HELP ME..GETTING A BIT SCARED-Men are interested.

[BrooklynSouth]

Placed an ad on AMERICAN SINGLES a few months ago after seeing a beautiful couple who met that way on PLATINUM WEDDINGS. Suddenly I have men 'clicking' with me and wanting a relationship-5 years since a serious relationship. Can you believe I am suddenly frightened after trying internet dating {some successful-but no marriage} for years? I need help y'all. The men are matching well according to my specifications and both-yes, two of them seem to be good matches for me. Why frightened? Well, my cousin was married this past weekend and it stirred something in me so I began to take it seriously about finding a mate...seems her magically beautiful wedding set me on a path but now I'm so scared I'll mess it up again or maybe I'm afraid it will work! I'm telling you this time I'm sticking to the RULES...chapter by chapter because I've done RULES before then thought I knew better then did it my own way-FAIL. I do not even know what I'm expecting from you all...but LHCF sisters........give me what you goterplexed.

 

[BrooklynSouth]

I hate to bump but.............

 

[runwaydream]

Aww it's ok..

i mean im not very good with relationships, i'm not expert or anything but its ok to be scared. esp if you're looking for srs relationships. I mean this can be it. thats what you're thinking right?

Stick to your rules, your game plan, and follow your heart and i'm sure you'll be just fine

 

[Lovelylife]

Both ways you could be seeing more drawbacks than benefits. Either you could really end up loving/liking the guy and get regretted. Or you don't get regretted but after a year or two find out overtime that the guys is a jerk. Perhaps your fear could even be of committing in marriage to the wrong person. I think you should just take it slowly.
It could also be just social anxiety.

 

[korean]

You just have to take the leap of faith.
Just make sure you dont go into every date already
planning the wedding lol. Take it one day at a time.

 

[BrooklynSouth]

You just have to take the leap of faith.
Just make sure you dont go into every date already
planning the wedding lol. Take it one day at a time.

I do my best not to do that but at my age.........somewhere in the back of my somewhat now prudish {after earlier wild years} trained female mind..I do it.

 

[Nayeli]

No expert here either. Try not to let your fear hamper the fun in dating and getting to know new men. As another poster said, it's ok to be nervous. You've already proven to be proactive - now you get to enjoy the ride.

 

[angenoir]

Sound advice has been offered and I have nothing left to add save to say....: Having men interested is a GOOD problem to have!!

Good luck and enjoy the attention!!

 

[gabulldawg]

OP, I am so >>>HERE<<<< with you!!!! This dating crap is STRESSFUL!! It almost is making me want to quit! I met a really great guy and I am so scared about screwing things up that I am so nervous and don't know what to do! I haven't dated in 4 years and have only been with one guy, so I have no idea how "modern" relationships are supposed to work! I feel so out of the loop. Like you said there are so many rules!! Do this, don't to that, say this, don't say that!

Like you, I am ready for marriage, so I think me always thinking about that makes things harder. I'm trying to just relax more and enjoy our time together, regardless of what may happen. At first, I was hoping he was "the one," but I had to come to terms with the fact that he may not be! And that's okay. Maybe he has another purpose in my life. Thinking this way has allowed me to calm down a little bit. I'm still hella nervous, though, and still don't want to screw things up!

This is the first guy I've dated since I broke up with my ex and I already am over this dating thing!! Sometimes I seriously wish our culture subscribed to arranged marriages.

Good luck to you, OP! Relax!!! Easier said than done, I know...

 

[BrooklynSouth]

OP, I am so >>>HERE<<<< with you!!!! This dating crap is STRESSFUL!! It almost is making me want to quit! I met a really great guy and I am so scared about screwing things up that I am so nervous and don't know what to do! I haven't dated in 4 years and have only been with one guy, so I have no idea how "modern" relationships are supposed to work! I feel so out of the loop. Like you said there are so many rules!! Do this, don't to that, say this, don't say that!

Like you, I am ready for marriage, so I think me always thinking about that makes things harder. I'm trying to just relax more and enjoy our time together, regardless of what may happen. At first, I was hoping he was "the one," but I had to come to terms with the fact that he may not be! And that's okay. Maybe he has another purpose in my life. Thinking this way has allowed me to calm down a little bit. I'm still hella nervous, though, and still don't want to screw things up!

This is the first guy I've dated since I broke up with my ex and I already am over this dating thing!! Sometimes I seriously wish our culture subscribed to arranged marriages.

Good luck to you, OP! Relax!!! Easier said than done, I know...

You read my mind-I really hate the dating game but it's the only way to go! I've felt that way about ARRANGED for years..seems to work for many cultures.

 

[onyxdreams]

Op rules or no rules,what is yours is yours and no one can mess it up not even you.That hasn't changed. Rules, five languages, seminars and books can't get him to love you. It won't keep him either all you can do is be yourself.allow love to find you and cherish you.

 

[cheetarah1980]

I'm confused. Have you progressed to seeing and dating these men offline yet? Is everything still on the internet thus far?