I want and need to get rid of all the guy friends

[Maa Maa omo mti]

I have...

I've realized that I'm the type of person that guys like to be friends with anyways it starts of as relationship or he's interested in me and we end up being friends. I'm just realizing I have a lot of them. I've never been in a relationship where I totally hate my ex so we just end up being friends. Now I'm realizing that this is not helping me. Nothing is going to go any further with these relationships, so why do I continue to accumulate friends?

I need a way to just stop communicating with them I don't want to be mean or rude but I have no use for them.

Help!?

 

[frostydoll]

Good post!!! I'm curious as to what everyone has to say as well. There are very few guys I've dated that I can't stand.

 

[glam-]

I've got this issue, too- so, I hope someone has some insights. In the past, I've stopped contact without explanation- because I feel like it a) leads them on if we hang out and I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings, and b) i felt it keeps me 'open to love' and free from old relationship clutter.
I realize that was not necessarily the best approach, but I hate conflict or anything close to conflict and hurt feelings.

 

[Maa Maa omo mti]

well since no one is answering I guess we must be the minorities ladies. So far I've deleted IM names from my contact list. I've also deleted some number and titled others as ignore. That way I won't make a mistake by picking up. Hope this works.

 

[MzShay]

OMG I swear I could have written this exact same post!!! What I've done in the past is the same as you...delete & block from contact list...take them out the phone *but they keep calling*, label as ignore but end up bored and will dial that number...I just made one big step in purging myself...I created a new IM list minus all the exes/hanger ons, changed my cell phone number for the first time in 4 years and tossed the old phone so I have no way to go "back".

If you find some more ways let me know...good luck!

 

[jade998]

I feel the same way - I am also one of those girls that has loads of guy friends and I can really talk to guys with no problem, But relationship wise, I seem to never find guys that I like, that would like me back, lately.

I feel I am a bit too good for the guys I don't want to date, but maybe not enough for the guys I want to date. Hmmpfff..

But I think that you are doing good. I just stop returing phone calls and layed low for a while, I felt bad and do miss some of them, but it was going more to friends that were on the reserve seat and I was afraid I might get too desperate waiting that I might slip with one of them and that would have been more trouble than I could handle.

 

[jade998]

DOUBLE POST- OOPS

 

[MizzBrown]

Don't burn your bridges. Keep them around for something. May not talk to them for months at a time and that is GREAT but if u need an honest opinion or something in general from someone who already knows you in the biblical sense, then its a plus. Just tell 'em you going through some thangs if they ask why no contact. Keep their number on file somewhere as a backup in case you need them for something.

 

[tt8]

well since no one is answering I guess we must be the minorities ladies. So far I've deleted IM names from my contact list. I've also deleted some number and titled others as ignore. That way I won't make a mistake by picking up. Hope this works.

I believe that if you a)have cleared your past and these relationships don't hinder you from finding love b) aren't in a relationship now and this provokes suspicion or c) you don't keep them around for your own confidence and pride then who cares? BUT if you feel the opposite or have any reservations move on... I can only see this being something that will pass...If they are true friends there isn't a reason to rid them from your life but if not things have a way of working themselves out. HTH

 

[exarreca]

well since no one is answering I guess we must be the minorities ladies. So far I've deleted IM names from my contact list. I've also deleted some number and titled others as ignore. That way I won't make a mistake by picking up. Hope this works.

I have done this with guy and girl friends before. It comes a point in your life where you need to step back and evaluate your surroundings. If these people are not bringing anything to your life, you really don't need to keep them. Hanging on to friendships that aren't making you better or adding to your life could block blessings.

 

[Keen]

Don't burn your bridges. Keep them around for something. May not talk to them for months at a time and that is GREAT but if u need an honest opinion or something in general from someone who already knows you in the biblical sense, then its a plus. Just tell 'em you going through some thangs if they ask why no contact. Keep their number on file somewhere as a backup in case you need them for something.

ITA. You can't change your pass relationships. You just need to prudent with your future relationships. Just reduce your level of communication with them gradually. You never know when you will need to call on them.

IMO, not speaking to these guys will not solve your issue. You need to approach relationship differently in the future. Maybe you need to act more like a girlfriend and not like one of the guys. I'm not saying you do, I'm just trying to see why you always end up being the friend.

 

[BAP28]

i agree with this...

ii changed my number and it felt great and free---now its a fresh start no more--ppl who dont really bring or add anything to my existence...

2 fingers in the air..peaceeeeeeeeeee

I have done this with guy and girl friends before. It comes a point in your life where you need to step back and evaluate your surroundings. If these people are not bringing anything to your life, you really don't need to keep them. Hanging on to friendships that aren't making you better or adding to your life could block blessings.