I can't compete....

ALWAYZL8

ALWAYZL8

Member
with the casino!!! :swearing:

Would it bother you if your SO spent a lot of his free time in the casino.

Story: BF likes to play poker...Texas Hold'em. He can play for 16 hours straight. He has stayed at the casino overnight. The first time it happen, I went off! The second time it happened, I went to the casino and threw his house keys on the poker table and said goodbye. It stopped for a few months. We agreed that I could go to the club once a month and he could go to the casino...and be home before 2am. He just said forget it and stopped going. I went out of town to visit a high school friend and he picked up the casino again. Now he's back for coming in at 6am and standing me up. I went up there to see for myself. His only reply is..."Let me make this money". He's not coming back with enough money for the hours spent in the casino. We only have the weekends together and we work opposite schedules during the week. I went back to my own house out of frustration, but he has no idea where I am at the moment.

Do you ladies have any other tactics I can try? Compromising with him did not work and I'm getting REAL tired.
 
He has a gambling addiction. It's worse than drugs for some people. Run the other direction. Anyone that can spend 16 hours in a casino and blow off all their other responsibilities to do so needs help. He loves the casino more than you. You deserve better.
 
Now ya'll know I asked him if he has an addiction to gambling and he got pissed and told me no. After I typed out my situation I began to realize that this will mean trouble if we marry. I don't want to lose my home and my car because he cares so much for the poker table at the casino. I've seen it happen...not pretty. I don't want that to be me.
 
I'd let him go. You both couldn't have a good future together if he's wasting all the money on gambling and his time too.
 
There is NOTHING YOU CAN DO. :nono: This addiction is no joke. He will need to see there is a problem.

My godmom has a gambling problem so I know all too well what's ahead for you.
1800Gambler website has a list of questions you can ask him to see how bad the addiction is. He maybe able to try a simple withdrawl plan but forewarned it gets ugly.
It's almost as if they have to hit ROCK BOTTOM for them to see there's a problem.

It's on him to start the process of getting well. Remember you've done nothing wrong.
 
Gambling is a serious vice. I don't want to compete with it at all. What will happen to both of your finances to fuel this addiction? :(
 
To answer your question:
Would it bother you if your SO spent a lot of his free time in the casino?
Yes, that would be very annoying to me, plus I hate gambling. He does not seem interested in stopping so there's really nothing you can do. And I cannot deal with my guy staying out all night, just doesn't sit right with me.
 
You are correct....you can't compete with it. This is an addiction that HE needs to beat.


I don't know any tactics to tell; all I can say is that I couldn't deal with an addict of any kind.
 
He's a gambling addict. Run away before you end up broke and homeless. Gambling is a serious addiction and he doesn't even have the realization that he's an addict which is not good
 
OP there's no way you can compete with an addiction. No matter how vehemently he denies it, he is addicted. How many addicts do you think actually admit they're addicted to something? I bet very few do.

The only thing you can do in this situation is take care of your own interests. He's pretty much a lost cause for now until 1.) he's willing to admit to his addiction 2.) take concrete, measurable steps to getting rid of this addiction.

Either way, there is no reason for you to subject yourself to his lies and lack of consideration. You deserve better OP :)
 
Etherealsmile said:
OP there's no way you can compete with an addiction. No matter how vehemently he denies it, he is addicted. How many addicts do you think actually admit they're addicted to something? I bet very few do.

The only thing you can do in this situation is take care of your own interests. He's pretty much a lost cause for now until 1.) he's willing to admit to his addiction 2.) take concrete, measurable steps to getting rid of this addiction.

Either way, there is no reason for you to subject yourself to his lies and lack of consideration. You deserve better OP :)
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Thanks. It's so sad because he sees nothing wrong, but he's quick to turn the tables on me and talk about me going out with girlfriends...but I'm in by midnight on those rare occasions. WOW! Midnight and 6am...huge difference!
 
Is he legit making money playing poker or is he a degenerate gambler?

I ask because I know a group of 20-something professional poker players who play in the World Series of Poker and have big bank account$$. They bet low and are highly skilled, so I don't consider them degenerates because of this plus the average money they make per hand vs buy-in.
 
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