I'm About To Go Back To Relaxing

[BGT]

Hi guys, so I've been relaxed since I was 9. I always had really thick hairs and also thick density growing up, but around the time I hit the 10 year mark, my hairs started to become fine. I still had a lot of hair, my individual hairs just became fine. Since then, I've tried everything from castor oil, to collagen supplements, to stretching my relaxers to 12-16 weeks, to no direct heat, to thickening shampoos/conditioners and nothing has worked. I could have hair down to my waist but still not enough hair to make full bun.

So I decided to transition to natural, solely because I believe my straightened natural hair will look fuller and thicker than my straightened relaxed hair. My last relaxer was in March 2015 so I've almost hit 1 year. I really haven't played with my hair, using mostly protective styles like box braids, crochet braids and buns. Right now, I have a sew-in with some leave out in the center and sides and I am finding it impossible to keep my leave out straight!

I use coconut oil, special products from Aveda and Keracare, and I cannot keep the natural hair from getting frizzy as soon as I step outside. It's defeating the purpose of wearing a protective style to have to flat iron almost everyday; by contrast, my relaxed ends are withstanding the humidity fine and even pre-transition when I wore weaves with relaxed leave-out, I had no problem.

So i think I'm just going to end my transition and get a relaxer. Maybe just relax every 6 months? I just can't handle this. Any advice would be most appreciated.

 

[Crackers Phinn]

I'm not a weave expert but can't you sew down a closure to avoid leaving hair out?

How do you plan on wearing your hair? If you're just going to relax to wear weaves then maybe investigate how closures work or maybe wearing a texture closer to your straightened natural hair. (Italian straight/yaki/etc.)

I'm not anti-relaxing, I'm natural and wear lace front wigs.

 

[Bunnyhaslonghair]

No advice but it sounds like you're making the right choice for you.

 

[nothidden]

Maybe your products are causing your natural hair to frizz. And it sounds like your hair (and scalp maybe) is tired of perms.

I didn't have the growth with perms that I've experienced w/being natural. But as I mentioned to another poster, natural hair is a whole other ball game. If you do not want to learn your hair (or it doesn't measure up to your expectations), you probably won't like it very much.

I also agree with @Crackers Phinn, why is your hair out w/a protective style? Is that what happens w/new growth?

 

[BGT]

I'm not a weave expert but can't you sew down a closure to avoid leaving hair out?

How do you plan on wearing your hair? If you're just going to relax to wear weaves then maybe investigate how closures work or maybe wearing a texture closer to your straightened natural hair. (Italian straight/yaki/etc.)

I'm not anti-relaxing, I'm natural and wear lace front wigs.

Closures look awful I've never seen one that didn't look like a wig. Maybe I can experiment with frontals, the ones that have the baby hairs, but those are so expensive.

 

[Nightingale]

Transitioning is much harder than being natural, IMO. If you truly want to be natural, you'll need to push through the transition phase. It is easier on the other side. If you're not that invested in being fully natural, then go back to relaxing. You may also want to consider texlaxing. You'll still have some frizz issues, but it should leave you enough texture that your hair will appear fuller.

 

[PureSilver]

There is a product that gives great shine and makes your hair silky smooth with just a blow out. Sebastian Brilliant Thermal Protection and sparkle. Its inexpensive and a little goes a long way.

I wish you the best in whatever you decide,whatever works best for you as long as your hair and scalp is healthy.

 

[overtherainbow]

Now you know you can't expect to have straight leave out while you're deep into your transition lol. You either have to change the hair texture of the weave to match your own hair or to have little to no leave out.
Also transitioning hair is completely different than natural hair. Those last few inches of relaxed hair can really change the game. You can lose a a lot of moisture through those porous ends which would then lead to frizz.

I advise that you wait, see if you can tolerate your natural hair after your transition. If not, then relax if it's too much work. I say this because I was in your shoes. I went natural mainly for thickness. I was over my thinned out length. But halfway through my transition, I was over the awkward frizz and ugly styles. But I stuck it out and now I'm really happy with my thickness.

 

[BGT]

Transitioning is much harder than being natural, IMO. If you truly want to be natural, you'll need to push through the transition phase. It is easier on the other side. If you're not that invested in being fully natural, then go back to relaxing. You may also want to consider texlaxing. You'll still have some frizz issues, but it should leave you enough texture that your hair will appear fuller.

Texlaxing is what I was thinking of doing all along. But I wanted to chop off the relaxed ends, see how my natural hair is, then go from there. I might just chop when I get this weave out.

 

[charmtreese]

I completely agree with the ladies that say transitioning hair is vastly different than natural hair. I would urge you to stick it out, however if it's really getting you down go ahead and relax.

My first time transitioning to natural I gave up and went back to relaxing. My hair grew with relaxers but my fine strands and increasingly diminishing density made me transition again. Now that I'm natural...my strands are still fine but my density is a lot fuller and when straighten my hair looks 100x better than when it was relaxed.

For me having fine strands with relaxers was just a big NO, NO! Being natural just agrees with my overall hair type. If you are noticing issues from relaxers it appears to me that your choice to transition to natural is the right one.

Then again, at the end of the day you have to do what makes you happy!

 

[Kinky4Agirl]

I was natural for a year and a half and hated it. My hair was so thick that I had to wet it just to comb it. I went back to a relaxer and then hated that as well. I am relaxed now and wish I had never gone back to it. Do what works for you but try to remember why you went natural in the first place. If it was because of thinning hair as you say, then a relaxer won't change it. I would try wearing my natural hair and forget about the sew ins... I used to wear airfros, and I'd slick my hair back with a hair band and pick out the rest... Not to mention braids as well... Good luck!

 

[ItsMeLilLucky]

I'm team #whatevermakesyourlifeeasier.
I used to be a militant natural, but look at me all relaxed and stuff

 

[BGT]

Hey guys,

I decided to schedule an appointment for a Design Essentials Smoothing Treatment. It's basically a Brazilian Keratin Treatment without the formaldehyde. it last 12 weeks. I get it on Feb. 13, so I am so excited! Here is somebody's before and after pic.

Edit: this is not me. This is somebody from Google

 

[CICI24]

really pretty!

 

[Misseyl]

Your hair looks lovely.

 

[BGT]

Your hair looks lovely.

That's not me, it's somebody's hair I'm using as an example. My appointment is't for another 3 weeks.

 

[Eiano]

Maybe they can do that to your leave out hair while you remain natural. At the same time, if you're constantly straightening your hair and wearing straight weaves, why not just get the relaxer?

 

[BeautyBlvd]

I'm so late to this post but that's what I would have said to try ... a keratin. My hair is keratin treated and I LOVE it! No more relaxers for me, just a keratin like 2x a year. Your hair came out lovely!

 

[BGT]

So......I just big chopped. Yesterday, I wet my hair to put into a bun and realized I had almost no relaxed ends in the back. So I went ahead and cut the rest off. Its really cute! If I had to type my hair, I'd say a mixture of 3 A, B, and C all over. Very loose in the back and tighter curls on the side. So instead of the straightening, i'm gonna get my curls shaped on Saturday. I'll post pics then!!

 

[Guinan]

Congrats on your BC!! I can't wait to see ur pics

 

[Nightingale]

So......I just big chopped. Yesterday, I wet my hair to put into a bun and realized I had almost no relaxed ends in the back. So I went ahead and cut the rest off. Its really cute! If I had to type my hair, I'd say a mixture of 3 A, B, and C all over. Very loose in the back and tighter curls on the side. So instead of the straightening, i'm gonna get my curls shaped on Saturday. I'll post pics then!!

I can't believe I missed this post! Congrats! Post pics!

 

[BGT]

This is my true texture



A pic of the top of my twist out



Me.

 

[flyygirlll2]

@BGT Congrats on your BC! Pretty hair, pretty woman.