I'm thinking about Relaxing...

[mscounselor]

D!!,

When I read your posts I totally empathized. When I had the hardest times was when things were not well in life. I agree with hopeful in that there is NO superior path to take. Eat your popeyes, buy some ice cream or cake, and cry and vent all you want. Once the emotions settle a bit, clarity will set in and you'll know what you want to do. At least at that point whatever decision you make will come from a place that is rational. (Lack of a cycle is no fun...been there done that...made sure I didn't schedule any major decisions around then)
You are welcome to pm/email me for support anytime.
You're in my prayers!
MsC

 

[Cheleigh]

I had to post on this.

Each of us has a different reason for transitioning or going natural or getting a relaxer, or doing whatever we do to our hair, and that reason is as individual and as personal as the hairs on our respective heads.

I am transitioning because relaxed hair is no longer "me." It is an personal journey for me, and every new quarter inch of texture I see, I fall more in love with myself--it is authenically "me." It's interesting actually, because tending to my two textures during this process has forced me to spend more time cultivating "me." In my chaotic world (school, the men folks, work, community needs, church, family, etc.), forcing myself to patiently detangle my hair (although I hate it), painstakingly researching tools and tactics for my transitioning journey...has allowed me to uncover a new level of self of which I was previously unaware. Being able work with my own hair makes me feel more in control of at least ONE thing in my life. Over the years, l have learned to love my lips, my African cheekbones, my nose, my body shape. Now, I am learning to love my kinks, my coils, my curls, and my naps.

Now, those are my reasons. Other women's reasons will be completely different, and I think we always have to look at our reasons compared to the benefits for ourselves. I also think that when we're emotionally taxed, it is a poor time to make decisions contrary to what we've previously decided. Sometimes we have to give ourselves time--breathe, meditate. In this instance, get a weave or braids to give yourself a break from daily hair styling, and think about your own reasons for transitioning. Then make the decision that will work best for you. HTHS.

 

[Nanyanika]

I'm feeling the same way, i'm going to give my supplements more time, to work before deciding whether to continue texturizing. Give yourself more time, you could even braid your hair up, so that you don't have to deal with the textures.

 

[*Happily Me*]

Thanks to all of you. I feel much more stronger in my decision not to relax. I have to admit that I am not happy with my naps today, but i'm going to try to learn to live with them for at least a year.

I deep conditioned my hair then pulled it back into a french roll. It looks aight, nothing to write home about. But, that's ok for today...

Thanks all for your support, understanding, and prayers. I'm hanging in there and I even find myself giggling today.

 

[angellazette]

I know I'm tired of relaxing and would rather not do it, but then being 8 months post relaxer, sometimes I want to relax.

 

[Country gal]

I had to post on this.

Each of us has a different reason for transitioning or going natural or getting a relaxer, or doing whatever we do to our hair, and that reason is as individual and as personal as the hairs on our respective heads.

I am transitioning because relaxed hair is no longer "me." It is an personal journey for me, and every new quarter inch of texture I see, I fall more in love with myself--it is authenically "me." It's interesting actually, because tending to my two textures during this process has forced me to spend more time cultivating "me." In my chaotic world (school, the men folks, work, community needs, church, family, etc.), forcing myself to patiently detangle my hair (although I hate it), painstakingly researching tools and tactics for my transitioning journey...has allowed me to uncover a new level of self of which I was previously unaware. Being able work with my own hair makes me feel more in control of at least ONE thing in my life. Over the years, l have learned to love my lips, my African cheekbones, my nose, my body shape. Now, I am learning to love my kinks, my coils, my curls, and my naps.

Now, those are my reasons. Other women's reasons will be completely different, and I think we always have to look at our reasons compared to the benefits for ourselves. I also think that when we're emotionally taxed, it is a poor time to make decisions contrary to what we've previously decided. Sometimes we have to give ourselves time--breathe, meditate. In this instance, get a weave or braids to give yourself a break from daily hair styling, and think about your own reasons for transitioning. Then make the decision that will work best for you. HTHS.

Well said.

 

[imstush]

Don't do it. I fell back on the relaxer bandwagon, and I now regret the choices (plural because i've done it more than once-hell who am i to give advice). Just think about the reasons why you chose to be natural!!! Not to mention you are an encouragement for me...because I love your transitioning phase, I am trying to find some flexi rods.

 

[Belladonna]

Hey D,
In the end when all is calm ;whatever happiness we can grab is ours to keep. Do what makes you happy! Smile ! Better (hair ) days comin' right up.