Did she feel disrespected or is she jealous?

virtually=The couple...
Noticing the other women is not the issue though. Should he have said that? Could he have kept it to himself? How does he think the person he is with MIGHT feel? IDK...

She didn't feel disrespected at all. It's more the friend that felt :look: some kind of way about it....
 
You guys may hate me for this....maybe I shouldn't post... (lol) That's okay. I deleted it.
 
I dunno. If I'm dating someone and it's in the early stages of courting, he should be trying to impress me. That includes showing me how he only has eyes for me, is the right man for me, etc. He's auditioning.

I would feel some type of way if a guy who's supposed to be courting me complimented my friend with such enthusiasm in front of me. Maybe that's just me. *shrug*
 
virtually=The couple...
Noticing the other women is not the issue though. Should he have said that? Could he have kept it to himself? How does he think the person he is with MIGHT feel? IDK...

She didn't feel disrespected at all. It's more the friend that felt :look: some kind of way about it....


ok....gotcha!!

Well, he may lack tact and could be inconsiderate but IDK if it's a big deal.

If the friend felt uncomfortable then I'd let him know that he made her fell uncomfortable.
 
ok....gotcha!!

Well, he may lack tact and could be inconsiderate but IDK if it's a big deal.

If the friend felt uncomfortable then I'd let him know that he made her fell uncomfortable.

ITA!!!
Not a big deal but def. lacking something lol

lana
Share, share, share!!!
 
That's happened to me before and I replied with ''go ask for her number then...''

Then he laughed nervously, and I continued with ''no, I'm serious. Why are you speaking to me? ''

I find that ish extremely offensive. It's not that I'm naive to believe my SO/DH will NEVER find another woman attractive. But it's the lack of respect for me that is unforgivable.

That ish does not fly with me. If you're with me... you're with me. Don't comment on my friends and give them compliments. I'm sorry but I'd be a fool to let my man say that and stand by him.

That is definitely a WTF moment for me... and I'd drop him quickly after that.
 
Not feeling that either. Not that they dont notice stuff....but the tactlessness of it all.

I meet one of his male friends and the first thing I do after shaking his hand is go "wow, he's cute" HE AND HIS FRIEND should look at me sideways...
 
Although this isn't about me IF it were, I wouldn't have a problem with it. I've dated men who thought my friends were pretty. Something about exclaiming it, in the presence of the woman your courting seems risky.
 
Met online, second date? Over and out! I wouldn't say that about his fine arse friends and I would expect him to act accordingly.
 
Well, I might feel some kind of way about it. It really would depend on the tone and inflection in his voice. If he was really enthusiastic and a bobblehead doll with it, then I'd be a little miffed, but if he was just remarking, then I'd probably not see it as a big deal, but I'd watch him a little more closely.

I think it's the timing that makes it seem inappropriate. An established SO would get more leeway than just a guy I'm casually dating making the same comment.
 
Inappropriate. He could've told you after and in private if it was that necessary.

I wouldn't say that to his friend in his presence because of the mutual respect I'd assume we'd have for each other, therefore I'd expect the same from him.
 
That's happened to me before and I replied with ''go ask for her number then...''

Then he laughed nervously, and I continued with ''no, I'm serious. Why are you speaking to me? ''

I find that ish extremely offensive. It's not that I'm naive to believe my SO/DH will NEVER find another woman attractive. But it's the lack of respect for me that is unforgivable.

That ish does not fly with me. If you're with me... you're with me. Don't comment on my friends and give them compliments. I'm sorry but I'd be a fool to let my man say that and stand by him.

That is definitely a WTF moment for me... and I'd drop him quickly after that.
I agree. Very disrespectful.
 
That's rude and disrespectful. Why doesn't anyone take relationships serious anymore? I don't care how early it is in the relationship. I trusted you and liked you enough to introduce you to my friend and you over there telling me that basically she looks good and your attracted to her. Red flag.
 
Kissing already? No physical contact until you know he's into you and only YOU. He's playing with you, waiting on someone "better.":nono: Also, he's trying to get some eventually. Trust me on that.
 
Depends on his personality. My guy would get 12000 side-eyes for this. My brother, well he compliments everyone and he's been committed for abt 4 years at age 21. Depends on the person.
 
I think it's inappropriate and inconsiderate/tactless for a guy you are casually dating, a guy you're exclusively dating, your boyfriend, your husband, your baby daddy, etc. to make a comment like that IN FRONT OF you.

Please believe that if you think your friends are gorge, he does too... but he doesn't need to make a proclamation about it the way he did in the OP's scenario.

Honestly though, why is she introducing him to her friends so early in the game anyway? Big no-no.
 
Hell if I were the friend and the person/chick he was with I would have felt kinda awkward. He could have saved that comment for later and to himself. Not saying he cannot find another and any woman attractive but his timing wasn't right. I'd give him the side eye and I probably wouldn't date him because he needs some home training. IMO
 
Back
Top