Help!!!Need some prayer & a little advice

birdie said:
Hello Ladies I'm a mother of two I have been seperated since 2002 from my husband. We did not get married in the church he is Muslim. We were young when we got married. Since then we have become kinda friends for the sake of our children. We just were not able to share a healthy relationahip as a couple. I have been feeling bad about filing for divorce because I have not tried to make it work. But what is even worse is that I do not want to. I do not like who I am with him,he has alot of anger and is hard to communicate with as a husband. But as friends we can limit some things we have to deal with of course so it is easier. I am 25 now we've been seprated for almost 5 years and I'm so different from who I was when we were together. My question is am I wrong in God's eyes for not wanting to stayed married and wanting to be in a more healthy relationship?
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Birdie, this is 'totally' between you and God. By talking it out here is good; for we can hold you up in prayer to hear God with a keen ear and heart. But you have to pray it out; give birth to God's answer.

Consecrate yourself alone to be with God in prayer and fasting. Staying in the word for that time and afterwards.

I am 'sensing' that you are ready to just move on and that's good and it is healthy. You're tired of being stagnant and not getting anywhere in this area of your life and you want to move on. This is how God designed us and it's called 'growth'. None of us are meant to stay the same or we will die, spiritually and eventually in the natural.

God's word says, "Without a Vision (something to look forward to; set goals for), we perish. A leper even said in God's word, "Why sit we here til we die, let's move on." And as they moved on, they found life.

I only shared this to give you comfort and the backing of God's word for your feelings to put 'closure' to this area of your life. You have committed no sin, whatsoever in wanting to make the change. For you are truly long overdue to move on to the next level in life that God has for you. You truly have a Destiny and Purpose beyond this.

So, this brings us back to prayer. "Lord, show me my Destiny; show me th path wherein I should walk; give me the words wherewith I should talk. From you I receive, the mind of Christ and the heart of wisdom...you Father God, the wisdom of you. For in you, there is no room for doubt."

See how God moves you and note every jot and tittle of each word, sentence or phrase that God gives you. Even in songs; for God is not limited in His methods of speaking to us.

I will share this from God's word: I Corinthians 7:12-16)

To the rest I say this (I, not the Lord): If any brother has a wife who is not a believer and she is willing to live with him, he must not divorce her.

And if a woman has a husband who is not a believer and he is willing to live with her, she must not divorce him.

For the unbelieving husband has been sanctified through his wife, and the unbelieving wife has been sanctified through her believing husband. Otherwise your children would be unclean, but as it is, they are holy.

But if the unbeliever leaves, let him do so. A believing man or woman is not bound in such circumstances; God has called us to live in peace.

How do you know, wife, whether you will save your husband? Or, how do you know, husband, whether you will save your wife?

Between you and God alone, you will have the answer that gives you peace. God has a way of making things easier for us than we thought possible. But then, that's all because of who He is...our God. ;)

My love to you, angel. :kiss: Be at total peace ;) for God never fails to lead us in the paths of righteousness for His namesake. His namesake, not ours. He bears the burden, so that we don't have to.
 
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[we can limit some things we have to deal with of course so it is easier. I am 25 now we've been seprated for almost 5 years and I'm so different from who I was when we were together. My question is am I wrong in God's eyes for not wanting to stayed married and wanting to be in a more healthy relationship?[/quote]


This is tough to answer because unless God speaks to me and tell me what he wants you to do it's difficult to speak for God because his ways are not our ways and his thoughts are not our thougths so I agree with the scripture's Shimmie provided and her comments to seek God.

Now this is what I do know if you ask God should I leave or should I stay his anwer will be either YES, NO, or Wait.

Earnestly seek his face and he will make it clear to you.

Be blessed.



 
Excuse me Birdie for using your post to ask my question, but I really want to know, what exactly does the Bible say about divorce?
Are there any scriptures besides 1 Corithians 7?
 
Shimmie said:
Birdie, this is 'totally' between you and God. By talking it out here is good; for we can hold you up in prayer to hear God with a keen ear and heart. But you have to pray it out; give birth to God's answer.
Consecrate yourself alone to be with God in prayer and fasting. Staying in the word for that time and afterwards.

I am 'sensing' that you are ready to just move on and that's good and it is healthy. You're tired of being stagnant and not getting anywhere in this area of your life and you want to move on. This is how God designed us and it's called 'growth'. None of us are meant to stay the same or we will die, spiritually and eventually in the natural.

God's word says, "Without a Vision (something to look forward to; set goals for), we perish. A leper even said in God's word, "Why sit we here til we die, let's move on." And as they moved on, they found life.

I only shared this to give you comfort and the backing of God's word for your feelings to put 'closure' to this area of your life. You have committed no sin, whatsoever in wanting to make the change. For you are truly long overdue to move on to the next level in life that God has for you. You truly have a Destiny and Purpose beyond this.

So, this brings us back to prayer. "Lord, show me my Destiny; show me th path wherein I should walk; give me the words wherewith I should talk. From you I receive, the mind of Christ and the heart of wisdom...you Father God, the wisdom of you. For in you, there is no room for doubt."

See how God moves you and note every jot and tittle of each word, sentence or phrase that God gives you. Even in songs; for God is not limited in His methods of speaking to us.

I will share this from God's word: I Corinthians 7:12-16)

To the rest I say this (I, not the Lord): If any brother has a wife who is not a believer and she is willing to live with him, he must not divorce her.

And if a woman has a husband who is not a believer and he is willing to live with her, she must not divorce him.

For the unbelieving husband has been sanctified through his wife, and the unbelieving wife has been sanctified through her believing husband. Otherwise your children would be unclean, but as it is, they are holy.

But if the unbeliever leaves, let him do so. A believing man or woman is not bound in such circumstances; God has called us to live in peace.

How do you know, wife, whether you will save your husband? Or, how do you know, husband, whether you will save your wife?

Between you and God alone, you will have the answer that gives you peace. God has a way of making things easier for us than we thought possible. But then, that's all because of who He is...our God. ;)

My love to you, angel. :kiss: Be at total peace ;) for God never fails to lead us in the paths of righteousness for His namesake. His namesake, not ours. He bears the burden, so that we don't have to.
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AMEN to this go to God for questions because He got answers some may be able to give sound advice but every body's circumstance is different.
 
MindTwister said:
Excuse me Birdie for using your post to ask my question, but I really want to know, what exactly does the Bible say about divorce? Are there any scriptures besides 1 Corithians 7?
Click to expand...

There are many several scriptures about divorce and they basically all say one thing, "God hates divorce. " But there are exceptions, such as for reasons of adultery (which must be proven, not falsely accused or 'suspected' - no 'green-eyed' monster episodes); and physical and mental abuse. This is called 'constructive' dessertion, for the 'abusive' spouse has made it impossible and life threatening for marriage to be possible.

There are also (legal) provisions made for sexual denial by that of a spouse for it forsakes the Covenant of marriage; also wherein it gives cause the sexually forsaken spouse to be tempted to sin. (I have to find this, for it was taught in our Marriage prepartion classes).

1st Corinthians teaches this but it's also somewhere in the old testiment. We may have to make this a 'spin-off' subject, on 'Marriage and Divorce.' It's very good timing and an excellent question that you brought up. ;) Other members can share a lot about this.

Here are some scripture references for you...

Matthew 19:3-12


One day the Pharisees were badgering him: "Is it legal for a man to divorce his wife for any reason?"

He answered, "Haven't you read in your Bible that the Creator originally made man and woman for each other, male and female? And because of this, a man leaves father and mother and is firmly bonded to his wife, becoming one flesh—no longer two bodies but one. Because God created this organic union of the two sexes, no one should desecrate his art by cutting them apart."

They shot back in rebuttal, "If that's so, why did Moses give instructions for divorce papers and divorce procedures?"

Jesus said, "Moses provided for divorce as a concession to your hard heartedness, but it is not part of God's original plan. I'm holding you to the original plan, and holding you liable for adultery if you divorce your faithful wife and then marry someone else. I make an exception in cases where the spouse has committed adultery."

Jesus' disciples objected, "If those are the terms of marriage, we're stuck. Why get married?"
But Jesus said, "Not everyone is mature enough to live a married life. It requires a certain aptitude and grace. Marriage isn't for everyone. Some, from birth seemingly, never give marriage a thought. Others never get asked—or accepted. And some decide not to get married for kingdom reasons. But if you're capable of growing into the largeness of marriage, do it."

This is also noted in Matthew 10:2-12

Here's a teaching from the CBN ministry. There are many other teachings, but it all boils down to one thing, God is against it unless there are exceptional circumstances.

http://www.cbn.com/spirituallife/teachingsheets/divorce_and_remarriage.aspx?option=print

Hope this helps...;)
 
Thanks Shimmie, will take a look at the link :) I also did a search for the word "divorce" on the site biblegetaway.com and found some other scriptures. In moments like these I realize I really NEED to attend some Bible study classes...
 
You really need to ask God for guidance on this issue. Maybe you should seek advice from other married or previously married christian women also. You will be in my prayers.
 
Birdie, I don't have any advice to offer regarding marriage but I will keep you in my prayers! I want the best for you and your children (whatever that may be) and I hope you will find the answers you are seeking with God's guidance. :)
 
MindTwister said:
Thanks Shimmie, will take a look at the link :) I also did a search for the word "divorce" on the site biblegetaway.com and found some other scriptures. In moments like these I realize I really NEED to attend some Bible study classes...
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"MindTwister", you are in such a beautiful place...'hungry' for learning more about the God you love and serve. Did you know that this is more than about Bible Study? Oh yes it is.

For you're actually being 'courted' and 'wooed' by Someone who's smitten by you. Wooed by Someone who delights in your company; Someone who loves having you around...Your Father in Heaven. ;) Oh yes.

He looked down and said,

"Wow, look at my beautiful child ;), I want to spend more time with her. I want to give her the gift of knowing more of Me and just how much I love her. I have so much more in store for her and this is her special time to spend with only Me."

Jesus smiled at the Father and nodded, "Dad, I totally agree." Holy Spirit arose and said, " I will bring her unto thee." The Father said, "Tell her, I'm here waiting and I'll do so patientlly, for this child of mine, my daughter, lives deep within the heart of me. I love her, let's draw her, protect her life and her dreams, for it's my life that dwells within her, for all to see."

"My daughter...my child is asking to know me. This makes my heart proud. My daughter wants to learn more of me." ;)

Amen.
_____________________

God bless you MindTwister...

 
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Shimmie said:
"MindTwister", you are in such a beautiful place...'hungry' for learning more about the God you love and serve. Did you know that this is more than about Bible Study? Oh yes it is.

For you're actually being 'courted' and 'wooed' by Someone who's smitten by you. Wooed by Someone who delights in your company; Someone who loves having you around...Your Father in Heaven. ;) Oh yes.

He looked down and said,

"Wow, look at my beautiful child ;), I want to spend more time with her. I want to give her the gift of knowing more of Me and just how much I love her. I have so much more in store for her and this is her special time to spend with only Me."

Jesus smiled at the Father and nodded, "Dad, I totally agree." Holy Spirit arose and said, " I will bring her unto thee." The Father said, "Tell her, I'm here waiting and I'll do so patientlly, for this child of mine, my daughter, lives deep within the heart of me. I love her, let's draw her, protect her life and her dreams, for it's my life that dwells within her, for all to see."

"My daughter...my child is asking to know me. This makes my heart proud. My daughter wants to learn more of me." ;)

Amen.
_____________________

God bless you MindTwister...

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Why are you about to make me shed some tears :lol:
Thanks a lot Shimmie for those words, thanks for your availability and your help. I am at a place where I'm looking for a place of fellowship, the right Church because it's nice to read your word at home (which I'm not yet consistant with), but doing it in group, being guided through it, is something I really want.
The Word of God is a Word of Peace and it's amazing how peaceful I sometimes feel. I was telling someone saturday that sometimes I'm walking and have this smile on my face and I'm sure folks wonder what in Heaven's name is wrong with me :)
I just want the Lord to make me whole, to guide, to be fully in control.. I desire so much..
 
MindTwister said:
Why are you about to make me shed some tears :lol:

Thanks a lot Shimmie for those words, thanks for your availability and your help. I am at a place where I'm looking for a place of fellowship, the right Church because it's nice to read your word at home (which I'm not yet consistant with), but doing it in group, being guided through it, is something I really want.

The Word of God is a Word of Peace and it's amazing how peaceful I sometimes feel. I was telling someone saturday that sometimes I'm walking and have this smile on my face and I'm sure folks wonder what in Heaven's name is wrong with me :)

I just want the Lord to make me whole, to guide, to be fully in control.. I desire so much..
Click to expand...

And now you are making me cry. For God has used you to confirm that I was hearing from His heart when I posted the reply.

I'm in the same place as you are. I want to know God more. I get tired of messing up and want to make things right. And His word is where I find peace, just like you said. And also like you said, I have 'this smile' on my face, for there is so much peace inside of my heart because of Him.

Yes, you have Someone courting and wooing you. God has heard your heart and He says, "Wow" ... my daughter loves me. She feels me and she loves me. Keep her safe and bring her to me."

I will be in prayer for your place of fellowship. Afterall, it's God's personal call...just for you... :kiss:
 
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