How do you deal w/him when he's in a funk or moody??

[*5+5]

Yesterday SO was in a TOTAL funk for no reason at all that I was aware of.

He hogged the remote all day.

He didn't want to leave the house after we were invited to two different outings. Then he got mad at me for not giving our friend a clear cut "NO".

He was texting or Im-ing on his phone for like two hours straight<<<----I didn't ask him about it, I just let it be.

We didn't have any affectionate moments that I recall.

I attempted to play w/him and he quickly got annoyed. erplexed

I went in the living room and polished my nails, to give him space for about an hour. Come back he is still in a funk.

By this time I'm annoyed...I just wanted him to go home! I'm a pretty passive person, it's difficult for me to nip things in the bud on spot.

I just laid there, pillow length apart and was really frustrated. I asked him if he was okay and he looked at me like I had just pooted or something and said No. SO isn’t passive at all, if he has a problem with me there is no doubt about it, he’s going to let me know.

I’m not always in the best of moods, after all I’m human, but if I’m in a shady mood I’ll let him know so he won’t feel as tho’ he is part of the problem. I don’t like how he dealt with whatever was bothering him yesterday, but I believe this is one of those days that I’ll just have to chalk up for the sake of not arguing over something that maybe nothing.

Ladies how do you deal with the difficult days without becoming annoyed or frustrated?

I’ve decided to not say anything to him about it and hope he’s in a better mood today.

We are suppose to go and see the T.D. Jake movie tonight and now I’m feeling I would rather go w/friends instead of taking a gamble w/his disposition.

Thoughts, advice….

 

[*~*Afrolicious*~*]

I'd ask him what was wrong and if he didn't tell me (which would be rare b/c he's pretty open) I'd leave him alone. If he got attitudey with me then I' d kick him lol. Its immature, but I did that once and it made me feel better and had he laughed in surprise.

 

[Vanity1]

I'd ask him what was wrong and if he didn't tell me (which would be rare b/c he's pretty open) I'd leave him alone. If he got attitudey with me then I' d kick him lol

Yeah, I ask one time and then I just leave him alone and do my own thing. When he feels better we normally talk. Just find something else to do and ignore him that will eat him up.

 

[Radianthealth]

I'd ask him what was wrong and if he didn't tell me (which would be rare b/c he's pretty open) I'd leave him alone. If he got attitudey with me then I' d kick him lol

Ditto, minus the kicking. Sometimes DH needs time alone...so I go into the other room and workout, read a book, take a bath, play on the internet or watch TV (all with a smile on my face).

I am really big on not letting his bad mood affect me so I send him love and move on my way

This is probably why we hardly ever have arguments

 

[QT]

Let him come to me. He will open up when he is ready, that's when you ask him what's going on. Other than that just humble yourself and allow room to open up.

 

[MD_Lady]

I give DH his space (i.e. I don't talk to him, joke with him, or hang out in the same room with him) when he's in a less than stellar mood.

I do have a question though...

By this time I'm annoyed...I just wanted him to go home! I'm a pretty passive person, it's difficult for me to nip things in the bud on spot.

If he wasn't in the mood to interact with you, why didn't he go home?

 

[DarkHair]

My DH talks to me about things on his own. If I notice that he's in a mood, I ask him and if he doesn't want to talk, I either start praying out loud and/or quoting scriptures. He then smiles out of guilt and comes around. If he doesn't, I still leave him alone.

Prayers and scripture quoting really helps when arguing and not talking.

 

[*5+5]

I give DH his space (i.e. I don't talk to him, joke with him, or hang out in the same room with him) when he's in a less than stellar mood.

I do have a question though...
If he wasn't in the mood to interact with you, why didn't he go home?

I don't know why he didn't just go home, I would've slept better. He even suggested that I go out with my friends although he didn't want to go.

 

[BabyImaStarr]

I ask him what's wrong and if he doesn't seem like he want to talk, I leave him the hell alone! I know that he will talk when he is ready.

 

[gloomgeisha]

Get on Second Life or Guild Wars and don't say a word. Normally I can tell when he's in a "mood" before he even says anything so I'll keep quiet until he asks me "What's wrong?"

Then I'll say something like "Nothing sweetie, I just thought you might like some quiet time."

The normally that gets him to open up and start talking about what's on his mind. I don't press him for any information.

 

[ThatJerseyGirl]

i use to just give mines a pack of Always and some midol and leave him alone.....

sometimes I think men PMS too....

 

[Tylers-mom]

I'll ask him if he's okay...if it's clear that he doesn't want to talk about it I'll leave him alone until he comes around. Sometimes people just want their space....

 

[itismehmmkay]

Depends on my mood. If I'm feeling level-headed, I don't take it personally and just stay quiet myself (maybe read a book or watch TV). If I'm cranky or feeling bratty, I'll mess w/ him and eventually start a fight I very rarely do the latter though; the results are not good. My best bet is to pick up a book.

 

[dlewis]

I just leave him alone.

 

[~~HoneyComb~~]

i use to just give mines a pack of Always and some midol and leave him alone.....

sometimes I think men PMS too....

Funny!!! But I do agree, men PMS too

 

[chelleyrock]

Leave him alone and go about by business as if nothing's wrong. That's what I want when I'm moody.

 

[LoveLiLi]

I ask him what's wrong. If he doesn't want to talk about it I read a book or watch some trashy tv on Oxygen. He usually tells me what's going on soon after I start doing my own thing. If that doesn't work, he has a habit of talking to me when I'm in the shower. That seems to be his therapy time, lol.

Everyone gets in their moods, so I don't read too much into it.

 

[JustKiya]

I ask him what's wrong, once. If he says nothing (as he usually does) I act like he ain't moody, and move on. Either he'll get over it, or he'll talk about it, and me acting different isn't going to cause either to happen any faster. *sigh*

 

[*5+5]

Ditto, minus the kicking. Sometimes DH needs time alone...so I go into the other room and workout, read a book, take a bath, play on the internet or watch TV (all with a smile on my face).

I am really big on not letting his bad mood affect me so I send him love and move on my way

This is probably why we hardly ever have arguments

How'd you master that? That's something I need to work on. My SO vibe is so cold when he is moody and it's hard for me to ignore it.

I think he felt bad the next day. When I came home he was all smiling at me while we were chatting. I was thinking look at this dude tryna high-energy his way out of an explanation

 

[Tylers-mom]

i use to just give mines a pack of Always and some midol and leave him alone.....

sometimes I think men PMS too....

Good one I'm going to try that.....

 

[Radianthealth]

How'd you master that? That's something I need to work on. My SO vibe is so cold when he is moody and it's hard for me to ignore it.

I think he felt bad the next day. When I came home he was all smiling at me while we were chatting. I was thinking look at this dude tryna high-energy his way out of an explanation

I have to talk myself through it...stay centered in my own peace

Realize that his bad attitude has nothing to do with me and just like he decides how he wants to respond to a situation so can I. I choose to respond by being happy no matter what.

I have had to repeat these affirmations for the last few days because DH has been attempting to get on my last nerve. I dunno if he is bored of if it is the pregnancy hormones...either way I have been reminding myself to stay positive and happy no matter what

 

[Highly Favored8]

I leave him alone and give him peace until he is ready to come out. Now, if it takes too long then I ask what is up. 1-2 days will suffice before I am concerned.

 

[Farida]

I would tell him, that it is clear he is in a funk, whether because of me or other issues, and it makes it an unpleasant environment for me to be in. If he needs his space he should ask, and if he doesn't I would leave and tell him to contact me when he is ready to talk or has worked whatever it is out (this second part if it had nothing to do with me). I know because I used to do this to DH all the time. I didn't realize that it is one thing when you are single and do this to friends or nobody because you are alone, but when you are with someone 24/7 it ruins everyone's time.

 

[BillsBackerz67]

I just leave him alone and go on about my business. But if he decides to try to come over in a bad mood I have had no problems politely requesting that he goes back home. Why bother coming over here to act like that?

 

[blkbeauty]

Your SO sounds acutally sounds like me last night. I was in a mood from work and didn't want to be bothered. By night time, I was barely talking to my FH. I guess I have to do some making up tonight!!!

 

[ThatJerseyGirl]

mines got on my nerves this morning. i didn't have anymore always or tampons to give him, so while he was in his bathroom taking a shower, i kindly walked in his bathroom and flushed the toilet a couple of times...u know..to cool him off some.

 

[adf23]

Yeah, I ask one time and then I just leave him alone and do my own thing. When he feels better we normally talk. Just find something else to do and ignore him that will eat him up.

Thank you- when DH is in a funk I go on about my business. If I KNOW it has nothing to do with me, I just leave him alone. I'm all for empathy, but I am not going to let someone elses bad mood upset me, when I know its not about me (DH or anyone).

 

[ThickHair]

It works to just be silent. The day after NYE, SO's sister had a heart attack. Understandably (is that a word) he has been in a foul mood and IT has been for over a week.

She had a mild heart attack and went home about 3 days later, he was still crabby\mfer. We spoke on Saturday and I was about to give up especially since we didn't talk Sunday nor Monday. I got a few measily texts. Today he called, poured his heart out to me, begged for my forgiveness and will be bringing my gift over tomorrow. He thanked me for being so patient and under standing with him....... I am thinking I didn't even say jack to your black arse. He praised me like I was the queen, which I am LOL.

Before ladies I would wear a brotha out asking what was wrong, what can I do and still ended up feeling like crap. I did nothing and he is thankful. WHAT UP WITH THAT?