I have the EXACT same problem CH. I've been suffering in silence. This ONLY seems to happen after the initial routine. I lose a GOOD handfull of hair and I'm like DANG I know I have some baldspots after this combout.
I've used everything! EVERYTHING to try to soften it. The only thing that has done even a little bit is when I use not only the oil plus conditioner from Motions I use the Nacidit Avocado conditioner first. I rinse that out, and then I use the Motions, sit under a dryer and then rinse out.
That is the ONLY combo that keeps the handfull of hair down to almost a handfull.
But after that dreaded wash I have barely any breakage when I wash my hair afterwards.
It's just that FIRST DANG treatment. I hate it. The other protein treatments are weak for me. I don't know why. But like I said after that initial ritual, I don't have those "Crying game" results.