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Do you get upset when other women question...

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</font><blockquote><font class="small">In reply to:</font><hr />
honey_jammz82 said:
I was at the gym today, and this man was there with his wife...he came up to me and was like "Is that all your hair?" I started cheezin and said yes. He walked off and goes "see baby I told you it was her hair!".

That is a great feeling, it has to be, because obviously having healthy and long hair for black women is not the norm, and when you know that all the hard work and dedication you put into your hair shows and others notice....it feels soooo good!
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I feel the same way...I just say yes...fluff it around with my fingers and smile.....cause I know I'm doing something right...
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Back in January 2009, an older employee (64 years old) in another department made a statement about my hair. I normally wear it in a protective style (bun) 95 percent of the time, so she hasn’t seen me wear it down yet—even though a few other employees have. While I was working at the scanning machine, she stopped by and said: “It looks like you have it (the bun) attached to the back of your head.” I told her: “This is my natural hair.” She said: “It looks full. Have you ever thought about wearing it down?” I said: “I have.” Then she went away.

About a month later (February), while I dropped some mail in her office, she said: “Your hair looks so straight.” I said: “It’s straighter, because I just came from the salon last Saturday.” Then she said: “Is that really all your hair?” I said: “Yes, and I just had a major trim--about 4 inches.” She stared at me as if I was lying. So she stood up and stepped behind me. I took down my bun, showed her my trim, and she was shocked! I said: “I like it better because my ends are even, but I didn’t realize my stylist trim that much off . . . because I never look in the mirror when he’s working on my hair. I didn’t realize my hair was falling short from the comb until a few days later." She looked puzzled. Then I said: “I extended my comb out, but the hair was falling short, because it was shorter. I normally don’t look in the mirror when I comb my hair.” Her eyes bucked. :shocked: Then she said: “It’s so long!” I said: “No it’s not, it used to be down here (mid back & waist length), now it’s at the tip of my bra clasp. See it’s not a weave. The right side was about five inches longer than the left side." Then I proceed to pull my hair in opposite directions to show her that there aren’t any tracks.” She said: “My hair has never been longer than neck length, but I cover it with a wig.”


Now listen to this: I was oiling my hair in the rest room two days ago--Monday (parted it into four sections), and she walks in and says hello. Then before she goes into the stall, she comes back in front of the mirror and laughs hysterically as if she's a small child having a ball at Disneyland or Magic Mountain: “I can’t believe your hair is this long!” Then she actually yanks it, :shocked: and then she does a serious, aggressive weave check with both of her hands as if she's turning pages in a book. Maybe she’s looking for “glued-on hair,” since she can’t find tracks. All the time she is still laughing hysterically. I remain calm by saying: “I told you this is not a weave. From time to time, strangers will ask if I’m wearing a weave, but I tell them the truth. This is my natural hair.”

Then she goes on to say: “My hair has never been beyond my neck! It’s very rare to see African American women with hair that length, unless it’s a weave. That has to be genetics.” I said: “There are women with long hair.” Then I catch myself, because I realize now that I can’t tell her any information about my regimen or the hair care boards, because she’s flaky.

She asked me to have lunch with her, (and it’s on her) a total of three times back in December and January. Each time I went to her office, she was no where to be found. No explanations or apologies either.


Would you believe til this day, she’s still asking me to have lunch with her? I give her some lame excuse every time now. Then she says: “I forgot or I had an errand to run, etc.” I told her: “Order the food any day, then let me know when it’s here. I’m too busy to go out for lunch now.” She said: “I’ll get the menu.” I say to myself: “Yeah right!”

Well, I know what a weave check feels like now, so I sympathize with you ladies. Now you see why I refuse to share my hair care regimen with women like this. If they ask for products, I’ll give them the crappy stuff that I no longer use on my hair. If they want healthy hair, let them figure it out for themselves.

Sorry for the long rant, but it's slow at the office . . . and I have to try to look busy.
 
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People who have been knowing me for years have the nerve to ask me if I'm wearing a weave! It's just that most of the time I wear it up, so they don't really see it growing in stages--but some can tell that its growing just by looking at the bun.

I just respond politely by telling them the truth that it's all mine, and sometimes I have to show them that there aren't any tracks, clip ons, extensions, bonded with glue, etc.

My stylist and I must be doing something right to get all of this attention when it's worn down. I take it has a compliment.
 
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Nope...I take it as a compliment!:yep: To think that some one thinks my hair is so lovely that it can't be real, is a compliment to me.
 
I used to get upset. I had one co-worker sneak up behind me and part my hair in the back looking for tracks. I had another co-worker (separate occasion) ask if my hair was mine and I said yes. She did gave me the old, tired line, "I guess it is, since you paid for it." It's ridiculous that some people would think it's impossible for black women to have thick, healthy hair. Some people are just so insecure, they can't give another woman a compliment. If it was me, I would ask the person how they got their hair in such great condition. Most people enjoy compliments!

Now, I just take it as a compliment. My hair must look pretty amazing!
 
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whether your hair is really all yours.
It happens to me all the time and it is obnoxious. Especially now that I have been wearing my hair blowdried or rollerset for the past month, people of all races and both genders have been asking if my hair is real, and a lot of black women will reach for my ponytail and tug it before they ask me if it's real.
 
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i swear the pastors wife ran her hands through my hair and scalp when she hugged me on Easter. And then tried to play it off like her hands got caught. i KNOW she didn't have the nerve to "track check" me up in church! if i wasn't a Christian.....:nono:

i don't mind the attention at times, but for the most part it saddens me that we aren't as equipped as we should be with healthy hair knowledge. healthy hair is something everyone wants but so few of us know how to get there. :sad:
 
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lol. another oldie.

i only got the question of whether or not my hair was mine when i was wearing braids. i always thought it was funny. if a friend or a coworker would ask, i would tell them that there is hair braided in with my own braids and explain how it's done. but if some random person asked me if it was all my hair, i'd say, "Why yes it is! I paid for it so it's mine!"

:D
 
i swear the pastors wife ran her hands through my hair and scalp when she hugged me on Easter. And then tried to play it off like her hands got caught. i KNOW she didn't have the nerve to "track check" me up in church! if i wasn't a Christian.....:nono:

i don't mind the attention at times, but for the most part it saddens me that we aren't as equipped as we should be with healthy hair knowledge. healthy hair is something everyone wants but so few of us know how to get there. :sad:

:lachen::lachen::lachen::lachen::lachen:
 
No, I don't get upset, I only really get questions who people who know me well for a long time. My hair has never been past my shoulders my entire life. And then, it was thin and breaking. Now it is healthy, thick, and bra strap length. Of course they are going to ask what the deal is. Even though my hair has grown, if I knew some one who only ever had should length hair, but mostly neck length, then all of a sudden in 2 years it grow down to her back, I'd want to know what was up too. No one has been rude to me, and I try to give tips of how I grew my hair and it is mostly roundly rejected as something they would never try so I don't worry about it much.
 
Depends upon how they question it, but so far no. I can't blame them though because I stretch and wear PS most of the time (or rollersets that hide my length) so when I wear my BSL hair fully straightened it's got to be a big surprise. :yep:
 
No but it's after they find out it's mine when I hear the rude comments and what I should do with all that hair. Mostly people are nice about it, I dont think I've actually had any problems with people and my hair.
 
Oh no...I'm just WAITING for the day :)

Oh yes - me too! :grin: But if I ever told anyone the amount of time and effort that I go to just to get my hair looking healthy they'd look at me like I was crazy. People don't want to wait months upon months to get health and length.
 
No, i dont get upset it makes me feel good about what i am trying to accomplish.
 
I love it... I've had it happen a few times... I remember when I had a rollerset early last year and people asked me what kind of hair I used for my weave, I couldn't help grinning :-) I was glad to give them tips about how to get healthier hair.

Another time was this year when I wore a braidout at about 10/11 weeks post, I wasn't even feeling like my hair looked so nice that day and was pleasantly surprised when people asked me if it was my hair - because my hair is shorter than it was last year but I guess it's fuller.

I really wouldn't care if people doubted it was my hair, that's their problem... as long as noone puts their fingers in my hair, I'm good.
 
That used to happen to me when I had a permed my hair bone straight and my hair was just shoulder length. It was just thick and healthy looking and my girl friends would always pull on my hair to see if I had some pieces to make it look thick. It did not bother me, but I was surprised that people were amazed that it was my hair and it was not even long.
 
Sadly people always assumed my own hair was weave because it was always so thick and that my fake hair was my real hair. LOL. It dosen't bother me as long as they don't touch it without asking. I dont' have that problem now though I have a twa. They know its mine now. LOL
 
my hair is collarbone lenght finally and about a month ago I had went to work with my hair down ( had just had a wash n set the day before) and my manager asked me if it was my hair and ran her fingers through my hair ! i was sooo happy!!!!!!!!!!!!! I have never had anyone ask me that before. And my hair isnt even that long yet.. but its getting there my next stop hopefully will be APL by december 2009.
 
The nerve of some people! They pulled on a ponytail to see if it was real? What if they had pulled it off in front of a bunch of people? Is is their goal to embarrass you? Why do they think you'll lie when they ask you if it's your hair or not? Is it really that serious? Wow. That's just plain disrespectful. Especially if they're a complete stranger.
 
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