Color-exting

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*~Mocha~*

Well-Known Member
Lol..

I'm not sure if I can put sexting in the title.

But anyway, what is your opinion on it?

At almost 30, I feel too old to be doing it. I think of it as something teens do and find it pointless. At times, it even feels odd and disrespectful. However, I'm a prude and I'm trying to loosen up a bit. I'm slowly learning of little things that causes me to remain single.

My question is 'inspired' by a text encounter I had last week.

Basically, he's away and where texting our usual hellos. The convo turns sexual and he's texting all this stuff.. And me, being a prude, who thinks she's old, was a tad bit put off. After a few of his messages I said, 'I hope you aren't expecting sex on our next date' he got upset and said that's typical 'me' behavior to ruin things.

Lol!! I'm lost and confused. After that he didn't seem interested in speaking to me and haven't heard from him.

I think this, piled on my insecurities was the straw. Im trying to exude confidence but it's hard when you don't believe it.

Sorry my one question, now has many..

So sexting, yay or nah
Am I being too much of a prude
Did he overact or am I just a hot arse mess!

I'm so tempted to text him or call but don't want to be brushed off.
 
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It sounds like you haven't had sex with this guy so it's cool. Don't let him make you think you did something wrong. If anything, instead of your statement you could've just ignored it or said you had to go to bed/get ready for tomorrow/run to the store, etc. and let it drop. If he pushed it on you later then that's an indication of what he's about so you would have to determine whether that's for you. We sound very similar...
 
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Just saw the post above mine...yeah flirty is cool but be careful men love to take it as far as you'll let them so employ the cutoff method described above if needed. If confronted directly about the cutoff then acknowledge it with a "LOL" or other nonapologetic vague blowoff and keep it moving. No need to explain. Explaining and being honest is where women go wrong:look:
 
*~Mocha~* said:
Lol..

I'm not sure if I can put sexting in the title.

But anyway, what is your opinion on it?

At almost 30, I feel too old to be doing it. I think of it as something teens do and find it pointless. At times, it even feels odd and disrespectful. However, I'm a prude and I'm trying to loosen up a bit. I'm slowly learning of little things that causes me to remain single.

My question is 'inspired' by a text encounter I had last week.

Basically, he's away and where texting our usual hellos. The convo turns sexual and he's texting all this stuff.. And me, being a prude, who thinks she's old, was a tad bit put off. After a few of his messages I said, 'I hope you aren't expecting sex on our next date' he got upset and said that's typical 'me' behavior to ruin things.

Lol!! I'm lost and confused. After that he didn't seem interested in speaking to me and haven't heard from him.

I think this, piled on my insecurities was the straw. Im trying to exude confidence but it's hard when you don't believe it.

Sorry my one question, now has many..

So sexting, yay or nah
Am I being too much of a prude
Did he overact or am I just a hot arse mess!

I'm so tempted to text him or call but don't want to be brushed off.
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My bad!

I missed his reply...

No, he is being manipulative. I'm guessing that you two haven't had sex yet? Ignore him and move on.

Yeah, you did shut him down, but I can't judge how bad it was because I don't know the content of his text. If it was flirty, maybe you could've flirted back. If he was outright "fresh", then he was probably testing the waters to see if you would sleep with him sooner than later.

He took a jab at you with his response. Dead it.
 
You are never too old to do anything that is physically possible. I love sexting. Flirting. Chatting. Et cetera.

I think he was bold in his approach and should know better. If you two have not been intimate or discussed being intimate he should have been so forward. But you did not need to tell him that sex wasn't going to occur. You could have LOLed him and told him you have something else to attend to. If he is not contacting you any more, do not contact him.

I agree with the person that said that is where women go wrong explaining themselves.
 
It's nothing to do with age.

Its more to do with your type of sexuality. Additionally how confident you feel can alter just how much of your sexuality you express. Maybe it's just not for your tastes, maybe insecurity is blocking it.

To be honest, while I haven't minded a bit of sexting in the past I would be suspicious if a man took it there when early dating. Usually I control when sex gets discussed at a deeper level for the first time. I haven't had anyone force it themselves. They should be happy enough to be in my presence and not want to put a foot wrong:look:.

Is this man a date, or is he your bf?? I'm annoyed that he complained about how you are. If that's the case piss off. If he wants something other than what you are I'm sure he can find it. There are also plenty of men who can take, or leave sexting. It would be hard to explore your sexuality with someone who isn't patient and loving about it.
 
Yes op he was testing the waters lol I always think it's rude to push up on somebody and all this technology is making it a whole lot easier.
 
Sumra said:
To be honest, while I haven't minded a bit of sexting in the past I would be suspicious if a man took it there when early dating. Usually I control when sex gets discussed at a deeper level for the first time. I haven't had anyone force it themselves. They should be happy enough to be in my presence and not want to put a foot wrong:look:.

Is this man a date, or is he your bf?? I'm annoyed that he complained about how you are. If that's the case piss off. If he wants something other than what you are I'm sure he can find it. There are also plenty of men who can take, or leave sexting. It would be hard to explore your sexuality with someone who isn't patient and loving about it.
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I agree with all of this.
I'd be annoyed and put off if someone discussed that so early on, and his comment about how I am would probably most likely would have led me to check him. I would have told him that I'm not comfy with talking/texting about your crayon and my puss so early on so if you looking for that type of party then maybe I'm not the one for you. That would of course probably make him respond back with something nice or not so nice lol... oh well.
 
nlamr2013 said:
Yes op he was testing the waters lol I always think it's rude to push up on somebody and all this technology is making it a whole lot easier.
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yeppp it makes ppl text their foolishness and then they will passive aggressively test the waters... *** with that. Just as much as they can be slick with the texts.. I can be just as slick and a lot more crass/snarky/scathing depending on what the situation calls for or my mood :spinning:.
 
OP, a non response to his last text will be loud and clear. No need to go back and forth with him...he'll be back anyway.
 
I sext my husband all the time. He's not that into it, but that doesn't stop me from letting him know what's on my mind. I don't send nude pics though. I'll never do that.
 
There's a huge difference between what one does with their husband, with someone they are in an established relationship with vs. someone they are newly dating and hasn't busted a sweat with yet.

His response warrants no response from you. Move on to the next one on the bench. This is why I keep telling people don't be so fast to commit to one dude. Have a few on deck until one has organically moved up to the captains table. Now you have to start interviewing again.
 
Guess I'm a prude too. I consider that "husband behavior". No age on it though...my hubs and I sexted and we were 42 and 52. I wouldn't do it with just a boyfriend. What happens to those texts and pics after you break up? What if he isn't tech savvy? I sent a racy pic to someone once...not nude but "racy" and they sold the phone having cleared off the phone but not the card. I don't remember exactly how it was tracked back to me but the person who bought the phone bugged the crap out of me until I changed my number.
 
Girl, are you serious? You are far from old.

You are 30, not 85! Let your hair down, get dirty!

Sexting is fun!
 
Yes to sexting...nothing wrong with spicing it up. Yes, you're being a prude(from a mans point of view) just loosen up IF you're feeling him. Men are simple creatures and sex appeal is important in a relationship. Yes, he's being a arse-hole, but you turn him on then ruined it lol! Move on. He seems like he's only interested in sex if he quit talking to you after you mentioned not having sex.
 
I think he was a bit forward if you all haven't been intimate. So I would have put him on ignore. Sexting doesn't have an age limit IMO but it's not for everyone. You already claimed the prude title so it may not be for you.
 
It's like anything else sexual, different strokes for different folks and we all don't have to like the same things. There is absolutely nothing wrong with your opinion of it and, if it's that serious for him, there are plenty of available women who enjoy sexting.
 
Sexting in a non relationship nay
Sexting in a relationship yay (if the couple enjoys that)

Prudish? Nah. Your retort was harsh though. Simply cooling him off by bringing the conversation back down by a simple flirtatious remark would have sufficed.

Almost all of them try it. However if they don't respond well to the redirecting then good riddance. Thats all he was after anyways
 
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