I just don't understand some females!

[tinkat]

I am transitioning to natural hair and have not had a relaxer since July 30, 2005. To help me transition, i have been wearing sew-ins which i absolutely love and get lots of compliments. My hair has been doing fine, but i have noticed that females that i have taken alot of classes with during my college career talking about my weave. One girl in particular goes out her way to tell people that i wear a weave and that my hair was short before I got one. Even though length does not matter, my hair was actually shoulder length, i guess because her hair is past her shoulders, she considers my hair short. I just think it is so petty how some females can be, it seems like ever since ive gotten the weave, i have started getting haters. One time, i even overheard her say that she did not like a person because they wear weave....i was like, how stupid is that ( I wouldn't be surprised if she was talking about me). And the funny thing about is that right after i got my first straight sew in, she sent me this email through facebook, a college social site, telling me that she was doing a project on how weave has a big impact on our society and asked me for my input and i nicely replied back.

I just had to vent because this has been bothering me for a while.

 

[caligirl]

The whole point of the weave is that it looks like your hair. She doesn't need to go around telling people that's not your hair. What a B*.

 

[Nita81]

I checked out your fotki....you're hair looks great!!!!

Some people are just a$$holes pointblank. I would just act like what she says doesn't phase you. She'll eventually leave it alone since she's not getting a response out of you.

 

[Isis]

I'm sorry to hear this has happened to you. Unfortunately in this society, there are females of all ages who get a kick out of putting other females down. Usually they have little to no self-esteem and so they get their temporary sensation of "power" in this way.

When I encounter people like this, I cut off all contact with them and their negativity.

 

[Plenty]

I understand females, reaseach human behaviors. u'll get

now on your hair...

Why bother growing it when your weave's this good?

Girl your hair is the bomb!

 

[Healthb4Length]

I checked out your album and your hair looks great! Don't listen to haters because their main objective is to tear you down!

 

[DDTexlaxed]

I actually let some haters sway me from my natural journey. The result was that I was unhappy w/ my hair and myself. Surround yourself with positive people who support you and respect you. I did that and now am happily nappy again. Your hair is beautiful. The girl is prob jealous of you. She's petty and is not even worth your time.

 

[tinkat]

Thanks everyone for the compliments and support. I usually don't pay anyone any mind and keep myself around positive people.

 

[balisi]

Don't worry about it, tinkat. When you don't think ill of others as they do, it is hard to understand such behaviors. Just do your thing and keep it moving.

 

[facets]

it seems like weave, or even one's own healthy hair can be a hater magnet. I've had people accuse me of dying my hair because it's black. Some of my own relatives thought they were calling me out. Of course, the ringleaders both have brown hair.(which i always wanted strangely enough)

When it grew to shoulder length years ago, I was called fake because my hair is fairly thick.

then when i actually got a weave, a *homeless* guy tried to clown me at the muni bus stop. yelling 'hey you, that ain't your hair, hey i know you hear me.." etc when i moved away. this fool was pathetic, busted, down & out but felt entitle to crack on me.

you have to just ignore fools. hair is so emotionally charged that extensions/weave is seen as cheating(like hair is a freakin' 'test'?! lol)...so she's playing the tattle-tale.

you're trying to protect and grow your own, please don't let that idiot(who's prob too chicken to get a weave herself) ruin your plan. when your hair is super-long there will prolly be fools feeling for tracks. just keep on keepin' on. you look cute!

 

[NYKittin]

your post was so funny and very accurate. I can't believe that bum tried to call you out. That happened to me before but the bum called me a "nappy headed" *****.

 

[beyondcute]

Aww youre os sweet! I would have called her out her name Youre a very kind person to allow her to alk about you like that. COntinue what youre doing and ignore her. She a hater. SHe is insecure about herself and THAT is why she feels the need to talk about you. By the way I checked your fotki and you sew in is newat and pretty. She HAS to be a hater. Please ignore her and conitue growing your hair out. Even if you DID have really long hair she would still be a hater.

 

[CinnaMocha]

Some people can just be so triflin'. She shouldn't give a rat's a$$ what you do to your hair. And the fact that she's making obvious mention says alot about her character. She probably would have a problem with you no matter what you do, and she is just using that fact that you wear a weave as a crutch for her "groupies" to give her an ear. The moment she steps out of line I say you give her the riot act!

 

[*ElleB]

I concur with the other posters and especially with Kaybeegee...When ppl wear weaves society sees it as a form of self-hate, or just plain fakeness. THat obviously is not the case with you, because you are TRYING TO GROW YOUR OWN HAIR with its aide. She prolly thinks that you were trying fake like it was urs and was fancying herself the whistle-blower....Shame on her, Y she feels that she needs to be sooo damned concerned with wat's in your head is beyond me....THis chicks needs to do more than stop hating, she NEEDS TO GET A LIFE!

 

[facets]

your post was so funny and very accurate. I can't believe that bum tried to call you out. That happened to me before but the bum called me a "nappy headed" *****.

there was another derelict on montgomery street who was always in a doorway, he was constantly talking stuff about my weave as i passed. then when i went natural he had the nerve to laugh. psycho. i'm all for volunteering and helping folks but i did say to myself more than once. ' see, that's why your *** is on the street!'

 

[glamazon386]

Wow girls are so petty. She's a hater. And I'm mad that she hit you up on facebook about your weave. Why couldn't she ask you in person if it's that serious? That jerk was trying to be funny. I don't see why some people think that just because you wear a weave you're bald headed. People don't realize that some people wear weaves for a reason. I'm wearing one to grow my hair out and also so I don't have to worry about it while I'm on campus. I tried the braid thing freshman year and it tore my hair up. Oh yeah, and why do people have so much animosity towards weaves and not braids? Aren't they the same thing? Braids with extensions are obviously fake. And people walk around with braids down to their butt and no one has a problem. But let me get some BSL weave and I'm bald headed and think I'm cute. WTF?!? Keep swinging that hair girl. It's gorgeous. Oh yeah, btw what school are you at?

 

[tinkat]

Wow girls are so petty. She's a hater. And I'm mad that she hit you up on facebook about your weave. Why couldn't she ask you in person if it's that serious? That jerk was trying to be funny. I don't see why some people think that just because you wear a weave you're bald headed. People don't realize that some people wear weaves for a reason. I'm wearing one to grow my hair out and also so I don't have to worry about it while I'm on campus. I tried the braid thing freshman year and it tore my hair up. Oh yeah, and why do people have so much animosity towards weaves and not braids? Aren't they the same thing? Braids with extensions are obviously fake. And people walk around with braids down to their butt and no one has a problem. But let me get some BSL weave and I'm bald headed and think I'm cute. WTF?!? Keep swinging that hair girl. It's gorgeous. Oh yeah, btw what school are you at?

I completely agree with you. I go to University of West Georgia about 50 miles from atlanta.

 

[cocoberry10]

I'm sorry to hear this has happened to you. Unfortunately in this society, there are females of all ages who get a kick out of putting other females down. Usually they have little to no self-esteem and so they get their temporary sensation of "power" in this way.

When I encounter people like this, I cut off all contact with them and their negativity.

Isis, you told the truth! I have been wearing my hair in buns almost everyday. When blown out (the last 2 relaxers I've had underprocessed my hair, and I went 34 weeks w/o a relaxer, so I've got almost 5 inches of "natural" looking hair), my hair is at armpit length I would really like to get all my hair to brastrap, and think protective styling is my sacrifice.

Anyway, there are two young ladies in my class (one looks biracial, the other may or may not be) who I overheard making a comment about my hair. I'm thinking, does my hairstyle bother you? It's not doing you any harm. Nor does my hair look a hot mess. It's in a bun, slicked back, and only if you are extremely close up (I mean all up on me) can you see that my hair is not straight. In the back it's a little more "curly" but still you can't really tell unless you are THISCLOSE.

Honestly, I just think some people try to put others down to make themselves feel better. Haters are everywhere! I'm glad you wrote this, because I was beginning to feel frustrated by those girls, but now I know I'm not crazy. Sometimes you just need to vent and that's what we are all here for!