Is there a reference in the Bible

LondonDiva

New Member
That says anything about marrying for the WRONG reasons other than love. Or something along the lines of marriage being scared and NOT to be taken lightly.

It's for a friend she needs a wake up call.

Thanks in advance.
 
Genesis 1 21-24

21 So the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and while he slept took one of his ribs and closed up its place with flesh; 22 and the rib which the LORD God had taken from the man he made into a woman and brought her to the man. 23 Then the man said, "This at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man." 24 Therefore a man leaves his father and his mother and cleaves to his wife, and they become one flesh.

These verses explain the dignity and sacredness of marriage. That is all I could think of at this moment.
 
sbg4evr said:
Genesis 1 21-24

21 So the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and while he slept took one of his ribs and closed up its place with flesh; 22 and the rib which the LORD God had taken from the man he made into a woman and brought her to the man. 23 Then the man said, "This at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man." 24 Therefore a man leaves his father and his mother and cleaves to his wife, and they become one flesh.

These verses explain the dignity and sacredness of marriage. That is all I could think of at this moment.

For some odd reason I found this to be extremely beautiful.
 
I call Corinthians the Marriage part of the book. It makes mention of how to treat your mate in a marriage.

I don't see or haven't read or come across any stories in the bible where people just got married to get married. Marriage is a very serious commitment in God's eyes as it is reflective of the convenant that God has with his bride, which is us the church (memebers of Christ).

Therefore, they are bonded for life.Afterall we are instructed to continue to Love the One We Marry not Marry the One We Love. As love is not a feeling but a commitment to loving and serving the person forever.


The only thing I can honestly think of is where God says it is better to marry than to burn with passion, but this is only in the case where the two people cannot "control" themselves assuming they are in love.Otherwise, if two Chrisitans are marrying just to have sex, this type of marriage will not usually last as there is no real substance there.

Corinthians 7:9 - But if they cannot contain, let them marry: for it is better to marry than to burn.

I also found this in where God instructs it is not good to marry in this scenario in Matthew 19:9-10. His disciples say unto him,And I say unto you, Whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery If the case of the man be so with his wife, it is not good to marry.

Other than that you can see Jesus teaching in the gospel to not get a divorce unless the reason is adultery.

Above all, assuming your friend is saved and her significant other, they should be praying to make sure that it is God's will for the both of them.

HTH,

Janice
 
Janice they are both saved however she told me today that her ex resurfaced in her life (not physically) he lives in Africa, born in the US. He's engaged as is she. She's not in love with her fiancee but loves him and is going to marry him as she can't face being the 'evil doer' in her family's eyes by breaking things off with him. She told me that she's in love with her ex as he is with her. I told her that they need to be together if they are so in love and marry each other, but her ex will lose out financially from his father if he doesn't marry this girl in Africa. It's so soap opera drama-esque.
 
LondonDiva said:
Janice they are both saved however she told me today that her ex resurfaced in her life (not physically) he lives in Africa, born in the US. He's engaged as is she. She's not in love with her fiancee but loves him and is going to marry him as she can't face being the 'evil doer' in her family's eyes by breaking things off with him. She told me that she's in love with her ex as he is with her. I told her that they need to be together if they are so in love and marry each other, but her ex will lose out financially from his father if he doesn't marry this girl in Africa. It's so soap opera drama-esque.


Oh Lord, Sounds like trouble to me. Is the ex saved? This could also be a lie from the devil, bringing the ex into her life when she is supposedely going to get married. Or it could be God , who knows. This situation calls for heavy prayer and fasting.

Was she ever in love with her current fiance and then changed her feelings when her ex resurfaced?

Well there is still time before either one of them ties the knot. I would highly advise she not get married until she is clear on whom the Lord has set for her to marry.
 
Yes the ex is saved also, all 4 individuals in this equation are saved. If she goes ahead and marries next year I cannot attend this wedding if she feels the sme way. She's settling as if this man is the last on earth. I don't think she was ever in love with her fiancee. She has always and will love her fiancee she told me. They've agreed to keep in contact at least once a week, i've told her she's already begun cheating on her man and that if they continue to speak once married and continuing this back and forth declaring their love for another then that in itself will constitute as adultery. She's so clueless right now. I really want to smack her but I'll have to pray for her instead.
 
Also she told me that before the ex resurfaced she had doubts about the marriage. Just last week I told her that the ex would contact her again before the wedding and this would cast doubt in her mind, bear in mind the ex hadn't contacted her since May of last year and previously 2 years before that, but I just know and knew deep down this guy is not the one she's supposed to marry I always said it was the ex. Anyways she prayed to God to send her a sign that she was doing the right thing about marring this guy. She got a call last week for where they were going to have their reception and the had to cancel their wedding and gave them back their deposit due to renovation and then on Saturday the ex calls her. I said from my point of view they seem liks sure enough signs to me, and yes it could either be the devil or God but you just know when it's God speaking to you, as she said she seemed a little dense so asked God to send her another sign just to make sure she heard him right the first time. What do you think? I personally don't interfere but in this instance I'm going to do everything i can to make sure she doesn't marry this guy unless she's sure that a) she's in love with him and wants to spend the rest of her life with him and b) that she gains some closure on the ex once and for all before moving on with the fiancee and that she ceases contact with him. Otherwise it's going to be a disaster. She's also prepared to marry this guy and see it through till death do us part as she doesn't believe in divorce. What planet is my girl on?
 
Yeah doesn't sound good. I personally don't think either her or her ex should be dragging those poor people along with them while they figure things out. Its selfish and they need to be releasd. Marriage in this case is a big no-no.

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not selfseeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
1 Corintians 13:4-7
 
Tell her to fast and pray about it, and also if she hasn't already done so, she needs to tell her current fiance. She needs to tell him of her contact with her ex and what is going on in terms of her feelings for this man...and be totally honest. It is not going to be easy but It is not fair to him.

She looks like she needs strength to break this thing off, if it is indeed God's will but can't since her fiance may be a sweet man. But if she gets married and continues to keep in contact with her ex, who knows what will happen. I would rather her break it off with this guy then to probaly break his heart by cheating on him. Because if she gets married to him and still has feelings that is alreay considered adultery in God's eyes. The sinful act always begins with a thought.

Above all, let God guide her. Feelings aren't reliable sources since they tend to change. Above all pray.








QUOTE=LondonDiva]Also she told me that before the ex resurfaced she had doubts about the marriage. Just last week I told her that the ex would contact her again before the wedding and this would cast doubt in her mind, bear in mind the ex hadn't contacted her since May of last year and previously 2 years before that, but I just know and knew deep down this guy is not the one she's supposed to marry I always said it was the ex. Anyways she prayed to God to send her a sign that she was doing the right thing about marring this guy. She got a call last week for where they were going to have their reception and the had to cancel their wedding and gave them back their deposit due to renovation and then on Saturday the ex calls her. I said from my point of view they seem liks sure enough signs to me, and yes it could either be the devil or God but you just know when it's God speaking to you, as she said she seemed a little dense so asked God to send her another sign just to make sure she heard him right the first time. What do you think? I personally don't interfere but in this instance I'm going to do everything i can to make sure she doesn't marry this guy unless she's sure that a) she's in love with him and wants to spend the rest of her life with him and b) that she gains some closure on the ex once and for all before moving on with the fiancee and that she ceases contact with him. Otherwise it's going to be a disaster. She's also prepared to marry this guy and see it through till death do us part as she doesn't believe in divorce. What planet is my girl on?[/QUOTE]
 
Wrong attitudes toward marriage... Matthew 5:31-32

God doesn't want everyone to marry... Matthew 19:10-12

Don't avoid marriage for the wrong reasons... Matthew 19:12

Jesus speaks about the purpose of marriage... Mark 10:2,5-9

Paul's lessons about marriage... 1 Corinthians 7:7,32-34,38

Don't assume you married the wrong person... 1 Corinthians 7:17

Problems that marriage will not solve... 1 Corinthians 7:28

How should a man love his wife?... Ephesians 5:25-33; 1 Peter 3:7

Hope these scriptures help in some kind of way. Make sure you read some commentaries on these passages as well to get a better understanding. God bless!
 
This is so interesting, b/c the same situation is going on with a sister at my church and we were discussing it with her this weekend. You know whats interesting is that the bible never really combines love and marriage in the sense that we normally see it. Others on this board have listed excellent scriptures regarding how serious God takes marriage, and how serious we should take it as well. But love is another story. Anytime you see a case where someone was loved by another in the Bible, its was always some extra involved in the situation (i.e. another wife, love for a sister, etc.) The only thing that really speaks of love in the specific context of marriage is given to husbands saying that they should love their wives as Christ love the church, so much so that he gave themselves for her (Eph 5:25).

So I guess browsing through the situation that your friend is going through, one must ask her if this man loves her as the bible would instruct a husband to love his wife. Well, being that he is willing to marry someone else in order to ensure his financially stability over your friend, I would have to question his love for her. And this is just only a part of it. I think Janice posted that scripture in 1 Cor that details love (being patient, kind, etc.). So now, I would ask your friend after reading this scripture is this the type of love that she has for her ex? Or is it that butterfly passionate feeling of love than can come and go? Why did they really break-up? See oftentimes when an ex comes back in the picture, we only look at the good times and sometimes they are exaggerated in our minds to be better than they really were. We never think of the bad times and struggles we went through, b/c for someone reason when certain ex’s come back, we tend to block that part out. So looking at the bad and good times, would she be willing to break it off with her fiancée in hopes of this ex doing the same?

Hmm…I agree with Janice. She needs to fast and pray before she moves forward with anything. I believe the ex coming back on the scene is a trick of the enemy, but I don’t necessarily believe that she has to get married right now to this other young man. If she plans to stay with the fiancée, she needs to cut all ties with the ex, b/c then she is allowing an open door for an attack from the enemy. I really pray that everything works out for her.
 
Poohbear said:
Don't avoid marriage for the wrong reasons... Matthew 19:12

!
this talks specifically about Eunuchs...Ok, alot of them seem off to me. Maybe I'm not understanding them correctly.
 
Last edited:
Honeyhips said:
this talks specifically about Eunuchs...Ok, alot of them seem off to me. Maybe I'm not understanding them correctly.
Okay... a eunuch is a man with no testicles. Let's say a woman fell in love with a enuch and avoids marrying him because he has no testicles. That would be marrying for the wrong reasons based on his physical limitations. Seeing marriage as an inconvenience or as something taking away from our freedom is selfishness. The only reason we should remain single is to use the time and freedom to serve God. Does that help?

What others seem off to you??? I can explain them for you to help you understand the verses better. ;)
 
LondonDiva said:
Janice they are both saved however she told me today that her ex resurfaced in her life (not physically) he lives in Africa, born in the US. He's engaged as is she. She's not in love with her fiancee but loves him and is going to marry him as she can't face being the 'evil doer' in her family's eyes by breaking things off with him. She told me that she's in love with her ex as he is with her. I told her that they need to be together if they are so in love and marry each other, but her ex will lose out financially from his father if he doesn't marry this girl in Africa. It's so soap opera drama-esque.

If you can't get through to your friend, perhaps you need to let her fiance know...

It's not fair to him and he'll thank you later. No one deserves to be duped into a loveless marriage.
 
Poohbear said:
Okay... a eunuch is a man with no testicles. Let's say a woman fell in love with a enuch and avoids marrying him because he has no testicles. That would be marrying for the wrong reasons based on his physical limitations. Seeing marriage as an inconvenience or as something taking away from our freedom is selfishness. The only reason we should remain single is to use the time and freedom to serve God. Does that help?

What others seem off to you??? I can explain them for you to help you understand the verses better. ;)

Okay, who is going to marry a TESTICLE-LESS man? LOL!

Raise your hand REAL HIGH so I can see ya! :)

That's like marrying a woman with no vagina!
 
This verse gives a defintion of what enuchs are. Where does it talk about a woman falling in love with one. Why would a woman fall in love with an Eunuch whose primary function was to serve the Church and God? Not having testicles is a little more than having a physical limitation.

I understood most of the verses, just not in the same context with what you say they are explaining.
Poohbear said:
Okay... a eunuch is a man with no testicles. Let's say a woman fell in love with a enuch and avoids marrying him because he has no testicles. That would be marrying for the wrong reasons based on his physical limitations. Seeing marriage as an inconvenience or as something taking away from our freedom is selfishness. The only reason we should remain single is to use the time and freedom to serve God. Does that help?

What others seem off to you??? I can explain them for you to help you understand the verses better. ;)
 
He'd still have a pee pee right? No testicles would limit him in being able to pro-create. If that's the case then there's a hand raised right here. It would be like a man marrying or not marrying a woman with no functioning ovaries right? or wrong?
 
LondonDiva said:
He'd still have a pee pee right? No testicles would limit him in being able to pro-create. If that's the case then there's a hand raised right here. It would be like a man marrying or not marrying a woman with no functioning ovaries right? or wrong?

My understanding of castration is a man doesn't feel any type of sexual desire. He can't procreate, obviously, because his testicles which contained his sperm are gone.

A de-balled man has no interest in sex of any kind or with any thing.
 
Poohbear said:
Wrong attitudes toward marriage... Matthew 5:31-32

God doesn't want everyone to marry... Matthew 19:10-12

10 His disciples say unto him, If the case of the man be so with his wife, it is not good to marry. 11 But he said unto them, All men cannot receive this saying, save they to whom it is given. 12 For there are some eunuchs, which were so born from their mother's womb: and there are some eunuchs, which were made eunuchs of men: and there be eunuchs, which have made themselves eunuchs for the kingdom of heaven's sake. He that is able to receive it, let him receive it.

I thought the first verses had to do with Moses (and them :)) putting away their wives for the wrong reason. I thought it was part of the previous verses. But 12 shows where God says that not everyone will be married.

Don't avoid marriage for the wrong reasons... Matthew 19:12

12 For there are some eunuchs, which were so born from their mother's womb: and there are some eunuchs, which were made eunuchs of men: and there be eunuchs, which have made themselves eunuchs for the kingdom of heaven's sake. He that is able to receive it, let him receive it.

I already explained my thoughts on this one. He says nothing about a woman wanting to marry a eunuch but didn't.
Jesus speaks about the purpose of marriage... Mark 10:2,5-9

2 And the Pharisees came to him, and asked him, Is it lawful for a man to put away his wife?
this says nothing about marriage, they just asked a question. It is like hearing half of a story. The Pharisees are still asking about divorce. But the last part did make sense. 5 And Jesus answered and said unto them, For the hardness of your heart he wrote you this precept. 6 But from the beginning of the creation God made them male and female. 7 For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and cleave to his wife; 8 And they twain shall be one flesh: so then they are no more twain, but one flesh. 9 What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.
Paul's lessons about marriage... 1 Corinthians 7:7,32-34,38

Don't assume you married the wrong person... 1 Corinthians 7:17
17 But as God hath distributed to every man, as the Lord hath called every one, so let him walk. And so ordain I in all churches.
This sounds like something was left out. On it's own it doesn't make sense, in the context of marrying the wrong person. But when I read the scriptures above it, it made a little bit more sense. Although this is something I will get more clarification on.

1 Now concerning the things whereof ye wrote unto me: It is good for a man not to touch a woman. 2 Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband. 3 Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence: and likewise also the wife unto the husband. 4 The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband: and likewise also the husband hath not power of his own body, but the wife. 5 Defraud ye not one the other, except it be with consent for a time, that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency. 6 But I speak this by permission, and not of commandment. 7 For I would that all men were even as I myself. But every man hath his proper gift of God, one after this manner, and another after that. 8 I say therefore to the unmarried and widows, it is good for them if they abide even as I. 9 But if they cannot contain, let them marry: for it is better to marry than to burn. 10 And unto the married I command, yet not I, but the Lord, Let not the wife depart from her husband: 11 But and if she depart, let her remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband: and let not the husband put away his wife. 12 But to the rest speak I, not the Lord: If any brother hath a wife that believeth not, and she be pleased to dwell with him, let him not put her away. 13 And the woman which hath an husband that believeth not, and if he be pleased to dwell with her, let her not leave him. 14 For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband: else were your children unclean; but now are they holy. 15 But if the unbelieving depart, let him depart. A brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases: but God hath called us to peace. 16 For what knowest thou, O wife, whether thou shalt save thy husband? or how knowest thou, O man, whether thou shalt save thy wife?

OFF TOPIC:
Do verses 8 and 9 say that God really didn't want people to get married? Or is he talking about people who are widowed and those who are not virigins(had premarital sex)? So does this mean, that ideally if you were not a virgin you could not get married?


Problems that marriage will not solve... 1 Corinthians 7:28

this one made sense. It said that even though you are married, it doesn't mean you won't have problems with the flesh.

How should a man love his wife?... Ephesians 5:25-33; 1 Peter 3:7

This one made sense too.

Hope these scriptures help in some kind of way. Make sure you read some commentaries on these passages as well to get a better understanding. God bless!

Matthew 5:31-32 Seemed to deal more with divorce. I guess that could be a wrong attitude, but not in the context of this post.
31 It hath been said, Whosoever shall put away his wife, let him give her a writing of divorcement: 32 But I say unto you, That whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery.

 
Blossssom said:
My understanding of castration is a man doesn't feel any type of sexual desire. He can't procreate, obviously, because his testicles which contained his sperm are gone.

A de-balled man has no interest in sex of any kind or with any thing.

Castration:eek: Ok I thought there were some that were born without but it was still functioning. In that case then, hells no!:lachen:

Thanks for the 'translation'

Note to self:Research Eunuch before raising hand and answering.
 
LondonDiva said:
Castration:eek: Ok I thought there were some that were born without but it was still functioning. In that case then, hells no!:lachen:

Thanks for the 'translation'

Note to self:Research Eunuch before raising hand and answering.

LOL!

You cracked me up when you asked if he still had a "pee pee"... yea and that's the only thing it's good for: TO PEE! :)
 
Back
Top