I am not happy with my hair thread-

[Junonia]

Ladies I have to vent. I can't see myself making MB in 08. I am struggling to make BSL by 12/07. I have to trim to keep my hair from looking straggly. The last relaxer I had in June, I had to cut an inch. I just cut 1/2 inch on Saturday and I feel like I am still at the same length.

No matter how much I baby my ends, I still need to trim. My hair does not look as full and healthy as it did in the beginning of the year. My nape is still a hot mess and I am not happy. I no longer enjoy my hair.

I am going to continue with my BSL goal. If my hair continues to look sickly, then it makes no sense to grow to MBL. I will probably cut but at least I know I was able to make it to BSL. I would rather have SL to APL healthy, full hair instead of having long strands of lifeless, thin hair.

 

[God's Anointed]

Hey, I feel you on this issue. It's frustrating to know that I've been at what seems like APL forever. I just feel like throwing up my red flag and quitting but I guess I'll just have healthy APL hair that prayerfully will get thicker soon

 

[Junonia]

Hey, I feel you on this issue. It's frustrating to know that I've been at what seems like APL forever. I just feel like throwing up my red flag and quitting but I guess I'll just have healthy APL hair that prayerfully will get thicker soon

As much as I would like to have longer hair, I don't want to sacrifice fullness for length. My hair seemed very healthy at APL.

 

[blazingthru]

Ladies I have to vent. I can't see myself making MB in 08. I am struggling to make BSL by 12/07. I have to trim to keep my hair from looking straggly. The last relaxer I had in June, I had to cut an inch. I just cut 1/2 inch on Saturday and I feel like I am still at the same length.

No matter how much I baby my ends, I still need to trim. My hair does not look as full and healthy as it did in the beginning of the year. My nape is still a hot mess and I am not happy. I no longer enjoy my hair.

I am going to continue with my BSL goal. If my hair continues to look sickly, then it makes no sense to grow to MBL. I will probably cut but at least I know I was able to make it to BSL. I would rather have SL to APL healthy, full hair instead of having long strands of lifeless, thin hair.

What styles are you wearing your hair, Have you consider trying something different or get your hair in a ponytail ( a cute one for while ) where you don't see your hair and give it a chance to rest. Do you coat your hair at night maybe try some form of butter to coat your ends at night. Try the opposite of what you been doing for a month and see if that has a new affect on your hair. I havent' been consistent about taking care of my ends at all I recently cut 1/4 inch off all around and started putting red palm butter on the ends and I feel better about that I can feel the difference when I slide my fingers down to the ends. My hair is never down, never to nervous. I wear a pony puff pretty much every day or a I put a clip in the back and keep it up. It never rubs on anything but the bonet I wear around the house even when I am watching TV.

 

[blazingthru]

Okay only for the picture in my siggy I wore it down that one day and thats it it wasn't even down all day I got so nervous and plus it was already shrinking up anyway.

 

[Junonia]

What styles are you wearing your hair, Have you consider trying something different or get your hair in a ponytail ( a cute one for while ) where you don't see your hair and give it a chance to rest. Do you coat your hair at night maybe try some form of butter to coat your ends at night. Try the opposite of what you been doing for a month and see if that has a new affect on your hair. I havent' been consistent about taking care of my ends at all I recently cut 1/4 inch off all around and started putting red palm butter on the ends and I feel better about that I can feel the difference when I slide my fingers down to the ends. My hair is never down, never to nervous. I wear a pony puff pretty much every day or a I put a clip in the back and keep it up. It never rubs on anything but the bonet I wear around the house even when I am watching TV.

I am planning to braid my hair Friday in cornrows. I am hoping that this will give my broken edges, nape, crown some recovery time. I know this probably why my hair feels so thin because of the breakage.

 

[luvmesumhair]

Ladies I have to vent. I can't see myself making MB in 08. I am struggling to make BSL by 12/07. I have to trim to keep my hair from looking straggly. The last relaxer I had in June, I had to cut an inch. I just cut 1/2 inch on Saturday and I feel like I am still at the same length.

No matter how much I baby my ends, I still need to trim. My hair does not look as full and healthy as it did in the beginning of the year. My nape is still a hot mess and I am not happy. I no longer enjoy my hair.

I am going to continue with my BSL goal. If my hair continues to look sickly, then it makes no sense to grow to MBL. I will probably cut but at least I know I was able to make it to BSL. I would rather have SL to APL healthy, full hair instead of having long strands of lifeless, thin hair.

Girl, I was just admiring your Fotki and I LOVE YOUR HAIR. Your hair looks so healthy and long. I do not see what you are talking about re your hair looking straggly. As far as your nape is concerned, I would recommend giving ponytails a break, moisturizing that area good and wearing your hair in low styles (up in a clip for example) as opposed to just wearing it out (you mentioned your ends not looking so good at this moment. That is why I am suggesting "low styles".) Also, maybe you should shorten your stretches to maybe two months? Do you notice your hair shedding a lot when you are stretching? If so, maybe that is why your ends look straggley? ( I personally think your ends look fine )

Please do not give up!!!

 

[Quest4healthyhair]

Dear I need hair,
I don't want to discourage you, but sometimes you have to know and accpet your limitations. I did a thread about this 3 weeks ago, because the longer my hair gets, the thinner it gets and I didn't want to claim BSL with 2 strands of hair. LOL. Do you get what I'm saying ? The middle of my hair is breaking and my nape is a hot mess too. I think I have accepted that I will never make it to BSL and I'm content with that. I'm stiving for healthy and full APL and I'm ok with that. I just have to figure out how to get this middle and nape to grow. Good Luck and if you want to have a nape challenge between us two, let me know.

 

[hopeful]

Well, overall I think your hair looks very pretty. You are right, it looks great at APL, full and healthy looking. For now maybe think about stretching for shorter lengths. Focus on babying your edges, nape and crown, don't worry about reaching BSL for now. Focus on healing your trouble spots, then go from there. Your hair is just lovely at APl and I bet eventually you will be able to reach bsl. Good luck sweetie. I'm sorry you aren't happy with your hair right now. (((hugs)))

 

[Junonia]

Girl, I was just admiring your Fotki and I LOVE YOUR HAIR. Your hair looks so healthy and long. I do not see what you are talking about re your hair looking straggly. As far as your nape is concerned, I would recommend giving ponytails a break, moisturizing that area good and wearing your hair in low styles (up in a clip for example) as opposed to just wearing it out (you mentioned your ends not looking so good at this moment. That is why I am suggesting "low styles".) Also, maybe you should shorten your stretches to maybe two months? Do you notice your hair shedding a lot when you are stretching? If so, maybe that is why your ends look straggley? ( I personally think your ends look fine )

Please do not give up!!!

Thank you Luvme, I haven't post any new pics because of the HYH hair challenge. When I do, you will surely see the difference. I have been considering doing two month stretches after I finish with the braids. The braids will give my hair a rest.

 

[Junonia]

Quest, I am with you and I understand what you mean about the thinning. If you want to do that challenge, I am down.

Hopeful-Thank you, I may cut in January and start new. As long as my hair is healthy, I am very happy.

 

[Well_Coiffed]

Ineed,

First off your hair is gorgeous! However, I have been exactly where you are. You didn’t post anything about your regimen. So I don’t know if you are doing or have done any of the things I am about to suggest. After looking through your fotki, appears that your problem areas occur around the relaxer application lines (sectioned front to back and ear to ear).

Try having those areas left last in the relaxer application. That way the relaxer will be there for the least amount of time. Also, do you take vitamins, eat plenty fruits and veggies?

You may also need to rotate maintenance products, your hair could have built up a resistance to them.

Are you deep conditioning weekly?

This is what worked for me and I have 3c/4a type hair. After microbraids broke off the edge on one side of my head, I used the ORS temple balm. It takes a few months of consistent use before you notice it’s working, but it does. I also had a bald spot in the nape area that struggled for a couple of years to grow until I started “custom blending.” My deep conditioner was a mix of moisturizing and protein conditioners. My stylist started me with Mizani’s Custom Blend 4 times a year and that spot just shot right out. Since this service cost as much as a touch up, I started doing it at home as a maintenance with alterations, of course. Now that area grows faster than the rest of my hair and my edges have consistently been growing out and thickening up - almost full.

Maybe this will work for you.

HTH

PM me if you need specifics.

 

[ChanelNo5]

Hello Ineedhair,

I decided to come out of lurkdom to respond to your vent because your hair reminds me A LOT of my own. When I first saw your album I thought we were hair twins! Not to mention I was/am going through almost the exact thing you are right now. Anyway, I do have a couple suggestions for you.

Firstly, I noticed in your regimen a lack of consistent protein. I had come to a point in my journey where I thought I had it all under control and stopped with regular protein conditioners/treatments and really tried to focus on moisture and softness. After a couple months I noticed more breakage than usual, mostly my ends, and I had to go back to the basics. For me that was deep conditioning with my most proven protein conditioner UBH for 30 min w/heat EVERY 3-5 DAYS followed by an instant moisturizing conditioner(optional). I also reincorporated the hardcore protein in there too (aphogee) every 6-8 weeks. I realized that it's about consistency and MAINTENANCE. As a relaxed 4a/b I now understand I will have to use reconstructors for the rest of my hair's life no matter how well it's doing.

Secondly, the nape. If ANYBODY understands it's me. When I started I had NO hair back there. I could part my hair in the back up to my ears and there was NOTHING there, just hard, dry, kinky fuzz. And it stayed that way for at least 2 years. My advice would be 1) stretch relaxer applications back there, I see you're already stretching but maybe you could do that area every other touch up. My motto is I have to be able to SEE it and GRAB it to relax. 2) ABSOLUTELY NO BRUSHING BACK THERE, and low protective styles. I used to wear a high pony tail all the time and brush the hair up....I brushed my hair OFF.

Lastly, ends and edges. Once again, if you're using a brush to finish your protective styles PUT IT DOWN. I constantly put myself through a vicious cycle of growing my edges and then brushing them off. I know stretching makes it hard to not smooth the front with something but trust me this is not the way. Try aveda control paste or some other molding wax. Also surge helped my edges a great deal. As far as the ends go, we all go through it. Look at some of the super long haired goddesses on this board and you will see that many of them at one point or another had to do a major trim or went through a phase of trying to get over a thin-end hump. I myself plan on trying castor oil, and reevaluating some of my protective styles.

Sorry so long, ((HUGS))

 

[Junonia]

Ineed,

First off your hair is gorgeous! However, I have been exactly where you are. You didn’t post anything about your regimen. So I don’t know if you are doing or have done any of the things I am about to suggest. After looking through your fotki, appears that your problem areas occur around the relaxer application lines (sectioned front to back and ear to ear).

Try having those areas left last in the relaxer application. That way the relaxer will be there for the least amount of time. Also, do you take vitamins, eat plenty fruits and veggies?

You may also need to rotate maintenance products, your hair could have built up a resistance to them.

Are you deep conditioning weekly?

This is what worked for me and I have 3c/4a type hair. After microbraids broke off the edge on one side of my head, I used the ORS temple balm. It takes a few months of consistent use before you notice it’s working, but it does. I also had a bald spot in the nape area that struggled for a couple of years to grow until I started “custom blending.” My deep conditioner was a mix of moisturizing and protein conditioners. My stylist started me with Mizani’s Custom Blend 4 times a year and that spot just shot right out. Since this service cost as much as a touch up, I started doing it at home as a maintenance with alterations, of course. Now that area grows faster than the rest of my hair and my edges have consistently been growing out and thickening up - almost full.

Maybe this will work for you.

HTH

PM me if you need specifics.

Thank you Well_Coiffed. My edges are actually growing. I've been sleeping with my scarf consistently everynight and I am now retaining length. My nape and my crown continues to break. I found some new breakage in the crown yesterday at the demarcation line.

I am not consistent with my regimen. I'll wash every week for a month and then I'll get lazy and wash twice a month. I have been using Salerm wheat germ or Alter Ego DC. I am not sure as to what is causing my break. Rollersets, maybe?? I am going to stop stretching for three months and do for two. I know I have to be consistent. I don't take vitamins and my fruits and veggies but not as much as I should.

During my last relaxer, the nape and the edges were done last and left in for the shortest amount of time. I am going to post more breakage photos in my fotki next week so you can really get an idea of what my breakage is like.

 

[Junonia]

Hello Ineedhair,

I decided to come out of lurkdom to respond to your vent because your hair reminds me A LOT of my own. When I first saw your album I thought we were hair twins! Not to mention I was/am going through almost the exact thing you are right now. Anyway, I do have a couple suggestions for you.

Firstly, I noticed in your regimen a lack of consistent protein. I had come to a point in my journey where I thought I had it all under control and stopped with regular protein conditioners/treatments and really tried to focus on moisture and softness. After a couple months I noticed more breakage than usual, mostly my ends, and I had to go back to the basics. For me that was deep conditioning with my most proven protein conditioner UBH for 30 min w/heat EVERY 3-5 DAYS followed by an instant moisturizing conditioner(optional). I also reincorporated the hardcore protein in there too (aphogee) every 6-8 weeks. I realized that it's about consistency and MAINTENANCE. As a relaxed 4a/b I now understand I will have to use reconstructors for the rest of my hair's life no matter how well it's doing.

Secondly, the nape. If ANYBODY understands it's me. When I started I had NO hair back there. I could part my hair in the back up to my ears and there was NOTHING there, just hard, dry, kinky fuzz. And it stayed that way for at least 2 years. My advice would be 1) stretch relaxer applications back there, I see you're already stretching but maybe you could do that area every other touch up. My motto is I have to be able to SEE it and GRAB it to relax. 2) ABSOLUTELY NO BRUSHING BACK THERE, and low protective styles. I used to wear a high pony tail all the time and brush the hair up....I brushed my hair OFF.

Lastly, ends and edges. Once again, if you're using a brush to finish your protective styles PUT IT DOWN. I constantly put myself through a vicious cycle of growing my edges and then brushing them off. I know stretching makes it hard to not smooth the front with something but trust me this is not the way. Try aveda control paste or some other molding wax. Also surge helped my edges a great deal. As far as the ends go, we all go through it. Look at some of the super long haired goddesses on this board and you will see that many of them at one point or another had to do a major trim or went through a phase of trying to get over a thin-end hump. I myself plan on trying castor oil, and reevaluating some of my protective styles.

Sorry so long, ((HUGS))

Thanks Chanel for coming out of lurkdom. I am def. going to try the bolded. My edges are finally growing which is a plus. I don't think my edges have been this long since the 5th grade.

 

[hot_pepper96]

Ladies I have to vent. I can't see myself making MB in 08. I am struggling to make BSL by 12/07. I have to trim to keep my hair from looking straggly. The last relaxer I had in June, I had to cut an inch. I just cut 1/2 inch on Saturday and I feel like I am still at the same length.

No matter how much I baby my ends, I still need to trim. My hair does not look as full and healthy as it did in the beginning of the year. My nape is still a hot mess and I am not happy. I no longer enjoy my hair.

I am going to continue with my BSL goal. If my hair continues to look sickly, then it makes no sense to grow to MBL. I will probably cut but at least I know I was able to make it to BSL. I would rather have SL to APL healthy, full hair instead of having long strands of lifeless, thin hair.

I just looked at your fotki and your hair is beautiful. I feel your pain. I also have to trim when my ends look a mess and I do feel like my hair is thinning out as well. It's grown to be the longest that it has ever been (A little past brastrap), but it's lifeless and alot finer than it used to be. I was thinking of cutting layers into my hair again and cutting of some serious inches and just start over. Also, my edges and nape is suffering. Do you go to the salon? Maybe a consultation will give you some ideas on what to do.


Also, maybe consider reducing your stretching period. I know for sure I experience alot of breakge when I take to long to relax. I get lazy with the washing my hair too.

 

[Candy_C]

visualise your hair being its target, length/thickness whatever and do everything you can to remain calm and positive


your hair will thrive when you leave it alone

sorry this message is so short, its bedtime for me!

Cherie

 

[aurora3140]

INeedHair,

I really understand what you're going through. I trimmed twice during my last stretch and again at touch-up time. I was frustrated because even though I kept trimming, my hair still looked thin .

One day, I was rollersetting my hair, and I noticed that I only needed two rollers for the middle row in the back, while I was using three on both side rows in the back (if that makes sense). I realized that that section of my hair was thin and when I examined that area of my scalp, I noticed a lot of shorter hairs.

I understand now that this is the cause for my thinness. Once this area grows out, I'm confident that my hair will get fuller. I've stopped trimming and I'm concentrating on growing out the middle-back of my hair.

Maybe this is your case as well. You said that you have breakage in your crown. Once that area grows, you should notice your hair regaining its fullness . I don't remember who, but one member here advocates allowing shorter hairs to "catch up" and doing occasional dusting rather than overall trims.

I really hope this helps and I'm sorry for writing so much .

 

[Junonia]

Thank you ladies for your support. I am glad I am not the only one that feels this way. After I take out my braids, I'll see if I am satisfied with my hair and I will take it from there.

 

[tyrablu]

Ineedhair,

We must be twins or something cause I am going through the same issues. My hair is just not what it used to be and I am seriously considering cutting it again and starting over. Today someone saw my edges and asked if I had been braiding my hair cause it was so short and broken off.

O well I am giving myself two more weeks to decided if I want to continue to try with my hair in its current state, or do a b/c and start fresh.

But just take it one day at a time. I know that's all I can do.

Don't get too discouraged. ((((Hugs)))) for you.