Do you snoop?

aja1121

aja1121

Well-Known Member
I am one of those females that swore up and down that if I met a man that gave me a reason, that I would just leave...........WELL, 2 years later I am still here.:wallbash: SAD, I know!

This is my confession, the worse thing I've done was use my 18X zoom camera to take a snapshot of an IM conversation he had.

Ok, that was hard to admit....I've only snooped a total of three times in the entire relationship, but during those 3 times I was a private eye!:nono:

:wallbash::nono::wallbash:
 
Living a life like that is hell! I know it.

Where you question every little thing he does, says, expression, etc. simply because you don't trust him and have had reason to second guess him.

Absolute hell. I never want to experience that again. Would not wish it on my worse enemy. :nono:
 
nvybeauty said:
Living a life like that is hell! I know it.

Where you question every little thing he does, says, expression, etc. simply because you don't trust him and have had reason to second guess him.

Absolute hell. I never want to experience that again. Would not wish it on my worse enemy. :nono:
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Right........I'll be ready to pack my stuff and leave and things will start to get blissful again! Every freaking time........it would be so much easier if we didn't live together and both names weren't on the lease!

LEARNING EXPERIENCE AND STILL LEARNING!
 
I used to be like this too in the beginning but that was because I didn't trust men at all. Even though I trusted him, there was still that little half a percent of I might get screwed. But after a year (long time I know) all that went away. And we're coming up on our four year anniversary.
 
aja1121 said:
Right........I'll be ready to pack my stuff and leave and things will start to get blissful again! Every freaking time........it would be so much easier if we didn't live together and both names weren't on the lease!

LEARNING EXPERIENCE AND STILL LEARNING!
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find a way to convince him to get your name off of the lease...leaving only his name. lovingly of course.:look:

then pack your bags and leave.
 
aja1121 said:
I am one of those females that swore up and down that if I met a man that gave me a reason, that I would just leave...........WELL, 2 years later I am still here.:wallbash: SAD, I know!

This is my confession, the worse thing I've done was use my 18X zoom camera to take a snapshot of an IM conversation he had.

Ok, that was hard to admit....I've only snooped a total of three times in the entire relationship, but during those 3 times I was a private eye!:nono:

:wallbash::nono::wallbash:
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That's some good thinking and execution of skill right there!! :lachen: :lachen:

Do what you have to do to feel comfortable, but draw the line......somewhere, but I would think 2 years would be enough.


she took a picture of his IM :lachen: :lachen:I love it!
 
If I have to snoop then I'm evidently not with the right man. Its my belief that if you have to snoop its because you cannot trust the one you're with.

I trust who I'm with. When I feel I can no longer trust him my ass will be gone. That would be like him snooping on me. I'm a very open book. he knows more about me than my own mother. If he was snooping around trying to find something I would be thoroughly offended, as I would expect him to be if I stooped that low.


I think that those who feel like they have to snoop should flip the script on themselves and honestly question how they would feel if they were the ones being snooped on.

-A
 
Arcadian said:
If I have to snoop then I'm evidently not with the right man. Its my belief that if you have to snoop its because you cannot trust the one you're with.

I trust who I'm with. When I feel I can no longer trust him my ass will be gone. That would be like him snooping on me. I'm a very open book. he knows more about me than my own mother. If he was snooping around trying to find something I would be thoroughly offended, as I would expect him to be if I stooped that low.


I think that those who feel like they have to snoop should flip the script on themselves and honestly question how they would feel if they were the ones being snooped on.

-A
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I guess I'm weird because he has gone through my phone before and I wasn't offended at all because I have nothing to hide....I'm the open book, he is fort knox. And he had the nerve to tell me he broke up with his last 2 exes because they were nosey. This is my first time snooping, I take responsibility for what I did, but obviously something ain't right and we have talked about his secrecy before he has opened up a little.But he talks about marriage all the time and us buying a house....you would think he wouldn't be so shady.
 
Working on this issue myself. The strange thing is that I do trust my SO, plan on marrying him soon.
I actually confessed to what I did, he never would have found out. But what I did didn't sit well with me, so I confessed. He was pissed.
I'm an open book and I feel like he's a bit secretive. Certain things he doesn't share with me and it bugs me.
I don't wanna know everything up front. I find it interesting for things to unfold. I just don't like surprises and I'm used to being phuqed over.
Case in point: found out first two kids Dad is bi by snooping. Yeah, traumatizing event.
 
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Ms. Plain Jane said:
Well what did the IM say? :look:
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I should post it lol:grin::grin:

Just kidding! I only got a chance to see a conversation with one chick, he took my camera card and I couldn't see the rest.

The one conversation wasn't too bad, a little flirting reminiscing on old times, she was mad because she wanted more out of the friendship, but he turned her down..............I smiled when I saw that!

BUT THEN! This ni**a asked her if she had any friends that he could holler at:nono:. She said no because it would hurt too bad and so he said that he was playing. I wonder if that would've been the same answer if she said yes. Anyway, I feel like he said that just to see how emotionally involved she was with him.

But he was having two conversations at the same time, couldn't catch the other one before he caught me:ohwell:. The other 2 times I snooped he cursed me out, this time is was nicer than normal.

It all began with me just wanting to see how good my camera really was (REALLY!).......if he wasn't so secretive I wouldn't have had a care in the world. I guess it really bothers me because I'm so open and I expect him to be the same way.
 
CoCoEspresso said:
Seek and ye shall find...
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You are so right! The first time I looked it was because I didn't think he was as emotionall invested and it would make it easier for me to leave him if I knew he was up to no good, now I don't care for some reason, I didn't have that intention this time. It was almost fun....and that is how I got caught because I was laughing and smirking with that "he thinks he's slick, I got something for him" vibe. Oh well, you live and you learn and as long as I'm still living, I'm learning!
 
My name is Ebonie and I AM A SNOOPER. My snooping comes predominantly from my own insecurities. I'm allowing my past relationships to linger in my present. I want so bad to stop, but it's addictive! LOL I use to check things ONLY from time to time until my bf started acting suspicious with his phone. At night he would turn it off, or hide it, or have the boo boo face when his phone rang. Eventually, I found he was talking to some girl. Supposedly, just a friend. Aren't they all? I really couldn't proove anything, the conversations weren't long, it was just at inappropiate times of the night. My concern came about when he started acting so suspicious with his phone. He usually leaves it casually around, this time it was always plastered at his side and turned off around 11 at night. I really need to stop, though. It's like, I'd rather never accept him, than embrace him and loose it. If I accept him as a dog, it won't be a surprise if anything happens. Okay, I've turned this post into a Dr. Phil vent lol No, really, I do have a problem :(
 
Well with my s/o, I've snooped on 2 different occasions.:ohwell: I do trust him, but I never liked the fact that he has sooo many female friends. I never really had a reason to snoop around though...
 
Nope! Just because I value my privacy, and I wouldn't want anyone to go through my stuff. :nono:

What I've found is that when my friends snoop and they find something (something incriminating regarding an infidelity), they bring it up to the man, he "explains"....they stay together, but she doesn't trust him still. It's like what's the point? I would like to think when one is going through someone else's things...they are looking for something, but what's the point of doing it if you're just gonna end up at square one? And then what happens when the guy finds out that he's being spied on? He's PO'd and wanting to break up with the girl for invading his privacy...and in situations that I've seen, the girl ends up begging for him to stay, and promises to never go through his stuff again (even though she found something). It's all just so mind boggling to me. :spinning: Sorry, I have a couple of friends that do this...I'll stop rambling now:lachen:
 
In our household we have an open door policy. If I or my husband wants to look at emails or cell phones or text messages, whatever it doesn't matter. We both feel that we should not hide anything from each other. Sometimes you do find things that are questionable but it opens up dialogue and allows us to talk about things that may have been overlooked. This may not work for everyone but it works for us.
 
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