Is it just me???? Help me understand.

[CatSuga]

I've noticed this all around me.
I could be at work, school, mall, or Wal-mart. I see very few black women wearing their own hair. It's either a weave, some kind of clip on pony tail, braided extenstions, or a wig. The only black women I see wearing their own hair are those with really short hair cuts, old people, nappturals, jerri curls, the very few that acturally have hair, children, and those that are just to broke to afford a weave. I'll say that on daily basis 70% of the black women I see have some form of weave.

 

[CatSuga]

I'm sorry, I still don't understand why it is that folks have to read into it when a black woman wears a weave, but no one is batting an eye at Paris, Jessica Simpson, Gwen Stefani or the other thousands of White women wearing fake hair.

Maybe because the %-age is greater in blackwomen...........and because it's soooo damn obvious.

 

[hopeful]

I feel ya' Hopeful, and I certainly agree that it's not everyone's responsibility to wear the weight of the black plight on their shoulders.

I do think, though, that teens are influenced by what they see more than anyone else. As someone who "has made it," I feel that I do have a greater responsibility for my actions (this is ME, I don't expect everyone to think like this). For many of the girls on the bus, I am the only business professional white collar black woman they'll see all day, and I tell you, many of them are looking dead in my face to see how I react to certain things, how I dress, how I rock my hair styles. Our girls need SO MUCH help, but that's a different topic.

My mom used to tell her African American foster care clients (children), "you don't have time to be crazy." This is how I feel about a bunch of stuff black folks go through--we just don't have the time for some behaviors. So on the hair issue,I have no problem with adult women wearing their hair however they want, and I'm never, ever, going to throw hateraide on my phony pony, glued-in/sewn in hair or wig-wearing sisters. I do have significant issue trying to teach teen girls how to unlearn destructive hair behavior because they believe the hype--often these grow up to be grown women who believe the hype (knowing and making a choice is different than feeling you have no other choice at all). The hair thing is minor the grand scheme of things, granted, but still, it's yet another thing.

Thanks Cheleigh for the response. I think I would feel even more the way you do if I was in your position, you know on a daily basis seeing these teens, and being around children in foster care, etc. For a minute I was you and I could see the girls on the bus--"sigh". I live in New England in a suburb with few african-americans and nearly all of the african-american children, teens and women I'm around wear their own hair and most are natural too. So, I don't see the affects on a daily basis. I'm glad those girls see you everyday, you'll probably never know what a difference it makes. Thanks for sharing.

 

[FeelinIt]

I'm sorry, I still don't understand why it is that folks have to read into it when a black woman wears a weave, but no one is batting an eye at Paris, Jessica Simpson, Gwen Stefani or the other thousands of White women wearing fake hair.

Because of the history behind the hate of our natural hair. No matter what anyone on this board wants to say, or how we want to sugar coat it, we have been conditioned to think our hair is ugly and the only way it is pretty is to alter it or cover it. It's deeper than giving your hair a break or style versatility. I like wearing braids too. I'm fighting with myself not to get small braids because I know my hairline will be nonexistant if I do.

I've been told by my relatives that I have a good grade of hair, that's why it does what it does. I've had co-workers ask me when am I going to comb my hair. I've had one co-worker who said the natural hair thing is a fad and will blow over. She has been wearing fake hair since I have been on the job and that has been over five years. I have regular african american hair and I am finally learning to love it for what it is. The problem with us is that we try to make our hair do what it was not meant to do, hence all the damage.

There is nothing wrong with rocking ya falsey! LOL Do ya thang as long as your hair underneath is nice and healthy. Too many wearers don't take care of their hair underneath and then go through the vicious cycle of covering it up because their hair is damaged.

 

[honeycomb719]

Because of the history behind the hate of our natural hair. No matter what anyone on this board wants to say, or how we want to sugar coat it, we have been conditioned to think our hair is ugly and the only way it is pretty is to alter it or cover it. It's deeper than giving your hair a break or style versatility. I like wearing breads too. I'm fighting with myself not to get small braids because I know my hairline will be nonexistant if I do.

I've been told by my relatives that I have a good grade of hair, that's why it does what it does. I've had co-workers ask me when am I going to comb my hair. I've had one co-worker who said the natural hair thing is a fad and will blow over. She has been wearing fake hair since I have been on the job and that has been over five years. I have regular african american hair and I am finally learning to love it for what it is. The problem with us is that we try to make our hair do what it was not meant to do, hence all the damage.

There is nothing wrong with rocking ya falsey! LOL Do ya thang as long as your hair underneath is nice and healthy. Too many wearers don't take care of their hair underneath and then go through the vicious cycle of covering it up because their hair damaged.

So so true. I was once stuck in that cycle, but now my hair is healthy underneath

 

[Stormy]

I'm a a avid weave/wig wearer. My rationale behind it, is it keeps me from doing damaging things to my hair. My hair isnt at a length where I'm comfortable wearing it out, so I wear wigs, weaves or braids.
I desire to wear my own hair oneday, but not until I've raeched a length Im comfortable with.
Short hair on me, doesnt suit my face. But, thats just my opinion. Last time I wore my own hair out, it was spritz to high heaven, and took alot of heat for it to look good. Too much of that is damaging to my fragile thin hair, so until my natural hair is TIGHT, I'll be sporting my ole faithful wigs/weaves til I present lovely healthy flowing hair, I can be proud to flaunt.

Well honeycomb, I must say your short natural looks VERY good on you! Makes me wanna hurry up and do the big chop!

 

[Stormy]

I don't understand wearing fake hair for a straight 5,10, and 15 years, but I do wear braids for a period of 4-6 months, off and on. Sometimes longer. When I wear them it's for the purpose of growing and thickening my own hair. This works for me. Now, I'm wearing them to transition to natural. Once I go natural I plan to continue wearing them off and on to add extra length for a change. When my hair reaches my new goal (shoulder length natural) then I probably won't wear the braids as often.

One woman I know has been wearing weaves for a good 6 years or longer. She's never worn her own hair out. She claims that her hair is the same length as the weave (a little longer than shoulder), but says it's very thin. I think it's probably thinning out more from wearing the weaves for so long and not giving it the proper care.

 

[keldevine]

I love my sew in weave. I wear it strictly to retain length because I am not manipulating my hair at all. My hair has thrived from them. My hair is currently a few inches away from bra strap and very thick and healhly. I am actually wearing a sew in weave now. I will post pictures after I take it out in one week. But I do agree with the other ladies about wearing weave for several years. I look at it like this. If you are going to wear a weave, get a sew-in so you can retain lengh. Keep your hair moisturized, and must sure you go to someone that knows what take are doing. I have seen several of my friends that grew thier hair out beautifully with a sew-in.