Is moving the best thing to do?

[Poutchi]

Hey Ladies,
I hope I will find help here.
I have been married to who I thought is my best friend and I still find myself not being able to talk deeply about things beside with him but the relationship just failed... we were not seing life the same way. I am moslem and he is but let's just say that ( these are his own words) " God does not guide his life"... The day he told me that after an argument that we should be doing things according to what we have in common with is our religion ( since we are from different country) and that he answered me that was the day I felt like there is no issue... But I kept praying and asking God to show him the light and to move him away from the non essential things in this life.
But anyway, we have been apart for almost a year now and I am still depressed as hell ( sorry for the word). I am taking mood swings pills and have tried a psychiatric before. I also see a naturopath with who I sometimes talk about this but i just cannot seem to overcome the lost of my husband and my best friend.
Lately i have been thinking alot about moving out of this city. I just feel like I have to disappear from him, put a physical distance between us to keep myself from being emotionnal dependent on him.
A friend of mine does not think I should run away from this and should deal with it but I think I am ready for a change. I am ready to sell the house we bought together and that I bought from us after the divorce, ready to meet new friends ( which is not possible here, the city is soo small, everyone knows every one) and start doing things for fun ( I do not think i can here since i am always afraid i will run into him or his friends)...
I just want to have a insight of what you guys would do. Also if anyone can pray for me, please do so. I really need it. I am away from my family, came to canada from africa to study and now I have a very good job I thank God for. All my family is in Africa. I have a sister here but she is always trying to set me up with other men and just the thought of me being with someone else makes me want to puke... I don't know what to do...

 

[Je Ne Sais Quoi]

(((hugs))) I think you need to stay in prayer and if you feel that it is time to move and have a fresh start them that is what you need to do.

 

[Poohbear]

Is moslem the same as muslim?

 

[Poutchi]

Yes it is .
Thanks Je ne sais quoi... Do you speak french? I am french also.

 

[Je Ne Sais Quoi]

No, I don't I just like the moniker. My grand mother did though even though she died months before I was born.

Are you ok hun?

 

[BlackHairDiva]

Hey Ladies,
I hope I will find help here.
I have been married to who I thought is my best friend and I still find myself not being able to talk deeply about things beside with him but the relationship just failed... we were not seing life the same way. I am moslem and he is but let's just say that ( these are his own words) " God does not guide his life"... The day he told me that after an argument that we should be doing things according to what we have in common with is our religion ( since we are from different country) and that he answered me that was the day I felt like there is no issue... But I kept praying and asking God to show him the light and to move him away from the non essential things in this life.
But anyway, we have been apart for almost a year now and I am still depressed as hell ( sorry for the word). I am taking mood swings pills and have tried a psychiatric before. I also see a naturopath with who I sometimes talk about this but i just cannot seem to overcome the lost of my husband and my best friend.
Lately i have been thinking alot about moving out of this city. I just feel like I have to disappear from him, put a physical distance between us to keep myself from being emotionnal dependent on him.
A friend of mine does not think I should run away from this and should deal with it but I think I am ready for a change. I am ready to sell the house we bought together and that I bought from us after the divorce, ready to meet new friends ( which is not possible here, the city is soo small, everyone knows every one) and start doing things for fun ( I do not think i can here since i am always afraid i will run into him or his friends)...
I just want to have a insight of what you guys would do. Also if anyone can pray for me, please do so. I really need it. I am away from my family, came to canada from africa to study and now I have a very good job I thank God for. All my family is in Africa. I have a sister here but she is always trying to set me up with other men and just the thought of me being with someone else makes me want to puke... I don't know what to do...

I think you should move. I think you should do something that will help you get over this but do not neglect your studies at the same time. Prends soin de toi et bonne chance dans tes etudes!!! *Follow canadian in the house! *

 

[ThickHair]

Why do you need to stay? Why would you want to stay?

 

[donna894]

Hey Ladies,
I hope I will find help here.
I have been married to who I thought is my best friend and I still find myself not being able to talk deeply about things beside with him but the relationship just failed... we were not seing life the same way. I am moslem and he is but let's just say that ( these are his own words) " God does not guide his life"... The day he told me that after an argument that we should be doing things according to what we have in common with is our religion ( since we are from different country) and that he answered me that was the day I felt like there is no issue... But I kept praying and asking God to show him the light and to move him away from the non essential things in this life.
But anyway, we have been apart for almost a year now and I am still depressed as hell ( sorry for the word). I am taking mood swings pills and have tried a psychiatric before. I also see a naturopath with who I sometimes talk about this but i just cannot seem to overcome the lost of my husband and my best friend.
Lately i have been thinking alot about moving out of this city. I just feel like I have to disappear from him, put a physical distance between us to keep myself from being emotionnal dependent on him.
A friend of mine does not think I should run away from this and should deal with it but I think I am ready for a change. I am ready to sell the house we bought together and that I bought from us after the divorce, ready to meet new friends ( which is not possible here, the city is soo small, everyone knows every one) and start doing things for fun ( I do not think i can here since i am always afraid i will run into him or his friends)...
I just want to have a insight of what you guys would do. Also if anyone can pray for me, please do so. I really need it. I am away from my family, came to canada from africa to study and now I have a very good job I thank God for. All my family is in Africa. I have a sister here but she is always trying to set me up with other men and just the thought of me being with someone else makes me want to puke... I don't know what to do...

You know what you need to do and you owe it to yourself to follow through. I disagree with your friend who thinks you would be running away. I think you're simply moving on. You have dealt with this. You're divorced now. Staying in a small town with all these memories and limited opportunities could be keeping you depressed. Its really time to move forward with your life.

ETA - I will be praying for you.. that you receive the joy and peace that He has in store for you

 

[Poutchi]

I think you should move. I think you should do something that will help you get over this but do not neglect your studies at the same time. Prends soin de toi et bonne chance dans tes etudes!!! *Follow canadian in the house! *

I am currently working full time as an electrical engineer and doing a part time masters in the power systems. I have downsized the number of classes i take every semester to 1 per semester and i won't be finishing before another 2 years. I was thinking about starting to find a job in another canadian city first and the studies, i can always continue in another university.

No, I don't I just like the moniker. My grand mother did though even though she died months before I was born.

Are you ok hun?

Yeah I am doing ok, last week end was rough but it is monday... gotta get back to work

Why do you need to stay? Why would you want to stay?

I am studying and working. Also i own a house now and that would take me time to sell, find another job and arrange for housing in the new city. I am also planning to find a good 2-3 months I will spend in africa receiving affection from people who love me truly before I start the new "life"

You know what you need to do and you owe it to yourself to follow through. I disagree with your friend who thinks you would be running away. I think you're simply moving on. You have dealt with this. You're divorced now. Staying in a small town with all these memories and limited opportunities could be keeping you depressed. Its really time to move forward with your life.

ETA - I will be praying for you.. that you receive the joy and peace that He has in store for you

Thanks alot all off you for answering. I kind of find reconfort reading through this. I will keep you updated. Oh and If anyone knows any company hiring for an electrical engineer...let me know
I have googled and in Toronto there are 2 job openings for the exact same job ( just the network is 20 times bigger) I am doing here which I really like. The only thing that is making me nervous is that this is my first job so technicly I won t be able to give references... But we will see
Thanks again a lot. May God reward you for your help. Amen