How do you write an interesting online dating profile?

Have someone help you with it that knows you. We don't see ourselves as well as others do.
 
Focus on what you do want, not all of the things you don't want. It makes you more approachable and still does a good job of weeding people out.
 
hairlove said:
Do tell...

No matter what suggestions I read, when I try to write mine out, it just sounds so boring.
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Hmm, all you need is a cute pic. Men aren't really reading your profile. lol

But back to your profile, if it sounds boring, you have to ask yourself, am I boring? Would I want to date me? What makes me a desirable mate? What life experiences have I enjoyed that are worth telling others about?

Seriously decide if you can add anything to what you have already written. Make sure you include lots of verbs and use very few passive phrases.

If you stated everything about yourself and it truly is boring, then it is time to shake things up. Go on a trip, take a dancing class, get out of your element and then come back and write about it.

The guys that I hang out with (date) all are having the times of their life. Just this week, one went to South Beach for a yoga camp and the other guy went to NYC to "hang out" with old college buddies, all on the spur of the moment. Of course, they also had to go on job interviews as well, but they managed to have fun along the way. While I couldn't go on any trip and have been working the whole time. Both talked to me frequently when they first left, but after Sunday night, no more calls or texts, they are living it up! And here I am talking to you online inbetween work, I need a vacation. LOL

I'm almost jealous already of what stories they'll tell me when they finally come back. The best I could come up to do was go to the opera next week. I'm excited because I've always wanted to go and I finally get to dress up and feel all cultured.lol

Please take time to enjoy yourself and then use that in your profile. :)
 
Yeah, I do have stories, etc but I've read that my profile should be no longer than 150 words to describe myself and 100 to describe who I'm looking for.

How do you say anything interesting and enough in that? I guess I should pick out THE most interesting things about me and talk about that?
 
hairlove said:
Yeah, I do have stories, etc but I've read that my profile should be no longer than 150 words to describe myself and 100 to describe who I'm looking for.

How do you say anything interesting and enough in that? I guess I should pick out THE most interesting things about me and talk about that?
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Be fun and carefree in your profile. Try to show off your sense of humor. Here's an example of my profile from POF. I've gotten a lot of compliments and interest from it, so take it for what you will.

These and those I do suppose. I'm into a little bit of everything. If I'm not into it, I'm more than likely to give it a try at least once. I can be pretty shameless so public embarassment isn't a problem for me. No one can be good at everything, but that's no reason not to do as much as possible. When I'm not at work I can be found running through the streets of Grand Rapids (literally), dancing at 80s night, reading at Barnes & Noble or Schuler's, watching football or basketball at a sports bar, or restaurant hopping around town. As much as I like all that Grand Rapids has to offer I like getting out of town even more. NYC is my happy place and I'm there as much as possible.

For the last six years I've made my career in consumer goods sales. Grad school has been calling me for a little while now, so I'm going to answer this fall. My goal is to earn a Masters in Communication. I'll figure out what I'm going to do with it while I'm getting it. Figuring out life as it happens is part of the fun.

I get asked what I look for in a guy quite often. My answer is always the same: I know it when I see. While I'm pretty open there are some things that definitely sway the liking. Intelligence is sexy and I have a thing for guys with a little (okay, a lot) of geek in them. Good conversation is like chocolate...I can never have too much. The best ones start from practically nothing and go so many places you have to ask, "how did we get on this topic?" Getting to know someone shouldn't feel like a job interview.

Dry wit and a healthy sense of humor go very far with me as well. A working knowledge of 80s/90s pop culture also comes in handy. I constantly reference movies, TV shows, songs, and other miscellaneous crap from those decades. Full-blown, uncontrollable addiction to running and/or fitness is always a plus. There's nothing better than having a workout partner. Being that I'm 5'11" I'd be lying if I said height doesn't matter. I do prefer guys that are 6' or over, but it's not a dealbreaker. I'm also drawn to stiltwalkers, card sharks, and Civil War veterans.

If you made it this far I must not have scared you off (or maybe we just have some things in common). Don't be shy, feel free to drop me a line. By the way, if you add me to your favorites, go ahead and say hi. You might as well.
 
Oh that's such a good profile! I've written something similar to your first few paragraphs a few years ago but time passes and I need to go back to that "idea" and update it.

This is very helpful. It really shows you and makes you interesting.

I'll definitely take some of your tips (not your words!) :)
 
I think less is more.

Just tell them enough to pique their interest.

Something like: Mid-30's, AA, single female. No children. College grad, love my work, but love to have fun too. On the weekends you can find me at my favorite bookstore, coffee shop or the gym. I'm at church every Sunday. Salsa dancing is just one of my hobbies. I'm a good cook too.

Looking for a nice, Christian gentleman. A romantic with a kind heart. College-educated, mature. 30-40 years old. Only serious inquiries please.

And of course, wow them with a beautiful picture, which for you I'm sure won't be hard to do.

I will add that I've never dated online or written a profile but just thought I'd throw in my two cents:).
 
ITA with whoever said men are not trying to really learn about you.

Just have a cute body pic.

Men are not literary critics when looking for a date.
 
I like this too but since the profiles include the basic statistical stuff, how would you write it. This seems to fit more with a newspaper personal. The online ones have to indicate your age, race, sex, college etc in a questionnaire form.

Other ideas on how to do a shorter one without the basic statistics?

hopeful said:
I think less is more.

Just tell them enough to pique their interest.

Something like: Mid-30's, AA, single female. No children. College grad, love my work, but love to have fun too. On the weekends you can find me at my favorite bookstore, coffee shop or the gym. I'm at church every Sunday. Salsa dancing is just one of my hobbies. I'm a good cook too.

Looking for a nice, Christian gentleman. A romantic with a kind heart. College-educated, mature. 30-40 years old. Only serious inquiries please.

And of course, wow them with a beautiful picture, which for you I'm sure won't be hard to do.

I will add that I've never dated online or written a profile but just thought I'd throw in my two cents:).
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I used to work for an online dating company (www.spark.net). This was the number one question lol. I have not read through this entire thread but here are some basic pointers in case they have not already been mentioned...

1. Be detailed/elaborate. Don't just write "I like to travel." Name specific places you have been or want to go. If you like sports, tell which types.

2. But don't write a novel. NO ONE wants to sit and read your life story lol

3. I speak with men on these sites all the time and they do read your profile. Pictures are def. important but men also want to know that you have some depth and intellect (the serious ones do at least) and if there is no description or if you write something really generic they get turned off.

4. Be positive. A big mistake that a lot of online daters make is listing things that they don't want. That is also a turn off, instead list the things you do want.

5. Ask yourself some simple questions, (i.e. are you a morning person or a night owl? what makes you laugh? etc) write down the answers and incorporate that into your profile.

6. Talk about what your plans for the future are. We all want someone who is on the same page/ going in the same direction.

7. HAVE FUN! Don't make it a chore. If you need to step back for a while, then by all means. You don't want to get burnt out. You can always get back into the "game" anytime!

HTH!

ETA: Also avoid talking politics/political orientaion initially...that can get UGLY!

ETAA: Your hair looks FAB! I hate choo!
 
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hairlove said:
I like this too but since the profiles include the basic statistical stuff, how would you write it. This seems to fit more with a newspaper personal. The online ones have to indicate your age, race, sex, college etc in a questionnaire form.

Other ideas on how to do a shorter one without the basic statistics?
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Hi Hairlove, I think the above post from clarity is really helpful. I wish I could have been more helpful, I just don't have much experience in this area.
 
FluffyRed said:
ITA with whoever said men are not trying to really learn about you.

Just have a cute body pic.

Men are not literary critics when looking for a date.
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Although I do get quite a bit of attention from my photos, I do have men tell me they like that I had to say in my profile. They actually read it. And I have gotten compliments on the way I worded it.

I think it does matter.
 
HoneyDew said:
Although I do get quite a bit of attention from my photos, I do have men tell me they like that I had to say in my profile. They actually read it. And I have gotten compliments on the way I worded it.

I think it does matter.
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I agree the picture will reel them in, but after that it really isnt about looks, but because there are other attractive women on there besides hairlove, they do read profiles ...they HAVE to.
 
hopeful said:
Hi Hairlove, I think the above post from clarity is really helpful. I wish I could have been more helpful, I just don't have much experience in this area.
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You were definitely helpful. I think I need to do a mix between a long and short one. You are just very lucky you don't have much experience in this area! :)
 
This is great. Thank you!

clarity2008 said:
I used to work for an online dating company (www.spark.net). This was the number one question lol. I have not read through this entire thread but here are some basic pointers in case they have not already been mentioned...

1. Be detailed/elaborate. Don't just write "I like to travel." Name specific places you have been or want to go. If you like sports, tell which types.

2. But don't write a novel. NO ONE wants to sit and read your life story lol

3. I speak with men on these sites all the time and they do read your profile. Pictures are def. important but men also want to know that you have some depth and intellect (the serious ones do at least) and if there is no description or if you write something really generic they get turned off.

4. Be positive. A big mistake that a lot of online daters make is listing things that they don't want. That is also a turn off, instead list the things you do want.

5. Ask yourself some simple questions, (i.e. are you a morning person or a night owl? what makes you laugh? etc) write down the answers and incorporate that into your profile.

6. Talk about what your plans for the future are. We all want someone who is on the same page/ going in the same direction.

7. HAVE FUN! Don't make it a chore. If you need to step back for a while, then by all means. You don't want to get burnt out. You can always get back into the "game" anytime!

HTH!

ETA: Also avoid talking politics/political orientaion initially...that can get UGLY!

ETAA: Your hair looks FAB! I hate choo!
Click to expand...
 
Write a few drafts and get people who know you to read them.

Sorry ladies I don't think the picture is all men are interested in. They do read the pictures and posting a cute body pic may give the wrong idea and attract the wrong kind of man.

***I got this from an interracial dating book. My friends have tried it and were successful***

1) HEADLINE ex: SBF seeks SWM

2) Age, height, weight (entirely up to you) or weight range or body type, hair colour, eye colour and related information. You can include your skin tone if you want. Marital status

3) few words about what you do for a living

4)A few dozen words about what you do in your leisure time... if you include books, television, cusine or movies say what kind.
Location

5) A few truthful words about your personality. Make sure you talk about personality characteristics that would be of interest to a romantic companion and not a prospective employer (lol)

6) What are you looking for in a man? (race, age, religion, leisure time/interests, location/acceptable distance from you and personality traits etc...This should help the tumbleweeds viewing your profile to keep on rolling and the lovely men to get in touch.

Example of what mine would look like

SBF, 20, 5 ft 8, curvy, of Caribbean descent, medium brown skin tone, college educated, training to be a teacher, sociable, vivacious, giggly, feminine, non smoker, light drinker. I enjoy jazz, travelling, various cuisine, dancing, foreign, science fiction, classic and romantic films. I have a great sense of humour.

ETA: I just realised my example ad sounds more like a newspaper personal ad and not an online dating profile. The online dating profiles usually have questions that you answer as you complete your profile. You can then elaborate on things that you think will be interesting to possibly romantic companions. Where did you travel to recently? Family orientated? Hobbies? Talents?

All the best
 
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