"I just want to FELLOWSHIP with you"

[Browndilocks]

AAARRRGGGHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!! This is a vent:

I'm so tired of these church negroes all up in my grill!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Can't a young lady just go to bible study in PEACE without having to be practically cornered by a different man every week talking about how they want to "fellowship"?

A mother in the church invited me to her daughter's graduation party a few weeks ago and I made a cheesecake & took it there. There were many members of the church at the party. Now all these different people are asking me to make cheesecakes for them. Okay sure! - not a problem - 20 dollars. Hey, my cheesecakes are yummy

The problem is that every time one of the men pulls me to the side to give me the cash to make the cheesecake for them, they also mention how they'd like to "fellowship" with me outside of church over dinner or breakfast, etc. I just want to yell NOOOOOO!!!!! STAY OUT OF MY FACE!!!!!!! I DON'T WANT TO BE IN THE RUNNING TO BE YOUR WIFE!!!!!! GET AWAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

If I wanted cheesy negroes tryin'a holla at me every minute I can just go to the club, have them buy me a drink and walk away instead of me making a cheesecake and having to look them in their faces again. Sheesh. Now I'm going to have to start telling people I'm not making cheesecakes any more.

 

[pebbles]

LOL! Count your blessings, sis. Many women would love to have a man say they want to "fellowship" with them and don't get that. Keep making those cheesecakes and let the men keep trying to "fellowship" with you. In the midst of all of that, the right one just may make an appearance.

 

[Enchantmt]

I agree. Plus you never know whos watching, your future husband may be observing how you conduct yourself. Its a good thing you arent being taken in by all the smooth lines like many women are because they are coming from someone dressed in a suit. (LOL@the church hookup line...fellowship...I will have to remember that) If thats the case, and he is watching, his esteem and respect for you can only increase and hopefully he has a different line...lol... I know you're frustrated but thanks for the laugh...

 

[NewlyNature12]

So...ummm...could you maybe send one of those cheesecakes down here please?

 

[GodsPromises]

I couldn't agree anymore. You never know who is watching and also remember your cheesecakes may be a blessing to someone so don't stop. Just smile nicely and say in your sweetest voice " No, not now" or I'm not interested and walk away after you get the $ 20.00 for the cheesecake.

I agree. Plus you never know whos watching, your future husband may be observing how you conduct yourself. Its a good thing you arent being taken in by all the smooth lines like many women are because they are coming from someone dressed in a suit. (LOL@the church hookup line...fellowship...I will have to remember that) If thats the case, and he is watching, his esteem and respect for you can only increase and hopefully he has a different line...lol... I know you're frustrated but thanks for the laugh...

 

[victorious]

So...ummm...could you maybe send one of those cheesecakes down here please?

Me too. I'll pay the FedEx charges, Browndilocks.

Some guys are annoying. Three years I had a nut after me when I joined the choir. When it was time to greet everyone, he would be one of the first ones to leave his section and run over to my section to greet me and hold my hand extra long. I had to be respectful while yanking my hand away because the cameras were always focused on the platform and choir.​

He repeatedly invited me out. He enlisted one of the older woman in the church to tell me how nice he is. He also told me that me, my daughter, and him looked like a family. Of course he ran the tired line "God told me in a dream that you and I ..."

Once after singing at another church, we went down to the basement where they had refreshments in a separate room for us. He sat next to me and embarrassed me by declaring his feelings for me out loud. I was so annoyed that I got up and walked away. He told those who heard how much he likes me, and I don't take him seriously. ( He was always smiling up in some single sister's face.)

I now attend a different church within the same church network because it's closer to where I live. Well about two months ago I visited that church again and saw him in the lobby. He respectfully greeted me this time. I guess God showed him in a dream to leave me alone.


​

Back to the topic: When can I get the cheesecake?

 

[Honeyhips]

I'm sorry that sounds like such a line to me. There are still many male snakes, wolves, and hoes in the church. Doesn't sound like someone looking for a wife at all. I wouldn't be surprised if most of the women who wanted this type of attention were desperate to be married. The bible talks about the sipirt of desperation in women and I think it is so prevalent right now.

 

[Koffie]

I'm sorry that sounds like such a line to me. There are still many male snakes, wolves, and hoes in the church. Doesn't sound like someone looking for a wife at all. I wouldn't be surprised if most of the women who wanted this type of attention were desperate to be married. The bible talks about the sipirt of desperation in women and I think it is so prevalent right now.

Are you talking about in 2 Timothy about the weak willed women?

If not, then what scipture is it? TIA

 

[kombov_dymond]

I can relate. I have always sat in the balcony at church, and usually in the center. Well, I noticed that this dude started coming up there to bother me. So, I started getting there early and sitting in the single rows in the corner. By the time he sees me now, I'm on the way to the car...

 

[Browndilocks]

LOL - Thank you ladies for your thoughtful responses.

If I had one of those air-tight food savers, I'd be happy to send you all a cheesecake

 

[ChildlikeEmpress]

I'm so tired of these church negroes all up in my grill!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Can't a young lady just go to bible study in PEACE without having to be practically cornered by a different man every week talking about how they want to "fellowship"?

And from the "Count your blessings" department....

Ohhh, you think that you've got problems? *g* Let me tell you what happened to me recently.

I've had a rather strange and complicated life, and I've spent the majority of it being almost pathologically shy. I now go to a church filled with nice, sincere people; one of them is a young man who always gives me compliments when we run into each other, and who... well... I thought he kind of liked me. I've pretty much been terrified/mistrustful of/angry at men for a long time (growing up with an alcoholic dad can do that for ya, and so can a religion where God is a tyrant who looks an awful lot like alcholic Dad), and I only recently accepted that I do want attention from them. That, at times, I want a man to love me more than almost anything. Maybe that's what scared me most.

Needless to say, I was kind of elated when the aforementioned young man invited me to a Memorial Day picnic one of our Bible study groups was having and offered me a ride -- even though he knows as well as I do that I have a car. I sort of thought this was his "nice guy" way of saying that he wanted to get to know me better, and I took him up on it. And of course, I was giddy as a schoolgirl waiting for her prom.

He showed up late with three of his friends and barely said two words to me. I rode in the back seat.

He barely acknowledged me at the picnic.

He and a friend of mine seemed... very friendly, hugging a lot and flirting. It might've been because they're old friends, but I really don't know anything about how relationships work.

When he drove me home, the guys he came with left with someone else. BUT the girl from the picnic came with us, and I was in the back seat again. And yes, he dropped me off first.

So, if you're ever tempted again at any point in your life to complain about too many men having a romantic interest in you, just read this story and count your blessings. I know it can be annoying to have men hitting on you when you'd rather they didn't, but that grass looks a whole lot greener when you're standing where I am right now. And at the very least, the attention must be somewhat flattering.

~R.

ETA: It hurt a lot when it happened, but I've gotten to the point of being able to see the humor in the situation. I've had kind of a crash course lately in how God can use ANYTHING to accomplish good, even if it doesn't seem particularly good at the time.

 

[bludacious]

I'm sorry that sounds like such a line to me. There are still many male snakes, wolves, and hoes in the church. Doesn't sound like someone looking for a wife at all. I wouldn't be surprised if most of the women who wanted this type of attention were desperate to be married. The bible talks about the sipirt of desperation in women and I think it is so prevalent right now.

Yes, it is a line. A line trying to get this young ladies attention. I see nothing wrong with a man approaching a woman in this manner. At least he/they had a respectful line.

Sweetie, I know you are frustrated but just be careful who you turn away. It just might be your husband, the one that God sent to you!

 

[Honeyhips]

A guy can appear to have the sweetest intention, and say all the right things and can still be a hoe, wolf or a dog. That is all I'm saying. This particular line sounds like a man who is trying to appear to say/do the right things. If he is they type of guy I'm thinking about he has said the line plenty of times before. If he wanted her attention he could have said Hi.

Yes, it is a line. A line trying to get this young ladies attention. I see nothing wrong with a man approaching a woman in this manner. At least he/they had a respectful line.

Sweetie, I know you are frustrated but just be careful who you turn away. It just might be your husband, the one that God sent to you!

@ sweetie.

This is hysterical to me. I should just let men approach me b/c they could potentially be my husband or they are in the church. That could potentially cross the line to looking desperate and easy. There is a difference with being cordial and respectful, and blocking unwanted advances. There is a difference between a guy genuinely wanting to get to know you and trying to come on to you.

My potential husband is not going to come on to me, or feed me some lines. If he does come to me wrong and I don't like it, he will have to change what he is doing. It will take a lot more than words to woe me anyway. My future husband won't let anything stop him from getting to me. And I am not talking about playing games and making a man jump through fiery hoops. I know of many stories from couples where the women was not interested and the man was persistent, b/c he knew without a shadow of doubt that was his wife. I think God is going to let me know what is going on, or at least protect me from predators and I won't have to worry if I'm pushing the wrong guy away. It is not my job, wise, or biblical to worry or wonder if a man is my husband when he approaches me, or to be open to a man because on the surface he appears to be a man of God or is nice.

When did I ever say I was frustrated with men. I love hanging with them and I love the freedom that comes with being single.

 

[bludacious]

A guy can appear to have the sweetest intention, and say all the right things and can still be a hoe, wolf or a dog. That is all I'm saying. This particular line sounds like a man who is trying to appear to say/do the right things. If he is they type of guy I'm thinking about he has said the line plenty of times before. If he wanted her attention he could have said Hi.
@ sweetie.

This is hysterical to me. I should just let men approach me b/c they could potentially be my husband or they are in the church. That could potentially cross the line to looking desperate and easy. There is a difference with being cordial and respectful, and blocking unwanted advances. There is a difference between a guy genuinely wanting to get to know you and trying to come on to you.

My potential husband is not going to come on to me, or feed me some lines. If he does come to me wrong and I don't like it, he will have to change what he is doing. It will take a lot more than words to woe me anyway. My future husband won't let anything stop him from getting to me. And I am not talking about playing games and making a man jump through fiery hoops. I know of many stories from couples where the women was not interested and the man was persistent, b/c he knew without a shadow of doubt that was his wife. I think God is going to let me know what is going on, or at least protect me from predators and I won't have to worry if I'm pushing the wrong guy away. It is not my job, wise, or biblical to worry or wonder if a man is my husband when he approaches me, or to be open to a man because on the surface he appears to be a man of God or is nice.

When did I ever say I was frustrated with men. I love hanging with them and I love the freedom that comes with being single.

Just because a guy ask a woman to have dinner, he is a hoe, wolf, or a dog? Maybe some are but not all of them. A guy or even a woman for that matter could ask someone out. It doesn't necessarily mean they are after something else. If you don't take the time to find out his/her intentions, you will never know!

In response to the statement @sweetie

I wasn't even talking to you. What is your problem? You so quick to jump to conclusion that you fail to notice that I wasn't even talking to you. You also failed to understand the point that I and other members on this board were making.

 

[phynestone]

AAARRRGGGHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!! This is a vent:

I'm so tired of these church negroes all up in my grill!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Can't a young lady just go to bible study in PEACE without having to be practically cornered by a different man every week talking about how they want to "fellowship"?

A mother in the church invited me to her daughter's graduation party a few weeks ago and I made a cheesecake & took it there. There were many members of the church at the party. Now all these different people are asking me to make cheesecakes for them. Okay sure! - not a problem - 20 dollars. Hey, my cheesecakes are yummy

The problem is that every time one of the men pulls me to the side to give me the cash to make the cheesecake for them, they also mention how they'd like to "fellowship" with me outside of church over dinner or breakfast, etc. I just want to yell NOOOOOO!!!!! STAY OUT OF MY FACE!!!!!!! I DON'T WANT TO BE IN THE RUNNING TO BE YOUR WIFE!!!!!! GET AWAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

If I wanted cheesy negroes tryin'a holla at me every minute I can just go to the club, have them buy me a drink and walk away instead of me making a cheesecake and having to look them in their faces again. Sheesh. Now I'm going to have to start telling people I'm not making cheesecakes any more.

I'm not too surprised to hear about this. I can't believe guys actually do this.

Hey Browndilocks, I just want to fellowship with you. We can talk about hair, hair and more hair! (smile)

 

[Poohbear]

I WANNA CHEESECAKE!!!

 

[bludacious]

Brown,


Do you put strawberries on your cheesecake?

 

[Browndilocks]

I'm not too surprised to hear about this. I can't believe guys actually do this.

Hey Browndilocks, I just want to fellowship with you. We can talk about hair, hair and more hair! (smile)

Now THAT'S a fellowship I'd be interested in


Since a few of you are asking, I'll post the cheesecake recipe in a few...

 

[Enchantmt]

Now THAT'S a fellowship I'd be interested in


Since a few of you are asking, I'll post the cheesecake recipe in a few...

I would love you for life. I've been looking for a good cheesecake recipe.


Lets keep things civil, ladies!!

 

[Browndilocks]

Okay Ladies, here it is:




Enjoy,
Browndi

 

[Honeyhips]

I never said all. There is something about when people use the word "just" in situations like that that make me raise my eyebrows. You can usually discern what people are after if you pay attention to what they say and how they approach you.

And I didn't know who you were talking to, so I made a mistake, that happens on the boards, but no I'm not so quick to always jump to conclusions.

I also understood your point, and agree to a certain extent, perhaps you can't see mine.

Just because a guy ask a woman to have dinner, he is a hoe, wolf, or a dog? Maybe some are but not all of them. A guy or even a woman for that matter could ask someone out. It doesn't necessarily mean they are after something else. If you don't take the time to find out his/her intentions, you will never know!

In response to the statement @sweetie

I wasn't even talking to you. What is your problem? You so quick to jump to conclusion that you fail to notice that I wasn't even talking to you. You also failed to understand the point that I and other members on this board were making.

 

[Dare~to~Dream]

Cheesecake factory has NOTHING on me!!

I cannot wait to try your recipe!

 

[bludacious]

I never said all. There is something about when people use the word "just" in situations like that that make me raise my eyebrows. You can usually discern what people are after if you pay attention to what they say and how they approach you.

And I didn't know who you were talking to, so I made a mistake, that happens on the boards, but no I'm not so quick to always jump to conclusions.

I also understood your point, and agree to a certain extent, perhaps you can't see mine.

I see your point. Overall, we agree to disagree!

 

[Browndilocks]

One more thing about the recipe,

For the strawberry/fruit topping, I add just a little bit of flour for a thicker consistency. This way, the topping isn't watery. Don't just scoop some flour and throw it in there, or you'll have lumps.

Take a teaspoon of flour and add water to it to make a paste. Then add some of the juice from the berries in the pan to thin it down a little more. Then add the mixture to the pan and stir thoroughly.

 

[Enchantmt]

This sounds wonderful!! If I can find my pan I will try it this weekend. SMH@ having to wait so long to eat it tho. Why cant I have instant gratification?? Just like a church woman to give up a recipe calling on the virtues of patience and self control... Low carb will have to wait just a lil longer.... Thnx for posting!!!

 

[Bublnbrnsuga]

LOL! Count your blessings, sis. Many women would love to have a man say they want to "fellowship" with them and don't get that. Keep making those cheesecakes and let the men keep trying to "fellowship" with you. In the midst of all of that, the right one just may make an appearance.

Girl you ain't lying! I would be thrilled...'ummm, sista girl, can we fellowship?'

 

[Cinnabuns]

Just because a guy ask a woman to have dinner, he is a hoe, wolf, or a dog? Maybe some are but not all of them. A guy or even a woman for that matter could ask someone out. It doesn't necessarily mean they are after something else. If you don't take the time to find out his/her intentions, you will never know!

I agree Bludacious, this is a very good point.

 

[Mahalialee4]

I luv me some cheese cake and I think I will try it this summer. Bonjour

 

[czyfaith77]

I agree. Plus you never know whos watching, your future husband may be observing how you conduct yourself. Its a good thing you arent being taken in by all the smooth lines like many women are because they are coming from someone dressed in a suit. (LOL@the church hookup line...fellowship...I will have to remember that) If thats the case, and he is watching, his esteem and respect for you can only increase and hopefully he has a different line...lol... I know you're frustrated but thanks for the laugh...

I agree with this too. I deal alot with this too and a wise woman gave me advise similiar to this. It does get on your nerves and you do want to tell em' to raise up and get out of your face (at least that is what I want to say) but hey we have to be approachable or we just might run the right one in the opposite direction. I am still in recovery. This sister here has a look that can just put a brotha' on freeze. I am always told to watch the eyes cause they are very expressive (they work for and against me sometimes).

 

[Crackers Phinn]

It took me about 3 attempts before I had this mastered, but you'd be surprised at the rich quality and wonderful taste this recipe has. Cheesecake factory has NOTHING on me!!

Enjoy,
Browndi

Thanks so much for posting this recipe. I really do plan on trying it out, but since it takes 3 days I'ma have to go on over to the Cheesecake Factory TODAY to satisfy this sudden urge I have sweet cream cheese goodness!