Getting very FRUSTRATED :(....advice???

[Leslie_C]

I know that my hair is growing, can tell a difference every few weeks. Its getting well past my shoulders. My problem is I feel like Im doing all the right things but still having hair problems. I feel like u should get out what u put in, and Im putting in 100% but only getting ?% in return.

For example, I rarely if ever use heat to style, I airdry my hair, I wash frequently, emphasize on conditioning and moisture, wear protective and semiprotective styles....yet STILL my hair fights me.

Ive had some breakage issues for the past couple of months...anywhere from mild to moderate. I can now tell around my edges and nape area the most and at times I pull little stray hairs out from just handling it. Other times just from combing,etc, there are long and short hairs all around my bathroom sink. I dont understand why its breaking. Ive tried increasing protein, Ive tried decreasing protein. I dont know what my hair wants from me but Id appreciate some advice because Im at whits end!!!!!!!

Sometimes for a day or two I feel like its really doing good, then bam, its dry and brittle again.

If it continues to break, Im only going to have to cut it off so the growth will do me no good. what should I do?

 

[Mochalolita]

Hey Leslie...first...breathe! It'll be fine. What exactly is your hair regimen? When you wear the protective styles, do you brush your hair back from the edges and up from the nape or pull it tightly? Doing that continuously may contribute to breakage. Also, with the frequent washing, be careful of what type of shampoo and conditioner you use. Some of them do contain protein that over time can build up and make your hair brittle, moreso if done frequently...I know for me, it took a loooooong time to find the right combination for my hair, and now I have a good balance. Oddly enough, the less I did to my hair, the better it did in terms of health. I hope that helps a bit...let me know!

Hugs,
Crys

 

[jainygirl]

Just leave it alone. seriously. i dont use alot of things i read about on the board because although they sound great...my hair hasnt really done anything to make me really want to try to change it (as far as using protein to make the hair itself stronger or anything like that) Scale down to the basics and see how your hair likes it then try adding one product at a time and see how your hair likes it...if it doesnt, stop using that product and try something else.

Sometimes using so many products at once makes it hard to isolate what products are benefiting us and which ones are causing harm. Also dont worry so much about hair being around... my husband says i'm like living with a cat because i leave hair everywhere. i figure that's just me. pay attention to when you comb and what you see in the comb not the shedding that may occur naturally every day.

I know that it's hard not to panic about your hair but seriously just stop, regroup and then go from there. I know for me personally using zero heat just doesnt fly. i use minimal heat (once a week i blowdry with a comb attachment and i dont use a flatiron or anything like that--i curl with a curling iron once about every 3-4 months) and this works great for me. i can airdry on occasion but all the time just wouldnt be my thing, and my hair thanks me for it.

My main attention i pay to my hair is my ends. Applying vaseline (like leejure suggests) and putting my hair in a bun or using another product like Profectiv for my ends or Elasta QP oil moisturizer and putting it into a bun and just leaving it alone. for real i know it doesnt sound like much but this is what i do. i know others will have more things to tell ya. anyway HTH -- jainygirl

 

[sweetpineapple]

I've felt that way at times too Leslie. I would have to go with what Jainygirl is saying too. Just be patient and dont sweat it too much. Believe me you get results and not even realize it.

 

[NGC]

I notice your in Florida. Do you know if where you live has hard water? If you do, that can have significant effects on your hair/

What the other two ladies said is on point as well.

 

[Leslie_C]

thx ladies, I appreciate u making me feel better.

Jainy, the hair everywhere is one reason I worry, it makes me think my hair is slowly falling out. My fiance makes fun of me bc sometimes it gets in the food,etc...lol. He says I need a hair net when I cook...lol.

My regimen is pretty much like this:
I wash 1 time a week, sometimes 2 if it feels dirty. 1 time or more Ill do a co wash.

I use nexxus Therappe Shampoo or Design Essentials moisture retention. I use humectress conditioner and I use suave milk n honey for co washes. Sometimes I pretreat or deep condition with EVOO and conditioner, cocounut milk, and honey)...my hair seems to really like that treatment.

For a leave in I use Pantene detangle(just added bc it helps tremendously) then some NTM or Salerm and sometimes a little serum. I moisturize with Elasta QP recovery and also use Africas best herbal oil.

I try not to comb my hair much. My daily styles are braidouts or buns. If wearing a bun I may smooth the outside layer with a comb.

I really dont see where Im going wrong here

My hair feels really nice and soft when it dries but then by two days later its dry, rough and brittle again. Im not sure whether to keep up the co washes bc they soften my hair up or eliminate them bc my hair seems to break from too much handling.

Maybe I should go to the salon and ask them what they suggest, as far as what my hair needs. more Protein, moisture, or both...*sigh*

 

[Leslie_C]

NGC,
I know we do have hard water here, do u know any ways to counteract that?

 

[sweetpineapple]

KereCare makes DeMineralizing Treatment towelets that that help banish tap water build-up.

 

[NGC]

Yep - go to Home Depot or somewhere similar and ask about filters for your shower. Until then you might think about using distilled water to wash and condition your hair. If that's too much, at least do a final rinse with distilled water. I buy my distilled water at WalGreen's (to drink).

That might truly be the missing ingredient in your regime. OH - another thing b4 you buy anything like a filter, I think there are also test kits available at HD too

I truly hope that cause I feel your pain honey, don't give up

 

[inthepink]

Maybe using the serums (with the silicones) are drying out your hair. Instead of using those, stick to oils only. That's my first suggestion especially if you're suffering from dry hair a few days later. This is what too many silicones do to my hair.

 

[Mochalolita]

Be careful of the Nexxus...my mother used the humectress as well, and it does have protein in it. She exercises often and washes her hair frequently, so it was drying her hair out pretty badly...just a thought!

Hugs,
Crys

 

[kareemtiheed]

try a clarifier once a month.. your growth is great

 

[nurseN98]

You know for the past month I've been experiencing a lot more breakage too. My hair is shedding like crazy. The only thing that I know for a fact that has changed is that I haven't doing my weekly clarifying/deep conditioning routine. I've been so busy with school/work/vacation

that I haven't been doing my hair right. You may need a good clarifying/deep conditioner session. When I use to sit under the dryer with conditioner in my hair for at least 30 min,once a week, my hair was not shedding this much!

Hairlove,
thank you for the silicone statement. I went and looked at my products and realized that I use a leave-in with silicone and most of the conditioners I use have some type of silicone in it and Lord knows I haven't clarified in a bit.

 

[diamonddollfla]

I just got the shower filter from Home Depot. 19.99 paragon was the brand name. I know my skin felt better not like it had a film over it and my hair felt like their was a subtle difference like less tangled.

 

[Leslie_C]

thx ladies, Im glad others can relate or give advice! I will definitely try eliminating the cones for a while. Also, Ill take it down to the basics and wash(poo) and use humectress no more than once a week, if I co wash another time Ill use a different conditioner. Only ONE moisturizer,and oil. See if my hair improves...I have been experimenting a lot lately....

thx diomonddollfla! I will definitely get one of those filters! does the water come out slow though bc I HATE low waterpressure.

Ive made so much progress Id hate to have to cut. Im REALLY going to start touching my hair as little as possible, if its in a bun for the day, no taking it down and putting it back up 55 times...lol

where are u at in FL? Im in O Town!

 

[UmSumayyah]

You can also just put distilled water in a spray bottle and mist your hair (instead of taking it down and washing it again) if it feels dry.

 

[Leslie_C]

thx umsumayyah, Ill definitely try that! maybe Ill do that when I workout instead of washing so much. less manipulation can mean less hair loss, ya know?

 

[keylargo]

try mixing castor oil, jojoba oil and distilled water. Layoff the serums-they make my hair dry- and maybe it's time to switch conditioners. Also, I live in Tampa FL and I do an ACV rinse once a week to get rid of build up. My hair feels nice and soft.

 

[alona]

Hey Leslie!
I think the ladies gave great advice you can really benefit from.
For me it was the products, they were not right for my hair. (good products though) The more I researched the ingredients (like the first 4 which are the most found in the product) the more I discovered what didn't work for my hair. Like too much protein, regular shampoo instead of moisturing, etc.(and ofcourse great info the fabulous women of this site)

So you may want to check your product ingredients. Hope it all works for you

 

[RabiaElaine]

I agree with HairLove.

Try oils for moisture. I never understood why my hair never retained moisture until I tried natural things like oils, WGO, and also Carol's Daughter products (which are natural). Natural moisturizers help my hair more than anything else. I also do CO washes every 2-3 days and wash every 2 weeks now. Hard water though is your main problem if you actually have it.

I used to use Humectress but found that after awhile it stopped working for me. I've been using KeraCare Humecto for about a year now and love it! You should give it a try.

HTH.

 

[carameldiva]

I also see a need for deep conditioning here. I don't see anywhere in your regimine where you put on the plastic cap and sit under the dryer or heating cap for 30 mins. You should try this weekly until the condition improves. Then go to biweekly.

 

[Leslie_C]

carmel, I didnt list that but I do use the humectress for deep conditioning once a week. maybe I should do it twice? My hair feels really nice and soft after washing and conditioning/deep conditioning and air drying and its even shiny. but 2 or 3 days later its a mess again....dry and brittle.hmm....

alona, I will definitely look into the ingredients on my products, thats a start!

 

[diamonddollfla]

oops just saw this. I am in Clearwater Leslie

 

[alona]

Hey Leslie
Sorry to hear about your hair woes...I'm witcha.

Try this. No shampoo just cond washes. Use a deep conditioner for damaged/dry hair with evoo, coconut milk and honey under a hooded dryer. Let this be your only regime for about a month. Leave all other products alone. Just to see what happens. Your hair might be tired of the different products. If this helps, you may want to just use conditioner washes and shampoo 1x a month.

hth