If you have sisters or women you consider sisters......

[brownsugarbaby]

At first my mother and two sisters thought I was crazy and would refer to me as a "know-it-all" when I would give them advice. This was back in high school, when I was a pj and bandwagon hopper.

Then I matured and so did my hair. Stopped giving random advice, buying every product someone raved about, and using everyone's regimen. My hair took off and the request for advice started rolling in.

Both of my sisters and my mother are now natural. My mother's alopecia is getting under control. They ask for tid bits of advice like "how can I get my edges to lay down" or "can I color before a sew-in" or "what can I do about my thinning". So rather than force them into healthy hair habits I've learned to let them come into them on their own time. Its a Healthy Hair JOURNEY, so they'll learn on their own terms in their own time.

 

[FoxxyLocs]

I've been natural since 04 and I never really tried to give out hair advice. Eventually my hair's progress spoke for itself and now my two bffs and my mom are all natural or transitioning. They came to the decision in their own time after seeing my hair (and others I'm sure), but I never tried to talk them into it. Now when they ask I am always happy to share, but I know my methods aren't for everybody.

 

[Maracujá]

I have three sisters, at this point three of us are natural and one is relaxed. I have one sister who is a member here who is gonna relax in the summer after being natural for 6 years. It wasn't hard to get them on board with me, in my culture women care alot about hair.

 

[Bnster]

How true OP? My mom hair grows like weed, but dry and thins out so she constantly cuts it back to just below SL. She just wants to wash and condition then get out of the shower (no in and out) and complains consistently that I wash weekly on my wash day. I think I scare her off of improving her hair health cause of the amount of time I put into my wash day. She tells me straight out flat, she is not doing anything extra. She is relaxed like me and her hair never tangles.

If I had her head of hair I will be to my butt and beyond. How unfair!

 

[NaturallyYours2]

When I first tried telling my mom about this site, she was less than receptive. After seeing my progress pics, she became curious. Now she does henna/dc treatments, uses MT and oils, combs from ends to root and uses heat protectant. They're baby steps but at least it's a start.

 

[MsLizziA]

GaiasDaughter24 lucky... i wish mine where more receptive

 

[AuNaturalMaMa]

I WISH I could convince my little sister to go natural! Or at least adopt healthier practices. As a child she had thick 4a hair. My mom relaxed her hair also. She's now in HS and she terrorizes her hair!! She flat-irons it twice a day at least, with no heat protectant. She constantly changes her hair color. She aways has high manipulation styles that pull her hair so tight she gets the cat-eye effect. She doesnt DC, no mositurizing, no scarf at night. It is always sticking up on her head. I have talked to her a zillion times. Paid for hair cuts to start over at least and have healthy relaxed hair but she doesnt follow through on any of the tips I give her! Braided her down and brought her a wig. Then she terrorized the wig!!!! Cut, it flat-ironed it, I have never seen a wig go downhill so fast!! Agh, she kills me!!

 

[CurlsBazillion]

Aww...DayDreamist and Skyslady remind me of my mom (@LovinLocks) and I. My mom turned me on to LHCF and was trying for years to get me to go natural. I gave all those excuses mentioned up thread and hid my thinning, dry, breaking hair under weaves and such. Now I am 19 months post BC. So don't give up Ladies. There is hope for your loved ones

@OhSoOthentik wow! My mom had dreads since like idk...98'ish to like a year ago and so did my bro, sis (still does), and aunt. Talk about pressure to be natural and I tried it and ran to a relaxer within a year. Now this time its because I wanna do it! So far so good. Good luck on your HHJ!

 

[MsLizziA]

Maracujá What culture is that?
AuNaturalMaMa sounds like my sister that's in school :/ ... except i know damn well she wouldnt wear a wig even if i bought her 1

 

[HauteHippie]

I dont say much to my family and we rarely ever talk hair. I have a couple of family members who are hair "know-it-alls" (and all things natural). It kind of annoyed me early on b/c they are preachy, but I grew up with super-curly, granola-eating hippies so aint nothing revolutionary. Ironically, I started my journey after one of the girls and my hair is longer and lools healthier.

I try not to discount what people say, though.

ETA: I bug the bejeezus out of my mom. Her hair grows fast, but she doesn't take care of it. I think it's a source of insecurity for her and I just want her to feel the way those who love her view her.

Sent from my T-Mobile G2 using T-Mobile G2

 

[itsjusthair88]

Nope, nobody pays attention to me...my hair is still in baby stages and they say, "well, my hair is longer than that!" And it is, but it's also chewed up and thin and my sister's hair has been the same length for like 3 years...talking about it won't grow, chile please. My grandmother has APL-length and at 80, that's a lot, because it's thick still but she "bumps" it everyday and she needs a trim every 5 seconds. Heat damage to the max! All of the women in my family have naturally curly hair, but they all refuse to wear it in it's natural state because they have been taught that it is "nappy" I just SMH, I know that when my hair get's a little length, I will be able to wear it out more and then they will want some advice from me.

 

[Jenko]

Though I'll never consider myself an expert, I know more than most of my family about hair. I'm natural and did my BC in Dec and now that my twin sister and my mom sees my growth, they're asking questions. The key is NOT to get complicated with people who want to dabble but not want to get into deep like some people can.

My twin sister has a relaxer and I'm a firm believer you can have healthy, permed hair with a bit more effort. Slowly but surely we've gotten her from having the dreaded W breakage (with hairs always on her shirt, she never wore white or really light colored shirts because of it) Till 3 or 4 hairs that might be on her shirt. As far as my twin sister's concerned I've emphasized 1) Moisture, moisture, moisture 2) seal your ends with oil 3) Less heat and a heat protector when you do 4) wear a satin scarf to bed. Her hair grows like a weed and -finally- after 3 or so months, she's been retaining her length with no W breakage. My mom has natural hair though with extensions and I've emphasized these points too. Her hair is a particular triumph because due to her medication, her hair had been thinning and at the time she had a relaxer. She BC around the same time I did and now her hair is healthier, thicker and we've learned what it can and can't take with trial and error.

Now my nieces? Bond in glue crazy. I just went to the bathroom and saw a comb full of long hairs with bond in glue all over it. It's a shame because one niece's hair grows like crazy but she's constantly putting bond in glue or flat ironing on a nearly daily basis but it won't go past neck length and when it does, the ends are anorexic and see through. My 15 year old niece had -gorgeous- natural hair when she was younger and it's been a steady decline since she received her first relaxer when she was 12. Her hair was almost arm pit length and thanks to glue (that's currently left a patch on the side of her head) and her constant need to flat iron without a heat protector on a daily basis and no moisturizing, it's now neck length. I've asked if she wanted me to help her but she gives me attitude about it or does the silent "I don't wanna talk" teenager attitude so I've given up on her. I figure she'll come around eventually though she might be bald by then. She currently has braids in her hair (which by the way her friend gave her a perm the same day she did it) so we'll see how it looks when she takes them out in a month. I've learned some people you -can't- help because they'd rather have straggly, uneven permed hair then actually take 15 minutes out of their day to deal with it.

Cest la vie.

 

[Lady S]

I don't even go there.

The friends I'm really close to are happy with their hair and don't ask me for advice other then wear I get my wigs. I do have some coworkers that I would love to discuss things like conditioning and how to care for extensions, but they don't ask me.

I think you have to be careful with unsolicited advice. As bossy as I am, I know what it's like when someone is trying to be "helpful" and end up hurting your feelings, so I don't go there.

 

[EllePixie]

I don't talk to my friends and family about hair unless they ask me, because frankly, it's none of my concern. 0% none. They can walk around with their hair looking any kind of way and it does not bother me one bit. The only thing I can do is make sure my hair looks like thebomb.com - the proof is in the pudding. Perhaps they will come around, perhaps not.

 

[yaya24]

Both of my sisters big chopped and went natural.

I also inspired a couple of girlfriends and a coworker to start caring for their hair.

However, my mom continues to get relaxers before her extension braids.. which she wears for 6-8 weeks--during that time there is no conditioning or washing...or moisturizing for that matter.

Although she says that our hair looks great and that its healthy etc.. She's not changing anything.

Be she likes it... so I love it

 

[Victoria44]

my mother and close friends continue to complain that i do "too much" too my hair and i'm going to make it fall out. BUT my mother always calls me and asks what she should pick up from the BSS, and my friends let me do their hair before considering the salon now, so i know they're starting to listen

even though they're not completely receptive to my advice, i'm extremely repetitive with it, and they're all definitely catching on.. whether they like it or not...

 

[jerseygurl]

I do my mom's hair but she's relaxed while I'm transitioning. I won't ask her to go natural cos I know she won't, I'll just keep taking care of her hair.

I rarely talk hair to people not even my sisters cos I believe everyone must decide if hair is that important to them. It may not be. I have a cousin who is into hair as I am but she uses wigs and weaves a lot and they messed with her hair so she had to BC. She is also a member here

 

[ProdigalDiva]

It's funny, the only women I consider to be "sisters" are my line sisters. All six of us are natural at this point, but we didn't start that way... I can't believe how much we've grown as women in the process of moving towards natural hair. I still remember my four literally crying over how much of her hair had broken off due to the perm she'd always worn... now she has beautiful, natural twists and her confidence has skyrocketed. Another sister of mine went from a perm to natural in the past couple of years... her story is on the blog, but basically she's never felt better about her hair.

It's amazing how much our self confidence as women is tied to our hair (or at least from what I've seen it is). I wonder if it's the same for all women, or just black women?

 

[Mische]

My mother has been very receptive to my hair tips in the last 6 months or so. She stopped relaxing and seems to copy everything I buy. I keep noticing new stuff I've started using has multiplied and can now be found in her bathroom as well. This is great for me because when I'm running low I just dip into her stash. She still uses more heat than I think she should, but I try not to step on any toes. Her hair has filled in nicely in the last few months and that makes me happy. It's funny how much satisfaction you can get from watching someone else's hair thrive.

I've also turned one of my close girlfriends into a hair crazed nut. She doesn't post on boards, but she knows the lingo, is addicted to ulovemegz and texts me her progress pictures. I'm so proud. I've unloaded a few products on her too, including a completely full 1L of Rusk Smoother leave in. Now that's love! She is SL right now and often gets a little discouraged, so I try to give her as much positive feedback as I can. It's nice having an IRL hair buddy... sometimes I text her to ask if she has moisturized and sealed for the evening. Who else would get that?

 

[Pharmgirl247]

I helped my sister go natural because she had bald spots all over her head from the relaxer. However when her hair reached neck length she slapped a relaxer back in ithwell I tried but a person has to want healthy hair

 

[Dommo]

Woman around my age; Very Easy! Older woman; Impossible (too stuck on the past)

 

[AlliCat]

I have a younger sister and she takes pretty good care of her hair. I see her shampooing, deep conditioning, and moisturizing. Her hair is extremely thick APL in grade 5. Imagine when she gets to high school She uses products in the bathroom which are things that my hair doesn't really like. Which are still pretty great because I generally don't buy crappy products in the first place.

As for my best friend, it was so easy to get her on a hair journey because she saw mine and I even helped her out by giving her some products in my stash.

What's funny is, another good friend of mine (we grew up together) had the longest full SL/APL hair when we were growing up. Now her hair is neck length. She's always asking me what I use and she wants to use everything I do lol. So of course I told her EVERYTHING. She went out and bought a good set of aphogee products (which IMO is a good starter line for damaged hair). So she used the products for a bit but then gave up I try to keep her encouraged