i'm so ready to BIG cHoP (vent)!

[shellzfoshizzle]

Just me venting before I go to bed:

I am so sick of my hair. I keep telling myself that I have come this far in my transition, there is no turning back. Three months without a relaxer is a big thing for me and I am proud of myself for sticking to my personal challenge. I have been a member of this board for a year and some change and my relaxed hair has not gained any length and is...well....I can't even think of a word. I spent a lot of money on all types of products that don't work for me, were a waste, etc. I have found LOTS and LOTS of information on this board and I'm glad that I renewed my subscription to help me get through my transition when I need help. I see what all the natural headed ladies mean when they say, 'Why didn't I do this sooner?' Being a college student, a lot of my friends do each others hair, including relaxers and their hair looks just fine. I don't get it. I am so tired of hair falling in the sink, hearing hair snap when I comb it, the manipulation, trying to be cute with each relaxed hair in the right place while I got newgrowth underneath it all and buck shots in the back. I'm so tired of it. I don't know how to braid or twist (I guess I need to learn for when I am 100% natural) and I don't wear protective styles, braids or weave. I got microbraids for a month this summer and they were aight. Now, I do rollersets twice a week. I'm so tired of stupid rollersets too. I've been wearing rollersets and doobies since I was in the 9th grade. I want a new look. I recently stopped doing CW because it is getting colder and my hair is dry as h*ll and I found it wasn't working for me. I think that'll be something to do in the summer. I tried to do lots of loose two strand twists for a twist out to wear for a week but they don't stay raveled, mainly because my ends are all thinned out, even after a trim. I just don't get it. Is it possible for a relaxed head to wear a wash and go or will that just look a HAM?

I saw a younger lady in a resturant today and her twa or bc was sooo cute. My friend on facebook has a really cute fro too. I just can't wait. To be free. Free from the products, styling, spending time in the mirror, chemicals for good, each hair in the right place. I know this is what I want, to be natural and I am going to try to hold out until July 2006 until I can big chop. I said I wasn't going to cut AT ALL until my natural hair reaches my current relaxed length (shoulder length). That's a negative. I want to be done with relaxed hair for GOOD so July 06 it is! When I'm in the car, I massage my scalp and all that thick, healthy, curly hair feels sooo great. Then I smooth my fingers out to the ends of my hair, and feel nothing but about 3 strands of broken off highlighted hair lol....I can't wait for this summer, BC here I come. God give me strength to hold out that long.


Good night and Happy Thanksgiving! Drunk uncles, ham and out of school is where I'll be for the break!

 

[shellzfoshizzle]

OKay...who is trying to be cute and rate my post with 3 stars when no one has even posted any comments to it yet? Real cute.

 

[sillygurl18]

Your twists aren't staying raveled because they are relaxed. The protein bonds are broken so they don't stay. I used to wear wash and go's. I guess you'll just have to try one on a day that you won't be going anywhere.

If you really want to big chop I say go for it. I bc'ed after only 4 months. I couldn't take it I was so tired of my relaxed hair. It wasn't even damaged. I was just tired of it. It wasn't appealing to me anymore.

 

[beyondcute]

HIIIII! Im transitioning and a college student as well. Sometimes when Im on campus and see the gorgeous hair I just want a relaxer! BUT I look at how far Ive come and where I want ot be and in an instant Im over it. Most of the natural girl on campus get the big compliments. And to top that off I go to a majority white school! 3 months is a long way to go but you can do it. Many people have! Just keep on moving! Now as far as ease of living, I dont think natural is any easier than relaxed. You still have to wash and take care of your hair BUT it (9 times outta 10) will be stronger and healthier than your relaxed hair (especially of you dont use protective styles) I know exactly how you feel. My hair grows but not to my liking and Im tired of spending more money and time on hair then I do entertaining myself. I couldve seen every movie this year had it not been for the $90 relaxers and $80 worth of products I was buying every 2 or 3 months. I do hope you continue to transition. Maybe some braids will get your hair out of your way for a while. Im telling you know if I didnt have braids Id have a TWA. I cant take the 2 textures right now.... Finals coming up too?!?! Good luck and PM me if you want. It would be nice to have somebody to talk to during thier transition while Im going thru mines.

 

[shellzfoshizzle]

Aww thanks for replying BeyondCute

 

[beyondcute]

Are you feeling any better about your transition? I really hope you keep with it

 

[shellzfoshizzle]

I just needed to vent yesterday. I am still frustrated about the two textures, even though I may have about two inches of newgrowth and broke off strings of relaxed hair looking a mess but still trying to be cute with it.

There was never any question about me relaxing again, I am definitely in this transition for one year, then I am BC'ing. My mind is made up and I'm so serious. Your hair is wayyyy longer than mine, mine is alittle above shoulder length, but I think it's cool if we can be transition sisters if you are serious!

My hair is about a 4a relaxed and so far it looks like my natural hair is a 3b (the heck if I know). It's not that curly/wavy unless some of it is underprocessed hair that is fooling me.

 

[beyondcute]

Girl I dont even know what my hair type is! LOL But yea Id enjoy havign a transition sister. We can vent to each other without risking a 3 star rating Sending you a PM now

 

[RainbowCurls]

shellzfoshizzle, I get very annoyed with my relaxed hair too, and the time I wasted trying to grow it!

Anyway, I'm planning to chop in July '06 too... can't wait!

 

[Cheleigh]

I'm wearing buns most of the time because I'm too lazy to do any other styles now. My hair looks almost completely natural in buns now. My relaxed hair is boring me--I can't do a twist out or anything with this relaxed hair. Only thing I like about it is that I can still wear buns.

After my BC, I won't be able to bun it for a bit.

I cut another 2.5" off Monday night to reduce tangling and because I cut 2" off every two months. If all goes according to plan, I am still doing my BC in March, which is now just three months away.

 

[nurseN98]

I know what you going through! I transitioned for a long time, but I could handle it even though it was annoying dealing with the 2 textures. I would just say though, when you feel you have absolutely no more patience and tolerance for it, that's when you chop. I was supposed to do a full 2year transition and chopped 6 months earlier then I had planned. It is a veeeery liberating feeling not dealing with the 2 textures.

But I don't want to sway you from your path...lol. I did the same thing Chaleigh is doing, I would chop an inch off every month and the detangling and all that got a little easier and it helped ease me into a "shorter hair" frame of mind since I'd has longer hair when I started.

 

[Suri]

Shellz....Girl I have been there twice! Try doing two textures with hair up to your chin and the new growth pulling it up to your ear!

I started transitioning Dec 2004 and I still haven't gotten a perm. So if I can last this long with shorter hair than you, I know you can do it. I have the same frustration with trying twists, braids and other styles because the roots are thick and take well but then the stringy ends are such a disappointment. Be strong, get your hair braided and let those help you to the 6 month mark, I am sure you will chop earlier or get used to it by 6 months. It's cold as shyt out so stay away from the wash and go. If I were you I would braid nightly and wear it bunned up. OR bantu knots are great for permed ends because you can take large chunks of hair and wrap them around the knot that will give the permed ends some curl. I wish you the best because I was where you are but I decided that I will relax in January, my hair is just not in the mood to be natural next year, maybe 2008. BUt it's fun, it's sexy as hell, and it's healthy. Stay strong. I did the BC in December 2003 (after 7 months) and had a cute highlighted fro, it can be done ! PM me if you ever need some encouragement. it's hard but you stick to your goals!!

 

[angellazette]

I've been wanting to chop too but I'm trying to hold out for as long as possible...I think some parts in the middle of my head may be all natural though plus the parts I minichopped on.

I am a 4a, but with this transition I've noticed that I have 3b or 3a sections also and my nape is practically straight. Ironically, these would also be the sections that the relaxer was kept on the longest...no wonder it was always breaking off.

 

[tammiematthews]

Hi shellzfoshizzle!!
I too am 3 months post relaxer and only recently decided to transition. And honestly I am already tempted to BC!! LOL! I have such a busy schedule and dont really have the time or patience to deal with my two textures. I think that I will be braided before long also. I think that it will help. I plan to wear my braids for 2 months tops. I'll take them down for a few weeks, deep condition, cut 1-2 inches of permed hair off and then rebraid. I hope it helps to know that you're not alone!!