HELP!!!! Stylist Wants to "Run RELAXER THROUGH TO ENDS!!!"

[MoniintheMiddle]

Hello Ladies!

I need some advice. Last night i decided to try a new stylist that a cowroker recommeded. Now, the only time i step foot in a salon is when it is time to get my relaxer. I ahd my last relaxer about 3 weeks ago. Now since I was a new client i expected the stylist to look at my hair instead of sending me directly to the shampoo girl but hey, I was not suprised. The shampoo girl did a good job.
Anyway, I am in the stylist chair for a rollerwrap. She asked me when was teh last time i had a deep condition. I told her about 2-3 weeks ago when I had my last relaxer. She said my hair was a little dry. Cool. It is the fall and i usually wear my hair pinned up in a french roll and i do use gelerplexed...but, it works. Then she asked me what type of perm do I use. I told her Design essentials the one she had all around her shop. She then asked me if I had worn braidfs previously. I told her no.
She said "hmm, design is a good perm but i don't like how your previous stylist applied it. Your hair isnt as straight as it should be to be 3 weeks old." She then says "to correct this problem, I will need to run the relaxer through to the ends when you get your next retouch." That will take care of the dryness.
Now, I have been doing my own hair for a year and a half (except relaxers). My hair is shoulder length and when I first started caring for my hair it was super short and was broken something awful. Now that I am somewhat educated about hair care and the care of my own hair, I do not feel like perming my hair through to the ends would benefit me at all. In fact, I think it would break my hair off. My hair texture is fine and it diesn't take much maniuplation. Do you guys have any thoughts?
Oh, by the way, the stylist tells me "how have such a nice texture and very nice hair. The only thing we need to do is relax it to the ends!!!!"

 

[RubyWoo]

Just tell her no. You risk over processing your hair by her doing this.

Also, since your hair is dry and you haven't deep conditioned in 2-3 weeks, you need to step you up you DC game to restore the moisture in your hair. Deep condition with a moisturizing deep conditioner at least once a week for the next few weeks.

Lastly, what gel are you using? Some gels have alcohols in them that can be drying to the hair. That could be another factor contributing to the dryness.

 

[thefineprint]

just tell her no thank you?

 

[ravenmerlita]

Run. Don't do it. I say don't go back. But if you do go back, please don't relax through to the ends. My hair is very fine and it is also dry. Before I started taking care of it on my owns, running the relaxer through to the ends was something the stylist did to supposedly take care of my ends that were rough and dry. IT DID NOT WORK. It was horrible for my hair.

 

[remnant]

Just tell her no. You risk over processing your hair by her doing this.

Also, since your hair is dry and you haven't deep conditioned in 2-3 weeks, you need to step you up you DC game to restore the moisture in your hair. Deep condition with a moisturizing deep conditioner at least once a week for the next few weeks.

Lastly, what gel are you using? Some gels have alcohols in them that can be drying to the hair. That could be another factor contributing to the dryness.

I have nothing more to add

 

[DayStar]

tell her NO! If she persists, stop going to her!

 

[Evazhair]

I would tell her no thanks, definitely. I had a stylist try to tell me my no lye ends were underprocessed and wanted to run the lye through my hair on my first visit to her. I told her no. She tried for about a year and a half at each touchup to convince me, along with trying to get me to get color.I Once I told her I wouldn't be changing my mind, she stopped. I used a chemical block before I went to her( she was a good stylist), and in time, through trimming out the no lye ends gradually, my dryness got better,. Tell her no, and if she gets crazy with you just walk away!

ETA I think that is one of their biggest cons to get you to need to come in there weekly.

 

[Evazhair]

Hello Ladies!

I need some advice. Last night i decided to try a new stylist that a cowroker recommeded. Now, the only time i step foot in a salon is when it is time to get my relaxer. I ahd my last relaxer about 3 weeks ago. Now since I was a new client i expected the stylist to look at my hair instead of sending me directly to the shampoo girl but hey, I was not suprised. The shampoo girl did a good job.
Anyway, I am in the stylist chair for a rollerwrap. She asked me when was teh last time i had a deep condition. I told her about 2-3 weeks ago when I had my last relaxer. She said my hair was a little dry. Cool. It is the fall and i usually wear my hair pinned up in a french roll and i do use gelerplexed..The thing to do would have been suggest that you deep condition at least weekly. 6-7 days post wash, my hair tends to be dry. I used to wash every two weeks. Washing/dc every week makes a huge difference my hair. Did she say anything about weekly deep conditioning? That would have been the logical conclusion before suggesting corrective relaxers. There was a night and day difference in my hair when I started faithfully deep conditioning weekly.


She said "hmm, design is a good perm but i don't like how your previous stylist applied it. Your hair isnt as straight as it should be to be 3 weeks old." She then says "to correct this problem, I will need to run the relaxer through to the ends when you get your next retouch." That will take care of the dryness. To be fair, She may have been right about underprocessing, but unless the underprocessed hair was like in an afro state, I think it is ridiculous to jump to corrective relaxer conclusions. It is best to baby, condition and gradually grow out the "underprocessed hair", if it really is. I speak from experience.
I wish you the best

 

[myco]

A relaxer by itself cannot repair dryness, breakage, etc. That's like telling someone to smoke more cigarettes to get rid of a cough.

When stylist say crap like that, I really think they are trying to drum up business. When your hair starts breaking she can continue blaming it on your previous dryness and schedule you for extra deep conditioning and protein treatments.

More frequent deep conditioning will help with the dryness. Using a humidifier during the winter also helps.

Unless you wanted bone straight hair, the fact that it is not very straight after 3 weeks shouldn't be an issue.

 

[Moroni]

Apparently, you were not satisfied with your previous stylist? I don't try new salons/stylists the way I try new restaurants. I'd be concerned that she didn't perform an in-depth consultation with you as a new client....RED FLAG! If you're looking for someone to help you care for your hair, I'd keep looking. There are threads advising how to interview a stylist...I'd follow those. If there's someone other than that co-worker within your circle who has beautiful, healthy relaxed hair raving about their stylist who helped them to grow her hair to great lengths....I'd check that one out. Definitely....KEEP LOOKING!

 

[aloof one]

That woman is stupid.

Just tell her no, thats the simple answer right there.

Perming your hair wont moisturize it, it wont take care of split ends, it wont nourish or cleanse or deep condition it. Only ignorant black folks think getting a relaxer will make their already relaxed ends healthier, and only stylists who want to keep you coming back for help would pull the relaxer through to your ends. Ive said it before and Ill say it again, the b!tch wants you bald.

 

[glamazon386]

It sounds like she wants to do a corrective relaxer. (Which does work to get rid of those fuzzy under processed parts but every body doesn't know what they're doing.) A lot of times when you go to a new stylist, they want to do that so they can start off with your hair all the same texture. It will smooth it all out. I had somebody do it to my hair before (my hair was under processed in some spots from different relaxers, namely Motions , not straightening it all to the same degree of straightness. It looked fuzzy and dry in those spots.) on the first relaxer when I was a teenager and then after that she did it the right way. But my hair was already damaged and it just made it worse. Sure it got all of my hair smooth and straight but a few months later when I stopped going to her it started snapping all over the place. And i had huge patches break off in the back.

Since she is new to you and your hair, I wouldn't let her do it. Go to her a few times for non chemical services and watch her and her techniques. See how she does things first. If you don't like what she does, find you another stylist. If you feel confident, in her technique let her relax your hair. If you really don't want her to do the corrective, tell her no.

 

[Nicole1976]

Definitely dont do it.

 

[Blkprincess]

find another stylist.....run like the wind

 

[InJesusName]

Apparently, you were not satisfied with your previous stylist? I don't try new salons/stylists the way I try new restaurants. I'd be concerned that she didn't perform an in-depth consultation with you as a new client....RED FLAG! If you're looking for someone to help you care for your hair, I'd keep looking. There are threads advising how to interview a stylist...I'd follow those. If there's someone other than that co-worker within your circle who has beautiful, healthy relaxed hair raving about their stylist who helped them to grow her hair to great lengths....I'd check that one out. Definitely....KEEP LOOKING!

I agree with this. I would have a problem with a stylist that doesn't do a consultation first. Did she even bother to ask you what you were looking for prior to providing her input? I personally think that if she were a "healthy" hair stylist, she would have immediately suggested DC'ing to attempt to correct the dryness vs. a corrective. I say RUN FORREST RUN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[texasqt]

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I'm sure it costs much more to relax than to just DC.
'nuff said

 

[mochamadness]

I wouldn't let her do it!!!! This is your first time in her chair, I would stick to a simple wash and set or blow dry and curl just to see how she works.

 

[MoniintheMiddle]

Thanks so much for the great advice ladies. I had no intentions of going back to her and I know that I really need to stay on top of my deep conditioning. It amazed me how in one breath she told me how nice my hair was but in the next that I need the relaxer to run through the ends!

 

[Desert Skye]

the b!tch wants you bald.

 

[Legend]

Defintely don't do it! Not only will running the relaxer through not add moisture, it's totally unnecessary. Each time you retouch, during the rinsing, the relaxer will be distributed throughout the length of your hair anyway.

Also, I am amazed she didn't examine your hair before she had you shampooed. As a new customer, she should have done a hair and scalp analysis before any services to know which shampoos to use and recommended a deep conditioner right there and then if she thought your hair felt dry to her. Then, she should give you the option of having services done.

I'm so glad you're not going to give her your business.

 

[locabouthair]

dont let her do it. if you are happy with how straight your hair is then dont bother with her. my hair goal has been put off for a year because of stylists who insist on overlapping.

 

[NYLegalNewbie]

I agree with all the advice that's already been given.

Tell her NO and if she keeps pushing for it, then tell her that you will not be requiring her services today.

Hair stylists are there to serve YOU and YOUR hair needs.

I just went for a relaxer this weekend, and I wanted it done a certain way. I wanted her to start with the left side, leave my hairline last, and do her best to avoid overlapping. My stylist just shrugged, smiled, and said, "Okay, whatever you want."

Now, don't get me wrong. Sometimes a stylist's judgment is valid. Like maybe your ends are damaged beyond all hope in heaven, or you decide that you want to go blonde and he or she knows it will break all your hair off. Or maybe you want a hairstyle with your own hair that's just not going to be possible.

But things such as not running relaxer through your ends...um, yeah, she needs to listen to what you want.