how do you.....

[legs71]

tactfully approach friends or family with hair advice if you see their hair is badly damaged? Yesterday I saw my best friend I've known since we were 12. Her hair is a decent length, but her hairline around her forehead has receded a great deal and her ends are very chewed up looking. My mother has always had short hair which appears as if it never grows. I know her hair grows, but it sheds and breaks off horribly. She uses curling irons frequently and still greases her scalp(she's from the south). I have tried to educate my mother on the tips I have learned from this board, but it goes in one ear and out the other. Any suggestions on how I can recommend suggestions to my loved ones without coming off offensive?

 

[Julia]

Maybe you could offer them some pampering...perhaps do their hair for them, and let them see how wonderful it will feel after your're finished. Maybe that will spark thier interest and they may want to mimick a part or all of your regime? Or it could back fire on you and they may expect you to become thier personal hairdresser /images/graemlins/blush.gif

just an idea...

 

[Ennyaa]

I've found the best thing I can do is lead by example. Taking control of my own hair health has inspired people. I also offered to do my sister's hair for her and after YEARS of going to the same salon weekly she has just agreed to cancel her standing appointment. (THANK GOD cuz they were NOT taking care of her hair properly.) When she saw how healthy my hair was when I last took my braids out and how much it had grown it made her ask more questions and listen to me more. So the best thing to do is be a shining example of hair health and they will come to you.

 

[legs71]

Ennyaa
I wear braids back to back on natural hair so I rarely see what my hair looks like. Last time I took out my braids(I keep them in for 3 months and touch them up in between to keep them looking nice).My mother kept commenting on how thick and long my hair had gotten. Prior to this she had been making comments about all the vitamins I take. My best friend whose hair was always longer than mine brags about how fast her hair grows without her doing a thing to it. As long as I remember she has always done this, but I ignore it. Funny because now my hair is quickly approachiing her length, but that's my little secret. Last April she went with me to get my hair braided in the Bronx and it was the 1st time she had saw my own hair in a long time. She barely commented, she just looked. Hopefully, this summer I'll be able to shock everyone and take the world by storm(particularly my best friend)and have my hopefully midback hair blown out and pressed. You bet your booty hell or high water I will make sure my best friend accompanies me. /images/graemlins/grin.gif

 

[Ennyaa]

HAHAHAHAHA. Yeah girl I too can't wait for the day when the health and length of my hair will shut some people up. Nobody likes rude comments but seeing the Green-Eyed Monster in other people's eyes is often a sign that you must be doing something right! I'm hoping my fiance's comments about all the pills I take (he calls me the vitamin lady) will cease once he sees how long my hair has gotten. I figure somewhere around June he'll have nothing more to say cuz he'll be too busy playin in my hair. /images/graemlins/grin.gif

 

[Paris Belle]

I was wondering that myself. I want to say something, but don't know how. My own mother thinks I am a fanatic. /images/graemlins/smirk.gif

 

[HippyChick]

Hi Legs. I would try to start a conversation on hair and ask a few ?'s to see what they are thinking like "what kind of products are you using?". Also, I use grease and I am from the South, but My hair will shed badly if I don't use grease. I think it also have to do with the type of products one uses. I put water in my grease for moisture and I use a curling iron. But, I would try the conversation route and if that does not work, well at least you tried.