feeling pretty low...

[determine3]

Hey Ladies,

I'm feeling pretty down today. Last night, I took out my braids and texturized my hair and i'm so disappointed in my hair length. I swear, all this time I thought my hair was longer than it is. Not only that, but my hair sucks! it has no shape or style or nothing. Last year, I cut my hair off to grow it out healthy and natural. I feel like I wasted my time. I have been putting so much effort into my hair and I feel likes it's been in vain. Sorry for the boo-hoo but i'm feeling pretty shi%ty. I don't want to give up on my journey, which to tell you the honest goodness truth, i'd be happy with APL hair, but damn, i've invested a lot of money into this head of mine. My hubby asked me (very innocently) is your hair even growing? He has been by my side thru this whole thing and has always encouraged me.
I'm starting to think that braids are not doing it for me but my hair is not cute...seriously. I wore it out for the first time in a curly kinda afro but I felt weird. I dunno, maybe i'm too used to weaves and braids. Maybe I need to learn to love myself and embrace myself.

Please ladies, I need encouragement. This time, I'm on bended knees

 

[Silkycoils]

Hi there,

Do not fret, you are not alone. Now, I didn't look at your hair type, but you did say that you "texturized" it. Is it possible that b/c your hair is not fully relaxed or maybe the texturizer didn't loosen the curl so you are not fully able to see the length? I am a 4a/4b and TRUST ME, shrinkage is no joke!!! You can see pictures in my album of me right b4 a first time relaxer and right after and it's not a game. You wouldn't have thought I had that much hair on my head.

I understand about not liking your current look. Try this, look at yourself in the mirror and b4 the negative thoughts creep in, say, "I am a child of God (if you believe in a higher power) and I am BEE-You-ti-ful!!!" And then say, "Hey there Gorgeous!!!" I'm telling you, whenever I find myself being overly critical about my appearance, I do this and it works!!!

 

[myco]

It's probably no where as bad as you think. Textured hair does not show length the same way that bone straight hair does. You say you texturized your hair and then wore a curly afro, that means your strands are curling back on themselves as opposed to just hanging down.

Look for other signs of progress besides just length. Does it have more shine? What about elasticity and softness? Has the density of your hair increased? All of these are signs that your hair is healthy and that your work is not in vain.

Don't give up the fight after the first round.

 

[luckymonkey1307]

Please don't get down on yourself, I have too felt this, especially in the beginning of my hair journey. Maybe braids are not the right thing for you? Or maybe you are just paying too much attention to your hair so it looks as if it is not growing.

You could try increasing your protein intake and keeping your hair extra moisturized with less manipulation. Keep your head up, and give it to the lord

 

[Victory1]

Hey Ladies,

I'm feeling pretty down today. Last night, I took out my braids and texturized my hair and i'm so disappointed in my hair length. I swear, all this time I thought my hair was longer than it is. Not only that, but my hair sucks! it has no shape or style or nothing. Last year, I cut my hair off to grow it out healthy and natural. I feel like I wasted my time. I have been putting so much effort into my hair and I feel likes it's been in vain. Sorry for the boo-hoo but i'm feeling pretty shi%ty. I don't want to give up on my journey, which to tell you the honest goodness truth, i'd be happy with APL hair, but damn, i've invested a lot of money into this head of mine. My hubby asked me (very innocently) is your hair even growing? He has been by my side thru this whole thing and has always encouraged me.
I'm starting to think that braids are not doing it for me but my hair is not cute...seriously. I wore it out for the first time in a curly kinda afro but I felt weird. I dunno, maybe i'm too used to weaves and braids. Maybe I need to learn to love myself and embrace myself.

Please ladies, I need encouragement. This time, I'm on bended knees

Last year December 23rd, I felt the same way. I got a touch up after 13 weeks and decided to go to Salon, big mistake! I have pretty fine hair, the guy did not know what he was doing. My hair came out in clunk doing the wash. I was so discourage after the touch-up, not only did my hair look horrible but it was shorter then the last time I got a relaxer. I stopped taking care of it, well I just put it in a ponytail all the time and stopped caring that it was exposed when I'm sleeping at night. To my shock on January 29th, I got together with friends and wore my hair down, I got so many compliments of on how good my hair looked and how long it was, all I kept saying really. Anyway, we all get discourage sometime but don't give up it will grow.

 

[determine3]

Ladies, thank you so much for your encouragement, last night I felt so alone with this journey. Who knew that finally paying attention to your hair and keeping it healthy could be such an emotional quest? Anyways, I've read and re-read some of your posts and it totally makes sense. I also keep forgetting that I BC'd my hair a year ago so it's back at the length it was b4 the chop, so yes it has grown, just slowly. I guess i'm so anxious to wear my own hair out that i'm watching my growth rate too much. I need to stop doing that. I agree with the fact that my hair is texturized and not straight. I remember, back in the relaxed days, I would relax and my hair would lie flat, my hair is still very puffy!

nlewis, myco, luckymonkey and victory1, thanks for taking the time to respond! I feel so much better

 

[determine3]

BTW...nlewis, wow, you're hair is gorgeous. Thanks for sending me to your pics. My hair type is about the same as yours so yes, major shrinkage.

Thanks.

 

[kizzylonghair]

Girl,

Please be encouraged I have posted when this hair growth thing seemed like it wasnt going anywhere.
I was so depressed to know that I was spending so much time, money and effort on my hair but it still was breaking. I literally gave up.

That was in Nov, when I look my progress pics I was so dissapointed look at my album.. But overall for 1 year of grow my hair did 360 degree turn and I appreciate my hair now.

Enough about me, but all I am saying that all of us at some point feel a little low, but try to keep your chin up and remember. You hair NEVER stops growing you will alawys get back to the point before the dissapointment.

I have learned to continue to look after it but not let it get to you as much

HTH

 

[Sistaslick]

I am glad you are feeling better! Don't get down girl! I know how you feel. I have those days when I am like- what am I even doing this for, I've been looking like a pauper for the sake of a protective style and nobody can ever see my length because its always bunned away Thats why I look forward to wash days when the hair lengthens out from its shriveled up airdried state. Its always a confidence booster

Don't ever give up though- it may not seem like it, but everyday with healthy hair is progress. Don't focus so much on length, because it seems when we just let our hair do its own thing and give it the basics, it thrives. When you shift the focus, it the joy of new length will be that much sweeter. Its good to take hair breaks now and then

 

[CinnaMocha]

Determine3,

I am glad to know that you are feeling better. We all go through those days when our hair just isn't our very best. It some of the hair growing pains that we have to face. It's just like that when we try to lose weight and then come to a plateua and feel like there isn't any change. Be encouraged and know that your hair will get back its body and look great!

 

[determine3]

Can I say I absolutely love you ladies!!!!!! I wanted to re-post my updates and didn't even realize there were more posts/support. Y'all make a sista want to go outside and HUG everyone

My update.... I am in LOVE with my hair!!!!!!!!!! Right now, i'm trying to perfect my regimen but currently, I co-wash daily switching between Sauve Strawberries and cream and coconut put a shower cap on and then rinse with cool water, while i'm still in the shower I might add some castor oil (while wet) and then shake my hair until the water is out. I put a towel on my head while I go about getting ready for work and when I take the towel down the curls are freaky but cute. I then add dabur vatika coconut oil and scrunch. Since my hair has no shape, I have to use a head band to give it shape/style, I actually fix it so my hair looks shorter than what it is. This style suits me. I do add 1 small pc. of weave in the front to give it a swoop. You can't see the weave attachment bc it's under the headband secured by a weave clip. When I come home at night, I add some oil and maybe some MTG and baggie. That's it.

I have never rec'd so many compliments. I can't wait until my curly afro grows bigger and fuller!

I have a few questions though...here goes...
1. I am not combing my hair since I don't really need to and I figure this equals less manipulation. Is this ok? I figure I can comb my hair out once a week.
2. texturizers...how long do texturizers normally last?
3. should I clarify on a regular basis?

Again, thanks in advance and please don't think im ungrateful if you posted me a reply and I didn't respond. I definately appreciate this! Is there a way to be notified if there is a reply to a thread you started? I'm not too good with the whole computer thing.

 

[MissYocairis]

Hey Ladies,

I'm feeling pretty down today. Last night, I took out my braids and texturized my hair and i'm so disappointed in my hair length. I swear, all this time I thought my hair was longer than it is. Not only that, but my hair sucks! it has no shape or style or nothing. Last year, I cut my hair off to grow it out healthy and natural. I feel like I wasted my time. I have been putting so much effort into my hair and I feel likes it's been in vain. Sorry for the boo-hoo but i'm feeling pretty shi%ty. I don't want to give up on my journey, which to tell you the honest goodness truth, i'd be happy with APL hair, but damn, i've invested a lot of money into this head of mine. My hubby asked me (very innocently) is your hair even growing? He has been by my side thru this whole thing and has always encouraged me.
I'm starting to think that braids are not doing it for me but my hair is not cute...seriously. I wore it out for the first time in a curly kinda afro but I felt weird. I dunno, maybe i'm too used to weaves and braids. Maybe I need to learn to love myself and embrace myself.

Please ladies, I need encouragement. This time, I'm on bended knees

Did you keep your hair in good condition while in braids using the Crown and Glory method? I'm also concerned that you texturized right after taking your braids down . That's pretty dangerous. Hair needs to be detangled, washed, fortified and deep conditioned before you start adding chemical straighteners to it after braids.

 

[MissYocairis]

Also, I dont know if everyone experiences this, but, for me, over the last year, I actually went through a period where my hair grew slower and a period where it grew faster. Almost like a "rest stage" versus a "growth spurt". You may be in a "rest stage". Give it time and stay steadfast on your regimen. If you are going to do braids, follow crown and glory like your life depends on it.

 

[determine3]

Also, I dont know if everyone experiences this, but, for me, over the last year, I actually went through a period where my hair grew slower and a period where it grew faster. Almost like a "rest stage" versus a "growth spurt". You may be in a "rest stage". Give it time and stay steadfast on your regimen. If you are going to do braids, follow crown and glory like your life depends on it.
__________________

No more braids for me for a long time! I'm trying to learn to manage my own hair for awhile. Trust me, the last week of haircare has been better for me than the last 3 months. I love cowashing. I did do the crown and glory*-i was just so bored with the whole braided hair look. The funny thing is, i was looking through my pics that I have in my computer of me and my family for the last 3 or so years, and every single one of me has FAKE hair. I never realized until now how attached I was to an image. I'm getting better day by day.