Different libidos

zzirvingj

zzirvingj

New Member
Have you ever been with a man that didn't want sex as much as you did? If so, why didn't he? How did it afffect your relationship?

Or have you ever been in the opposite situation (he wanted it wayyyy more)?
 
I've been in the first situation before, it sucked and I refuse to ever be in it again.

I will say though that I'm kind of hard to keep up with, so it probably wasn't totally his fault. :lol:
 
Opposite situation=didn't work out.
Way too stressful, I couldn't be SEEN w/o him wanting some. UGH!
 
Either that he was seeing someone else or that he wasn't really that attracted to me.
These are the worries I would have.
 
i have and it was horrible. i shouldn't have to beg my man for sex. this was when i was younger around 22. i wanna say it was because he smoked a lot..but who knows. it messes with me having me think hes not attracted to me or cheating.
 
My ex never wanted to have sex..but he had health issues which contributed to his low sex drive..but it still drove me crazy..I would stare @ him in the middle of the nite..like WTF..how are we sleeping together everynite and only have sex once a month...
 
Back in the day one of my boyfriends had diabetes. I was young and didn't even know that could effect our sex life. Poor thing he had the desire but his body would not cooperate.
 
ms.mimi said:
Back in the day one of my boyfriends had diabetes. I was young and didn't even know that could effect our sex life. Poor thing he had the desire but his body would not cooperate.
Click to expand...

this is my situation. Sometimes my boyfriend (He's diabetic) is so tired but I want tooo SOOO bad! so we compromise :look:
 
Yes and let me tell you it's tough. My DH has a lower libido than me and it's the cause of a lot of problems. I don't know what's causing it but I've been telling him he needs to go see a Dr.

I know he's not cheating (don't ask me how I know :sekret:) but I still have thoughts at times and I often struggle with my self esteem because I feel that he's not attracted to me.


Sent from TopNotch1010's iPhone using LHCF
 
He worked a LOT and was always tired. Another case was also a smoker. He went to the doctor, got viagra and it worked. He was 25 and i couldnt fathom 25 and viagra so I bounced.
 
Qtee said:
My ex never wanted to have sex..but he had health issues which contributed to his low sex drive..but it still drove me crazy..I would stare @ him in the middle of the nite..like WTF..how are we sleeping together everynite and only have sex once a month...
Click to expand...

Once a month? Wow. :sad:

I am beginning to wonder what is a normal libido for a man in my age range (early 30's)?

Daily? Twice a week normal? Once a week? I would say that for me, for instance, I would consider once a month to be a very low sex drive.
 
thats why it is very important for a woman to know their SO's health situation...male or female ones health is such a a tell-tale sign to everything else...

I briefly had a SO who had MS and obviously it affected his libido...and that is why our situation was brief....
 
A person's libido will not always be the same through life...sooner or later a couple will be out of sync with each other and one will want it more than the other.

Respect and patience is key...as well as open communication.

I've been in both situations. As long as both people are working towards a healthy medium it's all good.
 
topnotch1010 said:
Yes and let me tell you it's tough. My DH has a lower libido than me and it's the cause of a lot of problems. I don't know what's causing it but I've been telling him he needs to go see a Dr.

I know he's not cheating (don't ask me how I know :sekret:) but I still have thoughts at times and I often struggle with my self esteem because I feel that he's not attracted to me.


Sent from TopNotch1010's iPhone using LHCF
Click to expand...

I'm sorry. :sad: I hope it gets better over time. I can imagine how this must feel.
 
Last edited:
zzirvingj said:
Once a month? Wow. :sad:

I am beginning to wonder what is a normal libido for a man in my age range (early 30's)?

Daily? Twice a week normal? Once a week? I would say that for me, for instance, I would consider once a month to be a very low sex drive.
Click to expand...
Yeah he was diabetic..so he was always so tired..and not in the mood..I stayed cause I knew what it was and that it wasnt my fault..
 
Qtee said:
Yeah he was diabetic..so he was always so tired..and not in the mood..I stayed cause I knew what it was and that it wasnt my fault..
Click to expand...

Understandable.

SO. Ladies, what if you were dating someone that only wanted it like once a month? And you were 'pretty' sure he wasn't seeing anybody else (so he is attracted to you)? And you're not aware of any health problems?

Would you stick it out?
 
zzirvingj said:
Understandable.

SO. Ladies, what if you were dating someone that only wanted it like once a month? And you were 'pretty' sure he wasn't seeing anybody else (so he is attracted to you)? And you're not aware of any health problems?

Would you stick it out?
Click to expand...

I probably wouldn't stick it out. You don't have too, unless he's serving it up in other areas, like wining and dining you and treating you like a queen. If not, I'd be looking for a new love.
 
zzirvingj said:
Understandable.

SO. Ladies, what if you were dating someone that only wanted it like once a month? And you were 'pretty' sure he wasn't seeing anybody else (so he is attracted to you)? And you're not aware of any health problems?

Would you stick it out?
Click to expand...

No. Well is he willing to see someone to figure out why? Cuz I would wanna know.
 
zzirvingj said:
Understandable.

SO. Ladies, what if you were dating someone that only wanted it like once a month? And you were 'pretty' sure he wasn't seeing anybody else (so he is attracted to you)? And you're not aware of any health problems?

Would you stick it out?
Click to expand...

i can hang with a couple of times a week ..but ONCE A MONTH!? and no health issues..i'm gone :nono:
i can't. i thrive on my man wanting me. I love a man that can't keep his hands off me. i love my man being turned on by me and i love being one with him repeatedly lol. once a month..? oh hell no! :nono:
 
zzirvingj said:
Understandable.

SO. Ladies, what if you were dating someone that only wanted it like once a month? And you were 'pretty' sure he wasn't seeing anybody else (so he is attracted to you)? And you're not aware of any health problems?

Would you stick it out?
Click to expand...

Only if I didn't want it but once per month. But being that I need it/want it/like it much more often than that, no. It would not work out. However, I once dated a man who had ED, but that didn't stop him from pleasing me. He was... very creative :yep:
 
His is much stronger than mine on account of my situation. (long story, but the sh*t came back...ugh!) So I'm going through a rather rough patch as my Dr's try to get my hormones under some semblance of control. Man I tell you, the female body is crazy....

At any rate, I think that if the lines of communication are open, then sure. My husband loves me and I him, and I give him pleasure in other ways, even when I'm not exactly feeling it. But if it were not a deep and meaningful relationship, then I wouldn't expect him to stay (I wouldn't, i'm a ***** right about now :lol:)

Its rough when one doesn't have the sex drive the other has. But I think that if you've been in a long relationship that has its good side(s), its something you talk about and communicate with the other. Otherwise, no reason to stick around because it can get ugly.

-A
 
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