How did you make your decision to go natural?

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danimani

Member
I'm new here, but I have lurked for a number of months. When I began lurking, I never really considering going natural, but now I am.

I haven't had a relaxer since early April, and I have a quite bit of new growth. To be honest, I really like the texture of my new growth. I'm considering going completely natural and skipping my touch-up in August. But I also don't want to do a big chop.

My family, particuarly my mother--who had more than her share of natural hairstyles in the 70's--thinks I'm crazy. But after lurking here for a couple of months, I've learned that I can have mangeble, healthy, natural hair. Already I think my hair is becoming more healthy and I've only been lurking since early June, so I know it can become even healthier now that I know how to care for it.

How did you make your decision to go natural and what did you do when you had regrets? And how on earth did you handle the naysayers?
 
danimani said:
I'm new here, but I have lurked for a number of months. When I began lurking, I never really considering going natural, but now I am.

I haven't had a relaxer since early April, and I have a quite bit of new growth. To be honest, I really like the texture of my new growth. I'm considering going completely natural and skipping my touch-up in August. But I also don't want to do a big chop.

My family, particuarly my mother--who had more than her share of natural hairstyles in the 70's--thinks I'm crazy. But after lurking here for a couple of months, I've learned that I can have mangeble, healthy, natural hair. Already I think my hair is becoming more healthy and I've only been lurking since early June, so I know it can become even healthier now that I know how to care for it.

How did you make your decision to go natural and what did you do when you had regrets? And how on earth did you handle the naysayers?
Click to expand...

My decision was based on the fact that my hair was thinning. I decided to be natural or be bald. Over the years I had transitioned several times and my hair always seem to flourish when I was natural. That sealed the deal for me. I just came to the conclusion that chemicals and my fine, thin hair did not get along.

Now for the naysayers. To tell you truthfully I didn't have many, two to be exact. It was easy to handle them because while they were speaking I just looked at their bald, damaged, one inch hair(literally) and knew I didn't want my hair to look like theirs.
 
I got tired of looking at my damaged thinning relaxed hair. I think my hair is so much healthier now. I also wanted to start loving myself how God created me. I only had one naysayer which was my friend and I don't pay attention to her.
 
Several things factored into my decision to transition out of relaxers:

1. Got tired of the dependence on relaxers, hairdressers
2. Got tired of spending time and energy and money at the beauty shop
3. Got tired of sweating out my hair in the summer
4. Got tired of the weak hair that didn't grow past a certain point
5. The hairdresser who loved on my hair and me like a sista-girlfriend moved out of state
6. Wanted to have flexibility and not be trapped from certain activities (like swimming) in order to save my hair
7. Wanted to do something different...figure out my own style instead of living society's version of what my hair is supposed to look like

I should add that my mom is a serious old-school hairdresser. I NEVER learned how to do my own hair. Maybe if I had learned some of the wonderful techniques here at LCHF, I might have a different outlook and I might have made different decisions. At this point, I do not plan to go back to relaxers.

10 months ago today I got my last and final relaxer! Wow! After 20-plus years of relaxing, I NEVER thought I could get to this point.... I'm amazed and grateful!
 
I got tired of getting my hair done. I never liked it and wore the curl longer than most because relaxed hair was too much maintenance. I did not realize I had another choice until my younger sister went natural. The thing she always reminded me was combing my hair wet with conditioner, but she never pressured me. After a couple of attempts with very mild texturizers and them breaking my hair off, I just said the hell with it--and I never had an urge since. I have been mostly natural for about a decade, but I never learned to really care for my hair until '04. Now, I am determined to leave the scissors alone and get a 'fro that is scary beyond all reason. ;)
 
Didn't want to be relaxed anymore. I was tired of getting touch-ups and probably never felt like the process really "fit" my personality. My hair was pretty healthy and fairly long. My stylist was my best friend, and we had a good hair relationship.

I think I just decided one day to transition.

I didn't have any naysayers really. People made comments about "what" I would do after the BC or wondered "why" I was cutting all my hair, but no one actively tried to disuade me or chop me up. I don't really have people like that in my life--or else they know enough to keep quiet.
 
I just wanted to try something new. MTG made my relaxed hair grow so fast, I had to keep getting touch ups every 3 to 4 weeks.
 
Bad relaxer experience when moving back home from college...

Wasn't getting a retouch until I found a hairdresser I could trust...

Year went by, no hairdresser, no relaxer....

And then it just was.
 
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Actually, my hair made the decision for me, lol. Either my hair has gotten curlier over the years, resistant to relaxing, or a combination of both. My hair never got remotely straight from relaxers in those last days. I workout all the time, I sweat like a man, so I was always obsessing over what would become of my hair. I could not wrap it while it was part damp fom sweat because it would dry a huge frizzball, if I let it airdry it would get all puffy and curly at the roots, so I found myself wearing ponytails and claw clips in winter and wash n gos and pony puffs in the summer.

With that said, it wasn't until I found this site, nc.com, and np.com that I truely understood the unlimited potential wearing my natural hair could yield.
 
i made the decision to go natural when i found a patch of hair in the crown of my head that was completely broken off. And also, my once thick relaxed hair began to thin out greatly over the years. I know now that i didn't treat my relaxed hair well but I decided to go natural and start fresh. In the beginning when I had regrets, I just remembered how my hair will look if i put a relaxer back in and that kept me to stay on track. And also looking at inspirational hair albums gave my motivation to keep going.I might have been lucky but i don't remember having any naysayers. Actually, everyone around me was very supportive. My mom was natural, so that helped.

good luck on your transition to natural, it might be tough in the beginning but if you stay focused on your hair goals, you can do it!
 
Simple...I just wanted to see what my natural hair looked like... I didn't remember my childhood hair (before relaxers...)
 
Danimani, I felt the exact same way as you when I first joined this board. I never thought about going natural or even having natural hair until I found this board. I thought all black women got relaxers. I also didn't want to chop all my hair off either at first. I wanted to wait after 2 years of transitioning. Ha! I didn't make it. Only lasted 7 months.

Anyway, to answer your questions, this board is basically what allowed me to make my decision to go natural. Seeing all the photo albums of natural haired women were really inspirational. I was also tired of getting relaxer touch-ups. I dreaded having to get my hair touched-up for fear of burns. I was also curious about what my natural hair texture looked like. Plus, I felt like if these women that I saw on this board can wear their hair naturally without chemicals, then I can too!
I really never had regrets. The only thing that I kinda regret was when I relaxed twice during my transition. After I finally was firm about going natural, I just stayed strong and endured.
And about the naysayers, I basically just ignored them and never let them affect me and my decision to go natural. It was a really interesting phase with those naysayers. Friends and family talking about my nappy hair but I didn't feel bad or anything about what they would say because I was determined and aiming toward my goal to be completely natural.

Well, I hope that helps. Happy hair growing and best wishes to you on your hair journey.
 
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I thought about going natural for a few years before I actually did it. I didnt know how to become natural so once I BC's my hair bald (my husband had a FIT!!!) and had to grow it back, I said "Heeeeey! Heres my chance to be natural!" I havent looked back since. I wanted to be natural b/c it seemed like less maintanence and I wouldnt have to sit for 6 and 7 hrs in a solon and get mediocre/ghetto service and then have to turn around and pay for it. My hair was very healthy and long before I BC's. I just got bored with it. I also wanted to see what my natural hair looked like since I cant remember what it was like before my 1st relaxer (I had one at 4 years old. Moms was crazy!)

The naysayers dont even matter to me. They aint the ones who have to deal with my hair- I do, so they can KMA! :D
 
My decision was made by a chemical mishap:

My hair broke off from the root when a relaxer was put in my hair. Everytime I touched it, handfuls of long strands came out. I also had huge chemical burns on my scalp. I was devastated. I had no choice but to cut it all off, as it was balding anyway. That was 3.5 years ago and I am afraid to let ANY CHEMICAL (dyes included) near my hair. Thank GOD the damage wasn't permanant.
 
I wanted more hair independence and found going natural to be more appealing than learning to self-relax. My mom had always done my touchups, and she was going to help me learn to do my own, but I was inspired by the naturals on LHCF to just stop relaxing all together. It turned out to be a great decision for me. I personally haven't had any negative responses to my hair. Everyone seems to like it :yep:
 
I just recently started to transition. My decision was based on my thick hair starting to thin out from being permed. (This is my own diagnosis) What sealed the deal for me to go natural was taking MSM and noticing that my ng was coming in much softer. My last relaxer was in April 2006. I've been on my way to natural ever since.:)
 
In approximate order of realisation:

- There was no way my relaxed hair would grow past shoulder length mainly due to my constant overlapping of relaxers.

- I was getting fed up of not being able to colour my hair with bleach, permanent colour etc.

- Scalp burns can't be good.

- When I found out how you take care of curly hair properly, I thought it being natural would be great.

- I'd have to stop relaxing my hair eventually so I may as well get the transition over and done with ASAP so I can get on with the proper hair growing.

- When I learnt how to flat iron my hair properly it looked straighter than when it was relaxed and didn't take that much longer to style. So why bother relaxing?

(ETA 'approximate')
 
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I'm not sure I'm going to go natural just yet. I know it takes a lot of time, patience, and knowledge to go through with the transition, and I know I'm not completely dedicated to maintaining a natural, healthy head yet.

But this board is chalk full of advice, so I'm definitely armed with more information than ever!
 
well i went natural by accident. i got braids and i knew i couldnt get a relaxer right after i took them out so i decided to just press the roots. then i realized my hair look better pressed than it did relaxed. so i decided to stop perming my hair. and before the braids i had constant breakage for about 3 years. people wouldnt believe me when i told them i had a perm. my hair got to a point where it was really thin and i had to cut if off. then after i cut it i noticed two bald spots. it was too much for me.

honestly, i do have regrets abot being natural. my hair is very unmanagable and takes up too much time. if i had known then wat i know now about hair care i would have stayed relaxed. about the naysayers i had a couple especially with me having "bad hair" but i just shook it off. good luck with watever u decide.
 
I think one of my problems is I'm not even sure what type of hair I have because it's always been relaxed and when I felt new growth, I'd run back to get it relaxed.

Maybe I'll delay my next relaxer until October or December. I haven't had one since early April, and by then I'll be able to tell exactly what type of new growth I'll have.
 
A few months before I found hair boards, I kept going 'what would happen, if I just stop perming?' That was the first spark with me. I had gone through a slew of stylists. I was pissed off with how unprofessional the service was not to mention how expensive it was for me to maintain relaxed hair plus extensions/weave.

I have read about people romanticizing what their natural hair would look like. My approach was the exact opposite. I started transitioning with the impression that my hair was going to look straight brillo padish, but as long as it meant that I wouldn't have to deal with a stylist, I was totally ok with pulling my scouring pad hair into a bun. :)

I was 2-3 months post when I found LHCF and NP.com. I looked at every natural/transitioner fotki album I could find. I also checked out all the albums of women who had been successful at stretching relaxers for 6 months or more. Doing this didn't necessarily make my transition easier, but it did give me some perspective on what to expect as far as breakage,detangling,etc.
 
I just didn't want to relax my hair anymore. I knew my hair would be a lot healthier and grow longer if I would cut out the chemicals. And I couldn't see myself continuing with the relaxers my whole life. It was as good a time as any to stop using them. I was very curious about what my natural hair would look like, though I anticipated that my hair would be COMPLETELY different than it turned out to be. But going natural has been a really good thing for me.
 
My hair did. My relaxed hair wouldn't stop breaking. I was doing everything right. I eventually realized that it was because of the way my hair grew. The strands don't grow at the same thickness, they tend to be a tad thinner at certain sections so when the hair is relaxed these "weak spots" become even weaker and prone to breakage. I wish I could have kept relaxing (simply because I looked good with it), but I have to face the facts and learn to work with and love my natural hair.
 
JCoily said:
A few months before I found hair boards, I kept going 'what would happen, if I just stop perming?' That was the first spark with me. I had gone through a slew of stylists. I was pissed off with how unprofessional the service was not to mention how expensive it was for me to maintain relaxed hair plus extensions/weave.

I have read about people romanticizing what their natural hair would look like. My approach was the exact opposite. I started transitioning with the impression that my hair was going to look straight brillo padish, but as long as it meant that I wouldn't have to deal with a stylist, I was totally ok with pulling my scouring pad hair into a bun. :)

I was 2-3 months post when I found LHCF and NP.com. I looked at every natural/transitioner fotki album I could find. I also checked out all the albums of women who had been successful at stretching relaxers for 6 months or more. Doing this didn't necessarily make my transition easier, but it did give me some perspective on what to expect as far as breakage,detangling,etc.
Click to expand...
I just checked out your album. What a huge inspiration to me. If I decide to continue the transition, I imagine my journey will be very similar to yours!

Thank you all for the input. I admit, the $50 I spend to get my hair relaxed is one reason I'm tired of relaxing--I love my hair dresser, but she's not nearly as efficient as she used to be as her salon grows in customers. And I remember my hair used to be incredibly thick. It's definitely thinned out over the years and I think relaxing has had something to do with it. I'm glad I found this board--it's awesome.
 
no spritual or relaxer/creamy crack hating reasons, I loved wearing braids so I keep the braids in for a while and never relaxed my hair, my mom said relaxer or braids so I chose braids. It worked out good because I was on my way to college anyway. I actually only relaxed recently because I wanted to wear str8 weaves. To change up my style I might go natural again, I love experimenting.
 
I wanted to find out what my hair actually looked like without it beign bone straight.

My hair hated being straight because it reverted when I drank a glass of water.

Saw an incredible amount of nappy heads on the internet and in DC and was envious.

Wanted to do something new and more true to who I am as a black woman.

Tired of imitating something that I'm not.
 
I wanted to try something new.
I was tired of relaxing.
I saw a pic of my big old poofy natural hair and said that's what i want again.
 
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