FRAN & JESUS on the job - Hurt Feelings

[Laela]

Fran & Jesus on the Job - Hurt Feelings
As written and presented by Mary Whelchel
August 8, 2011

It's Sunday morning and Fran gets the kids ready for church. "Come on, Alice, don't make us late," she encourages her six-year-old daughter. Drew, her son, says, "Mom, she is a slow poke, you know that," as he waits rather impatiently for his sister to get in the car.​

Fran gets the kids settled in their classes and heads for her Sisters in Christ class. As she enters the classroom, her good friend Deborah is there. "Hi, Deborah," Fran says, as she sits next to her.​

Deborah replies with a rather icy hello, and Fran wonders what's wrong. But it's time for class to begin, so she doesn't have an opportunity to talk to her again until after class, when she turns to Deborah and says, "Well, how was your week?" ​

"Okay," Deborah replies abruptly. "'Excuse me, but I gotta run."​

And with that she walks away from Fran. "Lord," Fran says, "something is really wrong with Deborah. What is it?" ​

All through church her mind keeps wandering to Deborah. "I know something is wrong," she thinks. "I wonder what it is." After church she tries to find Deborah, but can't locate her.​

That afternoon she called Deborah, and reached her answering machine. "Deborah, this is Fran," she records, "and I just couldn't get you off my mind. I got the feeling that something was wrong. Hope I'm mistaken, but please call as soon as you can."​

Later that evening the phone rings. "Oh, hi Deborah," Fran says with a delight in her voice. "I'm so glad to hear from you. Are you okay?"​

"Yeah, sure," Deborah replies, again with icicles in her voice.​

"I don't think I had a chance to talk with you all week. How are things at work?" Fran asks.​

"'Bout the same," Deborah says. "They're talking more about downsizing."​

"Are you concerned about your position?" Fran asks.​

"Would you really care?" Deborah asks sarcastically.​

"Well, of course I would Deborah. Why would you say that?" Fran is stunned.​

"Because you don't seem to care about anyone but yourself, Fran," Deborah says.​

Wow, obviously something has happened to upset Deborah, but Fran has no clue. ​

 

[Laela]

Fran & Jesus on the Job - Hurt Feelings
As written and presented by Mary Whelchel
August 9, 2011

Did you ever sense that a friend was upset with you, but you had no idea why?

Fran tries to find out what Deborah is upset about. "Deborah, what have I done? I don't understand."

"Well, sometimes when you have time, we can get together and talk about it-if you ever have time, that is," Deborah replies.

"I have time right now, Deborah," Fran assures her.

"No, it's not something I want to talk about on the phone," Deborah replies.

Well, why don't you come over? I'll make a sandwich and we can talk," Fran invites Deborah.

"I can't just up and come over there, Fran; why don't you come over here?" Deborah replies with some anger in her voice.

"I just wouldn't want to bring the kids over..." Fran starts.

"Just because I don't have kids doesn't mean I can jump every time you holler, Fran," Deborah replies, with increased volume in her voice.

"I didn't mean that, Deborah. It's just hard to talk with the kids around, and here they have their own rooms and stuff..." Fran tries to explain.

"Well, when you have time for me, let me know, Fran," Deborah retorts. "But I'm not able to drop everything and come over there now. But thanks for calling."

And with that abrupt ending, Deborah hangs up. Fran is absolutely shaken to the core. "Lord," she says, "what in the world have I done? Deborah is so angry with me but I don't know why."

The tears are coming down Fran's cheeks, and about that time Alice comes in, "Mommie, can you help me with this puzzle?"

"Not now, Alice," Fran replies, trying to hide her tears.

"What's the matter, Mommie? Are you crying?" Alice asks.

"No, uh, no," Fran stammers, "I'm all right. You work on your puzzle and I'll be in there to help you. Just give me a minute."

Fran manages to hold back the tears for a couple of hours and get the kids in bed. When the house is quiet, she can't stop them any longer, and she buries her head in her hands and sobs. "Why was Deborah so angry with me? I haven't done anything to her? And she said such awful things to me!"

"Fran, a pity party won't solve the problem. Don't take on false guilt, but let's just sit together awhile and talk about this," Jesus urges Fran to listen to him.

 

[Laela]

Fran & Jesus on the Job - Hurt Feelings
As written and presented by Mary Whelchel
August 10, 2011



None of us go through life without hurt feelings, do we? Even our best friends can hurt our feelings and vice versa.

After a very painful phone call this Sunday evening, where Deborah said some hurtful things to Fran, Jesus has urged Fran to avoid the temptation to have a pity party and try to unravel the cause of Deborah's anger.

"Well, Deborah said something about she couldn't come over here and just because I had kids and she didn't, doesn't mean she doesn't have things to do," Fran remembers. "So, it must have something to do with the kids."

"When was the last time you talked to her?" Jesus prompts that question in her mind.

Fran tries to remember. "I guess it was at Sunday school last week. Yeah, that's right. She asked me to have lunch with her, but I couldn't because I had promised the kids we'd go to the park."

"And before that?" Jesus asks.

"Let's see-before that, I remember she called one night when Drew had a big homework assignment and I couldn't talk very long, but I'm sure she understood..." Fran's mouth falls open. "She didn't understand, did she Lord? She thinks I'm just using the kids as an excuse and I really don't care about her..." It starts to clear up in Fran's mind.

"Could be," Jesus replies.

"But what am I supposed to do? She just has no idea of how hard it is to be a working mom. The kids have to be my top priority, and I can't help it if she doesn't understand," Fran starts to get defensive.

"Don't get defensive, Fran," Jesus quietly admonishes her. "Just think it through. Deborah doesn't have a strong supportive family like you, and she hasn't had the Bible teaching you've had. So, she's not as mature in some ways, but you who are strong ought to bear with the failings of the weak and not to please yourselves." Fran recognizes the passage from Romans 15:1 which Jesus brings to her mind.

"But, Lord, she owes me an apology for the way she talked to me," Fran says.

"You who are strong ought to bear with the failings of the weak..." Jesus repeats.

"Okay," Fran says, "I get the point. I must make the moves to help Deborah even though she is being unfair to me and treating me unkindly."

"Yes," Jesus says, "that's what it means to be dead to self. But when you lose your life, you'll find it, don't forget that."

As she goes to bed that night, she asks Jesus to give her clear guidance on what she should do to restore her relationship with Deborah and not to let her hurt feelings control her actions.

 

[Shimmie]

Oh My Goodness! This is so good...

But you left 'me' hanging; what happen to Fran and Deborah? Did they make amends?

What else did Jesus say to Fran? I love this conversation between Him and Fran.

Thanks for sharing this; it's a wonderful way to spend my morning as I'm sitting here relaxing and enjoying my cup of warm green tea and fresh lemon. And yet being 'filled' with the love of God through this message.

Please post the rest of it...I'm getting another cup of tea.

 

[Rainbow Dash]

His ways and thoughts are higher than mine.

My fleshly feelings would have wanted Jesus to comfort me due to my hurt feelings. I would have been like Fran, " Lord did you not hear how she talked to me and I aint do nothing."

It is by His grace. Lord thank you for your ways.

 

[joy2day]

Love the story Laela, I hope you post more. It is ministering to me, because in a lot of instances, I would "blow the relationship off" instead of communicating with the Lord about it, like Fran did. I think miscommunication and lack of understanding ends good friendships unnecessarily sometimes. Thank God she was humble enough to hear the Lord. The conversation between them is beautiful, and quite touching.

 

[PinkPebbles]

Indeed this is a great story on how misunderstandings and miscommunication can cause division and end great friendships....

It takes a humble heart to be able to accept correction, reach out to someone and then restore what was lost.

Thanks for sharing

 

[Laela]

joy2day, Shimmie ... I enjoyed it as well and couldn't wait to open my inbox this morning.. lol .. Here's the rest of the story. I'll post the link to her site. I find her daily encouragements are always on time Word.
God bless today all you ladies who have posted and who are reading!



Fran & Jesus on the Job - Hurt Feelings
As written and presented by Mary Whelchel

When someone hurts my feelings, my natural response is to have a pity party and then to get even. I think that's probably true for most of us. However, as believers, that is not a Spirit-controlled response, and so we must learn how to handle hurt feelings. Fran is learning that painful lesson.

It's Monday morning, and her friend Deborah said some hurtful and unfair things to Fran on the phone yesterday, after treating her very coldly at church. She talks with Jesus about the situation. "Lord, what should I do? I honestly don't feel I have anything to apologize for to Deborah; it's her perception that has created this problem. Besides, if she had something against me, the Bible says she should have come to me and told me in love, not in the sarcastic way she dumped it on me."

"That's absolutely true, Fran," Jesus agrees, "but just because she didn't behave biblically is no excuse for you to do the same."

"Yes, you're right, Lord, but it's so hard to swallow your pride and act like you're wrong when you know you're not," Fran says.

"I'm not asking you to apologize for something you didn't do, but I am asking you who are strong to bear with the failings of the weak and not to please yourself," Jesus again reminds her of the verse from Romans 15:1.

"Okay, what should I do? Call her?" Fran asks.

"Why not find a really nice card and send that first. Then follow-up with a phone call," Jesus suggests.

At lunch Fran writes a note on a card: Deborah, I'm so sorry something has come between us and I want you to know I'm willing to do whatever I can to restore our relationship. I hope you'll give me an opportunity; I'll call soon. Love, Fran.

She mails the card, and then all week long she prays for Deborah and for their relationship. She prays that God will help her see Deborah as he sees her and that God will give her compassion and true love for Deborah. On Thursday evening she gives Deborah a call.

"Hi, Deborah," Fran begins, and they have a lengthy conversation. Fran mostly listens as Deborah dumps some pretty difficult things on Fran, accusing her of not ever being available when Deborah needs a friend, and thinking that her life is more important that Deborah's. Fran says she is sorry for all the misunderstanding, and invites her home after church Sunday. Deborah says she can't this Sunday, but maybe another time.

Fran hangs up the phone, and says, "Lord, I don't feel as though there was any real closure. Deborah still believes I'm to blame for our relationship problems, and she wouldn't accept my invitation."

"You're not responsible for her reaction, just yours. This is not the end of the story, Fran; entrust it into my hands, and keep praying about Deborah. Right now, do nothing," Jesus says.

"But surely I have to do something..." Fran insists.

"No, not now," and with that, Fran drops the subject.

The Christian Working Woman: http://christianworkingwoman.org/about

 

[plainj]

Waiting on the edge of my seat for the next installment. As I read through this, I am thinking about my own friend who I am having an issue with. Just like Deborah, my friend, is not yet as mature in Christ as I am. So this really helps me think about how to handle my own friend, and how I need to see things differently in our relationship as well. Thanks for posting.

 

[Rainbow Dash]

I love the part where the Lord told Fran that she was only responsible for her own actions. Many times when we feel wronged, we respond in a way that is not pleasing to the Lord.

This lesson is helping me. Lord knows I have failed in this area. Especially when it was done by those I thought I could trust. I responded out of anger and my anger grew into unforgiveness. I wanted them to apologize for what they did to me but they pretended as though nothing was wrong. But I was wrong in my response of anger and unforgiveness.

God used all of that to break me and He is continuing to make me.

For what glory is it, if, when ye be buffeted for your faults, ye shall take it patiently? but if, when ye do well, and suffer for it, ye take it patiently, this is acceptable with God. 1 Peter 2:20

For even hereunto were ye called: because Christ also suffered for us, leaving us an example, that ye should follow his steps: Who did no sin, neither was guile found in his mouth: Who, when he was reviled, reviled not again; when he suffered, he threatened not; but committed himself to him that judgeth righteously: 1 Peter 2:21-23

There are precious spiritual jewels in this lesson.

 

[makeupgirl]

Even though the lesson is about humility (at least that's what I got out of it) and coming to Jesus for all of ours fears, hurts, and dismay and how to take responsiblity for our own actions, I"m going to be a tad frank here.

Maybe it's me but it looks like Deborah is the one that needs to get over herself and quit it with the pity party. I mean Fran has kids, that's her top priority. Did she really expect for Fran to stop taking care of her kids to cater to her? Her kids needed their mother just as much as Deborah does. It just seem that Deborah in this situation is being completely selfish.

**I'm seriously trying not to sound harsh...**

I personally would have just said, "ok i'm sorry you're hurt and anything that I have done to contribute to that but my kids are my top priority at this moment as their mother but we can sat aside some time when it's convenient for both of us...does this sound ok?" of course I would pray about it first.

However, let us remember that sometimes friends are in our lives for a reason, season, or for life.

All in all...this was a good lesson and looking forward to the outcome.

 

[PinkPebbles]

"You're not responsible for her reaction, just yours. This is not the end of the story, Fran; entrust it into my hands, and keep praying about Deborah. Right now, do nothing," Jesus says.

This statement really stood out to me. There is definitely more to the story. Jesus knows something about Deborah that haven't been revealed to Fran yet; that's why Jesus told Fran to pray for Deborah and do nothing.

Whenever God tells us to do something it's for a reason. Jesus is definitely working behind the scenes in this situation and I predict that Fran is going to learn a valuable lesson from this situation.

God already has Deborah's heart, now He is working on Fran's heart so that both of them will be able to learn a valuable lesson.

sidenote: I feel like this is a TV episode...and look forward to the next scene...lol!

 

[Shimmie]

joy2day, Shimmie ... I enjoyed it as well and couldn't wait to open my inbox this morning.. lol .. Here's the rest of the story. I'll post the link to her site. I find her daily encouragements are always on time Word.
God bless today all you ladies who have posted and who are reading!



Fran & Jesus on the Job - Hurt Feelings
As written and presented by Mary Whelchel

When someone hurts my feelings, my natural response is to have a pity party and then to get even. I think that's probably true for most of us. However, as believers, that is not a Spirit-controlled response, and so we must learn how to handle hurt feelings. Fran is learning that painful lesson.

It's Monday morning, and her friend Deborah said some hurtful and unfair things to Fran on the phone yesterday, after treating her very coldly at church. She talks with Jesus about the situation. "Lord, what should I do? I honestly don't feel I have anything to apologize for to Deborah; it's her perception that has created this problem. Besides, if she had something against me, the Bible says she should have come to me and told me in love, not in the sarcastic way she dumped it on me."

"That's absolutely true, Fran," Jesus agrees, "but just because she didn't behave biblically is no excuse for you to do the same."

"Yes, you're right, Lord, but it's so hard to swallow your pride and act like you're wrong when you know you're not," Fran says.

"I'm not asking you to apologize for something you didn't do, but I am asking you who are strong to bear with the failings of the weak and not to please yourself," Jesus again reminds her of the verse from Romans 15:1.

"Okay, what should I do? Call her?" Fran asks.

"Why not find a really nice card and send that first. Then follow-up with a phone call," Jesus suggests.

At lunch Fran writes a note on a card: Deborah, I'm so sorry something has come between us and I want you to know I'm willing to do whatever I can to restore our relationship. I hope you'll give me an opportunity; I'll call soon. Love, Fran.

She mails the card, and then all week long she prays for Deborah and for their relationship. She prays that God will help her see Deborah as he sees her and that God will give her compassion and true love for Deborah. On Thursday evening she gives Deborah a call.

"Hi, Deborah," Fran begins, and they have a lengthy conversation. Fran mostly listens as Deborah dumps some pretty difficult things on Fran, accusing her of not ever being available when Deborah needs a friend, and thinking that her life is more important that Deborah's. Fran says she is sorry for all the misunderstanding, and invites her home after church Sunday. Deborah says she can't this Sunday, but maybe another time.

Fran hangs up the phone, and says, "Lord, I don't feel as though there was any real closure. Deborah still believes I'm to blame for our relationship problems, and she wouldn't accept my invitation."

"You're not responsible for her reaction, just yours. This is not the end of the story, Fran; entrust it into my hands, and keep praying about Deborah. Right now, do nothing," Jesus says.

"But surely I have to do something..." Fran insists.

"No, not now," and with that, Fran drops the subject.

The Christian Working Woman: http://christianworkingwoman.org/about

Laela,

Thanks so much... the timing is perfect for I'm having lunch right now (tomato soup). I can sit, relax and have another cup of green tea while reading this wonderful message.

 

[Shimmie]

This is so good. It reminds me of a Christian radio program called "UnShackled".

A very beautiful and timely message.

Again...thanks so much for sharing this Laela.

My daughter and I were sharing the other day about feelings. When our feelings get hurt, the difference is in how 'we' respond and how we allow ourselves to feel.

We can't control what the other person says or does, yet we can control how we allow it to make us feel and respond/react to it.

I have a powerful testimony to share how God 'changed' something that I chose to react to by prayer instead of reacting in my flesh.

http://www.unshackled.org/

 

[Laela]

I can appreciate your post Makeupgirl... Always look forward to your comments. While I feel you on some of this... I highlighted what stood out for me in your comments.

I've learned (and am still learning) that it's the voice of God when we're urged or compelled to do/say something we don't want to do... it's flesh fighting the Holy Spirit.

As Health&Hair so deftly put it God's ways ARE higher than ours. So it's a lesson on looking past self to really hear God speak to us.

It wasn't that Deb needed to be a priority over Fran's family... you missed that. This would defeat the purpose of balance and cause Fran to sin. God wouldn't cause anyone to sin. What He was doing was letting Fran come to the knowledge of where she stands concerning Him.

This is the perfect story to paint that picture. It's flesh fighting the Holy Spirit. It's a daily battle -- dying to self. I know you know that. This is why a personal relationship with Him is so vital. What Jesus may tell you to do/say may not be what He tells me to. He sees the big picture. For Fran, what I see was a test, to get her to the next level. She had to learn that how she allowed Deborah to make her feel had nothing to do with Deborah! Growth hurts...

I hope I'm making sense here.

I personally would have just said, "ok i'm sorry you're hurt and anything that I have done to contribute to that but my kids are my top priority at this moment as their mother but we can sat aside some time when it's convenient for both of us...does this sound ok?" of course I would pray about it first.

However, let us remember that sometimes friends are in our lives for a reason, season, or for life.

All in all...this was a good lesson and looking forward to the outcome.

 

[Laela]

thank you for your post... it's a Word for me. ITA there are precious spiritual jewels in this lesson! Amein~

I love the part where the Lord told Fran that she was only responsible for her own actions. Many times when we feel wronged, we respond in a way that is not pleasing to the Lord.

There are precious spiritual jewels in this lesson.

Yes, please, do share, Shimmie! I look forward to your testimony...

I have a powerful testimony to share how God 'changed' something that I chose to react to by prayer instead of reacting in my flesh.

 

[Shimmie]

Ye, please, do share, Shimmie! I look forward to your testimony...

On my job we alternate taking our vacation during the Christmas / New Year holidays to be with our families for an extended holiday time.

Last year the co-worker that I 'alternate' with had the entire holiday off meaning this year was my turn.

The co-worker orders office supplies and the office calendar where our days out of the office are logged. The co-worker 'hid' the calendar for 2011 and when it was time to display it after the New Year, I noticed she had blocked out the week of Christmas and the Wednesday prior to Thanksgiving for her vacation to keep me from doing so. Although she had just taken these days for year 2010; she blocked them for year 2011.

I started to see my boss about this and have her 'change' it. I knew that not only would my boss have changed it to allow me to have the time off, but it would also disparage he character of my coworker. For me this would have been both vindication and vengence.

Instead, my daughter and I prayed about this and chose to allow God to have it. I left it alone, however I was still perched and ready to 'pounce' my coworker for being so deceptive. Each time I wanted to give her the 'side eye' or a Christian beat down, God would remind me that I had given this to Him and literally told him, that I 'trust him in this situation.

God Did Something Totally Unexpected:

Last month my bosses (I have three (3) announced that the Board of Directors have given us the entire week of Christmas / New Years off and with full pay. We are literally shutting down the office for the entire holiday. It totals 12 days off (counting consecutively Christmas Eve and both weekends. And this will not affect any of our accumulated vacation and/or comp days.

By choosing to pray and allowing God to have this, He gave me far more than I expected. Even more, God gave every staff person this time off, He...God, shut the entire office down for this holiday season.

This has NEVER happened in the history of our organization., let alone any of the jurisdictions connected to us. It just doesn't ...has not....ever happened. What God did was to bring 'peace' within the office.

Choosing God never fails over any area of our lives.

Laela, thank you for allowing me to share.

 

[makeupgirl]

I can appreciate your post Makeupgirl... Always look forward to your comments. While I feel you on some of this... I highlighted what stood out for me in your comments.

I've learned (and am still learning) that it's the voice of God when we're urged or compelled to do/say something we don't want to do... it's flesh fighting the Holy Spirit.

As Health&Hair so deftly put it God's ways ARE higher than ours. So it's a lesson on looking past self to really hear God speak to us.

It wasn't that Deb needed to be a priority over Fran's family... you missed that. This would defeat the purpose of balance and cause Fran to sin. God wouldn't cause anyone to sin. What He was doing was letting Fran come to the knowledge of where she stands concerning Him.

This is the perfect story to paint that picture. It's flesh fighting the Holy Spirit. It's a daily battle -- dying to self. I know you know that. This is why a personal relationship with Him is so vital. What Jesus may tell you to do/say may not be what He tells me to. He sees the big picture. For Fran, what I see was a test, to get her to the next level. She had to learn that how she allowed Deborah to make her feel had nothing to do with Deborah! Growth hurts...

I hope I'm making sense here.

Ok, I understand now....I was working at the same time so I was skimming (a little too fast I see, lol)

Thanks Laela

 

[joy2day]

Wow. This is such a beautiful story, I can't get over how much I am enjoying this. It's like, you never know how your reaction to a situation can literally change the course of a person's life. What Fran does here is really going to be a deliverance for Deborah, once the Lord releases her to act. And surely both will be blessed by the experience. When we have these interactions with people on a daily basis we don't realize (at least I don't always realize) how vital it really is to be in the Spirit and not in the flesh. God is looking to use us to bring healing in conflicts, but we have to be humble and let Him in.

You know how you know something, but you just get a fresh revelation of it? Well, that's me right now, y'all excuse me.

Shimmie, that was a powerful testimony.

God is truly dealing with me today on this. Laela, thanks again for starting this thread.

 

[Nice & Wavy]

On my job we alternate taking our vacation during the Christmas / New Year holidays to be with our families for an extended holiday time.

Last year the co-worker that I 'alternate' with had the entire holiday off meaning this year was my turn.

The co-worker orders office supplies and the office calendar where our days out of the office are logged. The co-worker 'hid' the calendar for 2011 and when it was time to display it after the New Year, I noticed she had blocked out the week of Christmas and the Wednesday prior to Thanksgiving for her vacation to keep me from doing so. Although she had just taken these days for year 2010; she blocked them for year 2011.

I started to see my boss about this and have her 'change' it. I knew that not only would my boss have changed it to allow me to have the time off, but it would also disparage he character of my coworker. For me this would have been both vindication and vengence.

Instead, my daughter and I prayed about this and chose to allow God to have it. I left it alone, however I was still preched and ready to 'pounce' my coworker for being so deceptive. Each time I wanted to give her the 'side eye' or a Christian beat down, God would remind me that I had given this to Him and literally told him, that I 'trust him in this situation.

God Did Something Totally Unexpected:

Last month my bosses (I have three (3) announced that the Board of Directors have given us the entire week of Christmas / New Years off and with full pay. We are literally shutting down the office for the entire holiday. It totals 12 days off (counting consecutively Christmas Eve and both weekends. And this will not affect any of our accumulated vacation and/or comp days.

By choosing to pray and allowing God to have this, He gave me far more than I expected. Even more, God gave every staff person this time off, He shut the entire office down for this holiday season.

This has NEVER happened in the history of our organizaion., let alone any of the jurisdictions connected to us. It just doesn't ...has not....ever happened. What God did was to bring 'peace' within the office.

Choosing God never fails over any area of our lives.

Laela, thank you for allowing me to share.

@joy2day, @Shimmie ... I enjoyed it as well and couldn't wait to open my inbox this morning.. lol .. Here's the rest of the story. I'll post the link to her site. I find her daily encouragements are always on time Word.
God bless today all you ladies who have posted and who are reading!



Fran & Jesus on the Job - Hurt Feelings
As written and presented by Mary Whelchel

When someone hurts my feelings, my natural response is to have a pity party and then to get even. I think that's probably true for most of us. However, as believers, that is not a Spirit-controlled response, and so we must learn how to handle hurt feelings. Fran is learning that painful lesson.

It's Monday morning, and her friend Deborah said some hurtful and unfair things to Fran on the phone yesterday, after treating her very coldly at church. She talks with Jesus about the situation. "Lord, what should I do? I honestly don't feel I have anything to apologize for to Deborah; it's her perception that has created this problem. Besides, if she had something against me, the Bible says she should have come to me and told me in love, not in the sarcastic way she dumped it on me."

"That's absolutely true, Fran," Jesus agrees, "but just because she didn't behave biblically is no excuse for you to do the same."

"Yes, you're right, Lord, but it's so hard to swallow your pride and act like you're wrong when you know you're not," Fran says.

"I'm not asking you to apologize for something you didn't do, but I am asking you who are strong to bear with the failings of the weak and not to please yourself," Jesus again reminds her of the verse from Romans 15:1.

"Okay, what should I do? Call her?" Fran asks.

"Why not find a really nice card and send that first. Then follow-up with a phone call," Jesus suggests.

At lunch Fran writes a note on a card: Deborah, I'm so sorry something has come between us and I want you to know I'm willing to do whatever I can to restore our relationship. I hope you'll give me an opportunity; I'll call soon. Love, Fran.

She mails the card, and then all week long she prays for Deborah and for their relationship. She prays that God will help her see Deborah as he sees her and that God will give her compassion and true love for Deborah. On Thursday evening she gives Deborah a call.

"Hi, Deborah," Fran begins, and they have a lengthy conversation. Fran mostly listens as Deborah dumps some pretty difficult things on Fran, accusing her of not ever being available when Deborah needs a friend, and thinking that her life is more important that Deborah's. Fran says she is sorry for all the misunderstanding, and invites her home after church Sunday. Deborah says she can't this Sunday, but maybe another time.

Fran hangs up the phone, and says, "Lord, I don't feel as though there was any real closure. Deborah still believes I'm to blame for our relationship problems, and she wouldn't accept my invitation."

"You're not responsible for her reaction, just yours. This is not the end of the story, Fran; entrust it into my hands, and keep praying about Deborah. Right now, do nothing," Jesus says.

"But surely I have to do something..." Fran insists.

"No, not now," and with that, Fran drops the subject.

The Christian Working Woman: http://christianworkingwoman.org/about

What a blessing...thank you for these two stories....I'm humbled!

 

[Shimmie]

Amen Sis.... I love this thread and for the past two days of Laela's posting this messages, I have been blessed with peace and quiet at my desk during my break times to read this without any interruptions.

God wanted me to really read this and have some quiet time without distractions to receive His personal message to me through this.

It's been a long time since I've been able to completely read a post/thread without being distracted or without multi-tasking. This time was very special... indeed.

 

[Nice & Wavy]

Amen Sis.... I love this thread and for the past two days of @Laela's posting this messages, I have been blessed with peace and quiet at my desk during my break times to read this without any interruptions.

God wanted me to really read this and have some quiet time without distractions to receive His personal message to me through this.

It's been a long time since I've been able to completely read a post/thread without being distracted or without multi-tasking. This time was very special... indeed.

I'm not able to read LHCF at work anymore...been so busy! This thread is a blessing...I've read it again since I posted last. Blessed, indeed!

 

[Shimmie]

Ok, I understand now....I was working at the same time so I was skimming (a little too fast I see, lol)

Thanks Laela

The same happens to me as well, I'm usually multi-tasking or being distracted and I have to 'skim' through the posts/threads.

 

[lacreolegurl]

Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!
I literally just finished a very long, very non-Christian vent about my hurt feelings...right after Bible study. Complete with neck rolling and a few 'I wish they woulds'. Just sad, I know.
I can't wait to read the next installment. This is truly ministering to me as well.

 

[Shimmie]

Re-reading and waiting for more of the message... :Rose:

 

[blazingthru]

This is so good. It reminds me of a Christian radio program called "UnShackled".

I use to listen to this when I lived in New York, but it use to come on at 12 am I use to wake up and listen to it and go back to sleep. I haven't heard it since.

 

[Laela]

I'm glad others are blessed by this...I'm just now reading this last installment. Be blessed!~

Fran & Jesus on the Job - Hurt Feelings
As written and presented by Mary Whelchel

When someone hurts your feelings and accuses you of things of which you know you're not guilty, what do you do? Hurt feelings are difficult to deal with. Often we don't handle them well.

The verse which Jesus has emphasized to Fran through all of this has been Romans 15:1: "We who are strong ought to bear with the failings of the weak and not to please ourselves." Fran has been meditating on that verse all week. On this Friday morning, in her time alone with Jesus, she says, "This is not the easiest verse to apply to my life, Lord. I still struggle with what Deborah said to me last night. You know it wasn't true."

"I know that you never intended to give her the impression that you were too busy for her, and I know that you went out of your way for her. But," Jesus says, "you must remember that she has had a lot of time to think about some little things that happened, and the more she has thought about them, the bigger they have become in her mind until she is convinced that you have not been a good friend to her."

"Lord, do I give the impression that I think I'm more important...." Fran considers Deborah's accusations. "Oh, my, I hope not, but I bet I do sometimes. Oh, Lord, please forgive me for thinking that I'm more important than someone else. I really am sorry."

"It's a good lesson to learn from all this, Fran," Jesus says with great comfort in his voice. "So learn it and then move on. Don't wallow in false guilt. The ball is now in Deborah's court."

"But what if she just continues to be cold and unfriendly to me? What am I supposed to do?" Fran asks.

"Wait," Jesus says.

"Several times I've asked her to take on a job at church and she always turns them down. I think if she got busy doing something positive, she wouldn't feel so sorry for herself," Fran says.

"You're right about that Fran," Jesus says; "it's often true that idle minds create a great many misunderstandings and hurt feelings. So, it's time to fill your mind with the Word of God so that doesn't happen to you."

And with that Fran gets into her Bible reading for the day.

If you've ever had your feelings hurt, you can understand how Fran feels. But take a step back, pray about it, ask God to teach you what you need to learn, and then stop focusing on the bad reports, but as Philippians 4:8 says, think about the lovely things-the good reports.

 

[Laela]

Shimmie... wow! you know I love me some testimony.. lol and yours is right on time. Goes to show when God does anything, it's not halfway or half-shod. He sure did 'fix' things for you when you put it in His hands. Awesome living testimony!!

 

[mrselle]

This thread is so timely for me. God has been gently dealing with me about the roll I may play in my relationships that have gone sour and today the sermon was about seeing ourselves...not focusing on what others do to us and then justifying our behavior, but seeing ourselves and the things we do.

 

[Iwanthealthyhair67]

this is good stuff and really blessed me...the high road is the way take always