OK,
coolsista-paris I don't see anything you're doing that is wrong so far. I don't like Shea butter and like you it made my hair soft on application but it'd dry and I'd be left with steel wool or a brush for hair.
Plus combing it was impossible once dry. Still, it works for many plus your hair is braided so can't knock it...and don't see any problem there.
I don't know about many products but if your products are full of protein then you need a very good DCing conditioner. When I hear Apoghee (a product I've never used BTW) I always think of protein so if it is, I'd suggest a moisture shampoo and then just use any strengthening ones once a while kinda like how people do protein treatments. I consider Garnier Fructis a strengthening shampoo and use if I feel I've gone a little too long w/o using a reconstructor to condition my hair.
(im trying to make the comb pass trhough easily but maybe thats wrong as im natural and that im just waisting my time and hair doing that?) do you try to make the comb go through by combing again and again??
OK, yes and no. First of all, for you to be able to get the comb to go through your hair, you hair CANNOT be dry. The only time you will see me combing my hair like that is when it's wet and full of conditioner like in this clip:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VCcoXph8tF4
But notice what I do: while the slip of conditioner + water can make the comb go through over and over with ease, I still use my hand to open up the curls so that pathway for the comb is easy.
Hair that isn't straight or wavy is curly or coil, so after the comb goes through, the coils wrap around each other so you have hair that cannot let a comb through. It doesn't matter how many times you do this, the elasticity of the coils will cause them to retract and hook up again.
But ^^this is even more so if you're combing dry hair. I use S Curl as my moisturizer when combing my hair because it's wet and slippery and makes my hair feel the way it does when wet with conditioner. I can comb over and over as I do with conditioner without hair breaking all over the place.
Another thing to remember is you are SUPPOSED to lose at least 50-100 PER DAY. That is the normal way things work. If you've been in braids for a whole week (7 days), we're talking about 350-700 hairs that you should've lost. They don't get glued back to your head just coz you didn't mess with your hair. Your follicles spit them out and they just stay caught up in your braids until you undo. So you will get a lot of hairs coming out after a whole week of not manipulating your hair. In fact, since you use a wide tooth comb, you probably don't remove them all so the ones from last week are still there this week so each week just seems to have more hairs being lost. But if you were not losing hair then it'd mean your hair were not growing so shed hairs are a good sign that your follicles are still alive and well and getting ready to produce new fresh hairs that will be in even better condition than before because you are eating better now and caring for your hair better with knowledge you've acquired thus far.
So this is what I suggest, do all your combing, when you wash your hair. Read
this thread explaining how I wash in braids and wash like this. It takes long when you first do it, but you will be so glad you did.
When you finish washing, airdry in braids as I suggest than undo each braid and apply your moisturizer. If you are able to, part a narrow section of the braid, apply moisturized well and run the comb through. Part another narrow section, moisturie and run the comb through again. Or if you're more comfortable applying to damp hair, then do so before your hair airdries at the end of the wash. The dampness of the hair will make stretching it and passing comb through easy. Then braid the hair that YOU know is fully detangled because you have been combing it all along and leave it along to airdry stretched.
When you undo, you will not need to run the comb through again. All the combing you did will have removed shed hair and confirmed your hair is free of tangles. So now you can do your braids. And because you part smaller sections to braid, combing those should be easy because your hair is stretched, or you may find like in the image I showed of my airdried bare hair, that you don't need to comb at all. You can finger part and the hair is so well separated and stretched you can just braid it.
So what will you have done, you will have done the PROPER combing while hair is wet and slippery. You will have removed all shed hair during the washing process. You will have hair that is fully detangled and so you can braid it knowing that there are no tangles. Come wash day again, you follow this procedure and I assure you, you will find that your hair isn't the nightmare it seems to be. (BTW it looks beautiful in your profile.)
I hope I answered all your questions. Let me know if I left any out.