Feeling Alone

julzinha

Well-Known Member
Hello,

This year has literally been one of the hardest years of my life. And my faith in God has literally went from agnostic to Christian believer. The back story is that I was diagnosed with depression in October, but before then I would pray and pray that the Lord would help me through it but everyday it worsened. I would have panic attacks so bad I would almost pass out and it got to the point where I was cutting myself and almost attempted suicide more than once. It got to the point where a friend called the health services for me because I wouldn't go because I honestly believed that it would get better. I am in my second year of college and I feel God didn't care. Not just because of that situation but me being at the school I am at now. When I was accepted I prayed that I made the right decision and several event in my life led me here, but once starting here I fee like I have had the most difficult two years of my life to the point where I feel like I don't have dreams anymore. I feel as though I have not only let myself down, but wavered so much in faith because at times like this when you are supposed to feel God near, I don't feel anything. I live day to day with ups and downs with some days hoping for death and other days are better. I guess my question is how do you ladies deal with feeling like you're alone in the world?
 
I was rushing through the forum tonight but had to pause at your post. I will pray for you.

To answer your question, one of my biggest blessings is that I have always loved memorising scripture. Sometimes when things are at there worse the Spirit pulls me back to a verse hidden away in me. I had a friend who asked me about post partum panic attacks few weeks ago. I told her about my use of scripture, particularly Philipians 4:6-7 Be careful for nothing; but in everything by prayer and suplication with thanksgiving let you requests be made known unto God. And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus. (The NIV says Be anxious for nothing)

For some reason I feel like you should also check Mark 11: 22-26. I tend to write scriptures on index cards also and carry them around with me. Particularly those that 'jumps out at me' when I'm reading my Bible. They always prove to be relevant later on.

Don't be ashamed to seek medical help, but know that God will help you. Get to know Him and know what His words says about you and you will be amazed when you start enjoying being 'alone' with Him.

Julzina, my prayer for you is what Paul prayed for the Ephesians in Ephesian 3:19, That you may know the love of Christ, which passeth knowledge, and that you might be filled with all the fullness of God.

I pray He completely delivers you from satan's stronghold and hide you in the shelter of His wings. In Jesus Name.

Many of us have been through extreme loneliness and other temptations even though we were saved for some time. Check the 'Wilderness testimonies' thread if you can find it. I'm sure others would give more input to help you.
 
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You are not alone. There are many people that walk this earth that have the same feelings as you.

Are you a member of any organizations, groups, etc. I would suggest a therapist or an accupunturists. Talk therapy really does work.
 
Praying that you will no longer be hindered by the spirit of depression. I speak life, joy, and peace in Jesus Name.

First I think you should get to the root of your problem. Is this an unresolved issue or chemical imbalance?

Are you around people? Find a good church family to connect with.

Sing, praise, worship. Find songs that lift you up and help you focus on the Lord.

Isaiah 61:3 Christ came to give us...
To console those who mourn in Zion, To give them beauty for ashes,
The oil of joy for mourning, The garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; That they may be called trees of righteousness, The planting of the LORD, that He may be glorified

Do daily confessions of the scriptures. Find scriptures that speak to your situation and declare them over you. LEAN ON THE POWER OF GOD IN HIS WORD.

Psalm 42:11 Why are you cast down, O my soul? And why are you disquieted within me? Hope in God; For I shall yet praise Him,The help of my countenance and my God.

Do not listen to those negative thoughts. Do some fasting and prayer if you feel led. This can break some strongholds. I can tell you this is true, I've been there before.

Hope that this offers you some help. Know that you are blessed and that God loves you more than you know.
 
Hello,

This year has literally been one of the hardest years of my life. And my faith in God has literally went from agnostic to Christian believer. The back story is that I was diagnosed with depression in October, but before then I would pray and pray that the Lord would help me through it but everyday it worsened. I would have panic attacks so bad I would almost pass out and it got to the point where I was cutting myself and almost attempted suicide more than once. It got to the point where a friend called the health services for me because I wouldn't go because I honestly believed that it would get better. I am in my second year of college and I feel God didn't care. Not just because of that situation but me being at the school I am at now. When I was accepted I prayed that I made the right decision and several event in my life led me here, but once starting here I fee like I have had the most difficult two years of my life to the point where I feel like I don't have dreams anymore. I feel as though I have not only let myself down, but wavered so much in faith because at times like this when you are supposed to feel God near, I don't feel anything. I live day to day with ups and downs with some days hoping for death and other days are better. I guess my question is how do you ladies deal with feeling like you're alone in the world?[/QUOTE]
julzinha,
First of all Hi:hiya::bighug::rosebud:. I'm glad you asked your questions instead of keeping them to yourself:yep:. I will share some of my experiences with you some of which you may not see the relevance of until a later time but I'll share anyway b/c God loves you and you need to know that it's not based on circumstances, events, or feelings.
My heart goes out to you on the year being hard. I understand. I've had very difficult years and times when I felt like death would've been a better option. The older generation would say, "No matter what you're going through, there's always someone worse off than you." I would roll my eyes at that then, not so much now b/c it is the truth. The past few months have been very difficult for me in many ways. Perhaps the most profound is this, I lost my 1 month old grandson to SIDS this fall. I'm tearing up just from typing those words. It literally felt like a kind of emotional disembowelment. Even though I know that I know that I know he is fine and waiting on me, I miss him terribly. I'll never get to make him cookies, tickle him, watch him walk, hear his voice, tell him not to date this girl or that girl, etc. He was with us for exactly 1 month. We were so excited he was turning 1 month old... A couple who joined my church recently lost their 2 week old daughter who was born prematurely. I could wonder why God would allow such tragedies involving the innocent. I don't. Sadness, pain, disappointment happens to all human beings saved or not. The difference lies in the real hope and assurance each believer has while those who do not believe have limited and flawed means which in due time all fail. We got twice as much time as they did. We have twice as many pics, twice as many hugs, twice as many kisses, twice as many diaper changes, you get the picture. The family of a stillborn never get to look into that child's eyes, never get to change a diaper, never get to hear a cry. The family of the aborted/miscarried never get to hold a body, never get to look at a little face,never get to touch a face, or stroke the hair, you get the picture.

So, you may have made the right choice by attending your current school and you may have missed the mark so to speak. However, there is nothing too hard for God. One of the ways we grow in our faith is by going through difficulties. Difficulties expose and reveal any shortcomings and play up any acquired strengths. They remind us of how much we will always need God. It is during those time that God's strength becomes very evident. Not always immediately, but when you look back, (b/c hindsight is always 20/20) you realize you should have totally lost your mind but can see how God stepped in and strengthened you- so you didn't lose it when a lot of other folks did. In the event you weren't supposed to be there but are, well God can and will fix that too. Whether it means he changes your circumstances, gets you out of there, or whatever b/c you took the time to pray and seek His input prior to starting school he will honor your efforts even if you misunderstood his direction. He doesn't stop there, the more you seek him the clearer you will be able to tell when he is speaking to you, when it's you doing the talking and most importantly when the enemy is trying to speak to you. That's another one of his promises. He says his sheep (us) hear his voice, know him, and obey him. This process takes time but he protects you as you are growing from day to day.

Who said you are supposed to feel near God? Umm, that's not true:ohwell:. There are times when you will feel God's presence, when you will feel close to him but just as you may have family members or friends you love but don't feel all warm and fuzzy towards 24/7 so it is with God. He never stops loving and feeling that way towards us but we do him like that frequently:drunk:. You cannot rely on feeling. They are fickle. As you grow, you learn feelings have there place but there will be times where you have to just do it b/c you have been told to do it not b/c you can fully comprehend the logic behind the thing. Obedience is better than sacrifice.

Here are some ways I have learned to deal with those inevitable times where I feel heartbroken (I no longer feel alone or hopeless b/c I have seen with my own eyes God provide, come through, change circumstances, etc in my life, time and time again- keep walking, you'll get there). I too recommend reading scripture aloud and committing it to memory. Why? Every habit, destiny, character trait, etc starts in your mind. God created everything that is (except ppl) by speaking aloud. He endowed us with qualities similar to his. The ability to speak life into situations is one of them. Satan is out to rob all of us of our hope and joy. W/o them we are dry, lifeless, slowly dying, sitting ducks. A christian who knows the word of God and speaks it regularly can defeat the enemy. He has to back off. He has to respect the authority of God's word.
Songs- keep an arsenal of uplifting praise and worship music near you at all times. Praise also stops any attacks dead in their tracks. Eventually you will learn to praise w/o the music. Eventually, the music will be in your heart so that you will not need any outside devices and can break forth in song and praise at will. God inhabits the praise of his ppl. It is an immediate way to get his attention.
Read the bible so you can see all of the examples of ppl who went throught circumstances exactly like the ones you will go through. Read of those who went through successfully as well as those who gave up and their outcomes. There is nothing new in this world. It is all a big repeating circle. History repeats itself. David didn't have a PC and the like but he had many years of danger and depression to deal with before any relief was in sight.
Here are some ppl you may be able to identify with right now. Read of their histories. Get a NIV and KJV bible to study and compare if you find KJV too much right now. Read about Job, David, Ruth, Moses, Acts.
Keep praying. Then pray some more. Then pray a little more. Did I mention praying? PRAY. Then pray some more. It is an intimate conversation between you and the Almighty. He is waiting.
Above all, please understand that many times you will not feel anything special intially. You will be sleepy, you may suddenly not feel good, the phone will ring, your mind will attempt to wander like never before anytime you decide to try to hear from/ spend time with God. Persistence is key. Understand that God sees your life as it can be. You are seeing only what is in front of you right now.

Fellowship- Do you have a good church home? Any christian friends? Active in any student bible studies? Go out with and have fun with ppl who share your beliefs? If not begin to pray asking God to send these things your way but stay on this forum searching topics and talking to us. Send PMs or post away. This is fellowship too. Teams are stronger, more cohesive, better, b/c they fellowship (practice) together. We are many members of one body. Each with a specific purpose/ use. Made to work together but not very useful alone. I'm praying for God to strenthen your inner man, and to reveal his truth and love to you. You are loved more then you know.:yep:
www.christianword.org is an online prayer book. There are many prayers for many topics. It is a good start for a new believer.
 
Hey sis,

I totally understand your feelings. Have been there before.

The only offensive weapon that believers have is the sword of the spirit which is the word of God. As mentioned above, find scriptures that speak specifically to your situation. Find out what God has to say to you...He knew that you would need those words at this time in your life and He wants you to believe and depend on what He says.

The feeling of being alone is only atrick of the enemy...God said He would NEVER leave us nor forsake us.

You've been given some good Godly counsel above...pray about it...maybe you need a fast (to hear more clearly from God).

I will pray for you as well. And dont worry...you were born to win!
 
Hey sis,

I totally understand your feelings. Have been there before.

The only offensive weapon that believers have is the sword of the spirit which is the word of God. As mentioned above, find scriptures that speak specifically to your situation. Find out what God has to say to you...He knew that you would need those words at this time in your life and He wants you to believe and depend on what He says.

The feeling of being alone is only atrick of the enemy...God said He would NEVER leave us nor forsake us.

You've been given some good Godly counsel above...pray about it...maybe you need a fast (to hear more clearly from God).

I will pray for you as well. And dont worry...you were born to win!

I agree. Except that I believe there are two offensive weapons - prayer being the other one.

You're not alone, I've felt the same way.

Have you talked to God about it? Just talking to God about how you feel and everything? You can tell Him any and everything. Cast your burdens upon Him - I learned this from Dr. Charles Stanley: sometimes I just literally tell God everything that's bothering me and say, OK now I'm giving all of these things to You God. And even imagine handing them over and don't worry about them anymore - you have to trust God and if you have to, do this daily and ask God for forgiveness for picking those burdens back up and not trusting Him, then just give them back to Him. You'll see Him work it out in His timing - He will never fail you! Remember this is not just with physical problems, but with emotions too.

That's what really helped me, and sometimes I think that's why God allowed me to go through a lot of things - to bring me closer to Him.

And of course read the Word of God - it's often how God will speak to you and bring you closer to Him. It will also give you strength, hope, and love.

Pray before reading and ask God to speak encouragement into your heart and for your eyes and heart to be open to receive His Word.

You may not see the possibility of it getting better right now, but it will! I believed that I might stuck in darkness forever for quite a while, but it got better and I became closer to God.

This scripture is one of my favorites:

The LORD is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit. A righteous man may have many troubles, but the Lord delivers him from them all. - Psalm 34:18-19

To all who mourn in Israel, he will give a crown of beauty for ashes, a joyous blessing instead of mourning, festive praise instead of despair. In their righteousness, they will be like great oaks that the LORD has planted for his own glory. - Isaiah 61:3

Don't be afraid, for I am with you. Don't be discouraged, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you. I will hold you up with my victorious right hand. - Isaiah 41:10

The eternal God is your refuge, and underneath are the everlasting arms. - Deuteronomy 33:27

You are my lamp O Lord; the Lord turns my darkness into light.
- 2 Samuel 22:29
 
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