Desperate Need of Help for my Teen's Hair

[TyHill21]

Okay so a bit of background on her:
She got a relaxer when she turned 10 (bad mistake-I know.......) She is 13 now. Her hair kept breaking off and it shed like no ones business. I was told by her stylist to not comb it , do not use any heat, etc. ........ NO change still the same breakage
So fast forward to December of 2008 her hair started breaking off in one spot so I said thats it, no more relaxers we are going to keep you in braids and cornrows(with extensions) this is what we did all year. We changed her braids every like 3 weeks, she kept them moisturized with evoo and she went right back into them after a wash (since september co-wash) and possibly a blow dry.
So fast forward to last Wednesday. I decided to give her hair a rest and straighten it.
I need help on what to do to her hair-her ends feel like a brillo pad (pics attached)
After wash & DC

After blow dry

Straightened

What products should I be using? Should I go back to braids? keep it straight? Please advise me.

 

[supermodelsonya]

You stated you kept it moisturized with EVOO? EVOO is oil. You can't moisturize with it, you can only seal. YOu need a moisturizing product. I use SCurl and seal with jojoba oil. That's probably why her hair is dry.

 

[aegis]

her hair looks fine. how is her bald spot doing? since she is natural when you do take her hair out you need to make sure it is moisturized which can be hard. s curl and something water based would be great and then maybe seal with a good heavy oil like castor oil. i think you have a good reggie going for her. i would keep her in braids and twists until she knows how to properly care for her hair. also make sure to clarify her hair each time you take her braids down.

 

[TyHill21]

her hair looks fine. how is her bald spot doing? since she is natural when you do take her hair out you need to make sure it is moisturized which can be hard. s curl and something water based would be great and then maybe seal with a good heavy oil like castor oil. i think you have a good reggie going for her. i would keep her in braids and twists until she knows how to properly care for her hair. also make sure to clarify her hair each time you take her braids down.

Her bald spot was the start of all her natural hair I can't tell where it was anymore. All her hair broke off and thats all new hair -her last relaxer was like end of November 08

 

[glamazon386]

You mentioned that you washed and possibly blowdried between sets of braids but what about conditioning? Are you deep conditioning her hair regularly? Also putting oil on top of hair that is already dry is only sealing the hair and keeping any potential moisture from getting in. You need to use some type of leave in conditioner/moisturizer and then you can seal with oil on top. I like EV Coconut Oil for my natural hair. Maybe you can try shea butter - some people whip their shea butter with coconut or olive oil and use it like that as they braid. It keeps the hair soft even through cowashes.

As far as styles go - keeping it straight is only putting unnecessary heat and stress on her recovering natural hair. I'd say keep her in braids and natural styles just make sure they're not too tight.

 

[Odd One]

Id say keep it in braids and deep condition! a good deep condition imo is the key to softer healthier hair.

use braid spray to moisturize while in braids. and, depending on what type of braids she gets, she should be able to cowash too

 

[BlackMasterPiece]

Her hair actually seems to be doing pretty good.

Okay so your issue with her is dryness?

I would say give LeKair Cholesterol a try slather it in generously tie her head in a plastic cap or bag and sit her under a dryer for 30+ minutes that works wonders for me and me and your daughter have the same hair type.

Try mixing oils into her DC's or just doing hot oil treatments.

Aveda Has wonderful moisture DC's

Are you using shampoo's that contain sulfates to wash her hair? What conditioners are you using?

What is your straightening method and what are your tools? I've recently reviewed what I feel to be the healthiest tools for straightening 4a/b hair in my blog so maybe you can give that a look for ideas.

Also, try an Avocado DC. Get a ripe Avocado, throw it in the mixer untill its a smooth creamy consistency, then add EVOO to it and you have an excellent DC.

Braids are great but I would also recommend twists, I find them to be more gentle on the hair, my favorite are senegalese twists done with kanekalon hair. Also I think it may be helpful to allow her breaks between extension installs to give her scalp a bit a of a break.

 

[glamazon386]

Are you using shampoo's that contain sulfates to wash her hair? What conditioners are you using?

This is a good point too - shampoos with sulfates can be stripping. I never really had problems with dryness but I did notice a difference when I stopped using shampoos with sulfates.

 

[dlewis]

Her hair looks healthy.

 

[TyHill21]

Her hair actually seems to be doing pretty good.


I would say give LeKair Cholesterol a try slather it in generously tie her head in a plastic cap or bag and sit her under a dryer for 30+ minutes that works wonders for me and me and your daughter have the same hair type.
Try mixing oils into her DC's or just doing hot oil treatments.
Aveda Has wonderful moisture DC's

Are you using shampoo's that contain sulfates to wash her hair? What conditioners are you using?

What is your straightening method and what are your tools? I've recently reviewed what I feel to be the healthiest tools for straightening 4a/b hair in my blog so maybe you can give that a look for ideas.

Also, try an Avocado DC. Get a ripe Avocado, throw it in the mixer untill its a smooth creamy consistency, then add EVOO to it and you have an excellent DC.

Braids are great but I would also recommend twists, I find them to be more gentle on the hair, my favorite are senegalese twists done with kanekalon hair. Also I think it may be helpful to allow her breaks between extension installs to give her scalp a bit a of a break.

Okay so your issue with her is dryness? My issue is dryness, the breakage and her ends they look horrible and they are really damaged so damaged that a flatiron cant straighten it

Try mixing oils into her DC's or just doing hot oil treatments. Sounds good thanks.

What conditioners are you using?

how can I tell if it has sulfates in it?
What is your straightening method and what are your tools? I've recently reviewed what I feel to be the healthiest tools for straightening 4a/b hair in my blog so maybe you can give that a look for ideas. I havent brought a good blow dryer yet but my flat iron is a chi its in the background of those picture (red)-I will check your blog out thanks

 

[TyHill21]

I guess I did not capture her ends really good-you can barely see them on that last picture

So my concerns are ends and breakage

 

[glamazon386]

Okay so your issue with her is dryness? My issue is dryness, the breakage and her ends they look horrible and they are really damaged so damaged that a flatiron cant straighten it

Try mixing oils into her DC's or just doing hot oil treatments. Sounds good thanks.

What conditioners are you using?

how can I tell if it has sulfates in it?
What is your straightening method and what are your tools? I've recently reviewed what I feel to be the healthiest tools for straightening 4a/b hair in my blog so maybe you can give that a look for ideas. I havent brought a good blow dryer yet but my flat iron is a chi its in the background of those picture (red)-I will check your blog out thanks

When was the last time she had a trim? How is her hair being handled as it is braided and as the braids are being removed? She could have pixie knots from shrinkage. Also if the hair is not carefully detangled the ends could be being torn through and look raggedy as a result. Just because her ends are raggedy doesn't necessarily mean her hair is damaged. It doesn't look bad to me in the pictures but they aren't close ups. If her ends look that bad then I would trim them. If it's a lot to trim just trim a little bit each time she takes her braids down until the damaged ends are all gone.

If her hair really is that damaged then I wouldn't advise you put heat on it at all. If her hair really is breaking you may need to do a protein treatment. Do you see little broken off hairs when you comb it? Or are you seeing shed hairs?

You can tell if a shampoo has sulfates by reading the ingredients. Most of them have sulfates. I use Elasta QP Creme Conditioning Shampoo. You can get it from the BSS for about $3 to $4 a bottle. It is recommended on their website for natural hair. I know theres a list around here somewhere of sulfate free shampoos.

ETA: Yeah after looking at that first blow dry picture to me it looks like she just needs a small trim. Her hair actually looks pretty healthy. My hair looks like that when I need a trim. And a lot of naturals have a hard time getting their ends smooth.

 

[naturalpride]

She meeds a moisturizing conditioner like Neutrogena Triple Moisture or LeKeir Shea and Mango Cholestoral.

As a daily moisturizer I recommend Qhemet Biologics Olive and Amla Heavy Cream

As a protein you can mix mayo and 2 eggs together and let it sit in her hair for 30-60 minutes

Use olive oil or coconut oil to seal with after a applying a water based moisturizer

 

[naturalpride]

Also try co washing her hair instead of using shampoo. Herbal Essences Hello Hydration is really good for cowashing.

 

[TyHill21]

When was the last time she had a trim? How is her hair being handled as it is braided and as the braids are being removed? She could have pixie knots from shrinkage. Also if the hair is not carefully detangled the ends could be being torn through and look raggedy as a result. Just because her ends are raggedy doesn't necessarily mean her hair is damaged. It doesn't look bad to me in the pictures but they aren't close ups. If her ends look that bad then I would trim them. If it's a lot to trim just trim a little bit each time she takes her braids down until the damaged ends are all gone.

If her hair really is that damaged then I wouldn't advise you put heat on it at all. If her hair really is breaking you may need to do a protein treatment. Do you see little broken off hairs when you comb it? Or are you seeing shed hairs?

You can tell if a shampoo has sulfates by reading the ingredients. Most of them have sulfates. I use Elasta QP Creme Conditioning Shampoo. You can get it from the BSS for about $3 to $4 a bottle. It is recommended on their website for natural hair. I know theres a list around here somewhere of sulfate free shampoos.

ETA: Yeah after looking at that first blow dry picture to me it looks like she just needs a small trim. Her hair actually looks pretty healthy. My hair looks like that when I need a trim. And a lot of naturals have a hard time getting their ends smooth.

she has not had a real trim since she's been natural. I cut the permed strays off. Yes there are tons of little hairs whenever I comb her hair. She takes her braids out which could be a mistake also

Thanks so much all of you have really helped me

 

[glamazon386]

she has not had a real trim since she's been natural. I cut the permed strays off. Yes there are tons of little hairs whenever I comb her hair. She takes her braids out which could be a mistake also

Thanks so much all of you have really helped me

Yeah she definitely needs one then. With natural hair those raggedy ends are going to catch onto each other and cause tangles, make it hard to comb, etc. Those broken pieces could be coming from one strand knots. I get them too. I would start with the trim and begin dcing, moisturizing and sealing regularly and then see what happens.

 

[Lucia]

Yeah she definitely needs one then. With natural hair those raggedy ends are going to catch onto each other and cause tangles, make it hard to comb, etc. Those broken pieces could be coming from one strand knots. I get them too. I would start with the trim and begin dcing, moisturizing and sealing regularly and then see what happens.

ITA, also, lay off any heat at all, for no reason should she need to heat style at all. I'll even go further and say dust the splits every 8-10 weeks until the scab hair is gone. For moisturizing I 3rd the braid spray that's water based and light, not too heavy you don't want gunk and alot of build up in her hair. also a light hair shaft penetrating essential oil is better than a thick sealing oil at this point cause her hair is dry. I suggest EV coconut oil cooking grade at the ethnic section of the supermarket you'll get it cheap or you can order from tropical traditions online. Jojoba is good also but it's hard to find it in a pure form cheaply. Also check your shampoos, conditioners, if they have sulfates don't use them on her, get the sulfate free ones, and only shampoo when her hair's unbraided and detangled.

Keep her braids medium small-medium not too small, to large, too tight and don't get the extensions too long b/c her natural hair can't support that weight now-about shoulder-APL should be fine. You do want a little weight to the braids so it will help draw the hair out.

Keep the sections medium sized too, single box braids w/extension braid hair, would be best cause then she could "style" it up or down and wear hair accessories an it wouldn't be so boring, and you would be able to get to her scalp and hair length and really moisturize and oil. Keep up the 1.5-2 month take down DC, S&D, and re-braid schedule so her hair doesn't get too tangled or too dry if left in too long. HTH

list of sulfate free shampoos
http://archive.longhaircommunity.com/showthread.php?t=34009

article about sulfates
http://thebeautybrains.com/2007/06/30/sulfates-in-shampoos-what-are-they/

 

[*Muffin*]

The only advise I can give is to make sure you are deep conditioning her hair weekly. To get strong, healthy hair she needs the proper balance of protein and moisture. Would you say her hair is very soft and fragile or does it feel very stiff and brittle? If it feel soft and fragile, she probably needs a protein treatment, but if it feels stiff and brittle she needs a good moisturizing DC. Also make sure she sleeps with either a satin scarf around her head or a satin pillow case so she doesn't cause stress on her strands. Leave-in conditioners help the hair stay soft as well.

P.S. Her hair looks pretty good to me. I think it just needs a bit of rest. Try not to wash it too much or manipulate it, and it should be ok. And heat-styling puts a lot of stress on the strands and can worsen damaged hair, but if she insists on having it pressed, make sure you use a heat protectant.

 

[Tamrin]

You need to stay away from heat.

DC her hair on a weekly basis and alternate between protein and moisturizing conditioners

Do not let her take her braids out herself she may be ripping her hair

She needs a small trim

Moisturize her hair using a water based creamy moisturizer first then seal with oil.

 

[lilsparkle825]

This post echoes my sister's ordeal -- got her hair relaxed at a young age, her hair broke off to the scalp by the time she was 11, then she stopped getting relaxers and went into braids year-round and now she is between APL and BSL at age 14. When we take out her braids, we soak her hair in VO5 to detangle, then prepoo overnight before washing and DCing. The next day I install the braids or twists (make sure you are using 100% Kanekalon) and she maintains them by spraying them every other day with a braid spray I made from HE Hello Hydration, water and EVOO and washing/DCing with diluted shampoo and conditioner every other week (this way, they don't get fuzzy too fast). After 6-8 weeks I take them down and repeat this process.

You have a good grasp on the basics, it's just the details you need work on. First of all, don't move two steps forward only to go one back. Cut out the blow drying and straightening...she's making wonderful progress and you don't wanna ruin it! Next, get a good moisturizer...the S-Curl is a good suggestion, or make a moisturizer like I did (preferably with aloe vera juice or glycerin in it). Also, don't forget about the DCing!

Good luck with her hair!

 

[TyHill21]

This post echoes my sister's ordeal -- got her hair relaxed at a young age, her hair broke off to the scalp by the time she was 11, then she stopped getting relaxers and went into braids year-round and now she is between APL and BSL at age 14. When we take out her braids, we soak her hair in VO5 to detangle, then prepoo overnight before washing and DCing. The next day I install the braids or twists (make sure you are using 100% Kanekalon) and she maintains them by spraying them every other day with a braid spray I made from HE Hello Hydration, water and EVOO and washing/DCing with diluted shampoo and conditioner every other week (this way, they don't get fuzzy too fast). After 6-8 weeks I take them down and repeat this process.

You have a good grasp on the basics, it's just the details you need work on. First of all, don't move two steps forward only to go one back. Cut out the blow drying and straightening...she's making wonderful progress and you don't wanna ruin it! Next, get a good moisturizer...the S-Curl is a good suggestion, or make a moisturizer like I did (preferably with aloe vera juice or glycerin in it). Also, don't forget about the DCing!

Good luck with her hair!

I have only recently been using kankelon since I joined the board so that is a hair staple for her now.

 

[Bettina]

Hey Ty your daughter's hair reminds me of my own---it looks like her hair (the strand) is fine...It took me a min to know how to handle my hair but I got it down now. My hair before it was moisturized properly felt dry and tangled badly, what helped me to detangle was patience and oil---I used Giovanni Smooth as Silk Deep conditioner on my hair or Pantene (I know it gets a bad rep here but my hair loves it!!!)Moisture renewal conditioner after washing with a non sulfate soap Dr. Bronners castille soap (diluted) I use either or and while my hair was still wet I applied coconut (extra virgin) oil to my scalp (very dry) and hair. My hair was soft for days

I agree with the ladies above about a dusting --I just had one not too long ago. I feel you should wait a little longer before using heat on her hair (allow it some time to rest and gain strength) I think it is wonderful of you protective styling her hair just make sure you take measures to detangle well and avoid setbacks.

Her hair looks thick and lush and she will have the length to follow in a bit.
Sorry this is so long.